Premier League Match 20 - Southampton 0 Brentford 5

 

The Next Saints / Sport Republic Board Meeting Should be Fun

At the dawning of a New Year it’s pretty common to hear people saying “New Year new me” and other such bollocks, pertaining to the fact that the new year is somehow miraculously going to be different to the old year just because the year number has increased by one. The fact remains that it only happens if you make it happen.

Sport Republic have a transfer window to try and make it happen and the first few days of it, has seen mixed signals at best coming out of St Mary’s. Firstly, the new manager Ivan Juric made reference to the fact that he and the board weren’t going to have a meeting until next week to decide upon any potential incoming transfers. That was a bit of a clunker to say the least – nothing like being prepared lads.  Some things did happen now, with Ronnie Edwards going out on loan to QPR and there were recalls from loans for Dominic Ballard and Cameron Bragg, neither of whom are going to make much difference to our first team this season.  There has been one arrival, with Welington joining from São Paulo.  He is a left back with over 150 games under his belt for the Brazilian top-level side. The fact that he was joining and this was all signed and sealed long time ago was missed by most media outlets who started linking Saints with various left backs as soon as the silly season started.

There have been a few rumours, about some players leaving, amongst them Charlie Taylor and Ben Brereton Diaz who in both cases, only joined in the summer which certainly points at an admission from the club that the recruitment in the summer was shit in the main.  Add Maxwel Cornet to that list as well as noises are being made about his loan being cancelled and him going back to West Ham.

Brentford are in town today and it’s another game against the club who we should be trying to emulate, establishing themselves in the top division and doing reasonably well. As it stands Brentford are on to finish in a kind of lower mid-table position but are certainly much better than the current bottom six. Most of their points are gathered at home, to such a degree that they haven’t won away from home this season. Needless to say, this should be a great opportunity for us to actually win a game of fucking football.

Anyone thinking this will be easy however is in for a bit bit of a shock. When you look at the Brentford front line of Mbeumo, Wissa and Schade, it is certainly enough to keep our defence busy. My current mode of thinking about us is that it’s not the defence that is the problem, as much as finding a way to score goals. Maybe Tall Paul will be the man today but he’s going to have to do it without the supply from Mateus Fernandes, who is suspended having picked up his fifth booking last week at Crystal Palace, for winning a header cleanly against short player who didn’t jump.

Team news and a bad feeling straight away.  Jimmy Championship is at right wing back and it looks like Joe Aribo has once again been included in the centre of midfield, this time alongside Big Les. The biggest WTF is that Juric has seen enough from Sulemana in his last two non-entity substitute appearances to put him in the team from the start today.  Try though I might, I’m not confident at all that Brentford’s poor away record will mean more than our shite looking line-up.

Away we go and it soon becomes apparent that the tactics are to go man-for-man all over the pitch. Now, I’m not a professional football coach but I know that that is fucking mental with our players against Brentford's.  They are fitter and more athletic and it’s football suicide.  The other thing that I know is fucking suicidal, is our central midfield and that takes all of five minutes to manifest itself as the ball gets played up to Aribo, who takes a horrendous touch and loses the ball. Big Les has to leave his man marking assignment to try and clear up and he half arses it and misses the ball, which of course goes to Les’ man Damsgaard, who then splits the gap between THB and Jimmy Championship and Schade runs to finish first time past a helpless Ramsdale. Fucking wankers honestly. Great job everybody.

Joe Man Marking.  Yes, He's Supposed to Be The Other Side

Another Brentford attack and they absolutely piss through our midfield and it’s Mbeumo playing the ball through to Wissa and his shot is well blocked by Ramsdale and we clear eventually but not for long, because KWP slips on his arse and has to drag down Mbeumo, which is a yellow card and a free kick near the corner of the penalty area. The free kick. comes in and he met by the totally unmarked Norgaard, who flicks a header off onto the crossbar and away. We are so fucking shit it’s unbelievable. Norgaard of course shouldn’t be unmarked but Aribo has decided to go with vibes rather than actually tracking his man.  It's shambles and looks like the Spurs game.

We haven't had a shot yet because no one is prepared to take reponsibility, so fair play to Sulemana who responds to the crowd and has a pop, sailing into Row Z and sending people scattering high up in the Chapel.  Ooooooooooh, go about five people sarcastically. We eventually create a chance as the first half draws to close, when KWP scoops a cross over and there is a bit of tennis at the back post by Jimmy Championship and Tall Paul flicks a header at it but it’s easily picked up by Flekken.

Our brief flurry continues and Jimmy League One finds Aribo on the byeline and somehow he takes on a man and beats him before laying it back to Dibling on the edge of the box and he works onto his left foot and pings it into he side netting.

Half time and that was dog shit but somehow we are still in the game. Juric has obviously seen something he doesn’t like though as Jimmy League Two is off to be replaced by Sugawara and Nathan Wood, who has been struggling with all game with his man-marking job on Mbeumo, is replaced with Charlie Taylor, who slots in on the left of the back three.

