Showing posts with label usa. Show all posts
Showing posts with label usa. Show all posts

Tuesday, December 20, 2022

World Cup 2022 Part 4 - The Knockouts

 

Qatar Making Sure It's Not Just About the Winners

3/12/22 – Round of 16
Netherlands v USA
The last 16 got underway with the Netherlands playing the USA. It never ceases to amaze me how much the Americans annoy me when it comes to football. From the insistence of calling it soccer to the U.S.A. chants, which remind me of shit behaviour of their fans in the Ryder Cup. Today on social media I managed to see a clip of Joe Biden, the current president saying “it’s called soccer”, whilst pretending to receive a pass. I wonder what the chances are of him being around when the next World Cup, overbloated to 48 teams, is held in a combination of Canada, Mexico and the good old U.S.A, U.S.A, U.S.A, I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN…. Fuck off!.

Anyway, hopefully the Netherlands would turn up and sort them out and the first half went exactly according to my plan with their ridiculous full back Denzel Dumfries, setting up the first goal for Memphis Depay and the second for Daley Blind on the stroke of half-time. The second half saw the Dutch butchering any number of opportunities, usually through trying to give the ball to Stephen Bergwijn or receive it and it looked for one horrible moment like the USA would somehow snatch something from the game when Wright, their substitute scored quite possibly the luckiest goal in history as it hit his heel and looped up over the goalkeeper and dropped into the far corner of the net. That will have had the nurses a bit worried in the Biden Carehome.

Anyway, the Dutch then decided to stop pissing about in the final third and with Blind having the ball out on the left and Dumfries completely unmarked on the right hand side of the penalty area, it was just a case of if the cross had enough quality on it and it did and the right back buried it and with it, all the USA chants and Star-Spangled Banner and all the fancy dress dickheads In the crowd can go home. With that, Louis Van Gaal’s orange army went through to the quarter-finals.

Argentina v Australia
Argentina against Australia is one of those games where you want both teams to lose but before the kick-off I was expecting the most one-sided game of the tournament. Didn’t exactly turn out that way because though Argentina dominated pretty much from the start, all they had to show for it was a brilliant goal by Messi and they went in 1-0 up at half-time. It looked like it was all over at the start the second half when Australian goalkeeper Mat Ryan pissed about, took a horrendous touch and was robbed by Julian Alvarez who turned in the simplest goal he will have ever scored to make it 2-0. The Aussies had spirit though and had a stroke of luck when a shot was heading for the corner flag but instead of going onwards towards the corner flag it hit an Argentinian defender who was just trying to get back in position and flew in the far corner of the net. The Aussies actually had a chance to send it into extra time but Aston Villa’s Emi Martínez made a decent save to preserve Argentina‘s place in the quarter-finals. They will of course play against the Netherlands.

4/12/22
France v Poland


Giving the Keeper 'The Eyes' From 25 Yards is Taking the Piss

Last 16 day 2, started with France taking on Poland. Again I was expecting this to be one-sided and theough Poland probably should’ve taken the lead in the first half, once Olivier Giroud put the French ahead just before half-time then it was pretty obvious what was gonna happen in the second half. Incidentally, Giroud, often a player ridiculed his now France’s all-time record goalscorer, ahead of Thierry Henry, Zidane, Platini and all those other great players that they’ve had. Respect.

The story of the second half was that it was time for Mbappe to do his thing, sending the goalkeeper the wrong way from open play, flashing one into the net from the edge of the box and then repeating the trick as the game ran down. Poland got a penalty in the last minute which was converted by Robert Lewandowski in what will probably be his final act at a World Cup finals.

England v Senegal

Seems That Jordan Henderson is Cool Again

England were next up Next against Senegal and Southgate decided on just one change with Marcus Rashford being unlucky to drop out and Bukayo Saka coming back in. The first half an hour was very ropey with England being very pedestrian and coughing up a couple of chances that a better team would’ve taken. We were indebted to a very good save from Pickford to keep the game goalless. He might have short arms but it’s a good job one of them was long enough to get in the way of a shot from Sarr. On 35 minutes, it all changed though as Jude Bellingham broke down the left and superbly picked out Jordan Henderson with his pullback and the Liverpool captain made no mistake. England were going to be slightly fortunate to be going in one ahead at half-time but he got even better in injury time as another break inspired by Bellingham, saw Foden square to Harry Kane on the edge of the box, with just the goalkeeper to be and there’s only one place that’s ending up. Game over.

England are clearly just concentrating on keeping it tight for the opening of the second half but managed to pinch another goal as it was Foden this time in getting away on the left-hand side and crossed it for Bukayo Saka to produce a lovely finish past Edouard Mendy to make it three and it meant that the rest of the game was much like the Wales game, with England emptying the bench and resting players and get into the final whistle with no alarms whatsoever.

Again, it has to be said that Gareth Southgate got a completely right but now comes the real test as we play our first really good side in the shape of France. I really hope Southgate sticks with the back four but I suspect he won’t and that he’ll go with a back five which basically means that one out of Henderson, Bellingham, Saka or Foden will be left out. Be brave Gareth. If we go super defensive and get beat then it’s not gonna be a good look. If however, we have a go and get beat, most people will forgive it.

5/12/22
Japan v Croatia


Can Yoshida Take a Pen?  No

Japan and Croatia are up next, in a meeting of the universally loved Japanese and Dejan Lovren.  It was all Japan in the first half and they took the lead just before half-time when the corner dropped to Celtic’s mahi to put them in front. Unfortunately, the Japanese could only last 10 minutes of the second half before a Kramaric cross from the right is superbly headed in by Ivan Perišić.  Neither team could find another goal in normal time or in extra time so for the first time in this World Cup, we had a penalty shootout.  As a Southampton fan, it was somewhat strange to see the two captains shaking hands for the coin toss, seeing as they were both once Southampton teammates. One of course being a very popular Maya Yoshida and the other one being the twat Lovren, who admittedly was Croatia’s third choice captain as the other two had been substituted.


Unfortunately, the Japanese basically shit the bed with three of their penalty takers, including Yoshida, taking one pace run-ups and hitting the kind of penalties that if the keeper goes the right way, then he is going to save it. Croatia went through with comparatively little fuss or tension. The only consolation was that it was not Lovren who scored the winning penalty.

Brazil v South Korea
This game of course should probably have been Brazil against Uruguay which would’ve been an interesting test for the South American favourites for the tournament but as it was, South Korea were in town and it wasn’t a test at all.

Four goals in the opening half an hour meant that the rest of the game was like a training game with South Korea making the store slightly more respectable in the second half. Not that you can be too much into it because of the standard of the opposition but Brazil looked very impressive in the first half with goals from Vinicius Jr, Neymar, Richarlison and Lucas Paqueta. They still haven’t been tested though and will probably only marginally be tested more by Croatia in the quarter-finals.

6/12/22
Spain v Morocco


Morocco Officially Goes Mental

In all the games in this round, there was a clear favourite and so far, every favourite had gone through with the minimum of fuss but now it was time for Spain against Morocco.

A team that passes the ball to death against a team were quite happy to sit in and defend and have so far in this World Cup, looked very adept at doing that. The game went exactly as suspected with Spain having a ridiculous amount of possession and then getting to the edge of the penalty area and then passing it again. Morocco took every chance they could to break on Spain with pace and they looked the better side throughout the first half. On the left wing of course they had Sofiane Boufal, Southampton nearly – legend who is such a ridiculously fun player to watch even though the end product isn’t often there.

