EFL Championship Match 23 - QPR 0 Southampton 1

 

Taylor's Strikers Finish - Not Like Our Actual Strikers

Four games in ten days with Christmas in the middle and it all kicks off today at Loftus Road, in the first repeat fixture of the season as we take on QPR.  It isn’t the first repeat of two managers setting up against each other though, because Gareth Ainsworth, he who looked like he came straight from the set of Lord of the Rings, has been sacked by QPR and replaced with the very little known Marti Cifuentes, who up till now had only managed four clubs in Scandinavia. Rumour has it that after Ainsworth got sacked, he was still waving at QPR fans trying to get them to make more noise to deflect away from the fact that he’d been sacked. Strange bloke but I’m sure he’ll turn up somewhere.

Under Cifuentes, QPR have showed signs of life and though still in the relegation zone, have got themselves back in touch recently with three wins in a row against Stoke, Preston and Hull.  However, in the last couple of games they have drawn at home to ten man Plymouth and lost to Sheffield Wednesday so maybe the new manager bounce has happened and now they are reverting to type.

Anyone who thinks this is going to be an easy away game needs to give their head a bit of a wobble though because QPR haven’t lost at home since Leicester beat them in October so there’s no way that this is a gimme. QPR caused us a lot of problems at St Mary‘s and we were somewhat fortunate to stumble over the line with a win.  Ilias Chair and Sinclair Armstrong were both particularly dangerous and in Lyndon Dykes, they have a striker who is so good that he occasionally keeps Che Adams out of the Scotland starting lineup. You probably can’t hear the sarcasm in the way I wrote that.

Russell Martin’s press conference today revealed that we had a fully fit squad to choose from, apart from long-term absentees Ross Stewart and Kamaldeen Sulemana. I was calling Ross Stewart a long-term absentee when I thought he was going to be back in January but now it appears that his hamstring injury is worse than feared, which means he has gone from “long-term absentee” to “who knows when the fuck he’s going to be playing again”. Estimates now say the start of next season, which is sad news but he's now nearing Agustin Delgado status.

With the transfer window about to open, I would suggest we need more goals to be signed by the Sport Republic cheque-book, especially if the aforementioned Adams departs and that seems likely. There will always be a Premier League club stupid enough to ignore current form.

Around the time that Russell Martin was announcing a completely unchanged starting 11 and bench from the Blackburn game, words came through that in the early kick-off, Leeds had won 4-0…. Booooo! … and it was against Ipswich… Yessss!  So, a bit more incentive for today.

Today at Loftus ‘Restricted View’ Road and QPR start the game really well and press Saints into errors which then allows them to break through Chair on the left hand side and carries the ball forward before firing in a low the cross which Baz dives out and collect well.  Bree is going to have his hands full out there.

Aribo, who is playing at 20 mph, while everyone else is playing at 100 mph, gets tackled just inside the QPR half of the ball squirts loose to Chair, who looks up and properly goes for it from just inside our half, smashing the ball towards goal and there is a brief moment when it looks like he’s done a Beckham but it drops about a yard over the scrambling Baz and the crossbar.

Saints show up in attack straight afterwards, with Bree getting  in a cross and it’s half cleared to Smallbone at the edge of the box but his effort is blocked and was going wide anyway. Edozie then attacks from the other side and dances across the top of the penalty area past couple of players, before taking aim and putting it just wide of the far post.  I was hoping for a throwback to the home game against QPR when Skate Begovic dived over an effort from a similar place.

Chair Leaves Breezy's Hamstring Flapping in the Wind

Chair vs Bree resumes on the QPR left and he gives a full back twisted blood before scuffing a shot through Smallbone’s legs and Baz pouches it easily enough.  Bree seem to pull up halfway through chasing back down the line and he tries to play on for a few minutes but it’s no good and down he sits, to be replaced by Ryan Manning.

Manning gets up and running straight away and feeds into Stuart Armstrong, who junks inside a player and plays a lovely ball into Smallbone on the penalty spot before he can get a shot away, Paal comes across and clears out everything.  Great tackle by the left back. 

A common complaint about Smallbone is that he doesn’t sprint anywhere but he puts in a bit of a burst which takes Dozzell by surprise and he brings him down out on the right.  Ryan Manning swings it in, flicked on by Adam Armstrong and at the back post THB has manhandled his way past his marker and cushions a volley past the Skate Begovic to make it 1-0 just before half-time.  Get in.

And we're off to Stockley Park:

"Hi - can you wait five minutes and check exactly how Harwood-Bellis got completely free and his man ended up on his arse?"

"Er, you're refereeing in the Championship aren't you?"

"Oh fuck, yes I am"

"Getting it in early for next year?"

"What do you mean?"

"Saints are going up"

THB Points at the Guy That Was Supposed to be Marking Him

The talk at half time probably said something along the lines of not having our usual flat start tot he second half but we ignored that and After ten minutes of the second half it looks like QPR are getting on top and Russell Martin goes pro-active and calls it early, with Downes, Smallbone and Edozie replaced with Charles, Adams and Fraser.  Suddenly, we don’t look like we are going to have our backs to the wall for the rest of the game and with QPR attacking with getting no shots on target, Saints are always a good bet on the break and the referee ignores Adam Armstrong being taken out off the ball and Aribo knocks a short pass in to KWP, who takes on five players dribbling into the penalty area before he gets crowded out.

Apart from Chair, the only decent QPR attacking player is Willock and he had a chance on the left but when composure was needed, the lashed it wildly over the bar. The same player then turns up on the right and gets in a shot from the edge of the box which again is straight at Baz.

Stuart Armstrong is having another good game but then has a beast of a moment when he picks up the ball in the centre midfield and inexplicably passes it straight to QPR player forcing Shea Charles to do what no one did up at Coventry and take the guy out and get a yellow card. Paal’s left-footed free-kick flies off the wall and goes for a goal-kick, to much hilarity.