The second off starts off in shit fashion with Brentford passing the ball around the top of the penalty area before working it wide to Roerslev on the right, who smashes it at Ramsdale, who manages to push it out for a corner. We clear the corner as far as Damsgaard, who plays a simple 1-2 with Mbeumo to completely lose his marker and now has acres of space to slide the ball into Wissa, whose effort is blocked wide by THB.  It’s just so fucking easy and inevitable that they're going to score again.... and another corner swings in and there’s Van den berg, rising all on his own to head the ball into the net. For fuck sake. Bednarek is not happy as he ended up on the deck and we are off to VAR

Hi Stockley Park – I’ve let Brentford celebrate for five minutes so I guess we’d better check it

Why bother, it’s a goal against Southampton?

Yeah, but we’d better have a look to keep up appearances

OK, checking for a foul… got it – Wissa has his arms around Bednarek, who has dived on the ground.  I’d go with the on field decision and give it.  Sending you to the screen

[Ref has a look on screen] Tell you what lads.  I’m going to disallow it for the greater good

What?

Well Southampton never get given anything off VAR, so lets give them this one so that they can’t complain… and it won’t matter because they’re shit and they’re going to lose anyway.

Fair enough mate.  Howard's here, he like it.  Genius thinking.

Fucking hell, we won one. I wonder if this will make any difference? I wonder if we will take advantage of it? There is a replay on the big screen and that is soft as fuck.

Ivan has had enough of the Rasmus January 2023 Transfer window boys and Tall Paul and Sulemana are off to be replaced with Archer and Armstrong.  Immediately, there’s a little bit of life in our attack for a couple of minutes until KWP has an effort blocked and Brentford break away, Van den berg sends it long, Schade flicks on and Wissa is clean through and as Ramsdale comes out, he totally shits himself and blasts it into the Chapel. I mean, that is shit. I can't be bothered to laugh at it really because however shit it was, we are worse.

We make the most of another let off by giving the ball away in midfield as THB and Big Les seem to get in each other’s way and Mbeumo sends Wissa away and he holds it up long enough for Mbeumo to get outside him, a simple reverse pass and Mbeumo lashes it into the top of the net from a narrow angle. Pathetic. Game over.  I realise I’m only being bitter about this because we never score, but how fucking long does it take them to celebrate a goal?

Mbeumo Shoots Past an Unprotected Ramsdale From Six Yards

Half an hour to go and Brentford’s next attack sees Mbeumo pick up the ball on the right and once again it’s a simple 1-2 and he absolutely blasts the ball at Ramsdale, unopposed from 6 yards and the keeper blocks again.  It’s now Taylor‘s job to be man-to-man on Mbeumo and that’s not fucking working as he swings over a left footed cross And Van den Berg is wrestled to the ground by Big Les and that’s a fucking penalty, isn’t it? They used to have Ivan Toney taking their penalties and always scoring but now they’ve got Mbeumo and he casually strikes into the net, even though Ramsdale goes the right way.

Lewis-Potter Shoots Past an Unprotected Ramsdale From Six Yards

Our response is to do nothing and allow left back Lewis-Potter a free shot at Ramsdale but luckily for us, he puts it wide.  Dibling has a token effort from 30 yards which skims just wide to the post, but at least it was an effort before Brentford sub Meghoma (not Jaden) runs through three players before feeding Mbeumo on the right and he easily picks out Lewis-Potter who has made his way into the box again completely unopposed by our right back and he easily slots across Ramsdale for four.

It’s just fucking embarrassing now as we wait for the final whistle but Brentford don’t, as they keep attacking. THB shanks a clearance into midfield and then as Brentford give us it back, Sugawara gets involved and there’s no communication between him and THB and the right back’s shit header puts Wissa away and clean through and he finishes with ease as well. It’s just fucking embarrassing.  The end and there’s barely any Saints fans left in the ground to witness it.  Shite.

Wissa Shoots Past an Unprotected Ramsdale From Six Yards

Well, where do we start with that? Wankers on the pitch – wankers everywhere.  Actually, let’s start with the man who is rapidly becoming the latest shit appointment by Sport Republic.  The team selection and tactical set up today was absolutely atrocious. It’s basically a two-man central midfield, which you cannot play with Joe Aribo being one of the two because of all the things we all know about. He can’t run, he’s not a great tackler, he doesn’t have defensive awareness and he’s a passenger.   The Man-to-man marking set up therefore completely goes to shit because Joe loses his man, Lesley Ugochukwu has to come over and so his man is spare and so basically there is no defensive shield for the back three whatsoever, who are always going to struggle in that scenario.  All entirely predictable from the moment the eleven names were announced at the start. I know we don’t have a plethora of midfield options but Adam Lallana is on the bench until the 90th minute, when we desperately needed a proper midfield three out there.  Dibling had instruction to get close to Jensen at the start of the game, but eventually Brentford completely took over in midfield and Damsgaard in particular was allowed to do whatever he wanted.  Aribo was shit, Big Les was shit.  They both played a part in the first goal and Les dozed off to give away the penalty for the third.  After a decent opening couple of games for Juric, this was a major relapse for him.

Ivan Illustrates How Wide Apart Our Midfield Is

In a day when a lot of people seem to turn on Sport Republic on their second anniversary, we got to see the fruit of the Rasmus January 2023 transfer window today with a front line of Tall Paul and Sulemana. Paul didn’t have much service but was mainly dreadful and Sulemana had a couple of moments but otherwise look like he always does, like a nine-year-old playing a game of men’s football. He doesn’t make runs when he should. He doesn’t want the ball and there’s never any product at all. He seems to specialise in making the odd decoy run but then one of our other players usually makes the mistake of actually given him the ball.