Anyway, the second half went on with Spain again passing instead of shooting and Morocco got more and more entrenched and it was pretty boring and we reached 90 without any real chances for either side. In extra time it got marginally more interesting as the jeopardy increased and the best chance felt of the Spanish right back in 120th minute as he was picked out at the back post but managed to volley against the far post from a tight angle and so we went to penalties. Spain clearly don’t practice shooting because they don’t do it so why would you practice something that you don’t do but unfortunately that extended to penalties with three of the worst penalties that you could possibly pull out at this time. One against the post and two absolutely shit ones that the keeper just fell on. It eventually came round to a Hakimi who had the opportunity to take the winning penalty against the country of his birth and like a complete shit house he just dinked it down the middle with the goalkeeper diving the wrong way. Every Moroccan in the stadium went absolutely bat shit mental and as the news filtered around the world, it seems that every Moroccan in every major city went absolutely mental as well. Spain it seems, will never learn. They can however, think about it on the way home.

Portugal v Switzerland
The last game of the round was Portugal against Switzerland and this was actually the one that I thought beforehand that the underdog might win. As I’ve said before, there’s not much point to Switzerland in these tournaments but here they are with a genuine chance against a team that hasn’t looked that good but the Portugal boss had an ace up his sleeve having seen Manchester United become a much better side once they dropped no club Ronnie. So, the main prima-donna was on the bench and his replacement Gonçalo Ramos, smashed in a hat-trick as Portugal absolutely buried Switzerland by 6-1. The annoying thing was the Portugal actually looked really good which is a shame because even with No-Club Ronnie not featuring until the last few minutes, they still have Bruno Fernandes and that’s enough for anyone to hate them. Through they go to play Morocco in the next round and it’s kind of hard to see lightning strike in twice with that one.

9/12/22 - Quarter Finals
Brazil v Croatia


Brazil: not Dancing

Quarter-finals in Brazil against Croatia was first up in a game that would provide the first test of any sort that Brazil have had. Whilst Croatia are more workmanlike than inspiring, they are considerably better than anything Brazil have played so far. First half boring….but Brazil had a better chances with the excellent Livakovic saving everything, second-half also boring And much the same as the first, first period of extra time also boring and then Neymar picked up the ball, set off on a run, played a couple of 1-2’s, kept on going and ended up firing Brazil into the lead. The second period of extra time began with Brazil being far too attack minded than they needed to be given the situation and they eventually lost the ball with five men in front of it and only one of the five decided to try and run back as Croatia broke up the left wing, crossed low and there was Petković to score with the aid of a deflection to send the game to penalties.

Croatia keep her Livakovic had already proved he knew what he was doing in the shootout win against Japan and he did it again saving the 1st two Brazilian penalties. Croatia did the business and it eventually fell to Marquinhos with a penalty to keep Brazil in it and he twatted it off the post. Neymar, who saved himself for the glory fifth penalty, didn’t get to take one. How many fucking times have we seen the world’s biggest players fail to step up with it matters.

Croatia march onto the semi-finals where they will play the winner of the Argentina and Netherlands match and Brazil go home after flattering to deceive yes again. Some blame must surely be placed on the manager for playing four forwards, none of whom are interested in tracking back or doing the dirty work when they haven’t got the ball and when one of your two holding midfielders is Lucas Paqueta then you are always going to struggle against a well organised team like Croatia are. Neymar has unfortunately spawned a collection of similar type of players. They are similar in that they are not really interested in doing the hard part of the game and incidentally, they are all Neymar blonde and they are all covered in tattoos right up to the chins. Players like Anthony, Pedro and Rodrygo, really have a long way to go.  They should start with being individual, rather than being a poor copy of someone else.


Argentina v Netherlands

The Shithouse Derby

This game was going nowhere really.  In a poor first half, Argentina took the lead thanks to ridiculous pass by Messi which sent right back Molina through to pass it into the net. The second half saw Messi convert a penalty just after the hour mark after Denzel Dumfries had clumsily brought down the Argentinian left back on the edge of the penalty area. The game seemed to be meandering towards a routine Argentina win until Louis van Gaal pressed the ‘Route 1’ button, sending on Wout Weghorst and Luuk DeJong and launching it. Weghorst pulled one back with a really good flick header, being marked as he was by Manchester United midget Lisandro Martinez and with Argentina losing their discipline and giving away loads of free kicks around the edge of the box, the Dutch came up with something wonderfully inventive and rather than a direct shot, just rolled the freekick into Weghorst on the penalty spot who held off a defender and turned and equalised to send the game to extra time.

It was remarkable that given the Dutch had so much success with playing Route 1 in the last 10 minutes, they then stopped doing it and the game meandered through extra-time and despite Argentina hitting the post, we ended up with penalties again.

Virgil van Dijk stepped up first and saw his effort easily pushed away by Emi Martínez. Messi scored and then Berghuiss saw his penalty saved as well so the Dutch were already in the shit. Argentina did miss one which meant it went right to the end with Lautaro Martinez converting the winning penalty. There was so much shithousing, dreadful tackling and fucking bizarre refereeing in this game the both teams had about eight players booked, courtesy of a ridiculous Spanish referee who desperately wanted it to all be about him.  It was great fun to see players losing their shit and launching into tackles and smashing the ball at the dugouts and all this sort of stuff. When Edgar Davids, complete with sunglasses and wearing a suit, tries to start a fight on the bench, then you know it’s gonna be entertaining. Argentina are basically a team of uncompromising thugs and players who run all day. There is very little in terms of creativity in the team but of course, they have Messi and there are echoes of Argentina‘s 1986 which was very very similar but they had Maradona. Messi 2022 isn’t quite as good as Maradona 1986 but it will be interesting to see whether it’s enough.

Anyway, after all that it’s Argentina against Croatia in the first semi-final.

10/12/22
Portugal v Morocco


It's All About Me

Whilst the world is media focused on No-Club Ronnie, those who are interested in team sports focused on Portugal against Morocco for a place in the semi-final. Morocco have of course exceeded everybody’s expectations so far and Portugal have been a bunch of twats. I think everyone knew how this game was going to go from a stylistic point of view, lots of possession by Portugal with Morocco defending deep and then hitting them hard on the break and that’s how it turned out Joao Felix had a couple of early chances and bought a good save out of the Morocco keeper and U2 singer Bono, before a break up the left wing saw a cross lobbed into the box and the Portuguese keeper came out like an absolute fucking idiot and got completely out jumped by En-Nesyri to give Morocco a one nil lead. What everyone has learnt from this World Cup is that you do not give Morocco the lead.

Bruno Fernandes hit the bar with a cross as the first half drew to a close and the second half just saw Portugal in the ascendancy without really testing the keeper. No-Club Ronnie made his way onto the pitch for the last 35 minutes but looked like a player who has gone over the hill and is cart-wheeling down the other side.  In the end it all became about Portugal histrionics in front of the referee and even a late red card from Morocco couldn’t derail them and they became the first African country to reach the semi-finals of the World Cup. No-Club Ronnie predictably disappeared down the tunnel, barely acknowledging anybody. It was all about him of course. Bye Portugal.

England v France

Projectile Launched into Qatar Sky

The only game that mattered as far as we were concerned was England against France. Would England and Southgate show they had truly come of age and turned a corner or would France show that they are just a class above. Would Southgate go super safe and pick a third centre back. The signs were very encouraging from that point of view as Gareth had his big boy pants on and picked exactly the same team that played against Senegal.

