Carabao Cup 5th Round - Southampton 1 Liverpool 2

 

VAR or no VAR - We Always Seem to be on the Wrong End of It

Carabao Cup quarter-final and Liverpool at home. When the draw was being made and it was all Premier League clubs, I was hoping for Brentford or Crystal Palace, so on paper at least, we had a chance but of course we get bloody Liverpool. There is light at the end of the tunnel however because Arne Slot has promised to rotate a bunch of players, but Chelsea did that against us recently and still won 5-1 so let’s not get too hopeful.

The main interest around this game of course is that Simon Rusk is in caretaker charge following the departure of Russell Martin after the abhorrent shit show that was our 5-0 defeat by Tottenham. What sort of team would we see? What sort of style of play would we see? On the face of it Russell was a popular manager with the players so reactions will be interesting. One thing for sure is that if we are as half arsed on the pitch as we were in the first half against Tottenham, then we are in for a long evening.

Team news and it looks like Rusk has gone into this thinking that he may as well put out the strongest team he can if he’s only here for one week, with the only real absentee being KWP who apparently has a knock. Don’t know where he got that considering he didn’t put a single tackle in on Sunday. Adam Armstrong is suspended because he has booked been booked twice in previous rounds of this illustrious cup competition so Cameron Archer starts up front. Slot has been true to his word and massively rotated there is only really Trent, Mac Allister Gakpo and Núñez from their normal Premier League side. Other than that, it’s reserves like Kelleher, Quansah, Gomez and a few young players.

Away we go and there is a marked difference straight away because there is no playing out from the back. McCarthy is hitting the ball long towards Aribo who has kind of pulled out to the left, if there is no short ball on.  It’s all a bit wayward and inaccurate, not helped by the fact that it is blowing a gale and absolutely pissing down. Liverpool are understandably very disjointed as well and both teams are struggling to put any sort of possession together. We reach 10 minutes and Liverpool began to get some control over the ball and it’s remarkable how passive we look. The players are back in position, but there is no press to speak of.

We are defending deep and manage to create a chance more by luck than judgement as THB smashes a clearance forward and it bypasses seven Liverpool players and go straight to Fernandes in the middle of the pitch who knocks it off to Dibling on the right, who really should make more of this than the tame effort he produces that goes straight to Kelleher.

Darwin Nunez has already been copping stick from the Northam End and “shit Andy Carroll” has rung out several times already but then he gets a bit fortunate as Trent’s driven through ball is sliced by Bednarek and comes down perfectly for Nunez. McCarthy has a good starting position but for no apparent reason he decides to retreat back into his six yard box and then slips on his arse and Nunez isn’t going to miss that even though his finishing is shaky at the best of times. 1-0 and lots of, cupping of the ear to the Northam. Twat, but we’d have all done the same.

Shit Andy Carroll Converts Simple Chance

Liverpool then stroll up the left-hand side through Mac Allister and Gakpo, with us getting nowhere near them and Endo links up with Gakpo to give the ball to Elliot on the edge of the box and with no Saints midfielder or defender player getting anywhere near, he just rolls it into the bottom corner with the aid of a slight deflection off of Manning. Fucking garbage.

There is no reaction and it’s nearly three as we stand off again and allow Liverpool to pass the ball to the edge of penalty area and Trent feeds the ball into Mac Allister, whose low shot is very well saved by McCarthy.  We are so slow and lethargic and gutless.

Halftime and basically that has been a passive load of shit.  Apparently the players all had a day off after Spurs so it’s nice to see them all refreshed.  Wankers - exactly the same fucking thing as against Spurs. Useless. The midfield has been pathetic. I can’t help but be massively disappointed in Flynn Downes. I really hoped when we signed him that he would be a different maker in the midfield this season and would drive the standards of everybody else but he seems to have sunk down to the levels of the likes of Joe Aribo who just seems to accept, when we play the better teams, that he’s not quick enough to do anything in the game so he just strolls about. He kind of maintains his position but he’s basically a training cone. His engagement with opposition players is non-existent. Training cone stuff as they passed it around him.  Downes hasn’t been much better  The pair of them are playing today against two Liverpool kids who are both about 19 so we really should’ve been bullying the fuck out of them but there was nothing in that first half.

We come out for the second half and there is immediately a bit more aggression about the team.  Liverpool have taken off Mac Allister and Trent which helps also.  Bednarek steps into midfield to pick a ball up and finds Fernandes in the centre circle. He attempts to sweep the ball right but it hits Endo in the face and bounces through to Archer in the left-hand channel and he goes directly for goal, getting to the edge of the box, switching it onto his right foot and smashing it past Kelleher and into the far top corner of the net. Brilliant finish and game on.  It doesn’t matter a shit that the assist was slightly fortunate. We will take it.

A limping Bree is replaced with Sugawara which provides us with more attacking impetus and his first action from the right is to put in a wonderful cross which Archer meets at the near post but he can’t get enough on it to divert it past Kelleher who makes a good sprawling reaction save.  Saints get the ball back out to Sugawara, who burns past Tsimikas before hanging another cross up in the air which Fernandes controls and smashes goalwards but it’s blocked for a corner.  We have impetus for the first time all season but before we can take the corner, we have to wait for the obligatory defender to get off the deck. It’s been a feature of their play that every time there’s any action in Liverpool’s penalty area, one of their defenders goes down and stays there.

Saints are throwing players forward now and consequently leaving gaps and Liverpool exploit one with substitute Jota bringing it forward before finding Chiesa on the right and his cross shot is past McCarthy but cleared off the line by THB for a corner, which we deal with.

Double substitution time by Simon Rusk and it could be called the January 2023 Transfer Window Nightmare Substitution and on come both Tall Paul and Sulemana for Archer and Flynn Downes.  This leaves us with the defensive wall of steel of Aribo and Fernandes in the centre of midfield and the boys who have done so little since they arrived two years ago, are given another opportunity and it nearly works as Manning puts Sulemana away down the left and he hammers over a first time left foot cross and it’s Tall Paul with the side foot and this is the moment, this is what we’ve been waiting for….. and he slips on his arse. Fucking hell.

The final dice roll sees Aribo and Bednarek come off for Lallana and Ben Brereton Dustbin and he too has his chance as Fernandes puts in a cross from the right and the (How the Fuck is he a) Chilean International, meets it with a header at the back post but it kind of plops off his head straight to the goalkeeper…. And he was offside anyway.

Chiesa has not scored to Liverpool yet and he will never have a better chance than what comes next as his first effort is brilliantly cleared off the line of THB and when the rebound comes back to him he blasts the next shot and Sugawara gets his head in the way, more by luck than judgement and it flies off another corner.  The commitment to defend is good to see.

Six extra minutes and the first four of those pass with nothing happening, so it’s time for some anti-Russell Martin football as McCarthy launches it into the sky and Fernandes gets in front of Quansah and is clean through. The Liverpool defender leans all over him and pulls him down and that’s got to be a red card, but no, Simon Hooper waves his arms around and exaggerated fashion and talk of fucking bottling it. Of course, there is no VAR when you need it and that’s the end of that.

Simon Hooper Shites His Pants

The proverbial game of two halves comes to an end with Liverpool, of course, going through to the semi-final. As far as Saints were concerned, the first half was pretty much as bad as it gets but in the second half, no doubt having had a bit of a rocket at half-time was much better in every aspect we put pressure on, we ran a lot more and we created a load of chances.  It was so refreshing to see us actually trying to put pressure on and get a bit of momentum going to get back into the game, rather than passing it around and hoping and not having any shots. We got a goal back and we piled it on as best we could, looking for an equaliser.  We put crosses in the box instead of turning out again and nearly forced a penalty shoot out because of it.