James Bree was selected at right back and he is a League 1 standard player. He wasn’t good enough for us in the Championship last year so why is he starting a Premier League game? The answer to that question is probably that Yuki Sugawara is the alternative and he didn’t play for much today but he did give away the fifth goal.  KWP is of course our best full-back but he didn’t look particularly interested in the first half especially. The player signed to be our left back this season, Charlie Taylor, came on at half-time to play on the left of back three and he can’t really be blamed for being shocking, given that he was his first game for quite a long time. To throw him on and expect him to pick up Bryan Mbeumo was always going to end in disaster.  Bednarek kept at it all game but THB had a mare on two, possibly three of the goals.  At least he tries though.

That brings us to the forwards that we haven’t mentioned yet, Adam Armstrong and Cameron Archer, who are both shit. A little bit of effort when they first came onto the pitch hinted at better things but after the second goal went in they totally gave up and didn’t give Dibling any support whatsoever.  People get annoyed at Tyler for losing the ball but honestly, he breaks away down the right-hand side and there’s no fucker anywhere near him. Armstrong and Archer were hiding on the left behind the play, and not trying to support him in exactly the same way that Sulemana didn’t make runs to support him in the first half. That’s all we’ve got, our way to goal is to expect an 18 year-old to beat half a team and do it all on his own. Fucking pathetic.  We have much bigger issues than Tyler occasionally holding onto the ball for too long.

The only player who I’d really excuse is Aaron Ramsdale who made it a few decent saves to keep the score down, usually when the rest of the team had allowed Brentford to blast the fucking ball at him from about six yards.  He now knows what being the coconut in a coconut shy feels like.  If I was him, I would be severely tempted to break another finger, so I didn’t have to play, behind this absolute shit show for the next four months.

Coconut Shy

There’s not one of our outfield players that would get into Brentford starting XI and a number of them wouldn’t even get in Brentford’s reserves. They were everything, that we weren’t and better than us in every single facet that makes up a successful football team. They all knew what they were doing, they won all the one-to-one challenges, they picked up all the second balls, they passed the ball with purpose, they closed down and they did all the basics. Thomas Frank – one of the best managers in the Premier League.

The first half was pretty bad and the second half rivalled the Spurs first half for how shit it was.  I have issue with Ivan Juric over the first half. We are supposed to be this team that presses the opposition so how do you explain Brentford goalkeeper Flekken, standing on the edge of his own penalty area with the ball let his feet for about 10 or 15 seconds with no one going to him. We were already one down at this stage and that is fucking embarrassing. The reason Sulemana and Tall Paul did not go to close him down because they didn’t want to give him an easy ball out to the full-back, but instead of that he waited and then passed the ball straight through our midfield to a Brentford striker, because the whole team was stood around like a bunch of fucking statues. Humiliating and inept.

Penny for the thoughts of Dragon Solak.  If I had invested as much money as he had, I would be pretty pissed off with getting relegated in my first full season and having the asset turnover go to shit.  I might have given the people who worked for me the chance to put that right in the Championship but having got back to the Premier League, I would be expecting a hell of a lot better this time around. There must be a part of him that is thinking that the arm of Sport Republic looking after the football side are a fucking shit show.  The lack of knowledge on the board is really coming back to bite us and with every passing game I am questioning this managerial appointment and who made it?  It might have been Ankersen but he's in Turkey with Goztepe.  It might have been Parsons but his area of expertise is the commercial side.  It might have been Bitcon but he's more of a sports performance kind of guy.  Who's the guy who knows what it takes to have a functioning Premier League team?  Let’s face it, Juric would not have been appointed if Jason Wilcox was still the Director of Football, because Juric’s style goes against everything that he was about. With every passing game, this is looking more like a Nathan Jones data driven appointment. It’s almost like someone at Sport Republic couldn’t accept that it didn’t work last time and wanted to have another go at it.  Attention is very much on them now with Russell Martin gone and therefore not picking up all the blame and ridicule any more.

I have given up on any prospect of us staying up this season of course, but I just want us to have a couple of decent 90 minute performances between now and the end of the season and be competitive in games and get more than 11 points. We have stopped being competitive recently, and three out of our last four home games have seen us ship five goals. The only one that didn’t see that was the false dawn against West Ham when we managed to lose 1-0 to a team who is subsequently been battered in every game they have played since.  It is considerably worse than the relegation season of two years ago and that was abysmal.

Next week is a pointless game in the FA Cup against Swansea at home.  It’s pointless for everyone except Ivan Juric, who really has to win it.  I do hope no one is thinking they‘d take an FA Cup win and getting relegated.  If you are – don’t be a silly bollocks.

Up the fucking Saints.

Premier League Match 3 - Brentford 3 Southampton 1

Standard Start to Life as a Saints Goalkeeper

Brentford away at the Gtech Community Shit Corporate Name Stadium.  Apart from the shit corporate name, there is a lot to admire about Brentford and the way they have performed in the last few seasons, firstly making the Premier League and then thriving in it under the expert management of Thomas Frank.