An early Giroud header was easily saved by Pickford before we got the first look at what was going to be a very difficult afternoon of trying to understand what the fucking referee was doing.  Bukayo Saka clearly had his legs wide away from him at the French end of the pitch but I wasn’t given as a foul and so France built up and eventually the ball was squared to Tchouameni, 30 yards out and he absolutely arrowed it into the corner.  Debates as to whether Pickford should have done slightly better but a great strike.  Fuck.

Harry Kane spun onto a Saka pass and saw his effort beaten out by Lloris as England tried to hit back before Kane again got away from the clumsy Upamecano, who brought him down on the edge of the box for the referee give fuck all anyway. Kane then tried from the edge of the box and saw his effort deflected and his Spurs teammate and goal pull off a ‘one for the cameras’ save.

The second half began with an England corner been cleared out to Bellingham on the edge of the box and his superb effort was unfortunate a little bit too central and again the keeper knocked over the bar. England got the break they needed when Saka played a 1-2 with Bellingham in the penalty area and Tchouameni clumsily took down the Arsenal man. Even this rather random referee couldn’t not give it and Kane stepped up to send Lloris the wrong way.

England seemed to take their collective foot off the gas a little bit having equalised and Rabiot bought a good save out of Pickford but England was still the team in the ascendency and Maguire was unfortunate to see a header flick the outside of a post.  Pickford was called into action again to beat out an Olivier Giroud volley but it was a temporary reprieve as the former Arsenal man, who everyone used to disprespect, including some of his French teammates, was there to bullet a header into the net from Griezmann‘s cross after getting there ahead of Maguire.

Southgate hadn’t made any changes at this point and having gone behind, decided now was the moment so I came Henderson and Saka and on came Sterling and Mount to my great personal deflation.  However, a bit of a hopeful ball into the box towards Mount brought maximum reward as Theo Hernandez absolutely brainlessly barged him in the back. Fucking ref didn’t give it of course but VAR got this one right and having had a look at the slow motion, there was again, no way he couldn’t give it as Hernandez was not looking at the ball at any point. Kane versus Lloris part two. Up steps England’s captain and puts up a fucking balloon.

Rashford and Grealish came on for Foden and the injured Stones for the last few minutes and we want a free kick on the edge of the box with more brain-dead French defending. It was Rashford’s moment and he had to score but he put it over the bar and out England went, once more.

Bollocks. The wait goes on. In the past two tournaments, though we’ve got further in that we got to a semi-final and then a final, I don’t feel as much disappointment with this exit as I did with those. With those other two tournaments I felt that we just shit the bed when it mattered and I put a lot of that down to Gareth Southgate‘s conservative approach to things. There are things that in hindsight didn’t work out today. He left it too long to make the changes and I’m not sure that bringing on a very out of form Mason Mount and a very jetlagged Raheem Sterling was really the right thing to do. If it worked however then Southgate would be the hero and that’s the way it works. Personally, I feel that as a manager, Southgate is getting better and for me he’s earned the right to carry on. Whether he will want to carry on or not is the question now.  He immediately spoke of the amount of stick he got after the 4-0 home Nations League defeat to Hungary.  I don’t feel that it’s particularly realistic to complain about getting battered after a defeat like that but maybe it’s a sign that he’s had enough of the scrutiny that comes with being the England manager after six years and three major tournaments. It may well be that he decides that this is a good time to bow out because his reputation is intact and there’s not many managers who get to choose their future.  This seems like the FA want him to carry on though so we’ll just have to wait until the dust settles. I will say that there does seem to be a lack of obvious candidates to replace him.

Some solace can be taken in the fact that the average age of the squad is pretty low and players like Phil Foden, Bukayo Saka, Jude Bellingham and Declan Rice are only going to be getting better. The detractors will say that we have done what we always do and there is an element of truth in that. We’ve beaten all the teams who are comfortably ranked lower than us in Iran, Wales and Senegal but we could only draw with the USA and we got beaten by the first elite team that we came up against. It always seems to be the same way. You can argue it either way, maybe it’s time for a change to give us that extra kick to get us over the line or maybe we should be careful what we wish for.

Today there have been a lot of fingers pointed at the referee and he was truly shocking. There was no way that it wasn’t a foul on Bukayo Saka in the build up to their goal but we had the players back by the time France scored but no one was close enough to Tchouameni. The referee gave us a penalty at the start the second half which he couldn’t really not give and after viewing the monitor, decided to give us a second one as well. The reason we lost is because we missed a penalty and we missed the last minute free-kick. If you want to win tight games against the opposition, then you cannot afford to miss chances like that. France didn’t create many openings but they scored two goals and the bottom line is that is why they are going through to the semi-final against Morocco and that is probably why they will win the whole tournament, again. The good news is that we can look forward to another fucking re-release of Three Lions in 18 months time.

13/12/22 Semi-Finals
Argentina v Croatia


Alvarez Celebrates Messi Beating Half the Team

Whenever England go out, what follows has a certain apathy about it all, as far as I’m concerned. I looked at the two semi-finals and saw two traditional heavyweights against two teams who have over achieved so far and the question would be whether this semi-final was going to be a game too far for either Croatia or Morocco. Croatia against Argentina started off looking like it was going to be a decent close game with Croatia dominated possession but having absolutely nothing upfront.

Eventually the deadlock was broken with Álvarez, how shall we say, winning a penalty by knocking the ball past goalkeeper and then crashing into him. Could argue this one both ways but it was given of course an up stepped Messi to spank it into the top corner. Álvarez scored at start the second half to put the game to bed but there is still time for the coup de grace from Messi as he turned the otherwise excellent Gvardiol inside out on the right wing before driving towards the goal along the by-line and knocking it back for Álvarez to sweep into the net. 3-0 to Argentina and Messi and his supporting cast get through to the final. In some ways it’s an absolute fucking travesty that Argentina have got there because they literally are a goalkeeper, a bunch of thugs and one special player.

14/12/22
France v Morocco

Boufal Booked for Getting in the Way of Hernandez

Morocco had trouble before the game against France even started with Aguerd, one of the starting centre backs, pulling out just before the game. They were a bit of a shambles has the game started, far removed from the well-oiled defensive machine that they’ve been so far and went 1-0 down after a bit of pinball resulted in Hernandez putting them ahead after four minutes. Morocco then lost Roman Saiss after about 15 minutes because he couldn’t run but once they got their fit defenders on the pitch they looks a lot better.

Morocco started playing really fast paced counter-attacking football and were denied what  looked like a clear penalty as Hernandez played the ball, clattered Boufal and somehow Boufal got booked for being fouled in the penalty area. Absolutely fucking bizarre. Anyway, for all Morocco’s endeavour, like Croatia they have very little up front and went in at half-time 1-0 down. The second half had more or less exclusive Morocco pressure for the first 20 minutes before France scored again on the break during the small part to a very lucky deflection that took the ball into the path of substitute Kolo Muani, who couldn’t miss. Morocco kept going to be fair, but all they did was illustrate their inadequacies at the top end of the pitch, managing to miss ridiculous chances and so the game eventually petered out to give us an Argentina against France final.

From an England point of view, I was watching it thinking that if we had beaten France, we would’ve struggled against this Morocco side who played with no fear and fair play to them for a great tournmanet.