The main talking point of the game is the referee absolutely bottling giving us a free kick on the edge of the box which would’ve led to Liverpool having to play the last minutes with ten men. Up the other end, that’s a red card all day.  The referee said that he didn’t see Quansah’s arm over Fernandes’ shoulder, which sounds like absolute bollocks to me.  It is absolutely a clear foul.  Also, because of the way we were playing because we were putting pressure on and creating chances, there would’ve been a feeling inside the ground that we could’ve actually equalised, unlike earlier this season when there has been no such feeling.  Remember Bournemouth away?  Got back to 3-1 with 40 minutes to go and then didn't have another shot. 

I would be interested to know where the change of tactics came from. Did it come from Simon Rusk alone or did he talk to the players to see what they wanted to do, because it was very different. There was hardly any short goal kicks or passing it back to the goalkeeper once we had possession of the ball. Not every ball went long but we at least mixed it up, as you have to do.

Any positive you say about this game has to be put into the context of the fact that we were playing Liverpool’s reserve team and by the end they were bringing on Academy kids who have barely kicked a ball in first team football before.  Regardless of that though, this game was really about us and our attitude and how we approached it and in the first half there was just too much standing off. In the second half however, we set about it and were much more positive.  Fans will forgive a lot if you are having a go, even if you’re beaten by a better side in the end.

Setting up with a five-man defence really means that the wingbacks have to get forward and join in with the midfield or the midfield will get completely outnumbered.  Manning on the left was joining in whenever he could, but James Bree was not and that pulled the central midfield of Downes and Aribo all over the place in the first half. Neither of them looked particularly up for the challenge either and that first half was a massive disappointment.

With the midfield not providing much in terms of protection, the defence were overworked in the first half and in the main stood up well. All three of THB, Bednarek and Wood had very good moments defensively, possibly because they were relieved of the burden of playing suicide ball around the six-yard line.  You expect some sort of consistency out of THB and Bednarek, but Nathan Wood again had a good game and if there’s any justice in the world with a new manager coming in, will definitely be ahead of Jack Stephens in the pecking order.

Rusk Gets Soggy In The Rain

Alex McCarthy was captain for the day but unfortunately dropped a bit of a bollock with the first goal. He had a good starting position and then for reasons unknown, decided to backpedal into his own penalty area as Nunez came forward. That was the moment where we conceded the goal because Nunez is much more like to fuck it up if put under pressure.  The slip in a penalty area wasn’t the biggest factor in the goal being conceded. Ironically, it was the same part of the penalty area where Tall Paul went over in the second half when he had an open goal to put the ball into. Ironic that three blokes in trainers can do a crossbar challenge at half time and none of them slip over.

The second half was dare I say it, exciting. There was a large element of fortune about the way the ball reached Cameron Archer but that was a brilliant finish and it was so refreshing to see us really push on after we got the goal back. forcing Kelleher to be busy to preserve Liverpool’s advantage.  How many times this season has the opposition keeper not had dirty kit after 90 minutes?  A lot was impetus came with the introduction of Yuki Sugawara in the second half who played high on the right hand side, added energy, got crosses in and showed all the things that he is good at. Miraculously, even Kamaldeen Sulemana showed signs of life as we tried to rescue the game and then there was Tall Paul - shame he slipped on his arse.  We all know that Paul is not the greatest but he causes absolute chaos wherever he is, so we could certainly do worse than find a role for him for the rest of the season.

Onward to Fulham on Sunday and I suspect it will be a packed a few days before then, as the manager search intensifies, or maybe not and maybe it will be Simon Rusk in charge at the weekend. Either way, at least there was a bit of hope from that second half today and up the fucking Saints.

Carabao Cup 4th Round - Southampton 3 Stoke City 2

With a Roar That Was Heard in The Welsh Mining Village

Carabao Cup 4th Round at home to Stoke and for the winner, a place in the quarter-final. It’s a game that has many sub-plots to it, not least the fact that Russell Martin really needs to win this game because a defeat here would really see a lot of the fan base given more cause to point a finger at him. A lot of that fanbase won’t be present tonight because as I write, ticket sales have not been great. I get it if you live out of town because travelling to mid-week games can be an absolute pain in the arse with Southampton seemingly infested with roadworks and train cancellations. There is also the idea the Carabao Cup in particular has become so devalued over the years with Premier League clubs in particular playing fringe players in all rounds up until the quarter-final or semi-final and of course it’s extra money on top of the season ticket.

Stoke aren’t doing particularly well in the Championship this season and currently sit 19th, just the five places above Portsmouth, who they had their last win against which was a very enjoyable watch as they won 6-1. It was a shame they took the foot off the gas in the last half an hour to be honest. Since then though, Stoke have not managed another win in four attempts which is usually enough of a drop in form for them to sack their manager like they have done once already this season with Stephen Schumacher departing after just a few games.  In that regard they certainly seem to be the Watford of the North. We played them twice last year reason of course.  Our away win at the Britannia was against Alex Neil, our home defeat was against Stephen Schumacher and this game is against Narcis Pelach.  They up a few familiar players with Sam Gallagher now playing for them and he is usually upfront alongside Tom Cannon who they got on loan from Leicester at the start of season, who scored four goals in the aforementioned defeat of our nearest and dearest. They also have Lewis Koumas on loan from Liverpool, who scored against us in the FA Cup last season when Liverpool put out of team with an average age of 17 and still beat us comfortably.

Russell Martin seems to be aware of the importance of winning this game and has said post Manchester City that would we be going with a strong lineup for this game and it wouldn’t be 11 changes or anything like that. I’m not convinced to be honest because the likes of Adam Armstrong, Tall Paul, Ben Brereton-Diaz, Ryan Fraser, Max Cornet, Big Les, Joe Aribo, Charlie Taylor and Alex McCarthy would be looking to be playing in this game.

As it was, it was six changes with Wee Man, Arma, Aribo, Big Les, Sugawara and Bree all starting in front of a half full St Mary’s.

It really is like the majority of our Championship home games last season as Saints keep hold of the ball and Stoke defend in depth. We work the ball wide to Adam Armstrong whose low cross is cleared out to the edge of the box where Aribo fires in our first shot of the evening but comfortably saved by the keeper.

A Defender Is Now Our Main Goal Threat

It's a possession-fest with not much threat and we win a corner as we approach 20 minutes, which the linesman has just guesses at because he wasn’t remotely interested in giving it until everybody appealed.  Over it comes from Fernandes along the line of the 6 yard line and THB has got completely free and unimpeded by anybody, nods it powerfully into the net.  Dunno where the keeper was but we'll take it.

A lovely ball around the corner by Sugawara sends Armstrong away in absolutely acres of space and with all the time in the world.  He advances on goal and then with two players in the middle, he doesn’t have a clue and smashes it straight at the keeper at the near post. Piss poor it has to be said.  I don’t blame him for having a shot but it has to go across the keeper.

It seems that there is no danger as Sugawara gets seen off by Dixon in the Stoke penalty area but the defender reckons without the tenacity of Yuki to win it back and when the Saints defender gets in front of him and takes possession of the ball again, Dixon swings a leg and boots him and it looks a bit soft but I can see why the referee gave it.  We have a penalty taker on the pitch today and it’s Arma and bang, first goal of the season and he certainly takes a good penalty.  2-0 now and it should be more or less done from here.