No matter how much I try there is nothing to dislike about Frank.  Last year he had to deal with the Ivan Toney situation with his gambling ban but he kind of shrugged off the loss of his most home high-profile player and guided Brentford to safety, relatively comfortably. This year they have started with a win at home to Palace and a defeat at Liverpool, both without their talisman striker who has now decided to commit career suicide and disappear off to Saudi Arabia.  I have no idea who he has signed for and I couldn't give a shit and nor could he.  It’s a sad state of affairs when players in their prime decide to take the money and run. Most Brentford fans are happy to see him go because the saga has been all anyone has talked about for the last year or so.

So, let's stop talking about it.  The actual Brentford team is worthy of discussion with Johan Wissa, Kevin Schade and Bryan Mbuemo being very dangerous strikers. I’ve always been impressed by Christian Nørgaard in midfield and though they appear to have four central defenders at the back with no full backs - the reason for that is the long-term injuries that have befallen Aaron Hickey and Rico Henry. Yes, Thomas  Frank has certainly had a lot to deal with and has still managed to keep Brentford‘s head above water. There is an alternative universe starting 18 months ago where sport Republic appointed their former Brentford manager to take over at Saints when Ralph Hassenhuttl left. Instead of that, we went down a different route and we are only just recovering.

To that end, the transfer window closed the day before the game and we quite ridiculously managed to add Aaron Ramsdale as a permanent signing. I don’t think it’s really sunk in yet just how huge this is for a club of our size with the Premier League being as it is these days. 12 months ago he was Arsenal‘s first choice goalkeeper as they finished second in the league and was second choice for England and putting as much pressure on Jordan Pickford's status is England number one as anyone else has done over the past few years. Mikel Arteta had other ideas though and Rambo become second choice to former Brentford keeper David Raya and here we are. We have been the beneficiaries of Arteta's hard-nosed decision which got him no further up the league.

Also through the door at the end of the window, late into the night when everyone had gone to bed, was Maxwel Cornet on loan for the season from West Ham. We have taken a bit of a gamble here because he’s basically not been fit for the last year and a half and has not done anything at West Ham since he moved from Burnley.  He really isn’t going to find it easy to get into the team. Whilst Cornet was a punt from left-field, we also had the feelgood story of Ryan Fraser signing on a free transfer. The Wee man is back and his popularity is there for all to see. He too will find it hard to get in the team but we are certainly struggling less with winger today than we were yesterday.

On that score, one of our struggling wingers, Sam Edozie was rumoured to be joining Rangers on loan for the season but for whatever reason, it didn’t happen.  Would it be rude to suggest that it looked like it was going to work and he couldn't make his mind up and there was no end product.  As I write, ABK and Tall Paul are still here, as is Kamaldeen Sulemana. It’s hard to see any of those players getting anywhere near a Premier League squad this season.

We have ended the transfer window with about 29 players who could reasonably expect to be in the first team squad. It’s too many but with the Turkish and Saudi transfer windows still open, we could see some more outgoings in the next few weeks.

To today and team news and a very loud "meh" from me.  Ramsdale makes his debut but other than that there is no changes.  Same formation and no one that impressed against Cardiff made the side - so no Archer, Fernandes, Dibling, Ugochukwu etc.  Best we can hope for is that Armstrong and Brereton Diaz have slightly less than the 50 yards between them today.

One thing that surprised me about the Ramsdale deal is why he would want to play behind the defence that is going to give him absolutely shit loads to do. I guess it’s a chance to look impressive. That comes to fruition within two minutes of the kickoff as Damsgaard puts in a dangerous cross from the right, which dissects our defenders and Mbuemo is bearing down on goal but Ramsdale is off his line really quickly to block. Brilliant start to the new man.

When we stop panicking, we make good ground of the right and KWP bears down on goal from a narrow angle. As we all know, KWP is our main goal threat in this formation and his shot his blocked by the foot of Flekken.  Smallbone swings over the corner and Aribo must score as has the simplest of jobs nod it into the net… but he gets in too early and the ball is just behind him, meaning he still gets something on it and it loops over the keeper towards the back post, hits the bar and drops down. There are half arsed appeals for a penalty but no chance.

Brentford look very dangerous on the break whenever we give them the opportunity and Mbuemo gets through again but he’s put off by Ramsdale and the ball runs away for THB to hack it clear. Next attack for Brentford and Wissa pulls some sort of freestyle turn out of his locker on the edge of the box before hammering in a shot which Ramsdale catches dismissively.

One difference to previous games is that Saints do actually look threatening when they go forward. A Brereton Diaz flick puts Aribo away down the left and his low cross into the box is cleared for a corner. Smallbone takes time off from running in treacle to put over a decent corner and it’s a free header for Jack Stephens a few yards out but he nods it over the bar with no fuss.

The 50 yard gap between our strikers is not there this week. BBD is still mainly playing wide left but Arma is in the middle and that nearly pays dividends as Aribo sends BBD gallivanting forward from the halfway line and he puts Arma in behind the defence but there’s absolutely no conviction and in the end, despite being ahead in the race, he doesn’t manage to get in a shot and Pinnock and Ajer combined to let the ball run through to the goalkeeper. And if you were being cynical you would say there was a chance to go down when Pinnock lunged in but not taken.

We haven’t had a fuck up as yet but KWP gets too close to Aribo and presents the ball to Damsgaard about 30 yards out and he races forward and tries to square it but THB gets across and gets a toe on it to knock it back to Ramsdale. Fist pumps all round and great defending in the end.