17/12/22
3rd Place Playoff
Croatia v Morocco
Croatia beat Morocco 2-1 and no one outside of those two countries gave a shit.  Seriously, no one.

18/12/22
World Cup Final
France v Argentina


The Key Moment in the Final - 123rd Minute

To the final and the build-up has been nauseating with everyone forgetting that they would be 20 other players on the pitch apart from Messi and and Mbappé. Gianni Infantino opened his big fat fucking mouth again and declared it as being the best World Cup ever, which it clearly isn’t if you use metrics like the number of fans attending or the quality of the football. What it probably means is that FIFA have made the most cash out of it. He also spoke about wanting to create a club World Cup with 32 teams in it, which I guess is because FIFA don’t like the success of the UEFA Champions League and what their own piece of the action. Another horrendous idea.

He did say one thing that was welcome though and that was that the 48 team World Cup with the 16 groups of three would be put in the bin where it belonged and though it will still be 48 teams, it is now almost certain that it will be groups of four so we won’t have any corrupt games in the first phase. He said it was because the four-team groups were incredibly exciting in this World Cup and to be fair, he has a point but I do wonder about the real reason he has backtracked.

To the final and Argentina tore into France in the first half with the French barely seeming able to raise a jog, let alone compete with the intensity of the Argentines. France seemed to be half asleep and Dembélé was certainly asleep as DiMaria went round him and waited for the faintest of touches which Dembélé duly provided and over went di Maria, which allowed Messi to stroke in the penalty and the worlds media to stroke themselves into a frenzy.

Going behind didn’t wake France up at all and from their first real attack, Argentina won the ball, broke and via Messi, Álvarez, McAllister and superb finish provided by DiMaria, Argentina went 2-0 up and seemingly coasting. French manager Didier Deschamps decided that he had had enough of the shit he was watching and Dembélé and Giroud were hooked before half-time to be replaced by Thuram and Kolo Muani.

The opening of the second half was pretty dull until Deschamps went for broke, sending on Camavinga and Coman and taken off Griezmann and defender Fernandez. With more attacking players now than you can shake a stick at, Mbappé woke up when Kolo Muani got behind Otamendi who predictably hauled him back for an obvious penalty that Mbappé easily converted. Within a minute it was level as Messi was dispossessed by Coman, who went forward and fed and Mbappé.  Mbappé flicked the ball up to Kolo Muani’s head and went for the return and volleyed it first time across Martinez and into the far corner. Fucking ridiculous goal. France have been utter bollocks but once they’ve woken up, they were amazing. France looked the more likely in normal time but an extra half hour it is.

France are Awake

As the Dutch did when they completed a similar turnaround against Argentina, France then went back into their shell a bit and allowed Argentina to work themselves back into the game. Into the second half of extra time and Argentina got themselves in front again as Lautaro Martinez actually managed to shoot towards the goal for once, forcing Lloris into a decent size before Messi bundled the rebound over the line. With Argentina once more thinking they had won it, the referee then stepped in and gave a penalty for handball when Montiel charged down an Mbappé shot with his elbow clearly moving towards the ball. Excellent refereeing and the correct decision.  Mbappé again, no problem and a hat-trick in a World Cup Final.

We were well past 120 minutes when Kolo Muani found himself clean through after a mistake by Otamendi, but with just Martinez to beat he managed to hit the outstretched leg of the goalkeeper. Argentina broke and a perfect cross was right onto the head of Lautaro Martinez who proved once again that he is absolutely fucking shit by producing a 50p header of the worst kind.

Penalties and there was only ever going to be one winner and that was always going to be Emiliano Martinez. Absolute shit house goalkeeping of the best kind and even managed to get himself booked during the shoot out for throwing the ball away. This was after he’d already saved Kingsley Coman‘s kick it was no surprise when he picked Tchouameni for his main shithousing, throwing the ball away so the French youngster had to go and get it and put it back on the spot.  Yellow card in the bank and Martinez watched Tchouameni’s klick pull wide. Eventually it fell to Montiel to send Hugo Lloris the wrong way from the spot to give Argentina their first World Cup since 1986. Lloris had given off Peter Shilton 1990 vibes by basically collapsing in the goal for every penalty and France had done an England Euro 2020 and sent up kids to do an experienced players’ job.

The final provided great theatre and it was a ridiculously exciting game once France started their comeback in the end but I feel that when the dust has settled, people look at this Argentina side and wonder how on Earth they managed to win it. Personally I don’t feel the standard of this World Cup has been particularly good, with a number of teams seemingly having no striker. Argentina have won this through being hard uncompromising bastards with the sprinkling of magic that Messi provides. It was enough and and now, the fanboys of No-Club Ronnie can shut up. At 35, we are probably seeing the last of Messi in the World Cup. It wouldn’t surprise me if he retired altogether at the end of the season after he inevitably signs off with winning the Ballon D’Or.

So, the latest corruptly awarded World Cup finishes.  FIFA and Infantino got out of jail because in the main, the football was decent, which it was always going to be.  The hosts got what they paid for, a wave if positivity washing over their country. They dressed Messi in some sort of Qatari cloak for him to receive the World Cup – what the hosts and the like of Infantino fail to realise is that it isn’t about them.  It’s about the football and it always will be.  The World Cup would happen without FIFA but could FIFA exist without the football? I found myself less invested with every passing World Cup to be honest and there will come a day in to not too distant future where the Football Associations of the various countries get together and break away.

For now though, we’re all off to Mexico, Canada and the good ol’ U, S of A, the latter of which is of course a country with no human rights issues if you don’t count women of course… and they clearly don’t.



No Caption Necessary

Friday, December 2, 2022

World Cup 2022 Part 2 - Groups A-D


Serious Football Heritage Country

Group A – Qatar, Netherlands, Senegal, Ecuador

20/11/22
So, all eyes will be on the games involving Qatar, playing in their own government run tournament. A government that appear to think nothing of throwing money at things to get what they want.  Qatar versus Ecuador. I have absolutely no desire to watch the opening ceremony or any of the build-up shit so 4 pm it is for the opening game, which is of course Qatar’s easiest game on paper against the South American minnows. I’m actually looking forward to when Qatar play the Dutch because if there’s anyone at this World Cup involved with any of the teams who is going to say it as it is, it’s Louis van Gaal. Partly because of his age and the fact that he has had health issues but mostly because, the man don’t give a fuck.

Anyway, the game was basically League 1 standard and it was pleasing to see that Qatar were absolutely shit and got easily beaten 2-0. It was also amusing to see banks of Qatar fans who had obviously all been given the same T-shirt to wear and it was amazing to see the load of them fucked off as soon as they went a couple of goals behind. In the second half they were massive gaps in the crowds where the fanatical Qatari football fans should’ve been. It was comforting to see that Qatar are not going to be around the tournament for very long.

21/11/22
A potential last 16 game for England is against a team from a Group A. It seemed likely on the face of it that the top two were playing in the next game and oh my God it was shite. Senegal had no ambition beyond getting a point and the Dutch didn’t seem to have the quality to do anything in the final third and so it came to an 80th minute goal to break the deadlock from Cody Gakpo who, before the goal had been fucking dreadful along with the rest of the Dutch attacking players. Senegal woke up and went for it but got done with Davy Klaassen scoring a second which almost certainly means that the Dutch will win the group.

