Sir Les Does It Again
At the end of the training camp in France, we had a friendly
against St Etienne, a team that people of a certain age (like me) contains
images of European Cup Winners with Michel Platini before he turned into a
corrupt lump of lard. What a brilliant
footballer he was. Anyway, it was
interesting in that Mauricio went with a 4-2-3-1 but Charlie Austin was in the
10 position with Manolo Gabbiadini up front.
Most would have had it the other way round but I’m up for it if it gets
our two biggest goal threats on the pitch.
It was 0-0 at half time and then the missing ingredient came to the
floor and it was Stuart Taylor going in goal.
Once that happened we were deadly with Matt Targett putting over a great
cross for Gabbi to expertly flick home with his head. Another Targett cross was put away by JWP,
making his first appearance since coming back from England U21 duty and the
same player slung over a corner for Maya Yoshida to head home for a thoroughly
decent 3-0 result.
Back home and word came out that there would be meetings and
The Shithouse was hopefully going to be re-integrated into the squad. Don’t hold your breath as this is a Weapons
Grade Shithouse (WGS) we are talking about here and so it proved with more
reports that the re-integration wasn’t happening just yet and both sides were
described as ‘entrenched’. Not good but
not surprising. I’ve had enough of
referring to the Shithouse by name as he doesn’t deserve it so from here on it,
WGS it is. I know that stood for ‘Wee
Gordon Strachan’ and we loved him but that was years ago.
This (the tantrum) is of course what Liverpool want as they
steadfastly sit there and do nothing and the media keep it ticking along. Have you noticed that you never get an
ex-Liverpool media pundit saying ‘Don’t sign him – he’s a shithouse’. Funny that.
It’s almost as if they’re working for Liverpool. With Coutinho linked the Braca and now Mané
with Milan, the hypocrisy is quite staggering.
New levels of straw clutching and patheticness were reached when Alfie
Jones came on as a sub against St Etienne wearing 17, which of course was WGS
squad number last season. It’s a sign!!!
All this WGS stuff is exhausting and distracting. I’ve almost forgotten about us bringing
players in which we need to do. We must
be planning for WGS exit and Kevin Wimmer from Spurs has risen to the surface
again, as has another Dutchman, Wesley Hoedt from Lazio. Reassuringly, both are the physical type of
centre back we need if WGS leaves.
Augsburg at home and I made the trip as a consolation prize
for missing the first two home games and within 10 minutes I wished I hadn’t
bothered as it was fucking dreadful.
Augsburg treated it like a proper game and played with the intensity
that you should play with if you’re just about to start your season. We on the other hand, played it like a
training game and looked like we couldn’t be arsed. To be fair, Pellegrino was obviously playing
fringe players tonight and we’d see the first team on Sunday against
Sevilla. Of the starting team tonight, I
can see only Forster, Romeu, Yoshida and maybe JWP and Redmond starting against
Swansea. You would have thought though,
that the others would have been keen to put in a performance to tell the new
manager to pick them but not a bit of it.
Pied and Target at full backs were dreadful, especially defensively and
their crosses at the other end of the pitch failed to pick out anyone. Yoshida and Bednarek were awful with Maya not
concentrating in the slightest and Bednarek looking like a park player who was thrown
in to a game that he clearly wasn’t good enough for. I’m not writing him off but there’s no way
he’ll be near the first team any time soon.
In midfield we were wide open.
Hojbjerg did the odd good thing but both he and Romeu were guilty of
giving the ball away too cheaply. Up
front Redmond looked sharp enough and Shane Long started well but tailed off
hugely. And then there was Charlie
Austin, lurching about like someone who had necked about ten pints, coming out
of a kebab shop at 2am. Of the substitutes,
Sofiane Boufal looked lively and Stephens looked better than Yoshida but
overall it was piss poor and the manager acknowledged that at the end.
Augsburg were decent though, not shy of a tackle and they
looked ready for their season. The first
goal was a hell of a shot, moving about 4 times in the air. It’ll look bad on Fraser but honestly, I was
right behind it and he had no chance.
The second goal was hilariously bad.
It started off with Pied giving the ball away under no pressure and ended
with a corner. Over it came and Austin
totally failed to jump with his man and a free header for 2-0. To be fair to Charlie, he had a full pint in
one hand and a kebab and a lit cigarette in the other and he didn’t spill a
drop or get ash on his kebab or anything.
The third goal was a free kick slung in from the right and Stephens and
Bednarek were nowhere as a free header was nodded into the net. Under 12s defending right there – no
defensive leader and no one taking responsibility. No 4 highlighted our lack of midfield as the
lad just walked forward to the edge of the box with no challenge and buried it.
We are in desperate need of a proper central defender –
still. Regardless of the WGS situation
we need one anyway. I saw three centre
backs tonight who need a dominant partner who will struggle on their own. It reminds me of how much we got away it last
season. Also, the formation that
Mauricio seems to favour with three attacking midfielders and a striker really
demands that we have two proper defensive midfielders and we currently have
just the one. I do wonder where JWP,
Hojbjerg, Clasie and Davis fit in.