Cruising to a Comfortable Win at this Point

It’s time for the first charge of the day as Wee Man goes off.  It’s a bit strange because he doesn’t look injured and on comes Maxwel Cornet on the left and we have that rarest of things, right footed winger on the right, left footed on the left.

It all seems so easy as we appreach half time.  Stoke break up the right and Vidigal gets trashed by Big Les and it’s a free kick about 40 yards out.  It’s chipped into the mixer in nondescript fashion and there’s a header and it bounces off Sugawara who has got himself in a mess and Phillips flicks it past Ramsdale from close range. We have literally conceded with more or less the first time they’ve got into the penalty area.  Shit.

Half-time and that’s put a slightly different slant on it. It’s been a ridiculously one-sided first half but we have left the door open and Stoke can walk through it and will now think they have a chance in the second half.  Stoke goal aside we’ve been dominant but have slipped into that mode where we create nothing.  No one is prepared to shoot from any distance and we’re not trying to find Archer in the middle.

Ten minutes of the same boring shit goes by and Stoke come again down our left and a cross-shot deflects off of Bree and lands perfectly at the feet of Cannon beyond the far post and he rams it into the roof of the net.  I think they’ve been in the penalty area twice and now it’s 2-2.

Russell gets on his radio from the stands and on comes Tall Paul and BBD for Archer and Fernandes, meaning Arma moving back into the midfield three.  Now we have the big man on up[ front we of course don’t play to his strengths and we are still creating nothing from our possession.    Stoke now look dangerous ever time they advance and Moran starts dribbling past players and gets into our penalty area and seems to go round about four players before Sugawara eventually gets a tackle in and we hack it away. We got a bit fortunate there as THB left his leg out and if Moran had gone down then it would’ve been another penalty.

Talking of penalties – they are now looking likely and there’s more headscratching substitutions as Arma and Bednarek are replaced with Sulemana and Sam Amo.  It looks like Sulemana is at left back with Bree at centre back next to THB.  It’s anyone’s guess who is in midfield and whilst we work that out, Cornet fucks up and puts THB in the shit and Manhoef is his clean through and it looks like he’s bundled it past Ramsdale, who has made himself very small and it looks like it’s rolling in but Sugawara gets back to clear it off the line.  All eyes on the referees watch… nothing.

Sulemana to his credit, tries to put a cross in towards Tall Paul but it’s headed back out to him.  The £25 million man takes his time and rolls it back to Bree on the edge of the box and the man nurtured by the man from the Welsh Mining Village, smashes it from outside box and into the net.  Get in.  I wait for the apocalypse but it doesn’t happen, so I therefore deduce that we can actually shoot from outside the box if we want to.

Now to manage the eight extra minutes with three defenders, two midfielders and five forwards.  Big Les is at centre back now and the back four is protected by a clearly knackered Joe Aribo, and Sam Amo and no one else really.  We see it out and thank fuck that’s over with. 

Through to the quarter-finals we go and that’s just about all you can say about it. You don't want to be too negative because we haven't won many games this season but here comes the truth.  Fucking hell that second half was absolutely grim until someone finally had a shot from outside the box and lo and behold, buy a ticket and sometimes you win. I guess you could say it was a classic illustration of getting over the line without playing well and we would kill for a win of that nature against Everton in the league on Saturday and no mistake.  However, from the moment Stoke pulled a goal back just before half-time until James Bree finally took that shot from outside the box, we were fucking atrocious - as bad and ineffective with and without the ball as you could possibly be.

We showed absolutely no clue how to get efforts on goal. Yes we scored twice in the first half, once from a corner and once from a penalty but from open play, nothing. We have a central striker in Cameron Archer who has been on good form but we have no idea how to get the ball to him. We never play the ball into his feet from midfield and when we get into the wide areas we cross the ball in the air which is of course not his strength.

A vast majority game was played in front of the Stoke team who would drop back to the edge of the box whilst we passed the ball around, side to side in between the halfway line and about 30 yards out. We carried on this ineffective and quite frankly, piss boring style of attacking throughout the second half despite changing virtually every attacking player.  Many got gametime for the first time in a while, so you would expect them to be keen to impress.  Maybe they were keen, but that didn't really translate to anything.  Of our underperforming wingers, Max Cornet was given a chance for about 65 minutes and did nothing with it. Ben Brereton Diaz came on and was fucking awful.  Ryan Fraser started the game before going off ill and he did nothing either.  Adam Armstrong scored a penalty and other than that showed an ability to have absolutely no idea what to do when it came to delivering a ball into the box.  
 
Tall Paul came on for the last 20 minutes, which you would have thought would have been the signal to change how we attack. Did we put crosses into him? I can remember one and that was so high that all he could do was knock it off for a goal kick. You simply have to mix it up when you are attacking or else you become very very easy to defend against.  Wingers need to take on the full-back occasionally instead of always turning back, we need to play the ball into the strikers feet occasionally and we need to shoot from outside the box more often. Stoke’s defence was not tested at all for about an hour.  Bree’s goal was probably down to the surprise element because Stoke probably weren’t thinking there was any danger and didn’t set up to defend a long-range shot because unless it's our third choice right back, no one thinks of doing it. Maybe the fact that Russell Martin was sat in the stands, with a different vantage point to usual, will turn out to be a good thing. 

We Look Shit From Up Here

Having said our attack was dreadful – so was the defence. Defensive cover was provided by Big Les, who started like a monster and had a good first half but has a tendency to give away free kicks in bad areas and with the way be defend set pieces, that's not great.  Every time Stoke came forward in open play, which wasn't often, it was like a bomb had gone off in a penalty area with bodies everywhere and no one looking like they had any sort of composure whatsoever when put under any pressure. They scored with their first attack which was a hopeful free kick tossed into the box on the 44th minute and then they scored with their first attack of the second half and they very nearly won the game themselves when Sugawara managed to get back to clear an effort off the line.

In the first half we were absolutely miles better than Stoke but their goal before half-time seemed to kick the belief out of us and the second half was absolutely painful to watch. I have been thinking a lot recently about how you can get away with things at Championship level that you can’t get away with the Premier League level. Today was a prime example because we were absolutely shocking in that second half but still managed to win. We were absolutely shocking in the second half against Leicester and look what happened.

So, having got through somehow, and seen how Wednesday’s games panned out, we had the draw for the Quarters and it’s all Prem sides.  Palace were the only ‘bottom half’ side in the draw and we didn’t get them…. No, we got the holders at home – Liverpool.  The Scousers will be shitting it after watching us despatch Stoke.  Sarcasm alert.

Up the fucking Saints

Carabao Cup 3rd Round - Everton 1 Southampton 1 (Southampton win 6-5 on penalties)

 

I've Been Diving the Wrong Way Since Before You Were Born Son

Time for the Carabao Cup all-Premier League mega clash between Everton and Southampton, being beamed live by every broadcaster all over the globe. Or not as the case may be. Everton are currently 20th and Saints are currently 19th in the Premier League, both with zero points. Everton have been different to Saints in that they have got themselves into winning positions in their last two games, having been 2-0 up in both of them and have spectacularly managed to lose both.

Back in the day, both teams would’ve seen this game as a chance to improve morale and get that winning feeling back again to give the league program a boost but these days, with virtually all Premier League teams changing 10 or 11 of the starting players, that’s not really relevant anymore.