25/11/22
Qatar got the second round of games under way with a match against Senegal which they of course, really had to win and to the delight of everybody outside Qatar, they lost 3-1. The first goal was hilarious as a Qatar defender controlled the ball in the area and then sat on his arse. To be fair, Qatar probably should’ve had a penalty which may well have levelled the game up for once it went 2-0 at the start of the second half, they were dead in the water, or the desert.

Senegal of course gave themselves a really good chance of making the next round especially with Netherlands and Ecuador playing out a 1-1 draw in the other game in the group. Cody Gakpo once again found the net for the Netherlands and it was the former West Ham straiker Enner Valencia who once again came to Ecuador‘s rescue. All Ecuador need to do to reach the second round is of course avoid defeat against Senegal. I would back the Dutch to record the biggest win of the tournament so far against Qatar who are officially out of their own World Cup, probably never to be seen again on the world football stage.  It’ll be interesting to see how many of their ultras turn up for it.

29/11/22
There was nothing much riding on the Netherlands v Qatar game as we all knew that the Dutch would win and it was just a case of ‘how many’.  Cody Gakpo scored for the third game in a row and a Frenkie de Jong goal meant that Man United fans would have been going to town on themselves over both goalscorers.

Senegal found themselves in front early against Ecuador but the game was decided in 5 minutes in the second half as Ecuador equalised, thus putting themselves through as it stood, but then conceded straight away, which ultimately knocked them out.  They won’t really be missed and Senegal at this stage looked the most likely opponents for England in the last 16.  Their manager used to play for Portsmouth you know…


Fuckin' Have It

Group B – England, Iran, USA, Wales

21/11/22
England against Iran is the 1 pm kick-off. England have been concentrating mainly on virtue signalling since they got out to Qatar. A training session with some migrant workers and the commitment for our captain to wear a One Love armband. FIFA then said that Kane couldn’t wear it and so we completely caved in like the pussies that we are.

To the game in Southgate picked what was for him and adventurous 4-3-3 formation which still found room for Harry Maguire and the major disappointment for me was Mason Mount starting ahead of Phil Foden. Iran came into the World Cup with the reputation of being hard to beat and hard to break down with a good defence. I don’t know what teams they have been playing to build up that reputation and to rise to 20th in the world in the FIFA world rankings but they were absolutely fucking dire. Once England went ahead and the 35th minute through Jude Bellingham, it was simply a case of how many England would get. In the end it was six with Iran replying with one Maguire assist as he dozed off and one penalty in the last minute which was absolutely hilarious. In the first half, Maguire had been wrestle-thrown to the ground without VAR getting the referee involved but in the last minute, the slightest shirt pulled by John Stones saw the referee go to the pitch-side monitor and give the penalty.

Media folk were going overboard about England being potential winners a problem for England has never been against the shite teams as we’ve always been able to beat them. Will Southgate maintain his bottle and his bravery when we play someone decent and will the defensive side of our game stand up? Jude Bellingham was the star of the show today and to have a 19-year-old with that all round game and the amount of composure playing in the centre midfield is an amazing thing. Purely in terms of putting on a performance in the first game of the tournament and beating who is in front of you, it was an excellent start for the Three Lions with the other goals by Saka (2), Sterling, Rashford and Grealish.

Next up was Wales, 1958 and all that and a game in England’s group against the USA, who are always ranked highly but are never anything much more than a very functional team who are relatively difficult to beat. USA actually play pretty well in the first half and thoroughly deserve their 1-0 lead, given to them by Timothy Weah, son of George, second cousin therefore of Ali Dia, Southampton legend.  Wales pressed the ‘big man’ button at halftime with Kiefer Moore coming on at front and his presence rattled the Americans so much that they gave away an absolutely brain-dead penalty with 10 to go, which Gareth Bale comfortably converted. It was more or less the only time that Bale kicked the ball in the right direction all game but he was hailed as a genius by the commentators in a moment of ridiculous over exaggeration. If you were going to mark Bale out of 10 for the game that you would be struggling to award more than 5 for his overall performance. However, it does give Wales a great chance for making the last 16 because you would like to think that Wales should comfortably see off Iran but stranger things have happened…. And they did…

25/11/22
Wales played Iran, no doubt buoyed by the fact that England had thrashed them so easily but this was a different Iran that showed up. Not that different however… it’s just that Wales were all kinds of shite. The big change to their game plan against the States was to play Moore from the start but if they thought Iran’s defence was going to buckle as easily as it did against England, and they were sadly mistaken and aided by some somewhat lenient refereeing, Iran got stuck in from the first whistle. It was 0-0 with 10 minutes to go until Wayne Hennessey came donkeying out of his goal like a twat and carted over to Taremi, the Iranian centre forward, and after VAR check, it was decided that wellying a forward in the head when you are last man and 40 yards from goal is a red card offence.  In the 90th minute, Iran scored after Joe Allen had given the ball away with a shit clearance and it was Allen again with the assist as he gave the ball away up the pitch which allowed Iran to break free to seal the win in the 98th minute.

The main take away from this game was that Gareth Bale is absolutely done as a top-level footballer. He can’t run anymore and that was what his game was all about. He’ll probably put on a masterclass against England in the third game but you would have to say the odds are against it. I do hope that when Wales go out of the tournament that no one from England is tempted to make a tinpot arrogant celebration video. That would never do.

Southgate picked an unchanged team and England were expected to beat the USA but England didn’t turn up and we are slightly fortunate to go in at half-time at 0-0 with Christian Pulisic having hit the bar. The second half was turgid in what turned out to be a really crap substandard game. For all of the USA’s huff and puff, they didn’t threaten Pickford’s goal at all in the second half and England didn’t do a thing either. It was a spot of redemption for Harry Maguire he was by far and away England’s best player. Luke Shaw wasn’t bad, but Southgate needs to have a good old look at the rest of them.  England never got going with the forwards players that sparkled so much against Iran, being nowhere to be seen. Saka, Sterling, Kane, Bellingham and particular Mason Mount - all shit.

There was some hope from the bench in the shape of Jack Grealish but Mason Mount stayed on the pitch for 90 minutes whilst Phil Foden watched on. I can understand Southgate picking the same team that played against Iran but there was nothing in this performance, so he has to change it against the Welsh. He said himself that those 11 players who played so well, deserve to start and there’s a case for that, but likewise, the same 11 do not deserve to start against Wales, having stunk the place out today. Mason Mount will probably still start the fucking game. 

I don’t feel that there is much tolerance of Southgate anymore.  Despite our last two tournament performances (semi-finals and runners-up) there is a feeling that he’s held us back in some way because we’ve limped out of both tournaments with a whimper, just sitting back and waiting to get beat.  A point today isn’t a bad result in the context of the group but performances like that won’t do him any favours.  We’ve played an organized hard-working team and done nothing really.

29/11/22


More Wales Goalkeeper Shenanigans

In the build-up to the game, Iran against USA threatened to turn into the political shit fest that it was always going to. There was one particularly aggressive interview by an Iranian journalist of Tyler Adams, the USA midfielder but he handled it exceptionally well. I know this has nothing to do with Qatar but it seems to be a theme of this World Cup that very young footballers are having to be politicians whilst the politicians don’t say or do much at all.

England played Wales with Wales needing a win of any kind and hoping that USA and Iran ended in a draw.  The first part of the equation of course was Wales beating England. England didn’t really have anything to fear with regards to qualification for the next round, in fact they would’ve had to have lost by 4 to give themselves a chance of being knocked out. I don’t know what the odds were but there’s never been more of a certainty than England not losing by 4 to this Wales team.  Southgate changed the team a bit with Trippier, Mount, Saka and Sterling all left out having been crap against the States and being replaced with Walker, Henderson, Foden and Rashford.