Meanwhile back in WGS land – I am relieved to tell you that
Phil Thompson is still alive –and in a shock twist, he’s got the same opinion
as all the other thirteen ex-Liverpool pundits.
Michael Owen has also shocked no one by having the same tedious boring
opinion as everyone else. Out of all
these ex-Liverpool pundits – not one has questioned the fact that WGS is
obviously a bit of a dodgy character.
Not one. In addition, his
international manager Dick Advocaat has said that his actions are perfectly
acceptable and understandable and hopes he moves to Liverpool. If that’s not bringing the game into
disrepute I don’t know what is. Think
about it – an international manager encouraging players to go on strike.
Saturday and the Sevilla friendly and Saints made an effort
to make us forget that Augsburg happened, making a big show of presenting the
new manager and coaching staff to the crowd like it was his first game. It of course helped that it wasn’t pissing
down and a lot more people turned up to watch. Still staggered with how inept
the fringe players were on Wednesday, I wasn’t expecting much but we looked
decent on the whole. Having the proper full
backs made a huge difference and Jack Stephens had a superb game bringing the
ball out of defence and generally looking like a quality footballer. Maya on the other hand was sloppy as you like
and he’s going to find himself on the bench pretty quickly as soon as we buy
another centre back… not before though because after picking up a knock he was
replaced by Bednarek who once again, showed that he’s not ready. Out of position and not winning headers which
should be meat and drink to a big centre back.
Put it this way – I think Florin Gardos would be better than him.
So – we have a bit of a weakness at centre back and we have
another in defensive midfield where Davis is Davis – tidy on the ball and with
great energy but lacking when not on the ball.
He has a habit of leaving the player he’s supposed to be marking and
against good sides, that’s going to bite us.
He also of course gets bossed out of games against physical midfielders. Though he has his limitations, I think
possibly Clasie would be a better bet to play next to Romeu and I was a bit
disappointed he wasn’t given the 2nd half to stake a claim. Romeu was back to something approaching his
best after being dodgy in midweek. He
got a couple of challenges in that would have got him booked in the league. He would have pulled out of a couple of
tackles in a proper game but today I think he just thought ‘fuck it’ and
enjoyed steaming in to people.
On the wings, Tadic was preferred to Boufal and overall he
did very little to justify that aside from being involved in the 2nd
goal and Redmond hardly seemed to get involved at all. Gabbiadini was superb though and it was great to see him finish off
the 2nd goal. His movement
and willingness to run into spaces and keep defenders on their toes makes our
attacking play and he seemed to link well with JWP who in the first half in
particular was pushed right forward into the No 10 role. There’s still not really enough goal threat
from Tadic, Redmond and JWP but we looked decent.
The game was won with a Stephens shanked volley following a
Gabbi flick on from a JWP corner and a lovely move on the break where Tadic and
Davis combined well to set to Gabbi to finish well under the keeper. It was the kind of opportunity that Shane
Long would have controlled to the keeper or smashed it at the moon. Jake Flannigan got a few minutes at right
back and looked better than Jeremy Pied and I think it was telling that Austin
was left on the bench with his 8 cans of lager and kebab.
The post-Sevilla optimism bubble was burst with what was the
next logical step at Shithouse Central as WGS officially handed in a transfer
request, therefore effectively handing Sainst between £6 million and £7 million
quid. I’d like to place on record my
thanks to WGS and his agent for this generous gesture. There was a statement of course, which seeked
to shift the blame and point the Shithouse finger at the club. It was a pure work of comedy and therefore I
feel it’s best to highlight the best bit which was his disappointment at discussions
with Saints ending up in the media. Yep,
he had a go at Saints almost from a moral standpoint about lleaking stuff to
the media. He wants to join Liverpool
ladies and gentleman. Anyway, I covered
his statement here….
Anyway, nothing’s really changed, the transfer request
hasn’t been accepted and no one including his precious Liverpool have made a
bid.
Les Reed’s status as a legend got cemented a bit more with
WGS handing in a transfer request and then it got even better for our Director
of Football when he got upgraded to God of Football with the signing of Mario
Lemina from Juventus. He played as a sub
in the Champions League final a few months ago, same as Toby Alderweireld did
for Atletico Madrid before he signed for us.
That loan deal went sour of course but this is a proper transfer and
addresses the defensive midfield issue identified earlier. I’m only going on reports and You Tube videos
but a midfield of Romeu and Lemina sounds pretty tasty. It challenges players like Steven Davis, JWP
and Pierre Hojbjerg to up their game and makes both the starting XI and the
squad stronger.
So here we are and here we go. WGS has a virus and Coutinho has just handed
in a transfer request at Liverpool. Oh
the irony as social media becomes fun again. A new season, the same old
depressing stuff about the state of the game but the Saints are Coming. 7th this season please lads.
Saints new signing playing against Coutinho's New Team mates