Under pressure, Saints play some superb football out from the back with Manning playing it along the line to Adams, who (proper centre forward play klaxon) holds the ball up really well before knocking it round the corner to send the Wee Man scampering into the QPR half. He gets his head up and picks out Charles on the edge of the box, whose side footed effort is well saved and Aribo’s follow-up is blocked.  We are not settling for 1-0 and are trying to put this to bed and down the left again with Manning and Fraser eventually setting up Stuart Armstrong to step inside and drill the shot straight at the Skate.

Che Adams then take centre stage as we build down the right and work it across to Adams on the left and he has a choice of shooting or sliding it along the ground for Adam Armstrong to tap in but in the event does neither and chips in across which misses everybody.

The intention to see out the game is signalled with one captain being replaced with another – Adam Armstrong replaced with Jack Stephens and we are back with Che Adams, who does brilliantly to close down the QPR defender as he’s about to smash the ball long and the ball bounces through but onto his least favourite of his two week in feet and instead of smashing it left-footed he tries to get his right foot around it and chip the goalkeeper with the outside of his boot but can only knock it back to him at knee height. It’s beyond pathetic it really is. I don’t think there’s a striker in the top two divisions of English football who would’ve tried to do that and failed so badly.

As we approach 92 minutes, we get a bit intricate with our passing on the left and we lose it and QPR look to break and Shea Charles absolutely wipes him out with an arm across the neck. That’ll be a second yellow then and off you go.

QPR are still trying to play out from defence even though they are not very good at it and after a horrific attempt to control a throw-in by the QPR centre back, Adams picks it up in the penalty area and gets absolutely trashed but the referee is blind or stupid or both so that’s not a penalty.

The Manning Guide to Defending

94 minutes and as always happens, QPR win a corner in the 94th minute and up comes bloody Begović from the back, looking for his second career goal against Saints and it’s swung in from the right hand side and it’s an excellent delivery to the back post and there is Stephens rising above everybody to flick the ball out knowing full well that he was going to get completely clattered and ultimately that’s the last action of the game.

And with that masterful defensive header from Jack Stephens, the game is over and three points going back down the M3, probably via Bracknell because M3 junction closures always spring up out of nowhere.  What a game that was, in the second half especially. At 1-0 up, we still went for it and created loads of chances to score a second but couldn’t manage to do so. This of course gave QPR the odd opportunity but in all truth, they didn’t really test Baz at all.

I do however think QPR will comfortably survive as they looked decent and worked really hard.  They pressed well and played some good football but just lacked any sort of cutting edge. The big donkey Dykes was exactly the big donkey that we all kind of knew he would be and so any good work by Chair or Willock, was ultimately for nothing.

Saints had a few players who put in nothing performances in the first half with the usual suspects, Aribo and Smallbone not remotely being at the pace of the game.  Smallbone had a strange match. Ultimately, it was his burst of pace that caught the defender off guard that led to him being brought down for the free-kick from which are winning goal came from. On the other hand, the rest of the game, the lack of pace and intensity that he showed meant that he was almost identified as a pressing trigger for QPR, losing the ball multiple times and putting us on the back foot.  It was no surprise when he was taken off on 55 minutes.  Aribo on the other hand, really grew into the game in the second half and the likes of Stuart Armstrong and Ryan Fraser came to life. The back four was solid throughout with Ryan Manning having a very good game against his former club when he came on as a substitute for the luckless James Bree.

One player who was unlucky today was of course Shea Charles who picked up two yellows, basically covering for other people’s mistakes. He took a yellow card after a Stuart Armstrong mistake and then took another after we over-committed in the 90^th minute. One word of advice though is that if you just step in front of a player the referee might not see it but if you clothesline them, even the referees at this level are going to see it and give you a yellow card.  What the referee didn’t see was a ridiculous challenge and the penalty area on Che Adams which of course should’ve given us a penalty but as I say every week in this wonderful non–VAR competition that we are in this year, we win some, we lose some.

Today was one of those days when fouling Che Adams in a penalty area was a complete waste of effort because you might as well just let him out the ball because there’s a 99% certainty that he will fuck it up.  I can't get over that chance he missed.  OK, anyone can miss but to miss like that is something else.

It was a really good day for Russell Martin in that he learned the lessons of the Watford and Huddersfield games and we went for it after going 1-0 up. The substitutions he made on 55 minutes were spot-on, as was the change to introduce Jack Stephens for Adam Armstrong. It wasn’t long after Stevo came on that Shea Charles got sent off, after which Stevo went to right back to allow KWP to pressure QPR in their own half.  Regardless of the superb last minute header by Stevo, he is going to have to wait because not only did THB scored the winning goal, his partnership with Bednarek was absolutely faultless and goes a long way to explain why QPR were never really a threat on our goal.

One down, three Christmas and New Year games to go. Next up is the Boxing Day visit of Swansea in the Compensation Derby. Bring it on, Merry Christmas and Up the Fucking Saints.

EFL Championship Match 4 - Southampton 2 QPR 1

 

"Goal music Arma?  No one Told Me About That When I Signed!

QPR are the visitors to St Mary‘s today and we need to sort our home form out. A very quick piece of research told me that the last time we were in the Championship, we won our first TEN home games and overall, ended up winning SIXTEEN out of twenty-three.  Of course, at the end of that season we got promoted and so it stands to reason that we have to have a record somewhere near that at St Mary‘s if we are serious about getting promoted this season. We had a false start against Norwich and ended up drawing but today is no excuses. We have to put this QPR side away.

QPR started the season hilariously badly, being 4-0 down to Watford at half-time in the opening game, which they of course eventually lost. They followed that up with a win over Cardiff before falling to a narrow defeat to early-season pacesetters Ipswich Town. They are tipped to struggle this season because their financial problems are restricting any improvement to the squad. The familiar names include the ex-Premier League pair Asmir Begović and Steve Cook,  Begović well known for scoring against us when playing for Stoke and Cook, well known for getting absolutely tortured by Nathan Redmond every time we played Bournemouth. I expect he is even slower than he was back then. They also have Che Adams international striker partner in Lyndon Dykes but a recent injury makes his participation this afternoon unlikely.