Sean Dyche needs to win this game because there is a growing clamour for him to be sacked because Everton of course, are still a big name, even though they have been pretty shit for a number of years. Dyche did a good job with them last year and overcame points deductions, without which, they would’ve finished comfortably mid-table. Another preseason of financial weirdness has happened though with important players like Onana moving on. They are still battling with PSR restrictions and have been involved in some of those “Cheating In Plain Sight” deals, swapping youngsters with other PSR threatened clubs like Aston Villa, for ludicrously overinflated fees. I guess if the rules allow it then you can’t complain though not exactly in the spirit of things bearing in mind the reason that the rules were brought in.

Whatever team Dyche puts out will of course carry the Dyche hallmark of being physical and pretty direct so maybe it’s not a game for us to put out a bunch of kids.  The incoming physical challenge is one reason why Saints team selection will be interesting because since the Cardiff game in the last round, the status of a few of our players has changed. Matty Fernandes and Tyler Dibling are first team starters, as are Cameron Archer and Big Les. Joe Lumley is now no longer required to bring the vibes to the Carabao Cup so I am sure that we will see Alex McCarthy in goal today.

Team news and we do indeed see McCarthy and there are just two players who could reasonably expect to start against Ipswich on Saturday.  THB captains the side and there is also a place for Big Les.  Other than that, it’s the usual ‘reserves’ like Bree, Taylor and Wood, the recently dropped like Armstrong and Aribo and the fitness seekers like Cornet, Fraser and Lallana.

Away we go and the pattern of the game is obvious straight away with Saints having possession but then looking very shaky whenever we don’t have it.  Dyche is still reassuringly old skool in his approach.  His goalkeeper gets the ball, the defenders push up to halfway and he thunders it up the pitch towards a big unit striker.  Beto is his name and they signed him for £30m after they’d tried to sign Che Adams from us for £15m but we weren’t happy to accept £1 a year instalments.

Our first effort is from a Taylor cross which deflects up to the edge of the box and is met by Aribo flying in but he must have had his eyes shut because a perfect 50p header flew well over the bar.

Beto, for it is he, has the first shot of the day as he picks up the ball inside the box and from a tight angle, drills it at the near post but McCarthy easily pushes it wide.  Another Everton attack and Lindstrom is blocked by Wood and wins a corner. McNeil puts in the in-swinger, which is flapped at by McCarthy, kept alive be on the back post by O’Brien, headed goalwards by Keane and nodded into the net by Doucoure, who at least has a good Grace to use his head this time, instead of slapping in his hand like he usually fucking does. Bollocks.

Saints respond pretty well but get caught on the break again with Lindstrom running through from the left hand side before trying to open up and curl it into the far corner but instead of that, he passed it straight to McCarthy. Another chance as Everton build down the right and a pass in behind the hopelessly out of position Wood, who appeals for offside but THB clears up before his line-breaking pass finds Big Les, who turns and again plays forward to Fraser who gets absolutely trashed by the young impetuous Everton full back Dixon. In it comes from Taylor and THB is free at the back post to head powerfully down and bouncing into the top corner.  1-1, Get in.

The game settles down again into the same pattern of Saints possession and Everton waiting for us to screw up close to our goal.  There is minor excitement as Cornet shows a bit of what he’s about by flying in from the right and lashing wildly over the bar with his left foot.

Half time and that was OK I guess though it’s hard to square off that we have apparently had 77% percent possession and six shots to their seven.  So, say it was 45 minutes…. That means we’ve had the ball for 35 minutes and had 6 shots, so just under 6 minutes of possession per shot.  Everton have therefore had the ball for 10 minutes and had 7 shots, so roughly 1.5 minutes of possession per shot.  Lallana has been different gravy in midfield with his skill and ball retention but no more as he’s off the be replaced with Fernandes.  I assume this will mean Les playing a bit deeper.

Wood has gone a good 20 minutes without a mistake but 15 of that was spent in the dressing room at half time.  His lightweight, off-balance effort at defending puts us right in the shit and a flick on by Beto sends Lindstrom through and going behind beckons until McCarthy meets him and superbly blocks the effort again.

Saints are offering a bit going forward but not too much. Matty Fernandes jinks past the right back before finding Wee Man and he bundles his way through and through and from a narrow angle, goes for the far post and the goalkeeper sticks his foot out and deflects it away.

In pretty quick succession, the forward line is changed with Armstrong, Cornet and Fraser all going off along with Big Les and in their place emerge Ross Stewart, Tyler Dibling, BBD and Flynn Downes.

Saints are looking to get the ball out to Tyler Dibling at every opportunity as he’s now up against Ashley Young, who is twice his age.  Young has just come on as a sub to a crescendo of abuse from Everton fans, which was aimed at the manager for bringing him on for a striker – even though the striker in question was Beto, and he is shit.  Downes eventually does find Dibling, who weaves past two players as if they weren’t there before cutting in and lashing over the bar.  He's at it again straight after, lining up Young and going past him as if he's not there and into the area and Young has a nibble and over he goes.  Penalty surely..... corner, fuck off.  One thing for sure is that he didn't play the ball so that's a penalty or a goal kick or you've just fucking bottled it.  Where's VAR when you need it?  Oh yes, this competition doesn't bring in VAR til later in the competition, as opposed to the FA Cup that uses it when the ground has capability.  Shambles.

Three minutes of injury time and can we just be put this out of its misery. It’s largely been a shit second half and bring on the penalties so there is at least a bit of excitement.

Fernandes up first, I have confidence …. Bang, no problem and high past the goalkeeper down the middle. 1-0

Michael Keane…. he’s a big donkey but I reckon he’s going to score this and…. he comprehensively sends McCarthy the wrong way. 1-1

Ross Stewart… will probably get injured running up to this ball.  Here he comes… Virginia gets a fingertip to it but he’s not keeping that out, 2-1

Dwight McNeil, got his mouth hanging open but that’s no reason to expect him to miss… miss it you fucker….. no problem and McCarthy the wrong way again. 2-2

Ben Brereton Diaz.  I assume he’s going to show us what we were missing on Saturday and… sure enough, right-footed and drilled past the goalkeeper who goes the wrong way. 3-2

Ndiaye for Everton and … Groundhog Day as McCarthy emphatically goes the wrong way again.  Whatever is written on his water bottle is clearly wrong. 3-3

THB…. Hmmm, don’t like centre backs taking one.  Come on Captain…. Bang, absolutely drilled it past Virginia, who is competing with Alex in the ‘going the wrong way’ stakes. 4-3

Lindstrom… this has to be a chance as he’s shit himself every time he’s seen the posts today and oooooh close.  No, Macca’s gone the wrong way again but it’s hit the other post and bounced in. 4-4

Joe Aribo looks cool but left footed kickers always worry me…. but he scores easily enough as the keeper once again goes the wrong way. 5-4

Jack Harrison to take the fifth and easy…. with McCarthy again showing maximum commitment to going the wrong way, flying through the air and gracefully landing in the opposite corner to the ball to keep up his 100% record. 5-5

Sudden death and down to the people who you don’t really wanna take one and it’s James Bree.  He strikes a good ball so I’m hopeful and … easy, Virginia goes for a hot dog again in the wrong direction. 6-5

Ashley Dung steps up. He’s always been shit and this is a chance…. and McCarthy stands his ground and sticks a hand out and deflects it onto the post and we are through.  Get in.