The first half saw endless England possession with Wales barely getting out of their half and it got even worse for Wales at half-time when Gareth Bale failed to emerge for the second half. Apparently, he had a tight hamstring, I mean, what is he saving himself for?  Frightened of getting injured for golf? This is Wales in the first World Cup since 1958. Not exactly going out on his shield, is he?

In the other game, the USA were winning 1-0 courtesy of a goal by the cringingly nicknamed Captain America Christian Pulisic so as it stood, they are going through in second place.

Whilst the first half was frustrating from an England point of view, with Rashford missing the one good chance of the half, he more than made up for it in the second half when England were awarded a free kick on the edge of the box and Rashford superbly conned Danny Ward in the Welsh goal into taking one step to his right as the ball flew past him to his left. Great strike, poor goalkeeping.



Foden Points the Way Forward

From the kick-off, Wales tried to keep possession but merely succeeded in giving the ball away at left back when Ben Davies was tackled by Rashford. The ball broke to Kane and he hit a superb first time cross along the ground which Foden rammed into the net on the back post. Game over. England scored a third with Rashford cutting from the right wing before smashing the ball through an embarrassing attempt to stop it by Danny Ward and the rest of the game is extremely comfortable as England brought all the fringe players on to give them some minutes and rested the likes of Kane, Rice and Shaw.

Meanwhile in the World War 3 game, despite nine minutes of injury time which must’ve given everyone the shits a little bit, USA managed to hold on to their 1-0 lead and therefore qualify in second place. The USA go onto play the Netherlands whilst England face Senegal.

Once more, there is a euphoria around England but the note of caution is that we have once more comprehensively put away a very poor team and England can always do that. Senegal will be a tougher test because they are a decent side, they play with a hell of a lot of spirit and knockout games always raise the levels because it’s do or die.  It was a good night for the manager though and Gareth Southgate got everything right from the selection at the start right on through.  England are a better side without Mount and Sterling so let’s keep it that way.

As for Wales, well ultimately it was all rather disappointing, and they finished deservedly bottom of the group without a win. This was a knockout game for them and given the ‘Do-or-Die’ options, they chose to just curl up and die.  I was amazed that they didn’t even have a go. At 2-0 they could’ve got the next goal and then who knows, but they just sat back, let in a third and then settled for getting beat 3-0.

There will surely be some players heading into international retirement and a bit of a rebuild. Gareth Bale indicated after the game that he wanted to carry on but seriously, he can’t carry on as a forward because it just looks like he simply can’t run anymore and that his legs are gone, which of course happens to everyone at some point. With his game at his prime all being about his strong running, maybe he has to reinvent himself as a defensive midfielder or something so he can still be on the pitch, still be an influence in games and to younger players and still be there for those big moments that he’s still good at - free kicks and penalties. It’s a shame when great players can’t do what they used to do but it happens to everybody but it looks like a combination of getting older, not playing for Real Madrid for the best part of three years and then playing in America, has caught up with him and in fact, he’s gone a hell of a lot further downhill since his spell Tottenham a couple years ago.


Don't Cry For Me Argentina

Group C – Argentina, Saudi Arabia, Poland, Mexico

22/11/22
Messi, Argentina, tournament favourites up against Saudi Arabia. The major first-half  surprise was Argentina only being one up due to having a couple of goals disallowed for very tight offsides. The goal they did get was courtesy of a very dubiously awarded Messi penalty when it looked like Palacios grabbed a defender and then threw himself to the floor. Having barely set foot in the Argentinian half in the first half, it was therefore amazing and bloody funny to see the Saudis be 2-1 up after the hour mark. From now on it was a case of whether Argentina could break down the massed ranks of Saudi defenders and they did fuck all really and fell to one of the most embarrassing defeats imaginable. This wasn’t funny at all.  Argentina may well recover because it’s a poor group but I’m not having some of their players when you’re talking in terms of winning the tournament.  Otamendi, Tagliafico, Di Maria to name but three.

There are certain players in the world that the media always big up as being a real top level talent but I look at them and just think they are shit. Angel DiMaria is one that I have seen play several times and though he’s played for some unbelievable clubs in Real Madrid, Manchester United and Paris Saint-Germain, I’ve only ever seen him be one footed shite and he did it again today when his country most needed him. You always in a feeling sorry for Messi because of the lesser players that he has to play with in the national team. For years It was Gonzalo Higuain who was very average and today, the much-hyped Lautaro Martinez didn’t look much good either.

The other two teams in the group served up a turd of a game - fucking awful. Mexico and Poland was notable only for Robert Lewandowski missing a penalty.  Two dull sides and that is why Argentina will probably still make it through.

26/11/22
Argentina had a must win game against Mexico and couldn’t have had more suitable opponents.  Even with that, the game was still shite until Messi speared in a shot from the edge of the box to give Argentina the lead.  He really is all they’ve got still.  Mexico didn’t get near the Argentina goal and Fernandez made it 2-0 in the last few minutes with a superb curling effort into the top corner.  Argentina will still win the group.



Gerrard Slips, Ba Scores

Poland and Saudi Arabia finally saw Poland show up for a game in a major tournament.  It wasn’t plain sailing after a very dodgy penalty was awarded against them but Al-Dawsari, the hero of their win against Argentina, saw Woijczecjieczzjk Szezczzxczzezceny save it and then the rebound, which paved the way for Robert Lewandowski to tee up Zielinski to put the Poles 1-0 up.  Poland’s main man had never scored at a World Cup so he will have been delighted when the Saudi centre back let a ball roll under his foot in Steven Gerrard style, which gave him a clear run on goal.  He didn’t miss.  I’m a huge fan of Lewandowski.  No bullshit about him and a real team player.  He does all the dirty work chasing back when Poland haven’t got the ball and is a real leader of what is basically a very average team. They’ll need a point against Argentina to go through which I can’t see them getting so anyone winning the other game will be well placed to overtake them.

30/11/22
Poland are a team who have a history of always fucking it up when it really matters and so it proved again as they were comfortably beaten 2-0 by Argentina. They weren’t helped by a scandalous referee decision to award a penalty against them (and for Messi) after a VAR check but justice was done because Messi’s was expertly turned aside by Woijczecjieczzjk Szezczzxczzezceny.  With the unmistakeable stench of corruption around this tournament, it does make you wonder if the sponsors want Messi to stay in the tournament a while longer.

All the save did was delay the inevitable though as Brighton’s Alexis MacAllister bobbled one into the net off his standing leg and Manchester City’s Julian Alvarez scored a goal that he properly intended, smashing it into the top corner.

All eyes we’re on the other game where Mexico were leading Saudi Arabia 2-0 courtesy of a tap-in and one of the best free kick goals you will ever see. As we approached the 95th minute, Mexico we’re going out to Poland courtesy of having more yellow cards and they went for it, throwing bodies forward and Saudi Arabia broke away, a quick 1-2 and pulled a goal back which basically meant that Poland squeaked through.