Saints have had a very busy week since the last minute winner against Plymouth Argyle. It started with the completion of the acquisition of Flynn Downes for the season. Whilst he did not set the Premier League alight at West Ham last season, he has proven experience in the Championship and significantly, in a team managed by Russell Martin. Whilst he doesn’t replace JWP in terms of style of player and creativity, he gives us a bit of grunt and personality in midfield which has been missing at times this season already, where at times we have been just too nice. From what I have seen, admittedly, only on TV and YouTube, I can see him playing as a 6 and as maybe as an 8 at various points of the season. With the profile of player that West Ham are signing at the moment, I can see Flynn being available to buy next summer so this could well (if we get promoted) be a great move for everyone, the player, Saints and West Ham for that matter.

With Downes arriving on Monday the rest of the week was relatively quiet until we got to Friday and then it all went ape shit with early morning rumours of both Ryan Fraser and Mason Holgate were arriving on loan. By the early evening, both of those were confirmed but unfortunately it turned out that the club were pushing out some good news to hide some bad news later on.

Ryan Fraser was first in, a player who I have always had the opinion, was a little shit. Part of that was from his all-action relentless style of play and part of that it’s from the headlines that surrounded him every time he has moved club. Basically, there was controversy in the way he basically went on strike to leave Aberdeen to join Bournemouth a number of years ago and when he left Bournemouth, he refused to sign a monthly contract to play in the last few games of the relegation season in the Covid affected year, and Bournemouth ended up getting relegated. Not only that, he rather in tone deaf fashion, said that they might not have gone down if he had played.  Eddie Howe, the then manager of Bournemouth, was not best pleased of course so it must’ve been with great amusement in the Fraser household, when Eddie Howe became manager of Newcastle where Fraser had moved to. Whether it’s that or whether it’s the fact that Newcastle have just massively moved on, Ryan has found himself training with the under 23s for the last six months and nowhere near the first team picture. On the face of it, he is a decent Premier League level player who is looking to get his career back on track but until we see him in a Saints shirt, there will always be question marks over his attitude. I have very cautious optimism over this one but having just emerged from the season where a number of players had dodgy attitudes, I’m not sure it’s one I would’ve pursued myself. However, he is known to Russell Martin from his Scotland national team days so I guess we have to trust that.

Early evening saw the arrival of Mason Holgate on loan from Everton. It’s interesting because we were trying to do some business with Everton earlier on in the week but it turned out they didn’t have a pot to piss in and were trying to negotiate buying Che Adams for £15 million quid and paying next to nothing as an initial instalment. With that deal floundering, the deal for Holgate has gone through with us paying a portion of his alleged 70 grand a week wages for the season.  Holgate is the profile of player that we need, given that he is a experienced ball playing central defender who gives us more passable back up options as an alternative to Bednarek and Stephens.

Thanks for Not a Lot

Unlike Holgate,  Fraser was not a player in a position that we necessarily needed more players in but then it became apparent why he came in as Nathan Tella completed a move to Bayer Leverkusen in the Bundesliga for £20 million. On the face of it, it’s a great move for him, moving to a club playing Europa League football this season so in that respect, I can’t blame him for taking it.  However, the other way of looking at it is there we rescued Tella from the scrap heap when he was released by Arsenal and we stood by him when he did his ACL and didn’t play for a year.  We also gave him chances in the Premier League that he didn’t really take and then loaned him out to Burnley where he admittedly did incredibly well at Championship level.  This season was to be the year for him to pay a little bit back but it’s player first, club a very distant second these days.  I guess it’s a case of moving on another player who doesn’t really want to be here but he would undoubtedly have been an asset this season so in that respect it’s a shame.  It’s a big risk for Leverkusen as well because Tella is completely unproven at anything above Championship level.  At least he didn’t move to Burnley.

Back to today and the team news drops – from last weeks’ starting XI there’s no Tella of course and also no Che Adams who isn’t even on the bench, which basically means that two of our goalscorers from last week are not here. Into the team come Charly Alcaraz and it’s a full debut for Sam Amo-Ameyaw.  Can we keep this run going with a progressively worse starting 11 every week?  QPR manager Gareth Ainsworth has them lined up in what looked like a 4-5-1 park-the-bus formation so it’ll be an interesting test of our patience.

Early doors and it’s Edozie looking lively out on the left and he twists away from the QPR right-back Smyth,  who falls over in comical fashion before Edozie’s cross hits a QPR defender on the outstretched arm. There are big appeals for handball but whilst all that was going on, Adam Armstrong picked it up and saw his shot blocked for a corner.  Where’s VAR when you need it for fucks’ sake?  This is a joke by the way.

The game settles down and nothing much is happening until Jack Stephens goes down and it becomes immediately apparent that he’s not getting back up again.  ABK is he obvious like-for-like replacement on the bench but it’s Flynn Downes who makes his debut with Shea Charles dropping into the back four.

Five minutes later and we get given a free kick in midfield for a foul on Adam Armstrong.  A quick tap to short to Ryan Manning he slides the ball in between the right back and centre back to Edozie, who cuts infield onto his right foot and hits it and it goes under and through the ex-Skate Begovic and goes on its way into the net for Sam‘s first goal in professional football.  Get in.  We haven’t been great but we’ll take it.

It was just after this moment, that the ex-Skate knew he had fucked up

QPR immediately show bit of an attacking intent and actually get some players into our half to support Sinclair Armstrong up front.   Needless to say, we are all over the shop as Smyth gets a cross in from the right, which is half cleared out by Downes to Colback, who takes a touch and hits it first time and sees it skim along the turf, hit the inside of the near post and nestle in the opposite side of the net.  Great strike to be fair but my appreciation of it is tempered by the fact that we’ve conceded yet again, less than five minutes after we’ve gone in front – same as in the last two games.

QPR are now looking at the better side and we don’t know how to deal with them.  Chair picks up the ball on the left-hand side and dances across the top of the box before having a shot, which is superbly saved by Bazunu but there is Sinclair Armstrong to knock it into the net but before we can go ‘full for fuck‘s sake’, the flag goes up so it goes down as a great save by Baz…. Push it sideways though mate, please.