Ramsdale gives it short to Bednarek who takes a couple strides forward before passing forwards to Stephens, taking Schade and Wissa out of the game. Stephens plays it straight back to THB, just bringing the two Brentford forwards back into the game and closing THB down aggressively. THB should of course put his fucking foot through it but freezes in the headlights and loses it. Schade takes it on and smashes an effort against the near post and the rebound falls kindly to Mbuemo to run into the net. Fucking hell.

Saints respond and win a corner and when it’s headed out, because of course it hits the first man, Sugawara let’s fly from the edge of the box but it straight down Flekken’s throat. Saints have some urgency about them now and Downes wins the ball high up before finding Sugawara on the right. His cross deflects perfectly and it lands four yards out straight to Adam Armstrong and all he has to do is side foot it into the net but no, big lash, misses it, hits his standing leg and bounces the wrong way. Fuck me

Half-time and Russell Martin has clearly seen what I have seen and Smallbone and Adam Armstrong are both off. Smallbone has dropped a solid 2 out of 10 performance in midfield, demonstrating treacle running whenever possible and generally not being involved because, you know, Premier League level athleticism and all that. Adam Armstrong has had two good chances to score and failed twice. It’s not just the fact that he’s failed but how badly he has failed, not getting a shot in twice. On come Fernandes and Archer.

The new boys are in on the action straight away with Fernandes turning on the edge of his own penalty area and driving up to the halfway line before sending BBD away on the left. He takes the ball back and tries to slot Archer through and it’s a brilliant effort just a couple of feet in front of him allowing Flekken to pick it up. It’s significant because there is more attacking invention in that move then we have seen in 2 1/2 league games so far.

As we approach the hour mark, Russell Martin again goes for it with Tyler Dibling coming on to replace THB. One of the central defenders had to come off but personally I feel that the captain should’ve been looked at.  It’s still fairly even. Mbuemo has a shot blocked our end before BBD has one the deflect from the corner that we waste, of course.

And then it happens again. Stephens and Bednarek try to knock the ball around with KWP and both of them go for the return pass with Bednarek trying to flick it to Stephens who is right next to him. Needless to say that doesn’t end well then by the time I open my eyes again, Mbuemo has stuck it in the net. Fucking hell what’s the point?

The game is over now because there is absolutely no way we are scoring two, but regardless, Dibling begins to make his mark down the right hand side dribbling in from the wing before hitting it with his left foot, forcing Flecken to parry it away to the offside Sugawara who lashes it over the bar anyway.

Brentford‘s next attack wins a throw over in the left-hand corner and it’s launched in towards all the 6 foot 6 central defenders they’ve got, flicked on and there is Wissa to bundle the ball and Ramsdale into the net. No question of it being a foul and that’s a hat-trick of absolutely fucking shit goes we’ve let in.

Lallana is on for Aribo and much to the annoyance of the contingent who are still determined to give him a hard time over what happened 10 years ago, he is again in a completely different level of class. With him, Dibling and Fernandes on the pitch we certainly have three more players who can all play at Premier League level. Lallana is immediately involved twice in the move that sees a Fernandes effort blocked by the keeper at close range.

As we approach 89 it’s now the Tyler Dibling show as he skips past players for fun before lending the ball to Lallana and getting it back. Superb vision to chip it over the defence to pick up Lallana’s run, nodded down and Sugawara crashes it into the net with the outside of his left foot. Absolutely brilliant goal. Pointless in the context of this game but at least we have our first goal of the season.

The end and sigh! That will possibly be the easiest win Brentford will have all year. They didn’t actually have to do anything to win that game other than press our defenders and wait for them to fuck up.  All three goals we conceded were absolute jokes.  For the first one, Stephens chose to go back to THB which is the first mistake because it should never have gone back to him. The second mistake is that THB didn’t put his foot through it and instead, lost the ball and there you have it.  THB really struggled at the back. There was some good play, bailing KWP out the shit exactly two minutes before coughing up the first goal. As I said before though, it’s far too easy to put all the blame on THB for that goal. You really have to look at who put him in the shit in the first place. THB will get there in the end but at the moment the learning curve is very steep.  Personally I feel that he needs to be playing regularly in a back four to have the best chance of reaching his potential. 

For the second goal, Bednarek and Stephens both go for the same ball and then Jan tries a deft little flick in the centre of the defence which gives the ball away and we let in another goal. That’s the sort of flick that a number 10 would play to flick the ball through to a striker and it’s an absolute fucking joke to try and do it on the edge of your own penalty area. This shows how much the pace and the pressure in the Premier League gets to players when a 60 cap Polish international makes a mistake and a decision like that.  The third goal was shit defending from a long throw. Okay, that can happen against Brentford because of the height they’ve got in their team but it’s another poor goal. So, three gifts and you aren’t gonna win any games if you do that, especially when you’re as average and blunt in attack as we are.

So, three shit goals conceded by our previously pretty reliable defence. What of our previously failing attack? In the first half we had chances to be fair but Adam Armstrong just illustrated again that he’s not good enough when it comes down to it in the Premier League. He had two 'attempts'  in the first half, which ended with not having any conviction when running through for the first one and then playing an air shot 6 yards out when any connection would’ve been a goal. At least he was in the middle today and had a couple of opportunities, and not out on the right wing. Ben Brereton Diaz stuck to his brief on the left hand side and basically did fuck all and he has not done enough to convince anyone as yet.