Mbappe - This Group is Shite

Group D – France, Denmark, Australia, Tunisia

22/11/22
Denmark and Tunisia was just fucking boring and was remarkable only for the fact that Christian Eriksen was playing in a major tournament again. Denmark looked solid as you’d expect but no cutting edge at all. 0-0

France went behind to a really well worked goal by Australia but when the French got into their stride they looked really good with goals by Rabiot, two from Giroud, deputising for the injured Benzema and one for the ridiculously talented Mbappé, making a nice easy win in the end. I hear lots of stories about Mbappé in the way behaves at PSG but the guy is a ridiculous footballer and based on what I’ve seen so far, looks the most accomplished individual player in the world at the moment. The thought of him coming up against England’s defence in the quarter-finals is not an appetising one.  It’s annoying how good France are, even without three of their biggest players in Kante, Pogba and Benzema.  Imagine England without Kane, Rice and Bellingham.

26/11/22
I have a theory with this group that France are potential winners of the World Cup and everyone else in the group is average as shite. There was no change needed to this theory in the second round of games as Australia beat Tunisia 1-0 and then France only needed to play in fits and starts to beat Denmark 2–1. It was Mbappé again who made the difference with another two goals, again showing that he is the best individual player in this tournament. I’m sure the diving fucker Ronaldo would disagree. The question is really, who comes second of this group and with Denmark left to play, my money would actually be on Australia.

30/11/22
France and three shit teams finished off the group with France putting out reserve side and losing 1-0 to Tunisia with a goal scored by Wahbi Khazri, who I remember playing for Sunderland about 10 years ago and being a complete dick. France thought they’d equalised in the last second through Antoine Griezmann but it was ruled out for offside. Basically the winners of the other game were always going to go through and Denmark, complete with their kit that “didn’t want to be noticed“, lost 1-0 to bloody Australia and finished bottom of the group and therefore, weren’t noticed themselves in this tournament.

Australia’s reward is the game against Argentina in the next round whilst Poland have to play France. I think we can safely predict how those two games are going to turn out.

Friday, July 4, 2014

World Cup 2014 Part 8 - Brazil Shits Itself and Robben Dives into Quarter Finals


Rearrange the Letters in HULK and it spells SHIT (if you change a few)
28/6/14

2nd Round – Brazil 1 Chile 1 (Brazil win 3-2 on penalties)
The knockout stages started with the host nation in a game which according to manager Scolari, they really didn’t want against Chile.  I love the way Chile approach things – they haven’t got many great individual players but they are so much more than the sum of their parts and they play as if their lives depend on it.  That said, they fell behind on 18 minutes when a cross was flicked on and was bindled into the net at the far post with David Luiz getting the credit.  There is a curious phenomena at this World Cup where the replay proves something quite different and the commentators refuse to alter their original belief.  It’s quite clearly an own goal by Jara who has stuck a leg out but no matter how many times this is shown, it’s still David Luiz’ goal and then FIFA announce that it’s Luiz’ goal.  It ultimately doesn’t matter a shit but Luiz hasn’t even got a touch there.  Against the script and therefore hugely funny was a Chile equalizer before half time. Marcelo took a throw in near his own corner flag and threw it to Hulk who had the first touch of a man wearing concrete wellies.  Aranguiz nicks in and passes infield to Sanchez who, being unmarked as he is, fires it past Cesar and into the far corner.  Great finish but shocking play from Brazil.  Much has been said about bent refereeing favouring the host nation but Howard Webb hasn’t read the script as a long cross picks out Hulk who controls around the shoulder area and mis-hits it into the net off his knee.  It looks perfectly ok and then gets disallowed for handball.  It’s marginal to say the least but fair play to Webb, he believes he’s right and disallows it and shows a yellow card to Hulk.  Scolari is going beserk and you just know that Webb is on his way home now.  Personally I think it’s a harsh decision and if Chile had had a goal disallowed like that then we’d all have been going nuts.  The problem with Brazil is that they have some right shit payers and they keep the quota the same by removing Fred and bringing on Jo who is slightly more mobile but still shite.  Hulk is their most likely forward to score but he mixes up great runs with throwing himself on the ground.  Extra time passes and Brazil collectively shites its pants and Panilla smacks the bar from 25 yards on 119 minutes and we have our first penalty shootout.

The penalty shootout is an average affair and it’s 3-2 to Brazil as Gonzalo Jara takes the fifth Chilean penalty and hits the inside of the post and Brazil are through – just.  Needless to say, Hulk missed.

2nd Round – Colombia 2 Uruguay 0
Before this game we get word that Luis Suarez has made a statement and it’s that he slipped and kept his balance only by plunging his teeth into the shoulder of Chiellini.  This is about as hilarious as when an MP says that he slipped and fell into that rent boy.  By showing no remorse and no admission that anything was wrong, he should really be slapped with a longer ban whch of course, won’t happen.  To the game itself and Colombia are the better side throughout and a new global star is born as James Rodriguez controls a high ball on his chest with his back to goal, chests is sideways in the same movement and volleys it left footed in off the bar.  It’s a ridiculous goal and put the Colombians 1-0 u after half an hour.  It’s 2-0 straight after half time as the Uruguayans are carved open and Cuadrado cushioned a header back for Rodriguez to score again.  Cuadrado seems to be a very influential player and he’s got nifty dance move as all the Colombians do their thang corner flag.  Ospina made a couple of saves as Uruguay belatedly went for it but Uruguay and their fans with their Suarez masks are gone.  Colombia will be a major threat to Brazil in the quarter finals.


How to Make Sure the Ref Gives It
29/6/14

2nd Round – Netherlands 2 Mexico 1
The first half of this was interesting without ever really catching fire, unlike anyone who was in the stadium as the temperatures were ridiculous – so much so that we had the first ‘cooling break’ of the tournament after half an hour which gives FIFA delegates a chance to do some spread betting.  Mexico looked the better side but in truth, neither really looked like scoring though the Dutch should have had a penalty when Robben was hacked over twice in one move but not given.  The Mexicans went 1-0 up straight after half time as the ‘useless at Spurs’ Giovani dos Santos lashed in a shot from 30 yards which gave the keeper no chance and sent his manager pogoing round the technical area in celebration.  Mexican keeper Ochoa came into his own at that point and made a series of saves, mainly good reaction stops to efforts fired straight at him.  The best of which was an instinctive block from a close range de Vrij volley which bounced off his hands, onto the post and away.  The second cooling break sw van Gall replace van Persie with Huntelaar which basically heralded a change of tactic to ‘long diagonal ball’.  It worked though with 2 minutes to go as Huntelaaar headed down a cross at the far post and Schnijder, despite being invisible all tournament, fired brilliantly into the bottom corner from 20 yards showing that the keeper is beatable if you stop shooting straight at him.  Extra-time here we come but a last Dutch attack saw them feed Robben who attacked the box, skipped past one lunge and then went down under a tired hack from Marquez.  Has he touched him? yes, is it a dive? yes, should it have been a penalty? In my opinion yes.  Up stepped Huntelaar, 2-1 and we get to hear Chiles calling him van Huntelaar in the post match shambles but the Netherlands march on and the Mexican manager Herrera throws a colossal wobbler but what a legend he has been.