Half time and a very stodgy half of football from us, probably brought on by the changes we had to make in the side.  Adam Armstrong has not really been effective up front and Sam Amo is finding starting a game a very different prospect to playing the last fifteen minutes.  Downes has settled nicely in midfield and we need to be much better in the second half.  Oddly, QPR getting a bit more confident in themselves at the end of that half, might help us a bit.

The second half starts in much the same as the first half ended, with us not looking completely convincing. Alcaraz gets fed a hospital ball out of defence but doesn’t deal with it remotely well enough and we cough up possession with QPR breaking and the ball finding its way to Chair on the left hand side who has a free shot at Baz and drills it straight at him. Corner. Over it comes and it’s pure carnage with us again not getting the ball away and eventually finds itself with Smyth on the right, but instead of crossing he smashes it at the near post and hits the side netting.

Another QPR break and more pinball around the edge of the box with committed defending but the ball seems to find his way back to QPR the whole time. Eventually it’s worked wide to Smyth again and a better shot this time which crashes off the bar and goes off for throw on the far side. We are living somewhat dangerously here.

It’s time for a change how refreshing to have a manager who realises that.  Ryan Fraser is on for Sam Amo and Sekou Mara is on for Charly Alcaraz.  Adam Armstrong drops into midfield and Edozie moves right to put Fraser on the left.  The two taken off have both struggled to make much of an impact today.

Fraser immediately makes an impact of his own by putting the ball in from the left-hand side about three times and it puts QPR on the back foot with Saints now controlling possession all of a sudden. Some patient build up down left with Fraser again prominent and he lays the ball back to Manning who puts it over and Adam Armstrong takes a touch, the ball drops and on the turn he smashes one across Begović and into the far corner. Brilliant finish.  Goal music, I don’t care, get in.

With twenty five minutes to go, we enter a strange phase of the game where there’s too much time left to just keep possession but we seen reluctant to go all out for a third goal to kill it off.  We seem to keep turning back into midfield, rather than do the obvious thing which at this moment in time is keep giving the ball to Fraser.  However, there is a strange incident in which Mara is wrestled to the ground by Colback.  Mara quickly taps the free-kick through to Ryan Fraser who is clean through and tries to flick it over Begovic who gets a hand to it, only for the referee to stop the game and make us take the free kick again – this time of course, with all eleven QPR players behind the ball.  Bizarre.  Imagine if Fraser had scored.

As the game counts down it wouldn’t be Saints without some more dodgy moments and QPR break down our left and the ball across is half blocked by Manning but arrives at the feet of young QPR sub Sideshow Bob, who luckily for us, takes a shit touch and we calmly play out of defence and get away with it.  Ten points out of twelve. Get in.

Keeping Winning With an Ever Weakening Squad

Thank fuck for that, A home win and just about deserved on the second half performance though you’d be hard-pressed to argue that QPR didn’t deserve anything. Considering that the team had the attacking heart ripped out of it 24 hours before the kick-off, any win, no matter how narrow has to be applauded.

The first half was pretty average to be honest with Saints unsurprisingly, looking pretty toothless upfront. Adam Armstrong, having reverted to his favourite position, seemed to spend more time out of the box than in it and we didn’t have a focal point. Sam Edozie had a really good first half out on the left and thoroughly deserved his first professional goal. He perfectly gave the QPR right back twisted blood in the first half when he walked round him leaving the hapless defender flat on his arse.

Sam Amo on the right struggled to get into the game but will have learnt a lot from today all will be better next time. I honestly don’t think he would have started today if it wasn’t for the fact that Ryan Fraser only arrived yesterday.

We pulled our usual trick of scoring and then switching off and allowing QPR to equalise and for the rest of the first half, they looked the better side. The second half was eventually a different story with Flynn Downes settling in to his role in the centre of midfield and Shea Charles fitting in nicely alongside Bednarek who had sussed out how to play against the right handful Sinclair Armstrong, up front for QPR, who has that horrible (for a defender) combination of pace and power. Those three shutting the door on most of QPR‘s attacking efforts for the last half an hour and the bringing on of Ryan Fraser was key, with the latter being the catalyst for our winner. The only downside of Fraser coming on was that it moved Sam Edozie over to the right, where he was not nearly as effective, possibly because QPR’s left back Paal was decent.

It is quite bizarre how Adam Armstrong suddenly looks twice the player joining in from midfield than he does when he plays upfront. Our lack of attacking options however was perfectly illustrated by the fact that in order to drop Adam deeper, we had to bring on Sekou Mara, who simply reminded Sport Republic that we need another striker.  Armstrong clearly revels in space, be it behind the defence or in front of it.  He’s not great when under pressure when tightly marked.  In the four games so far, he was the worst player in our side when playing as a striker at Hillsborough.  Against Norwich he came alive when Che came on and he moved out left and had his best match of the season in midfield against Plymouth.

There were some strange performances out there today with Alcaraz probably having the worst game he’s ever had in a Saints shirt whereas Gavin Bazunu had one of his best. I was also very impressed by how well Jan Bednarek coped with Sinclair Armstrong and organised the defence after Captain Jack had gone off. It looks like a bit of a nasty injury for Stephens so the signing of Mason Holgate has come at exactly the right time.  Bednarek got very lucky to be awarded a free kick in the first half when he got caught out by Armstrong’s pace but he learned from that and kept the powerful youngster in check from then on in.

Ryan Manning had a strange one as well.  There were times when I wondered if he’d ever stopped a cross coming into the box in his entire career but then up he pops with two assists.  Every opposition manager will be targeting his side of the pitch as the season goes on, especially if KWP stays, and how he copes with that is going to be key.  He is undoubtedly a threat going forward though and so far, that is outweighing any defensive frailty.

QPR were decent and with better finishing would have got something from the game.  They’d maybe be helped if their manager Gareth Ainsworth spent more time running the team and less time waving at the away end.  Characters in the game need to be encouraged but I felt he overdid it somewhat and it made him look like a bit of a bluffer.  If I interact with the crowd it will make me popular and they won’t look at my actual performance too much.  It’s called ‘Doing a Lyanco’.