You Can Still Get Excited About Winning a Carabao Cup Game

Well that was fun in the end and a perfect illustration of how one average penalty and your goalkeeper finally going the right way, can change the entire feeling of an evening.  Small margins and all that. The game itself was pretty torrid to watch and it was one of those ones where we have 75% possession and have less shots than the opposition.   Too much sideways and backwards and this was acknowledged by the manager afterwards.  The main problem was is that we couldn’t get the ball through to the forwards players and didn’t stretch the Everton back four enough during the game.  One issue was that we seemed slightly unwilling to pass the ball forward for whatever reason and another issue was that there were not many options higher up the pitch.  

Part of that was because Adam Armstrong has completely lost his confidence from last season.  He very rarely came short to receive the ball and he never attacked dangerous spaces in between defenders and spent most of his time standing behind defenders so there was absolutely no option to get the ball to him.  It looks to me that he has completely accepted that he is not good enough at this level but he absolutely needs to get that out of his system otherwise we may as well put him behind some glass, like a fire extinguisher with ‘do not break until relegated’, written on the front of it. You may very well not be good enough at this level but you at least have to have the mindset that you are good enough. It wasn’t solely his fault of course, Ryan Fraser and Max Cornet both showed flashes on the wings but Fraser was too willing to turn back and not take on his full-back, whereas Cornet is still trying to work the rust out of his game after his long injury.  Fraser was particularly frustrating, playing as he was against Everton fullback Dixon who was incredibly rash.  I liked his enthusiasm because he played the game at 100 miles an hour but steaming into tackles every single time at full pelt is not going to end well and indeed, that is where our goal came from.  The free kick that led to our goal was a forward pass from THB to Les, a turn and forward pass to Fraser, who ran at the full back and got trashed.  All positive, forward-thinking bits of play.

In midfield, everyone did well on the possession front but there was a lack of intent to play forward and nothing much when we got to the edge of the box. Joe Aribo played furthest forward of the three, making a complete bollocks of one decent headed chance in the first half but was on the whole ineffective regarding goal threat, as was big Les and Adam Lallana. Somewhat mystifyingly, Lallana played the deepest of the three with big Les attempting to be a box-to-box midfielder which on the face of it, doesn’t appear to be his game. Adam Lallana was wonderfully neat and tidy in his 45 minutes but I would have liked to have seen him in a more creative role with Big Les deeper. It’s not as if Everton were playing a lot of football in midfield.

The tone of Everton‘s performance was set by their goalkeeper Virginia, who was the very antithesis of the modern goalkeeper who plays the ball short to his defenders. Every time Virginia got possession he just screamed the ball as hard as he could towards Beto, Everton’s big but useless £30 million striker who was at least causing a few problems for Nathan Wood with his physicality.

Sad to say, Nathan Wood was bullied all over the place as usual. He is a tidy footballer but he really needs to get in the gym because there’s not a striker in the Premier League who wouldn’t be able to just manoeuvre him off the ball. THB had a decent game at the back and I thought it was a very good idea to make him captain as he’s going to be playing in the Premier League on Saturday and it can’t have been anything but a boost to his confidence. The goal he scored will also have done that. He had a couple of loose moments but in the main stood up well to the somewhat limited one-dimensional Everton approach. James Bree and Charlie Taylor were what they are, solid and unspectacular. Bree struggled early on against Dwight McNeil but grew into the game and ended up as one of our better performers. It’s a shame for him that he has KWP and Sugawara ahead of him for the right back position so no matter how well he does, he is never gonna be more than a Carabao Cup player this season.

THB - Back on Track

And then there’s Alex McCarthy. Having spectacularly and emphatically dived into the opposite corner to the ball for the first five penalties, he managed to make himself a hero by saving the decisive one from Ashley Dung.  It was a bit like a striker who misses five chances and then scores one off his arse and it turns out to be the winner.  His contribution to the Everton goal was a bit wet but he made a couple of decent saves in the second half when Everton got through and can be pleased overall with his nights work.

Of the substitutes, the obvious stand out was Tyler Dibling. I didn’t particularly want him to be involved tonight but he was more or less the only player to get anyone off their seat in the second half.  One move cutting in from the right wing before firing over the bar was excellent and he should undoubtedly have had a penalty in the 90th minute as he pulled exactly the same move that he pulled on Diogo Dalot at the weekend and Ashley Dung carted him over. Maybe I’m missing something here but I am amazed that no one appealed for that.

This game is of course, small beer compared to what we’ve got coming up at the weekend with the visit of Ipswich Town. Relegation six pointer in coming and we are going to need everyone - manager, staff, players and fans to step up. We need those three points.

Up the fucking Saints

Carabao Cup 2nd Round - Cardiff 3 Southampton 5

 

Somewhere, Nathan Jones is Very Proud

Carabao Cup second round and Cardiff at the Cardiff City Stadium. Last time here we took our last remaining hopes of automatic promotion and threw them down the shitter. It was quite an amazing game when you look back on it. Cardiff had what amounted to their youth team playing, Saints scored and had 400 shots, missing all the rest of them and in the last 10 minutes Cardiff had two shots and won the game. It was truly one of those days where as a fan, you asked yourself the question “why do I fucking bother?”. The reason you bother is that of course within a month, we had one the play-off final at Wembley and what turned out to be one of the greatest days the club has ever had.

Today is two things. It’s a chance to put the stodgy start to the Premier League behind us for an evening and go out and try and score some goals and it’s also a chance for players not in the Premier League side, to really advance their chances of being so when the game against Brentford rolls around at the weekend. Most people will be focused on the new players with both Mateus Fernandes and Lesley Ugochukwu expected to start. There will also be a start for Cameron Archer and we should get to see the young exciting talent of Tyler Dibling and Sam Amo-Ameyaw.  It’s the front half of the team that I am really interested in given the pretty poor start of the Premier League season in that regard.

Russell Martin has hinted that there will be 11 changes today and he has also had a say about the clubs transfer activity. It was largely expected that a new goalkeeper would be in the door by now with the club having agreed a deal with Feyenoord for Justin Bijlow.  Everyone had got their head around that and then it ultimately fallen through because of an issue on the medical with an old injury that he had. The deal that the club had agreed with Feyenoord was an initial loan deal which was to become a permanent deal if he played 20 games. It’s a bit strange that the deal was structured that way because we knew he had had medical issues over the last couple of years and then we pulled out anyway. It looks like something worse showed up when he did his medical over here. I guess that in some ways we should be grateful that the medical process that we have, that led to assigning Ross Stewart, is being a little bit more stringent these days. On the face of it it’s a shame for the player who had said all his goodbyes to Feyenoord and prepare himself for a dream move to the Premier League.

Saints meanwhile have less than a week left of the transfer window end need to explore other goalkeeper options…. And spoiler alert, more on that later.  We are also of course in dire need of attacking reinforcements with wingers now being the main thing that we need as I’m sure that Russell Martin would like to play 4-3-3 and everyone who can play in those wide attacking positions seems to be really struggling at the moment.

Outgoing transfer news with Shea Charles joining Sheffield Wednesday on season long loan, which I think will be really good for him and for Sheffield Wednesday. Saints have got promoted one season two early for Shea to make much of an impact this season at Premier League level but this is certainly a loan for a season and nothing more, and he will be back with us next summer.

