Don't Think You're Fucking Scoring Shortarse!
Liverpool away and I’m being tested. My hatred of all things Red Scouse had
somewhat lessened with the departure of Brendan Rodgers and whilst Jurgen Klopp
had initially irritated me, I had over time actually started to warm to the
guy. Also, despite the well document
trail of players from Southampton to Liverpool, we had managed 3 wins and a
draw from the last 4 games against them and that was always amusing. The media, who you’d think are all on the
Anfield payroll, won’t tell you that Saints have won 3 and drawn 1 of the last
4 – they’ll tell you that Liverpool have only won 1 in 5 but that win was a
huge 6-1 win. Fake News – sort of.
The trouble is that we are in May and so it’s all about the
upcoming transfer window and which Southampton players can Liverpool sign this
year. Phil Thompson (ex-Liverpool) says
Virgil, Bertrand and Romeu. Steven
Gerrard (ex-Liverpool player, now a coach) says Virgil, Michael Owen, Graeme
Souness, Jamie Redknapp, Dietmar Hamman, Danny Murphy (ex-Liverpool x5) all say
a combination of the three. Fuck off!
It’s not been a particularly harmonious week at St.Mary’s. A
story in L’Equipe about Claude’s future not being certain was re-hashed several
times this week, including by the Daily Echo and on top of the shithouse
performance against Hull, there has been a lot of negativity. Claude responded when questioned about it
with what seemed like genuine bemusement as to why his job might be under
threat. That was kind of nice in a way
but also I was thinking ‘see how you’d feel if you paid to watch that utter
shit last weekend’. Ryan Bertrand,
being the player who most of the rumours of manager fall-out were about, was
offered up for interview and of course said “I hate the twat and so do all the
lads and we’ve decided to all not give a shit and hopefully he gets fired but
either way – we’re all fucking off to Liverpool anyway”. I might have made that quote up.
We as a club and Claude in particular, need a performance
today, mainly for our own reasons and with Liverpool needing a win to help them
in their quest for the top 4, it would be brilliant to put a big fucking hole
in that ambition. I’m watching on Sky
Sports and I’m not too irritated by things as yet and then they do a little pan
round to all all the ex-Saints in the warm up as we get Clyne – no reaction,
Lovren – a bit of a reaction, Lallana – fucking wanker!!! Maybe Sadio Mane was in the crowd somewhere
but they didn’t show him. Mind you, if
you were injured and out for the season, would you hang around Liverpool or go
on holiday somewhere?
Our line-up is pretty predictable (that word again) with JWP
back in after the Hull fiasco, replacing Redmond who appears to have dropped
behind Boufal in the pecking order. I
don’t rate Wijnaldum or Can and Lucas won’t hurt you from midfield so it’s a case
of keeping Coutinho quiet and obviously, Lallana will be a threat when he stops
slathering Nivea all over himself and comes off the bench.
Straight away the game settles into a pattern of Liverpool
possession, Emre Can trying and failing to hit a Gerrard Hollywood ball, us
winning possession and giving it away again as Liverpool press. Repeat.
There’s no real action of any note until Romeu dallies on the edge of
our penalty area and gets burgled by Firmino but his shot hits Yoshida and
deflects away.
Our first break of any note takes nearly half an hour to
arrive with Boufal making Clyne look a mug and the ball eventually ends up with
JWP on the left and it looks for a moment like Tadic has got away from Milner
but the cross is too deep. Half an hour
and all we can get excited about is a cross that goes to no one.
Much to the frustration of Sky Sports, Liverpool aren’t
creating much and Firmino has a go from long range but by the time is reaches
Fraser, it’s barely moving at all. Emre
Cant tries the same trick as we approach half time and a deflection takes any
pace off it and it’s easily picked up by the keeper. Liverpool are so average. Everything down the middle and if not, using
Milner on the left who of course has to check back onto his right foot before
crossing it. Stephens and Yoshida
dealing easily with Origi and Coutinho and Firmino doing nothing. Going forward…. Let’s not talk about that.