Over to Sport Republic. If Che Adams leaves this week as seems likely, he has to be replaced and you are not going to be able to get a player in on loan who anyone is going to want to let go, who is going to score 20 to 25 goals in the Championship. It’s going to cost real money. With Nathan Tella having gone as well, you could easily argue that 30 to 40 goals have been taken out of this team overnight. Good though Ryan Fraser was today, he is not going to contribute enough goals and the rest of the team is not going to contribute enough goals to make up for that.  We are one Adam Armstrong injury away from having to rely on Sekou Mara or on Dom Ballard stepping up from the youth team. Goals cost money and not having them costs places in the league table. Who remembers the end of 2016 when we tried to swap Sadio Mané and Graziano Pellè for Nathan Redmond and Charlie Austin and expected to score enough goals the following season. Didn’t fucking work did it?  In more recent times we replaced Ings with Broja and just about got away with it but when we replaced Broja with Mara, we got relegated.

The books have been balanced and in fact, the sale of Nathan Tella puts Sport Republic into profit regarding transfer fees. Some proper money needs to be invested now because we cannot keep letting the squad get weaker and weaker and expect to capitalise on this very good start to the season. 10 points out of 12 is very good indeed but the next two games are probably considerably tougher than what we’ve had so far, with a trip to Sunderland and a home game against those arrogant bastards Leicester City, whose fans are still unbelievably being arrogant, despite that not working out too well for them last season.  Today wasn’t great but and we rode our luck at times, but we got there in the end.

Today’s win was hugely important for the short-term overall mood around the place. I felt that the atmosphere in the ground was a little bit flat, probably caused in part by what had gone on the previous day and it would all of seems like an act of self-sabotage if we had not won. The win keeps everybody onside though and so we roll into the last week of the transfer window before next weeks game at Sunderland. A couple more additions in attacking areas and we can all feel very optimistic about the season ahead especially having got the first of hopefully many wins at St Mary’s.

Premier League Match 24 - QPR 0 Southampton 1

Complete Your Weekend With a Picture of Ballsack Looking Miserable.

Well it looked like it was going to be a chance to put a nail in Redknapp’s coffin but as it turned out, by the time the game had come around, Redknapp had jumped in his own coffin and managed to nail it down.  He wasn’t pushed allegedly, oh no, he jumped.  Or did he jump… he’s got a dodgy knee after all which is why he jumped… with one leg, obviously.  Now I’m not questioning ‘Arry’s integrity at all here but a month ago he gave an interview where he said he was the first man on the training pitch and the last to leave and that he loved his life and walked his dogs every day.  Now he’s quitting because he can’t walk and has a dodgy knee.  I don’t believe that the passing of a transfer window when he didn’t sign a single player had anything to do with it either, oh no… nor 11 away defeats in a row, nor another relegation staring him in the face.  Tony Fernandes, the Rangers owner then came out and gave the description of the type of manager he’d like at QPR, how he has to work with what he’s got and play the youth and all those things that are the complete opposite to what ‘Arry does.  Still, dodgy knee, that’ll be it.  Tosser.

So, Redknapp does his usual and leaves a team in a worse state than he found it but having spent millions and lumbered the new manager with the job of shifting the 35 year old deadwood on 3 year contracts.  The amusing thing is that the favourite to get the QPR job is Captain Massive Helmet Colossal Bellend himself, Tim Sherwood.  This is because his coaching staff at Spurs, Les Ferdinand and Chris Ramsey are now with QPR.  This appointment hasn’t happened yet though so Ramsey is in the dugout today, trying to right Redknapp’s dreadful mismanagement.  Let us not forget also that Glenn Hoddle was working under Redknapp as well and he quit rather than stick his head above the parapet which was a bit odd I thought.  QPR are basically a likeable club so I hope they sort themselves out and that starts after this game.

Since our last game, the transfer window has ended and despite the fact that Clyne, Schneiderlin and Rodriguez were all leaving (or being carried in Jay’s case), none of them did and we added to the squad with attacking midfielder Filip Djuricic joining on loan.  What we also had was Ryan Bertrand joining permanently for a fee of anywhere between £8.5 and £10 million depending on what you read.  Overall I’d say that’s pretty good business….sell Fatty Shaw for £27m and sign Bertrand for £10m. Ronald seemed happy enough anyway though he did stress the need to qualify for Europe this season to have a chance of keeping our best players and that’s the key – you’d have to admit you were leaving for the money if the club you were with had qualified for the Champions League.

The team today looked quite exciting on paper.  With Djuricic still waiting for a work permit and Bertrand being suspended, we named Matt Targett at left back and Dusan Tadic was dropped with Elia and Mané starting a game together for the first time.  The big news was that Big Vic was back in place of Harrison Reed and Morgan Schneiderlin made it back as far as the bench which suddenly didn’t have an average age of 14.  Ramsey had unsurprisingly changed things about from Mr Ballsack’s last selection but he still had a 36 year old centre half at left back.  He recalled Adel Taraabt who every time I’ve seen him, has done one brilliant thing a game and then spent the remaining minutes until he gets substituted being shite.  Up front they have Charlie Austin who not only scores all of their goals but he also always scores against us, be it for Swindon, Burnley or QPR.

After a cagey opening five minutes the game comes to life as we build up from defence down the right.  Clyney, Big Vic and JWP are all involved and the ball is slotted through to Elia who is about 40 yards out but he’s spotted that Rob Green has come out into no mans land and he’s tried to do at Big Vic at Hull and smash it straight in, only to beat the keeper and see it sail five yards wide.  What the fuck was Green doing?  A few weeks ago he got away with handling outside his box and he’s been lucky here.  If Elia’s shot had been closer to him he’d have handled it and he was outside his box again.  Get in your fucking goal you idiot.

Taraabt gets himself on the ball and megs JWP who turns and chases the ball but Taraabt has made the slightest contact with him and flops to the ground and the referee buys it.  Fuck off.  The Rangers fans love it though as they’ve been fed a diet of shite this season and the free kick gets nodded out as far as Barton who lashes it over the bar.