2nd Round – Costa Rica 1 Greece 1 (Costa Rica win 5-4 on penalties)
Let’s face it, the first half was shit as it always seems to be when Greece are playing and they should have taken the lead on half time as Salpingidis met a superb cross from the left on the full and Navas deflected it wide with his foot.  Five mintes after half time it was the Costa Ricans who took the lead as Fulham reject Bryan Ruiz sidefooted home beautifully from the edge of the box and everyone just watch it rll in.  The should have had a penalty as well for a clear handball a bit later but they handed Greece a lifeline when Duarte lunged in and was sent off for a second yellow. Greece are hardly known for their skills in chasing the game but they now have a chance which they took until the 91st minute to take as Papasthatopoulos rammed home a rebound.  Extra time and the ten men were now clear 2nd favourites and Greece had the best chances extra time but it was penalties again.  The Greek manager managed to get himself sent to the stands at this point and there were 7 successful spot kicks with neither keeper getting near any of them until, with Costa Rica leading 4-3, Navas superbly saved Gekas’ kick and Umana casually stroked home the winner.  Costa Rica in the last 8 and the only team they’ve played who they didn’t beat… bloody England.


Keeper Legend
30/6/14

2nd Round – France 2 Nigeria 0
The biggest surprise of the World Cup is not Costa Rica making the last 8 – it’s been that France haven’t had to send a player home yet.  Nigeria on the face of it should cause them any problems but they do and have the ball in the net as Emunike slides it past Lloris only for a very tight (but correct) offside flag to deny the Africans.  France are playing some decent stuff though and it’s amusing that Paul Pogba is at the centre of it.  This is the guy that Man United had but never gave him a chance and so he left.  Now he’s one of the best central midfielders in Europe and United have Tom Cleverley.  Pogba drives forward and sets up Valbuena who picks him out with the cross but Pogba’s volley is spectacularly kept out by Enyeama.  The seond half sees Nigeria looking like the better side but France creating the chances.  Benzema plays a quick 1-2 to get free and his shot is half blocked by Enyeama and then hacked off the line by Moses then following a corner, the ball finds its way out to Cabaye on the egge of the box and his angled volley hits the bar on the far side with the keeper nowhere.  Enyeama had been having a great game for Nigeria but he handed the game to France on the 80th minute when he came for a cross, got nowhere near catching it and just flapped it up in the air for Pogba to head into the empty net.  In the last minute, a Valbuena cross was deflected into his own net by Yobo to confirm French passage into the next round to play the winners of ze Germans and Algeria.  For me, the French are still a good bet to win it – they seem solid all over the pitch and don;t have any obvious weaknesses.

2nd Round – Germany 2 Algeria 1 (after extra time)
Joachim Low seems to have a strange compulsion to play players out of position.  The have centre backs at full back on both sides and Philip Lahm who is one of the best  in the World in either full back position, playing in midfield.  Germany are basically very lethargic and not very good.  Most of their play goes through Mesut Ozil who then gives the ball away.  Algeria look dangerous on their forays forward with Neuer often having to race from his line to compensate for a ponderous back 4.  He’s out and making a superb sliding tackle on Slimani which could easily have resulted in a goal or a red card.  Slimani has the ball in the net as he slides in a Musa cross but he’s offside.  Ze Germans are having chances though and the excellent Rais MBohli pulls of an excellent double save from Mario Gotze.  The bloody keeper is at it again when he somehow blocks a point blank header from Thomas Muller and then is up to smother the rebound from Schurrle.  The reason I say ‘bloody’ keeper is because I have Germany to win in 90 minutes as part of an accumulator.  It goes against every fibre of my being to want ze Germans to win and typically, they are messing me about.  The keeper makes a wonderful finger tip save from Lahm and the 90 minutes are up, the bets are screwed and now I can support Algeria.  As soon as extra time starts they concede a goal as Muller gets down the left, crosses behind Schurrle who manages to drag a leg and flick it into the net past MBohli – could have done that a minute earlier you git.  It’s soon 2-0 as Ozil passes the ball in the right direction to Schurrle.  His shot is blocked by a defender and the rebound falls kindly for Ozil to smash it in the net.  Algeria give it a spirited response and pull one back with a minute to do as Fegouli (who has what looks like a maxi-pad taped to his head) crosses and Djabou rams it into the net on the volley.  Too little too late though and the very average Germans are through to play France.  Algeria go out with their head held high having given it a real go in almost exactly the same way as England didn’t.


I know who you learnt that shit celebration off of
1/7/14

2nd Round – Argentina 1 Switzerland 0 (after extra time)
I’ve kind of been ignoring Argentina in this World Cup so far as they’ve progressed through a pretty easy group.  Excellent attack, good midfield, dodgy defence.  They surely would have too much for Switzerland but the Swiss have the best chances of the first half as Xhaka hits one from the edge of the box which requires a decent stop from Romero, who then saves the shot from the rebound for good measure.  The keeper gets lucky before half time as Shaquiri plays Drmic though and Romero comes, then stops, then goes back and Drmic made a right balls of it and his attempted chip landed in the keepers arms. Argentina wake up after half time with Higuain having a header tipped over by Benaglio and Messi teeing himself up for a volley from the edge of the box which narrowly clears the bar.  Messi is of course the main threat and some quality dribbling in the box sees him find a yard and fire for the bottom corner but again, Benaglio gets down well to save.  It’s all Argentina at the start of extra time and Benaglio is there again to superbly deny di Maria who is shooting on sight virtually every time he gets the ball.  Its 2 minutes to penalties when Messi picks it up on halfway, skips away from a tackle and slides it right to di Maria who passes it into the far corner of the net.  Great finish and Switzerland are done.... or are they.  Time is up as a cross is swung over, Dzemaili gets his hed to it and it thumps off the base of the post, rebounds back, hits Dzemaili on the knee and trickles wide.  Argentina through but not particularly convincing.

2nd Round – Belgium 2 USA 1 (after extra time)
Belgium have had enough of Lukaku and dropped him with Devock Origi taking his place.  He has the first shot after 30 seconds and Tim Howard saves it – and so the pattern of this match is established.  The match sees better quality from the Belgians in the face of great spirit by the Diving German’s Yanks but Howard makes save after save after save from Origi, Mirallas and Kompany.  In nearly all cases though, it’s poor finishing and Howard would have been mortified if any of those had beaten him.  The Yanks have a great chance to win it as Dempsey heads down int he box and Waldalowski blazes wide from 5 yards.  It’’s a shocking miss but hte lino has flagged which is odd and he was about 3 yards onside.  0-0 at full time and so we’re on extra time patrol again and like the German game the other night, a goal is soon coming as Lukaku bulldozes down the right, cuts in and pulls it back to de Bruyne who takes a touch, turns and lashes past Howard.  It looks like it’s all over before the first half of extra time is up as another Belgian break ends up with de Bruyne on the left and his pass is perfect for Lukaku to sweep it into the net for 2-0.  From looking dead on the ir feet though, the Yanks rally in the last 15 minutes, get a goal back through a mis-hit volley from Green and then pen Belgium back.  Jones fired narrowly wide and the n a cleverly worked free kick saw the ball break to Dempsey but his te poke was smothered by the onrushing Courtois.  2-1 in the end but a massive effort from the USA who went down with all guns blazing.  How said it is that I’m thinking that England would have little chance against America.  Coach Jurgen is still a massive, massive helmet though.  Belgium through to play Argentina and fair play to them.

For me, the pick of the quarter finals is Brazil v Colombia.  If the referee is fair then I see Colombia winning it to be honest, probably after extra time as I can’t see Brazil dealing with Cuadrado and James Rodriguez. I’m going for France against Germany in what will probably be a dour affair, Netherlands against Costa Rica where the Costa Rica bubble will burst and Argentina against Belgium after extra time.  I never win my accumulators so ignore me.