What Ben did do in the first half was occupy the space that KWP should’ve been running into from left wing back. KWP was instead though, being the third centre half because Jack Stephens was loafing about in midfield and getting in the way.  This is one of many things that we did today that is simply not going to wash at Premier League level. You can just about get away with Jack waltzing into midfield in the Championship but not in the Premier League. Quite frankly it’s embarrassing.  Why go in there to be an extra passing option to break the lines, if all you're going to do is unbreak the lines and go backwards.

By Saints standards, Russell Martin has an embarrassment of resources bearing in mind the investment in the squad in the summer. He has to be brutal with some of his decisions.  I think we have the players, despite still being a bit lacking in attacking areas, but he has to make some tough calls on certain players that he would rather not have to make.  Adam Armstrong looks completely lost at this level. it doesn't matter that he scored the goal at Wembley - this is a different assignment.  Will Smallbone played like he was 45 years old, second to every ball, jogging back behind the play and basically all the things that we suspected would happen when he played against Premier League athletes. It’s a shame and it’s not his fault but that’s just the way it is. You need to be athletic in midfield at Premier League level and Will just isn’t and he never will be.  Joe Aribo started the game well but completely died after about 25 minutes and though he looks promising in patches, it’s just not enough. Again, the issues of playing both Smallbone and Aribo as a combination in midfield when neither of them can run... it will never work.  There are better options than both of those two with Fernandes, Ugochukwu, Dibling and even Lallana all queueing up.  At a push, you can fit in one of Smallbone and Aribo but not both.

When we eventually changed the formation at 60 minutes, we started to look better as an attacking force. Cameron Archer had decent initial impact before fading as we failed to give him the ball. Mateus Fernandes was the same but his quality is there for all to see and there is a player there who should certainly be integrated into the starting 11. Adam Lallana as expected, added some quality when he came on but the game was gone by then.

Tyler Waltzes Past Defenders As Per Usual 

After the Cardiff game in mid week I said that we need to be cautious about throwing Tyler Dibling into the starting 11 but after his performance against Brentford, I have changed my mind a little bit because this is a team that needs a spark and he is it. He put in an absolutely ridiculously good performance from the bench, playing mainly from the right wing, beating a succession of players, created numerous crossing opportunities and was majorly responsible along with Lallana, for creating our consolation goal, which was expertly put away by Sugawara.

Su-ga-wa-ra, Southampton Goal Machine

Sugawara is an interesting player.  I feel that when we inevitably go to a back four, he needs to come out the side and we need to move KWP to right back and bring in Charlie Taylor on the left. It was a brilliant goal that he scored but in a back four the spotlight he’s going to fall more in his defending and today it really wasn’t very good, especially in the first half.

The way Saints play and the way that Russell Martin wants them to play was always going to come on the serious examination in the Premier League and so far, all the pundits are being proved correct. One definition of playing out from the back is what we do which is keeping the ball 30 yards from our own goal and trying to entice the other team onto us and not being afraid to pass the ball into midfield and then pass it back to the defenders. I don’t think that’s on at Premier League level because our defenders are not good enough to deal with the extra pace and intensity that in general, Premier League attackers have. Once you break the lines at the back, you cannot afford to unbreak it and bring them all back into play again.

Another definition of playing out from the back is basically when the goalkeeper gets it he plays it short but if it’s not on he doesn’t do that and looks to distribute it another way, either drilling a pass towards someone or hurling it out with a long throw to someone. I feel that’s fine and that’s where we need to land, not with the play at all costs approach which we seem to have at the moment. So far, in three games, we have conceded five goals. If you forget the long throw for a second the other four have all been caused by us basically giving the ball away within 25 yards of our own goal.  The number of goals we have scored as a result of playing out stands at zero.

We scored today by picking our way through an 11 man Brentford defence which as it stands, is the only way we are going to score because our build up is just too slow.  With the international break now upon us, we simply have to use it to get a four at the back system nailed down. I genuinely feel that it would help us in the Premier League. The defenders won’t have so many options to knock the ball around at the back so will have to pass it into the midfield and it allows us to have another attacking player on the pitch.  Obviously there's much more to it than that but that's just for starters.

It’s not the end of the world that we lost today. Obviously it’s not ideal and it’s only a completely wasted day if Russell Martin does not learn from it. Quite simply, he has to and I think we are about to find out exactly how ruthless he is prepared to be. He proved it last season with the Lumley/McCarthy decision, the beginning of Holgate decision and this season he’s proved in part that he doesn’t have favourites by not having Ryan Manning anywhere near a Premier League squad. I think he will prove is ruthlessness again by the time we come back after the international break.  We need him to.  

Up the fucking Saints

Premier League Match 27 - Southampton 0 Brentford 2

We're Fucked Lads

Brentford at home in the game that was originally supposed to be played on the weekend that the Queen died. Due to the way the fixtures have fallen, it is a chance for us to get a win that would take us out of the bottom three for the first time in what feels like forever. Brentford have already provided one of many nadir days for the season because it was when we went to their place that we lost 3-0 and Nathan Jones had his incredible dickhead interview, statistically.