Elia and Mané are both finding space behind the QPR midfield and Barton takes one for the team by trashing Mané to give us a free kick.  JWP delivers into the right area and Big Vic shanks an effort wide for a goal kick.  If you had an effort on goal like that in a Sunday League match then half of your team mates would be laughing at you or calling you a wanker.  I’m guessing that no one said anything to Big Vic.

Following that, QPR welly the ball out to their right wing and Matt Targett goes up for it with Matt Phillips who catches him with a leading arm and Targett is motionless on the pitch where he lands.  This is not good, 7 minutes later, stretcher on, neck brace on, off he goes to be replaced with Florin Gardos with Maya getting shoved over to left back.  It’s interesting that football gets a lot of bad press but player safety was paramount here which is interesting when compared to the way George North was unconscious twice in yesterdays Wales v England rugby match and still carried on.

The substitution has not stopped our domination of the game and Mané again finds space before drilling a 30 yarder along the ground which Green saves at full stretch.  More of the same a few minutes later as JWP finds Mané who knocks it into space behind Hill and it gone but Caulker does enough to put him off and his shot from the edge of the box on the stretch doesn’t have enough on it to seriously test Green who pushes it behind for a corner.  Over goes JWP to swing it out and José Fonte meets it on the volley with his shin and it smacks off the middle of the bar and out again before being cleared.

Graziano appears to be playing a bit deeper today to allow the pacy boys to do their stuff and it works to great effect soon after as he turns a lovely first time ball around the corner and Elia is away behind Onouha but he can’t get the eventual shot across the keeper and Green saves at the near post.  The final action of the first half is again as a result of a good passing move with Elia getting brought down by Dunne and the ball lodging between his thighs which gives Dunne the chance to smash the ball and Eljero’s bollocks which he gleefully takes.  I’m amazed more wasn’t made of this, either by the referee of by the other Saints players.  I’ll excuse Elia for not getting involved as he was busy writing in agony and checking to make sure his balls were still where they should be and not in his throat.  Anyway, after all that we have a free kick right on the edge of the box and JWP tries to go round the wall but starts it off too wide and it doesn’t curl back in enough.

Half time and though we’ve been the better side by a mile and had all the chances it was still 0-0 and Austin hadn’t scored yet.  Mind you, he’d hardly touched the ball with the service from Taraabt, Phillips and Traore being as bollocks as a Harry Redknapp excuse.

The opening of the second half was dull with Traore heading into the side netting after Clyney had made a bit of a bollocks of a Phillips cross which surprised everyone by staying on the pitch.  Hill picked up an inevitable booking for catching Mané and on the hour mark, Big Vic’s day was done and on came Morgan Schneiderlin.

We weren’t playing as much football as in the first half and a lot was failing on our final ball.  Pellè was looking knackered and continually losing out and JWP and Davis were trying to get the quick lads away and though they made good runs, the ball to them was always lacking.  Route 1 was attempted with a Gardos clearance, a Pellè flick on and Sadio lashed it first time into the top row of the Loftus Subbuteo Stadium.

Mauro Zarate was on for QPR in place of Taraabt who had contributed precisely nothing.  Zarate is the player they’ve just got on loan from West Ham who ‘Arry then decided to try and send back so he could loan Matt Jarvis.  Anyhow, he’s on and he gets on the end of Phillips’ 2^nd on-pitch cross and forces Fraser into a comfortable save which he would have taken in his sleep.  Up the other end and Mané plays a 1-2 with Pellè and it looks like he’s in but Caulker again gets back to block and Green flops on the loose ball.

We are then extremely grateful to our own keeper as QPR get a corner which is cleared as far as Barton who smashes it back in towards goal.  Austin sticks a foot out to no doubt score his obligatory goal against Saints but Fraser instinctively throws up a right arm and somehow manages to shovel it over the bar.  What a fucking save that is.  OK, he’s got a bit lucky as it’s hit his upper arm and gone over but the reactions are first class.  If a Man United keeper does that then it’s on TV for the next 10 years.

As time runs down, Tadic comes on so Elia can go and count his balls again and the new man immediately gives the ball away and Zarate cuts in from the left and fires over the bar.  The will be an additional 4 minutes.

The first three minutes are end to end and nothing much happening and then Caulker rumbles forward and passes straight to Tadic on the right wing.  He plays a 1-2 with Clyney and spreads the play to Yoshida who has come up from left back.  A first time ball in to Sadio’s feet and he rolls away from Onouha and with his left foot, smashes it past Green and into the top tight corner.  You little fucking beauty.

Even with 94 minutes of the 94 gone – we still find a way to give everyone the shits and the best Rangers move of the match sees a cross come in from the right and then a challenge send the ball miles up in the air.  Down it comes on Fraser who tries to catch it when he really should have used his 6 foot 7 to punch the ball miles but Onouha bundles into him and the ball drops and ends up in the net.  It has to be a foul but then all the Saints players are round the referee and for a second I shat myself that he’d given it but he’s given offside.  He later said that if it wasn’t offside he’d have given the foul so fair enough.  Fuck me we’ve won again and are back up to 3^rd.  It’s all completely mad.

The only thing that could have made this any more beautiful would have been that ‘Arry was still in charge and this result got him sacked.  Can you imagine the twitch-per-minute count in the post match interview?  We made hard work of it but we totally deserved to win the game and that’s what successful teams do – they find a way to win, be it in the first minute or the last.

Ignoring the fact that we took 94 minutes to find a goal for a moment, it’s another triumph for Koeman and his tactical nous.  Back when we had a run of defeats and injuries, he changed to 3 at the back for the Everton game and we won comfortably.  Recenky we’ve been struggling to create chances so he changes it again and plays both Elia and Mané to put the slow QPR back line under pressure.  Today we created chances and could have scored a lot more than we did.  Other positives were of course another clean sheet and the returns of Big Vic and Morgan.  On the other side we’ve got a bit of a left back crisis with Ryan Bertrand having 2 more games on his suspension and Matt Targett out for the next game at least.  Maya slotted in well there today but of course you lose the attacking threat from full back.  Having said that, it was Maya who got the assist for the goal.  The other negative was that Graziano looked completely fucked during this game.  His touch was heavy and he didn’t seem to have the strength to hold off the defenders.  The bloke is knackered and needs a rest but there’s no chance of him getting one with J-Rod expected to be out all season and Sam Gallagher only just returning to the Under-21’s. 