There is nothing going on in the first 15 minutes of
the second half. Klopp has obviously
liked what he’s seen so far from his side as Lallana and Sturridge are still on
the bench whilst those on the pitch are doing the square root of fuck all. It’s time for a pre-planned sub from Claude
as Redmond comes on for Boufal, spot on 60 minutes. Five minutes later and I realise who the
referee is… it’s Bobby Madley – he of the Arsenal away penalty incident when he
let Arsenal get away with about 4 infringements before penalising Jose Fonte
for basically nothing. Lucas swings a
cross over from on the right and Stephens and Origi challenge for it. It pops up in the air and as Stephens turns
it hits his elbow and pops up to Fraser.
Big appeal from a couple of players – penalty. Fuck off Madley. Saints are all round the ref but no
chance. To be honest, it’s the sort of handball
I think should be given but in the current climate where nothing gets given,
it’s harsh. Yes he’s moved his arm
towards the ball but did he mean it – no chance. Also – would it have been given up the other
end at Anfield? I’m pretty sure we all know
the answer to that one.
Anyway, Milner has a pretty good record with penalties
but before he takes it he has to wait for Cedric to get booked for dissent and
JWP getting booked for pissing about with a water bottle in the goalmouth. We haven’t managed to match the four players
getting booked after the Arsenal decision which is disappointing. Whilst all this is going on, Fraser has
raised himself up to full height and is standing on Milner’s toes giving him
some advice, whilst scuffing the penalty spot.
It’s peak intimidation time but Fraser can’t help being 6 foot 7. Eventually we’re ready and up steps Milner,
right footed to the keepers right and down goes the big man, strong hand and
saved superbly. Ha ha ha. Klopp-cam shows that he can’t look so I hope
he enjoyed looking at disappointed faces.
Why not watch? Oh yes, playing up
to the cameras. Bell end.
A flurry of substitutions including another
pre-planned one from us with Long on for Gabbiadini whilst Klopp gives
Sturridge and Niveatwat 20 minutes instead of Origi and Lucas. Liverpool look marginally better with these
two on but all they’ve got to show for it is another Coutinho long ranger which
Fraser catches dismissively and a neat turn by Sturridge past Stephens but he
can only toe poke a shot through to the keeper.
We actually manage a break following a Liverpool
corner with Redmond getting away on the right.
His crossfield ball finds Tadic and with any quality, he would have
found the unmarked Long for a tap in but he overhits it and then Shane gives it
away. It’s not over though as Lallana
fannies around with it and gets caught by Romeu who could again put Long in but
he takes too long and the chance goes.
We have time for a classic piece of Sturridge greed as
he shanks wide of the near post when he had about 5 players in the box to pass
to and there’s one heart in mouth moment as Milner gets a good cross over and
Grujic (on for Wijnaldum) gets a head to it and Fraser has to take off to tip
it over the bar. Job done… well it’s
done when Bertrand takes a yellow card for the team, wasting time by whacking
the ball away.
Ha fucking ha. Fuck you Klopp, fuck you Liverpool and
fuck you Sky Scouse Sports and Liverpool Media Inc. Four games against that team that you pillage
for players every year and you still can't fucking score. Let's face it though, we bored the living
shit out of it but for once I'll take it. You can sum up our attacking play
such as it was by saying that that none of Tadic, Boufal or Redmond created a
fucking thing for Gabbiadini or Long. When Gabbiadini gets the ball he is
absolute class with his link up play but the service to him was absolutely
wank. So he runs around for 60 minutes
trying to get into a place to maybe receive a pass and then gets taken
off. The tactics and the alleged
creative players are failing him. None
out of Romeu, Davis or JWP got forward at all but most the time, even a simple
10 yard ball to the striker just wasn't good enough.