Also on the way out is Charly Alcaraz to Flamengo in Brazil and again this is a deal that seems to suit all parties. He is not a Russell Martin type of player and when that is the case that a player doesn’t fit in with the manager, then there needs to be a parting of the ways, especially if money is tight and the asset can fetch a decent fee. As far as we all have our own ideas of what we think the team should be but at the end of the day, we don’t matter and it’s the managers opinion that is paramount. You can though definitely argue that the team wouldn’t have scored less goals if Charly was playing in the opening two league games.  He looked a great signing when he first arrived in the Kamaldeen – Tall Paul Shitshow Transfer Window of January 2023 and we even gave him a new contract when we got relegated but it never really happened in the Championship and the loan out to Juventus was as weird as it was unsuccessful.  It’s easy to forget that the made the full Argentina squad for one game last season and it’s easy to let those early performances he put in, in the relegation season, cloud judgement on his abilities when there was no European club particularly interested in him this time around.  Charly seemed a good lad though and never disrespected anyone (apart from that Lazio player he tried to punch) so good luck to him.

Tonight we have the full eleven changes – Lumley, Bree, Taylor, Wood, Edwards, Ugochukwu, Dibling, Fernandes, Amo-Ameyaw, Archer, Edozie.  Even the bench is new with only Alex McCarthy from the first XI.  New names appearing include midfielders Joe O’Brien-Whitmarsh and Romeo Akechukwu, both brought in from Irish clubs.

Saints are flying at the start and straight away you can see a marked difference about the way we are trying to play. Yes the opposition aren’t as good, obviously, but in the midfield both Fernandes and Dibling are looking to go forward at every opportunity.

Dibling has already had an early shot which has been saved when Bree picks him out with a ball forward which Nathan Jones would’ve been proud of because it had verticality he was always shitting on about and Tyler gets away from the defender before knocking it infield Fernandes on the edge of the box who takes a touch and then drives it past Alnwick in the Cardiff goal to make it 1-0 after about seven minutes. Hello.

The W Stands for 'Why Am I Not in the Team Yet'?

Cardiff respond of sorts as they win a free kick over on the left when Big Les is penalised for basically being strong and winning the ball back. Rubin Colwill optimistically tries to shot from the left wing which is not the worst idea in the world considering Lumley is in goal.. and he has been known to try and save free-kicks using his teeth instead of his arms (see Watford FA Cup away).  He does however save it and then launches it long and Archer flicks it on to Sam Amo who is clean through on goal and he skips around the keeper but goes too wide and a covering defender knocks it off for a corner. All positive stuff however and the value of quick attacking play and having a focal point striker, well illustrated.

Cardiff try again down our right with Reindorf burrowing into the box before turning out and knocking it back to Colwill about 35 yards out. No one closes him down and he just hits it. As Lumley looks at it, it goes left and then curves right and the goalkeeper is planted with no chance at all as the ball flicks off the crossbar and flies into the net. What a brilliant strike. Shite closing down but can’t really complain about that.

Back on it and Charlie Taylor is carrying the ball down the left and he slides a ball into the penalty area to pick up a Fernandes run, a backheel to Archer and another backheel back to Taylor, followed by a pass across the top of the box and there is Sam Amo, first time left footed and giving the goalkeeper no chance at all. Another brilliant goal.

I'm Sorry - He Just Doesn't Look Old Enough

Having gone ahead again, it is of course time to step off the gas with Cardiff being allowed to build up play down our left and the cross comes in and Lumley should either catch it or punch it but instead of that he flaps it back into the danger area, only it doesn’t get into the danger area because it hits Ronnie Edwards and bounces into the net. For fucks sake. What a shit goal.  Well this is fun – equal parts brilliant and shite.

Quite often at half time in these game, you see how much the manager actually wants to win the game and they might bring on the ‘big’ players that are on the bench.  As explained though, none of our first team are on there so away we go with the same eleven.

The one Saints attacking player who has not showed anything yet is Sam Edozie on the left but he has a chance when teed up by Big Les and Archer and he chopped the ball onto his right foot before passing it narrowly wide of the far post. Good effort but he has to score really.  It doesn’t take too long for us to regain the lead with Sam Amo passing across the top of the penalty area to Fernandes, who has the vision a knock it forward into Archer's feet, one touch, spin, bang, 3-2.  Great finish and all of a sudden I’m feeling better about our striking options.

The tactic of losing intensity once ahead and giving Cardiff opportunities has clearly been carried over from the first half as the dangerous Colwill picks it up just left of centre and chips it to the back post, a header down and then smashed in first time by Robertson, which gave Lumley absolutely no chance at all and this is all great fun but still shit and it’s now 3-3. Apparently, Robertson used to play for the Skates, which is nice isn’t it?  Twat.

The game can’t carry on at this pace and it dies off a little bit with just the occasional chance. Archer trust to liven it up by going on a solo mission which ends with his shot deflected wide.  Cardiff's next chance is a Nathan Wood production, as he fannies around with the ball and a halfway line, gets tackled by Reindorf who can’t get away because Wood holds onto his shirt and shorts for a good 5 seconds while play goes on and Ashford runs past the wrestling match and gets to the edge of the Saints penalty area and looks for all the world he’s going to make it 4-3 to Cardiff until Lumley partially redeems himself, getting a big hand to it and pushing it wide

There’s a couple of subs made and significance in those coming on and off.  Big Les and Fernandes have been taken off, presumably to be saved for involvement on Saturday and their replacements are Adam Lallana making his first Saints appearance for ten years and Armel Bella-Kotchap, probably making his last Saints performance before he disappears at the end of the transfer window.  With twenty to go, you would think the next goal is going to win it and Reindorf again causes Wood all sorts of problems before the ball drops to substitute Twose who absolutely smashes it and we’re all waiting for the net to bulge as it goes just wide.

With all the reshuffling that is going on with the substitutions, Ronnie Edwards has moved into midfield and not his fault but he’s look like a fish up a tree and so on comes Romeo Akechukwu for his debut and we now have a midfield three of 36-year-old Lallana, whose age is matched by adding together the age of the other two midfielders, Akechukwu and Dibling. Romeo looks like a powerful player and his first action is to burst forward from the halfway line before getting absolutely totalled.

It’s looks like it’s going to penalties now as we approach 90. Dibling has had half an hour off but he’s come back to life again, seemingly energised by the presence of Lallana who has basically completely taken control of the game. Some fancy Lallana flick that I don’t even have a name for, puts Tyler away and he gets tackled for a corner.  We work the corner short back to Bree, who tosses a hopeful ball into the box which is headed away back to his general vicinity and he goes in on the Cardiff players touch, gets in front of him and then just smashes it on the up and sends it flying over the goalkeeper and into the top corner. Ridiculously brilliant strike and Nathan Jones is sat in a pub in a small Welsh mining village in his Stone Island Jacket, proudly telling anyone who’ll listen that he taught him that.

Centre Forwards Are Useful

Still enough time for us to throw this away of course because that's what we do best but Cardiff’s first attack does an amount to anything and Saints are on the break through Dibling, who carries it forward before sliding it through to Archer and it’s an exact replica of the winning goal in the play-off final as Archer advances on the goalkeeper before drilling it across him into the far corner.  Again, a superb finish and this quite mental game is now 5-3 and all over.

Well, as said, that was great fun and absolutely mental. Cardiff fully played their part. They put out what was basically a second-string side and all praise of Saints players has to be put into that context. Cardiff scored an absolutely ridiculous goal through Rubin Colwill and the third goal was decent as well.