As I was pondering before the last time we played them which was only a couple of months ago, Ivan Toney still has not been banned for betting breaches and he’s even admitted some of them. Strange one. Brentford have carried on from where they were at that stage and have been around the eighth or ninth in the league and on a pretty long unbeaten run which came to an end at Everton at the weekend. As we know ourselves, there are always teams who are doing unexpectedly well and then the wheels fall off towards the end of the season, so we have to hope for the Everton defeat can be repeated today.

In the recent past, there have been a few occasions when Saints have had a chance to win one game and for example, push into the top half of the table and on virtually every occasion, we have proved that we are not good enough to do so. This is a game that we have to believe we can win and getting out of the bottom three, even for a few days, will be huge if we can manage it. We are getting to the stage of the season where the league table does start to play psychological games with everyone involved. The difference going into the Tottenham game on Saturday will be huge depending on whether we are 16th or flat last.

A lot will depend today on our new found defensive resilience. The aforementioned Toney and Bryan Mbeumo will provide a very stiff test for Janny B and ABK.  Recovery from the Manchester United game will be important as well so you wonder about Theo Walcott playing two games in four days but I do not expect any sort of rotation today because we are at the stage of the season and in the situation where you have to target the game that’s in front of you and not think about the one in three days time.

Talking of the Manchester United game, their fans, fucking hell.  A quick scan of Twitter give you the biggest collection of football illiterates you could ever come across in one place. The majority still don’t think Casemiro should’ve been sent off and also believe that United should’ve had three penalties and some even think KWP deserved the racist abuse he got and that the racism was Anthony Taylor’s or VAR’s fault.

Anyway, tonight, Itchen Bridge, raining.  Team news and meh!  Ruben has decided to rest both Romeo Lavia and Theo Walcott, two of our better performers recently and replace them with two players off of my shit list. Mt shitlist is a list of players who cannot be relied upon to play two decent Premier League games in a row. Elyounoussi and Diallo are starting.  It’s really hard not to be pessimistic but assuming we line-up with the same formation, our creativity is going to be provided by two wingers, Elyounoussi and Sulemana, with zero goals and zero assists this season.

Away we go and Brentford are predictably the more assured looking side from the off. We are defending solidly enough but predictably are not creating a thing. Brentford are course very good at set pieces and from the first of them, Ivan Toney find himself completely unmarked at the back post but someone gets a boot to it and we just about get away with it.

Hickey gets in across from our left which is flicked on and Mbeumo meets at the back post and Baz just throws himself at it making himself as big as possible and it hits his foot – great save and booted clear.

It’s a temporary reprieve though as Brentford win a corner on our left.   In it comes From Mbeumo, flicked on at the near post by Norgaard who makes a really simple movement and there is Ivan Toney at the back post to knock it into an empty net. Brilliantly simple and 1-0 to Brentford.

I Bet He Doesn't Miss From There

In the 15 minutes that follow before half time, we do absolutely fuck all aside from one always rising shot from Alcaraz, which comfortably clears the bar and surely there has to be changes at half-time. We are so fucking static in front of our midfield when we’ve got the ball and there is absolutely no one to pass to. We come for the second half with exactly the same 11.

We do actually start the second half well with JWP and Alcaraz combining for Charly to put a lovely ball inside the full back for KWP to run onto. He gets to the line and pulls it back to Adams who of course, doesn’t score.  He manages to not hit th e goalkeeper this time but manages to hit the one defender who has got back behind the keeper. Can’t blame Che for that one.

We win a freekick on the right hand side as KWP gets chopped down and JWP tries a swinging effort at the far post but it swings quite a long way wide than it actually looked at the time.

The substitutions eventually arrives and mercifully it’s not the Chuckle Brothers today but it’s Romeo Lavia and Theo Walcott replacing the two stand-ins who have both been incredibly average.

The referee is beginning to get on my tits because Brentford are now time wasting for England and he is doing nothing about it. Every single challenge sees a Brentford player stay on the deck and the time taken over throws and goal kicks is getting ever longer.

Tall Paul is on for Alcaraz and we actually get a ball into the mixer, with Paul challenging Raya and through the keeper takes the ball comfortably enough,he then decides he wants some afters and gets in to Paul’s face.  Paul just looks at him and laughs. The referee fusses over and does fuck all.

Ivan Bet365 then follows in a shot that Baz comfortably reclaims having palmed it out and clearly goes to leave something on the goalkeeper.  Bednarek gets in his face and the referee decides that that’s worth a booking. Toney is booked as well, thus bringing in the bet he had on Ivan Toney scoring and getting booked.

90 minutes are up and there are seven minutes of extras for all the time wasting but Brentford are really good at it now and the first six minutes of it sees about a minute and a half of actual football as the referee does fuck all.  In desperation, we throw everyone forward with one minute to go and Baz’ goal-kick is met by a Brentford player, then flicked on by Toney and Wissa has a free run at goal and draws Baz out before slotting it past him. 2-0. Mass exodus. There should of course be about another four minutes to play, not that it matters but of course, the whistle goes straight away.

Well, we just fucked aren’t we?  Today started as another day of hope, a day when we would win and be out of the bottom three for the first time in ages. However, as usual, when given a clear target to achieve, we absolutely shat the bed on with a typical performance.