Today however was all about the defence and how well
that we played at the back and in midfield in a defensive capacity. I have to
say that penalty aside, it was incredibly fucking easy. Managerial genius
Jurgen Klopp and his expensively assembled side just funnelled everything
through the middle and were incredibly easy to defend against as long as we
concentrated and did the basics right. The penalty they got awarded was at
least a bit dodgy in that there was absolutely no fucking way that he meant it
and there was no way in a million years that it would have been given at the
other end. Liverpool away is added to
Arsenal away, Spurs away and United away where we’ve had a dodgy penalty given
against us. Spot the connection.
Fraser’s gamesmanship at the penalty was absolutely
first class and Milner’s penalty was very similar to the one Tadic took against
Hull in that it wasn't hit quite hard enough and it wasn't quite in the corner.
Apparently it was the first penalty save
that Fraser had made in the Premier League and I go further than that and say
is the first time he's gone the right fucking way. Unbelievably, he credited Stuart Taylor with
having some input into helping him know which way the penalty was going to go.
I'm sure that this will be Stuart Taylor’s only contribution as a Southampton
player. Fraser fielded all the long
shots at him with complete comfort and even the reflex save from the flicked
header by Grujic in the last minute that everyone got excited about was
straight at him - good reaction save though.
Claude again did his substitutions by numbers –
Redmond for Boufal – 60 minutes – check!
Long for Gabbiadini – check!
Again, post-moan in the press, Tadic wasn’t substituted despite being
our worst player. I can’t deny that this
is a good result though but we really have to address the scraps that
Gabbiadini is living off of. He looks a
superb player but he needs more than one pass every half an hour. The defenders were good and concentrated
throughout but if you look at the penalty decision, it’s just a ball into the
box that a centre back should head away.
When Stephens gets outmuscled and the ball starts bobbing about, the
alleged handball happens. You simply
can’t get outmuscled by a striker like Origi who let’s face it, is no Andy
Carroll.
Jurgen Klopp is a bang average massively overrated
football manager given all the resources at his disposal. After spending
millions, he still has James Milner playing left back, Lovren with a new
contract and he still has Lucas Leiva in the team. Tactically I have no idea what was going on
with him. What do you need a defensive
midfielder who plays like a crab when you're playing against a team who are not
breaking forward from midfield at all. Every time I see Emre Can play I think
what a pile of average shit he is and Gini Wijnaldum bought his Newcastle form
to Anfield today and the first time I noticed him was when he got substituted. Upfront
they had Origi who pretty crap, the totally overrated Firmino and Phillippe Coutinho
who occasionally looked like it might do something but mostly with a speculative
long shot straight at the keeper. I can't comment on that defence or keeper
because we didn't get near it but we all know that they are not the best.
Klopp blamed the result on the pitch, Fraser’s
gamesmanship and time wasting.
Meanwhile, Sky Sports are a fucking disgrace. We had Jamie Carragher on co-commentary and
in the studio we had Jamie Redknapp and Graham Souness so no Liverpool bias at
all in that lot. Maybe they think that the half of season the Redknapp spent with
Saints and the one season Souness spent as our manager somehow make them
neutral. Why is it that every time the ball went out to play, Sky Sports cut to
bloody Klopp. They must've had a camera permanently trained on him. I think I
saw as much of him as I saw of the actual game. I know Claude is not the most
exciting or animated of managers but I think I saw him once. Yes Klopp is a
personality with his fake anger and chucking water bottles and indignations and
decisions that were correct but for fucks sake, at least try and be a little
bit even-handed.
Unfortunately, Manchester United losing to Arsenal
straight after our game means that we probably didn't put much of a dent in their
Champions League aspirations. I really hope that the Scouse bastards don't make
it but they probably will. Anyway –
enough about Fucking Liverpool.
We cannot pretend that we haven’t got problems still
but this is a good result and it proved that the players are still playing for
Claude. Arsenal at home which is up next
is a really interesting test. They are
as fragile as you like so we really have to have a bit of a go at them – we
can’t just sit back and play for a third 0-0 in succession without having a
shot on target. I wouldn’t be surprised
if we did though.
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