Firstly, it was a brilliantly entertaining game and it had all the ingredients for that to happen with committed attacking play, mixed with terrible defending at times from both teams. What I was most pleased about was that a number of the Saints players put their hands up for consideration for the First XI in the Premier League. Of those who played tonight I would say that Lesley Ugochukwu, Cameron Archer, Tyler Dibling and Mateus Fernandes have certainly made Russell Martin think about who he sends out onto the pitch against Brentford on Saturday. Of those, I would say that Archer and Fernandes absolutely have to start. Elsewhere, there was a solid performance by Charlie Taylor and Sam Amo-Ameyaw certainly proved that he’s worth having on the bench in the Premier League. There were also good performances from a couple of substitutes. Adam Lallana came on and completely bossed the game from the central of the park and ABK looked a class apart. With both of those two you have to bear in mind the strength of the opposition.  Lallana is never going to be any more than a 20 minute player for us at the end of games and I’m convinced that this appearance of ABK was just to put him in the shop window and show that he is capable of playing football after his Hoffenheim medical caused that moved to be put off.  It’s a shame that he seems to have no intent to knuckle down and get on with it here but I think that ship has sailed.

Big Les was everything I wanted him to be in midfield. He gets about the park, he is strong, he makes tackles and he is relatively decent on the ball. Maybe not for Saturday but I can certainly see him and Flynn Downes both being in our midfield very soon. His relatively early substitution tonight certainly suggests he is going to play a role on Saturday.  If things work out then I can see them being augmented in midfield by Mateus Fernandes, who added some real class to the midfield, scoring one goal with a very good finish, having a big hand in the Sam Amo goal and setting up another for Archer and being constantly involved and looking to pass the ball into dangerous areas.

He had a chance to do the last of those because of the performance of Cameron Archer who had a quiet start before coming to life just before half-time, taking Fernandes pass and simply turning and hitting it with a directness not really seen from any of our strikers very often. It was so nice to see him occupying the defenders and being a focal point especially in the context of the game against Forest on Saturday.

I would still urge a bit of caution about Tyler Dibling. He had a superb first half but had half an hour at the start of the second where he gave the ball away virtually every time he had it when he got a little bit tired. He sprung back to life in the last 10 minutes and set up another goal, the fifth one for Cameron Archer.  He’s a brilliant young player but I would certainly still use him as a substitute for now but his minutes certainly need to be increased and I really wouldn’t complain if he did start.  It’s too simplistic to say this but basically in the Premier League, our defence is solid and our attack is terrible whereas in this game, the complete opposite was true.

Don't Close Him Down Then

Of the others, well Joe Lumley proved that he is the ultimate vibes goalkeeper. By that I mean that he’s a great lad, fun on the golf course, good sense of humour, gets his round in, everybody likes him, doesn’t make a fuss when he’s not playing, not very good but no one cares because he’s fourth choice. Fourth choice? Can you count? Bazunu, McCarthy, Lumley? Why is he the fourth choice?

Oh yes, just before the game, news emerged that we are almost certain to sign Aaron Ramsdale on a permanent move from Arsenal for £18 million quid initially. Fuck me, what a buy that is. It appears that Arsenal were more in favour of a permanent departure than a loan departure and that’s why we managed to steal a march on clubs like Wolves, who wanted the latter option. Personally, I think this also explains why we did the dirty on Justin Bijlow. I have course have no proof of that but it just seems a little bit coincidental. It’s a harsh way to treat a player if it’s true but this is a ruthless business and you don’t get anywhere by being super nice about everything.

James Bree… Take a bow son. What a brilliant fucking goal from a player who has done absolutely fucking nothing since he came to the club. He’s still not very good but that was a ridiculous goal and it’s a shame in a way that it didn’t turn out to be the winner. Goals like that are absolutely brilliant because they come from the most unexpected source. It’s not quite Francis Benali or Claus Lundekvam scoring after 400 odd games, but unexpected nonetheless.

On the other side of the defence was Charlie Taylor who was solid and I would certainly not have a problem if he started in the Premier League. It’s a toss-up between Yuki Sugawara and Charlie.  Yuki has done nothing wrong but whilst KWP is here, Charlie would give you a better balance of course being naturally left-footed. The good news is that we are covered in both sides if we lose KWP at the end of the transfer window.  A fullback pairing of Yuki and Charlie really wouldn’t be too bad.

The central defenders Ronnie Edwards and Nathan Wood both had good moments and moments they would prefer to forget. Edwards moved into midfield later in the game and proved that he can’t really play there and Nathan Wood just has to work to get the sloppiness out of his game. He does some good things and then does something monumentally shit but it was funny seeing him grab hold of a Cardiff player and not let go for about ten seconds after he fucked up. Ronnie was unfortunate with his own goal which he couldn’t really help bearing in mind Mr Vibes in goal, threw it at him from very close range.

On the wings we had Sam Amo and Sam Edozie. Sam Amo scored a brilliant goal and did some really good things throughout the game, proving that he should stay in the match day squad as the winger to bring on. He should certainly be ahead of Edozie in the pecking order who seems to have gone right off the boil when compared to the standard he sat in the middle of last season before he got crocked by that awful tackle by Jack Stacey up at Norwich. During the game I was pondering that there are three certainties in life-death, taxes and Edozie picking out an opposition defender with a cross. We could have seven players in the penalty area with one defender and Sam would pick out the defender. Every. Fucking. Time.

Over to you Russell. Time to change the team and the tactics for the Premier League game against Brentford on Saturday. Even if we don’t win, we need to have a fucking go and not set up to not have a shot and try and nick a nil nil. The difficult part of being a manager is making decisions that are going to be unpopular with some people and upsetting players who have been with you awhile but that’s the nature of the beast. This is top level sport and you have to be ruthless and there are a few Russell Martin favourites who will be severely sweating over their places for Saturday.  All of Adam Armstrong, Jack Stephens, Taylor Harwood Bellis, Joe Aribo and Will Smallbone are vulnerable because of the excellent performances put in tonight. That’s a good thing and that is how it is supposed to be. No one should be too comfortable.

Carabao Cup 3^rd Round Draw – Everton away.  Shit draw for the fans but this competition is all about the development of youngsters and giving squad players a game, so it’s probably a decent draw for that reason as it's a step up in quality from tonight.

Up the fucking Saints

Carabao Cup 1st Round South - Gillingham 3 Southampton 1

Russ Waves Goodbye to Five Players

A trip to the Priestfield Stadium to take on Gillingham in the Carabao cup First Round Southern section, which sounds as tinpot as it comes. Regardless of this, it’s an important game for Russell Martin and the gang and a chance for some of the outlying members of our squad to show that they can step up and play the Russball style of football now being preached across the whole club.

It pains me to say it but we will have to concentrate solely on the league this season and our efforts to get promoted. When we were in the Premier League, I was thought there was a chance that we could get to the League Cup Final and indeed we have in recent times and we’ve had a few decent runs but this season it’s different and whilst I’m not saying we should sack it off, we certainly shouldn’t prioritise it in any way. Consequently tonight, I am hoping for and expecting to see a massively changed line-up from the game against Sheffield Wednesday.

The team was announced and it was a bit of a strange one and it was very difficult to see where everyone was going play from the 11 names that were announced. There’s was either going to be some one strange playing in midfield or at centre back and it was the latter, with Perraud as the left sided centre back alongside Lyanco.  Jayden Meghoma was in at left back with Shay Charles, Stuart Armstrong and Sekou Mara the midfield three, with Sam Amo, Djenepo and Captain Che up front.