Next up we have West Ham at home.  They drew at home to Man United on Sunday when they conceded a last minute equalizer after United had thrown on Fellaini and gone ‘get it in the mixer’ like they did against us.  That’s what you get when you spend £150m on your team I guess.  Tossers. The irony of Fat Sam bemoaning that his team couldn’t deal with ‘long ball’ United was lost on no one.  West Ham are decent this season though so this will be a tough game.  When we beat them 3-1 at Upton Park at the start of the season they had no Valencia, no Sakho and no Carroll either so this will be different.  Andy Carroll has his critics but it can’t be denied that he’s brilliant in the air so Florin Gardos is going to have to man up in this game and deal with it.  Pussy footing around and getting shoved about is not an option.  At the other end of the pitch I look forward to Joey O’Brien trying to deal with Elia and Mané.  Sadio is now 4 goals in 4 starts and to think of the amount of stick he was getting a while ago.  As unbelievable as it sounds, some fans might not know what they are talking about.

Premier League Game 6 - Southampton 2 QPR 1

Another bad day for 'Arry Ballsack

Ah Mr Redknapp – we’ve been expecting you...

Mr Redknapp is a bit predictable.  The last time he was in the Premier  League with QPR he decided in time honoured fashion to try and buy his way out of the relegation zone in the January transfer window, spunking millions up the wall on past-it mercenaries and giving them ridiculous length contracts on ridiculous money.  They got emphatically relegated.    Naturally, when a tactic has completely failed and you’ve nearly bankrupted the club, it makes perfect sense to make your first signing of the new season, a 35 year old Rio Ferdinand who was gone as a top level player about 3 years ago but propped up by the last knockings of Alex Ferguson’s reign at Old Trafford.  He was found out big time last year but ‘Arry still bought him…. Because he could.

Another sortie into the transfer marked have seen Steven Caulker arrive who got relegated with Cardiff last season.  He’s a decent centre half when paired with a quicker one so the partnership of him and Rio is always going to work out great.  Loic Remy has departed to Chelsea and he was the man who scored the winner in the last meeting at SMS when QPR came into the game as underdogs and left with the win.  This had better not happen today.

‘Arry can’t understand it of course but we all hate him.  In a year when two of our players were dreaming of Liverpool when they were still our players, it’s worth remembering that ‘Arry’s ‘heart was never in it’ when he was manager of Southampton and whilst he was still our manager, he got himself a job at Portsmouth.  Oh.... he made sure we got relegated first.  No doubt the way he’d see it was that he set in motion the chain of events that saw us rise to where we are now. 

Since the Arsenal game we’ve been basking in the glow of positive publicity and now we’ve got some more good news in that Toby Alderweireld is back in training.  The questions today are Mané or Long, Toby or Florin and which two out of Big Vic, Steve Davis or Corky.  Come 2pm we had the answers that Gardos had a knock and so Tony Autoharold started, Big Vic and Davo were in midfield with Morgan and Long was benched again in favour of Mané.  The bench saw Jason McCarthy for the first time and Harrison Reed was there in place of the injured JWP.  The 7^th sub, as in the sub that will be put on the pitch after Kelvin Davis has been given a run in midfield, was Emmanuel Mayuka.  QPR include Ferdinand and Caulker but there was no place for Frank Lampard and Jermain Defoe even though their triffic top top players and surprisingly, Jamie Redknapp was left out as well.  He was probably at home playing the Wii with Rosie the Dog.

Aside from injury speculation, since the Arsenal game, the only story that had emerged about Saints was that the players asked Ronald Koeman to cancel their day off as the senior players (led by José Fonte) decided they would be better for it.  A seriously good touch by the players.  Could you imagine some of the old school players like Mick Channon or Jim Steele coming in voluntarily instead of having a day off?

Good old Twattenberg is refereeing us for the first time since he was cleared of any blame for the ‘Lallana has changed’ incident at Everton last year.  Vindicated he may be but he’s still a very dodgy ref.  We make a decent start and within 30 seconds, Tadic is playing Mané away on the left and his cross is held by Green.  A few minutes later and Pellè and Clyne combine to sent Tadic away on the right but his attempted lob is well smothered by the onrushing Green, who has started confidently.  We really need an England v USA 2010 performance from him.

The fast start that we’ve made is stopped dead as Sandro and Mané compete in a competition to see who has the hardest head and Sadio wins. Sandro is out cold and as it’s a head injury they can’t move him off the pitch and so five minutes later, we’re still waiting as he is helped back to his feet and goes off to be replaced by Karl Henry.

The game become bitty and fragmented and that was down the Twattenberg and his bright shiny whistle which he wanted to make sure everyone noticed.  QPR were having some possession in our half but nothing really dangerous.  Saints should really have taken the lead and wasted three good chances.  Firstly Tadic got a shot away from the edge of the box and was unlucky to see it bounced off of Caulker, beat Green and hit the post and bounce away.  Then Pellè got played into the inside right channel and went near post instead of far and smashed it wide in what has to be said, was a pretty poor effort.   QPR were carved open again in the same channel just before half time as a 1-2 between Morgan and Mané gave the Frenchman a chance which he sidefooted just wide and so we arrived at half time at 0-0.  We’ve been the better side by a mile and you can see why QPR are near the bottom but as it stands, they’re hanging in there.

The second half starts I much the same way as the first half ended with Saints on top.  Mané tricks his way through and scuffs a shot at Green.  Ten minutes are gone and QPR are looking comfortable until Rio Ferdinand chips a horrible, casual, aimless ball into the midfield and it’s picked off by Morgan who feeds Tadic.  His cross is overhit and behind Mané but the new guy retrieves it, waits for Bertrand’s run and backheels it to him through the defenders legs.  Bertrand runs on and smashes it low and hard, under Green and into the net and the deadlock is broken and our other full back has scored, something that last years left back never managed to do.