The likelihood of this happening started of course with the team selection. It’s a home game against a team that you have a decent shout of beating. Ruben picked a line-up to protect a couple of players with Walcott and Lavia left out, basically to save them for the more difficult game against Tottenham at the weekend. I could kind of see the logic of leaving those two out following the Manchester United game but it cannot be denied that the replacements chosen were a massive downgrade. Diallo is half the player that Lavia is - quite literally. If Lavia was struggling with the after affects of the United game then he shouldn’t be on the bench but if he wasn’t then he has to be on the pitch for us, bearing in mind how a few games he’s got left in a Southampton shirt.

Whereas Lavia will always find space to get attacks moving, Diallo simply does not though the lack of movement in front of him didn’t help him much.  On that score, it was actually the loss of Walcott it was felt most keenly especially when we went behind. Theo, despite his age, has that one thing that none of our other wide players have and that is movement ahead of the ball.  He gets himself into spaces with darting runs away from players. He uses the ball well. I’m not for a second saying he is a wonderful player anymore, but we are dealing with a pretty low bar here when it comes to wide players.

I heard people all around me moaning when the ball gets passed sideways across midfield but you can only complain if there was a forward pass on and the option was not chosen. 99% of the time when the midfielders have the ball, there is absolutely no forward pass on because none of the forwards fucking move. We are so static when our central midfielders have the ball but literally the only pass available is out of the full backs or back to the centre backs. The best central midfielders in the world wouldn’t be able to find forward pass with these strikers.

Elyounoussi has many flaws in his game or one of the worst ones is his lack of movement and he needs to move because he’s not quick enough to beat a player with pace and he’s not skilful enough to beat a player using a trick or dribbling.  He is just there. On the other wing we have Sulemana, who cost us £22 million to basically sign the same player as Sam Edozie, one that works hard, does the occasional dazzling thing on the ball but one who has absolutely zero end product, none whatsoever. He basically can’t pick out anyone with a cross and if it gets anywhere near the goal has absolutely zero composure.  Like Edozie he has a load of potential but potential has to turn into excellence (I sound like a LinkedIn Twat) right now because of where we are.

Che Adams battled away but he was as guilty as anyone of being static and Pinnock and Mee will really have had an easier afternoon. I think we took them out of their comfort zone once at the start of the second half and that was it. The introduction of Tall Paul in the last 25 minutes did little to change things. Again, I think we gave him one cross to compete for but he does look painfully out of his depth.

There will be people looking at our January transfer dealings and saying “ I told you so -  Sulemana from a French teams reserves, Onuachu from the Belgian league, Bree from the Championship, Orsic from the Croatian league… What impact of any of them had? I think we all had reservations about all of them.  Charly Alcaraz has contributed well but we kind of needed more than 1 out of 5 to hit the ground running.

Brentford didn’t have to be any good to stop us scoring. Once they went ahead with the free-kick move, all they had to do was remain organised and we had absolutely nothing. We completely wasted the half hour following going behind and for a team that needs as much time as possible to get the ball in the opposition there, that’s not good enough. Yes we have tightened up the defence and we needed to do that but when we get relegated, it’s going to be because three managers this season have not come up with any plan for the attacking third of the pitch. Surely movement off the ball is a coachable thing?  Since the World Cup we have scored seven league goals, five from JWP, of which most are free kicks and two from Charly Alcaraz. You don’t stay up with the lack of contribution we are getting from everyone else. Ultimately the reason that we couldn’t beat 10 man Manchester United was because we couldn’t stick the ball in the net and the reason we didn’t get anything out of the game today was because we couldn’t create anything and stick the ball in the net and ultimately the reason we will get relegated is because… You know the rest.

As if today couldn’t get any worse, there was another hamstring injury for KWP, one of our few genuine Premier League level players. With AMN being injured, the next cab off the rank was James Bree who seems to struggle regulating how hard he kicks the ball. He can ping a diagonal 60 yards from one flank to another but when it comes to getting any quality on a cross then it’s the knee-height dribbler that doesn’t reach.  Statistically though…

Thomas Frank, the manager who we should’ve gone all out to get when we appointed Nathan Jones, summed us up in one sentence and his post-match interview when he said that we were decent between the two penalty areas but the game is won in both boxes. Mic drop, the end.

In a week where consistency of refereeing has been questioned, we had a great one today involving the goalkeepers. David Raya threw his toys out of the pram because he got challenged by Tall Paul. It wasn’t a foul, it was just an aerial challenge. No one got booked. Ivan Toney takes a kick at Bazunu on the ground and Bednarek gets annoyed about it and Bednarek gets booked.   Also, there were seven minutes of injury time to be played and whilst ultimately Brentford scored again to make it irrelevant, the first six minutes out of the seven saw the ball in play for about a minute and a half as Brentford employed every Mickey Mouse time wasting trick in the book. There should’ve been another three or four minutes after Brentford scored the second goal, not that it would’ve made any difference.  If we had played until I had walked back over the Itchin Bridge in the rain and got back into my car, we still wouldn’t have scored.

Still, a win against Tottenham and we will have a little bit of optimism again but make no mistake, today was an absolutely major blow. We had an opportunity, and we blew it. We will not be getting many more opportunities and with a depressing manner of this defeat, I don’t blame anybody for preparing for the inevitable.