Not in the team and not on the bench was Romeo Lavia, fresh from another leaked bid by Liverpool which is still about £5 million short of what we have been asking for all along and about a tenner more than the one that was rejected last time. They don’t fucking get it do they. Needless to say, one Romeo wasn’t in tonight’s squad, Liverpool fans flooded the Saints Twitter timeline with their opinion that it meant it was happening. I think it will happen, but I live in hope that it happens… and he moves somewhere else…. anywhere else.

Away we go and it was all a bit half-arsed right from the start with everybody getting used to where they should be and nothing much happened until 12 minutes when James Bree dribbles into a cul-de-sac and loses the ball.  One pass down the line sends the winger away and a low cross is met at the back post by the unmarked Nadesan to put the Gills one nil up. Absolute dog shit to be honest, both in the way we lost the ball and in the way we didn’t defend.

Saints do start to play through Charles and Sam Amo and the ball is eventually worked out to the left where Djenepo takes on his man and knocks it back and Mara who takes a shot from too far out and straight out the goalkeeper.

Gillingham are happy letting Saints have the ball in her own half and for now we are building up well with Sam Amo again been put away down the right-hand side and he beats the full back twice before pulling the ball back and it bounces off a defender to Mara who smashes it out for a throw on the far side.  Fucking useless

Unperturbed, Saints carry on building up nicely through midfield with Stuart Armstrong heavily involved and out it goes to the Clown Prince of Mali, Moussa Djenepo. He’s obviously spent a lot of time getting dreadlocks put into his hair, time that could probably have been better spent actually going out and learning how to play football and his eventual shot is straight down the goalkeepers throat.

We seemed to be exclusively having shots from 25 yards out and there’s another one as Armstrong tees up for second Mara and attempts a left-footed volley which is well out of his ability range and unsurprisingly, it goes wide.

Despite us having all of the possession since the goal, Gillingham have the ball in the net again just before half-time but it’s disallowed for a push which on first viewing, you couldn’t see.  You can already see it’s going to be a long night.

Half-time and this has been absolutely shit. Half paced and half arsed and is it any wonder, given some of the shite we’ve got it on the pitch?  Russell Martin makes two changes at half-time with Stuart Armstrong coming off, I assume because he’s building up his minutes and being replaced by Joe Aribo. Also off is Sekou Mara with Kami Doyle coming on.

Good Effort Alex

A ridiculously harsh free-kick is giving away by Lyanco about 45 yards out on the right hand side giving us another chance to demonstrate our defensive set-piece prowess.  In it comes, headed down by a free man at the back post and McKenzie get something on it and it rolls apologetically into the net whilst McCarthy flops over like a falling tree. Embarrassingly shit. 

It gets worse though as Djenepo shields the ball out after he’d won a tackle to give Gillingham a corner. Utter prick. Why he did this is anyone’s guess but my guess would be it’s because he hasn’t got a fucking clue what he’s doing.  In swinger, headed down, half cleared and then smashed back in by McKenzie and it flies into the net before McCarthy can move.  3-0 to Gillingham.  Pathetic.

It’s now all Gillingham as they brilliantly build up down down left hand side before the cross comes in and it’s met on the volley about 15 yards out and by Nichols and fuck me, Alex McCarthy actually got in the way and the ball hit him and bounced to safety.  Breaking news, the hologram has made a save ladies and gentlemen.

More subs as Charly Alcaraz and believe it or not, Tall Paul, come on to try and stop it getting even more embarrassing. It comes down to Kami Doyle to twist and turn in midfield and find a good forward pass to where Alcaraz picks it up, draws a defender and then buries it past the keeper. Typically, it’s one of our good players who scored the goal.  There’s about 10 minutes to go including injury time and another goal straight away might have made it interesting but nothing doing, out we go somewhat pathetically.

Fucking hell - that was dreadful.

In the scheme of things, it doesn’t really matter that we lost and I think that long-term this will do us a lot of good because it proved what we all know already, that a lot of these players just aren’t good enough and now the new management has seen this first hand in a competitive game.

Russell Martin’s interview after the game was particularly scathing and it doesn’t take a genius to work out by process of elimination, who he is talking about when he says that some have their futures elsewhere.

First of the positives – he was impressed with the young players who started the game, in particular Sam Amo but also Shea Charles and Jayden Meghoma.  He also excused Stuart Armstrong and Joe Aribo as they are building up their fitness and need the minutes.  He clearly hasn’t worked out Aribo as yet.

As Far As January Signing Go, Charly is Clear

Those that are left and not spared are Alex McCarthy, Lyanco, James Bree, Moussa Djenepo, Tall Paul and probably Che Adams as well. I think everybody knows that the first five names on the list are not up to it and Che either needs to move or get his head right.  Yes, we have a lot of players in our squad, as has been mentioned by the manager recently… but we have a lot of shit players in our squad.  The most pointed individual criticism from the manager was saved for Sekou Mara, with Martin basically saying that he doesn’t train properly, with the proper intensity to take it into a game.  If your new boss has formed that opinion of you within a few weeks then that’s pretty damning.

Prior to the game there was talk of Uncle Roy Hodgson being interested in taking McCarthy to Palace.  McCarthy played for England under Hodgson at one stage so I hope this isn’t a sign that Roy is losing it.  We’ve got to hope that no one from Palace is looking at the second goal tonight.  In hindsight it would have been good to give Joe Lumley a game tonight and though it's an obvious joke, Joanna Lumley would have done better on the second goal.

 Lyanco - we all know the drill by now - passion merchant who tries to make up for his deficiencies by giving his all.  This is admirable of course but ultimately his footballing ability will always let him down in the end and it did frequently today.  Djenepo - well giving him that new contract least season was always an absolute joke and that's what we've had for the first year of that new deal - just a joke.  Still, only another two years of him to put up with.   Tall Paul - an object lesson in how not to invest money.  £18 million quid fee and 3 years in wages... well played Rasmus.

James Bree gave a good interview after the game and I actually felt sorry for him.  He's desperately trying to prove that he's good enough and knows he hasn't done so as yet and that this was a missed chance.  He implied that he'd have had a better chance in a full strength side and whilst that's undoubtedly true, I still haven't seen anything from him that backs up the assertion that Nathan Jones signed the best right back in the Championship for us. With Tino gone and KWP being too good for the Championship, he may get his wish but he has to show a hell of a lot more than he has done so far.

The one outlier is Romain Perraud who was not mentioned specifically but he was given a hospital pass today by Martin because he is never a centre back and he has virtually missed all of pre-season as well.  That’s the one thing I will criticise Russell Martin for is the lack of a proper central defender to partner Lyanco. Surely it would’ve been better playing someone from the academy who is used to playing in that position. Alternatively, he could’ve risked one of Jack Stephens or Jan Bednarek for this one game.

The fan reaction to this defeat has been predictably over the top. How can you even be surprised bearing in mind the number of starting eleven players who we all know are shit. I feel sorry for those who spent good money to go to the game and they are entitled to feel angry about it, but the rest of us need to give our heads a wobble and calm down.

There is nothing much to say about this game other than the fact that it was only a kid who has just turned 17 in Sam Amo-Ameyaw, who pushed his claims to be in the first team in the Championship against Norwich on Saturday. He is certainly the only one to put his hand up and make the manager think.

Bring on Norwich on Saturday at 3pm.