Hoilett is on for QPR but Saints are looking for a second with Mané playing through Pellè on the left and his pull back is flashed at by Davis but the ball breaks to Tadic who is too close to Green who deflects it over the bar as Tadic tries to scoop it over him.  We nearly scored from the resulting corner through Graziano but out of nowhere, our profligacy in front of goal comes back to bite us in the arse as Hoilett cuts in from the left and feeds Vargas whose cross is brilliantly controlled by Austin who swivels and buries the volley.  Bollocks and is ‘Arry going to do us again?

Almost immediately, Shane Long is on for Mané and his first involvement is to cut inside and hit over a cross. Tadic heads it down and Graziano flicks it up before it bounces and overhead scissor kicks it over Green and into the far corner.  It’s fair to say that we went fucking mental.  What a goal.  Theirs was good, ours was better and you’re not singing any more is repeated back at the QPR fans tenfold.

Corky is on for Big Vic who has been magnificent today and Saints are hell bent on putting the game to bed.  Long is a pest down the right and robs Traore.  His cross is half cleared to Davis to curls a beautiful left footed shot past Green and smashing into the post.  Back come QPR and Austin should have done better with a free header but put it wide and it’s end to end as Davis slides Long clean through cutting in from the left but his finish is piss poor when 1v1 with Green and is more like a back pass.

Bobby Zamora, another relic on a fortune per week is on and QPR resort to hoofing it up to him and to be fair, it’s working.  He’s giving Alderweireld and Fonte a hard time and the ball is dropping down and in the absence of Big Vic, no one is picking it up.  It’s allowing Kranjcar to get on the ball in the dangerous areas and he’s their best player by a mile.  Graziano goes back to help out and does the opposite by bringing down the Croat who goes down like a sack of shit and Twattenberg buys it.  Up steps Kranjcar and it’s over the wall and crashing down off the bar and we’re all mighty relieved as Caulker gets to the rebound but can only loop it over the empty goal.

Up the other end we go and Hoilett decides to shoulder barge Tadic in the chest and give us a free kick in the same position as the one QPR just had.  Dusan is obviously told to leave it by Davis after an earlier piss poor effort and the Northern Irishman curls it over the wall and inches wide of the near post at crossbar height.  QPR are done now and leaving gaps all over the place and Tadic breaks away on the left onto Corky’s return pass and smashes his shot against the near post and away again before being replaced by Matt Targett who is making his league debut.  He slots in on the left, we waste a bit of time and Twattenberg brings the game to a close.

Tough game but another win to maintain our ridiculous 2^nd place in the league table.  We made heavy weather of beating a very average QPR side but it’s all about the end result.  On another day, with more clinical finishing, it could easily have been 4 or 5-1 but 2-1 is more than adequate.  Goal of the month should be interesting this month as our last three games have seen screamers from Big Vic and Clyney and now Graziano tops the lot with today’s effort.  It’s a fantastic effort and the guy just seems to be getting better and better with a place in the next Italian squad beckoning.  As if being 6 foot 4, Italian and beautiful with a model girlfriend isn’t enough... he can also score overhead kicks to win a game in the Premier League.  Hasn’t got much going for him has he?

The goal is going to take all the headlines but for me, the stars of the show were Steven Davis, Big Vic and Sadio Mané.  Vic and Davo were everywhere in midfield, constantly winning the ball back and along with Morgan, forming an excellent midfield unit.  Steve Davis of course didn’t score again but at least today it was down to a bit of misfortune rather than crap finishing.  We notably looked more dodgy defensively when Vic went off as Corky wasn’t quite at the races when QPR started going Route 1 up to Zamora.  Sadio is going to frustrate at times but the unpredictability he brings is going to create a lot of openings for us.  He seems to have a brain as well as being quick which is good because as we well know, just being quick like Mayuka or Papa Waigo, really isn’t enough.

Ronald Koeman is finding this ‘managing in the Premier League’ lark really easy and his post match interviews  are all running to the same template.  He talks about his surprise at our great start and then talks about the latest worldy which has flown into the opposition net.  Hopefully the post-match interviews will run to the same template for a quite a while yet.

I think part of the problem with QPR is them trying to score in the specified minute of a game to make ‘Arry’s bets come up trumps.   His post match interview was along the lines of... “Charlie Facking Austin, don’t give me Charlie Facking Austin... I facking had him to score in the 72^nd minute, not the facking 71^st.... ‘ave a facking word saaaan. ... I mean Rio (twitch), great professional, great lad... gave the ball away....as instructed for their first goal but Pele, not bad for 72 with Viagra.... (twitch) nice goal saan, triffic, gave ‘im ‘is break at West ‘Am in the 80s, top top player,  like Trevor Brooking – he’s 60 but ‘ees a triffic pro, fit as a fiddle and I’ve offered him ‘undred grand a week... ee can still do a job.  I’m off to Sandbanks with Rosie the dog that I aven’t got and a text message from Steve G on the phone I don’t know how to use... (twitch) just me, Sandra, Jamie and the Wii and Louise made the tea saaan, triffic”.

Redknapp’s actual reaction was fair enough in that he talked up the world class goal and then it was all ifs, buts and maybe’s about QPR’s prospects.  He seemed a bit down did ‘Arry.  I’d feel a bit sorry for him if I didn’t think he was a complete helmet.

Next up we have a rather tasty trip to White Hart Lane.  Forgetting the dishonourable shitbag they have as manager for a moment, we really owe Spurs one.  4 games in the Premier League since we got back and we haven’t even got a point yet.  Two one-man-team-Bale defeats, a Gazzaniga / Hooiveld production and a capitulation from 2-0 up.  This is the one where that changes.  With Pochettino in charge, we know exactly how Spurs are going to play and we will know how to counteract it buy turning defence into attack quickly, either through the pace of Sadio Mané or by going more direct up to Graziano Pellè.  After an indifferent start to the season, a defeat at the hands of Southampton at White Hart Lane could see the notoriously fickle Spurs fans start to show some dissent at Levy’s latest manager.  We’ve put one former manager in his place this week and next week I quite fancy us to do the same again.

Mr Redknapp, you can leave now...