FA Cup 3rd Round - Southampton 3 Swansea 0

 

Tyler Knows 'Man of the Match' is in the bag after two tap-ins.

FA Cup 3rd Round and Swansea City at home. This is a huge game for Ivan Juric and not a huge game for absolutely everybody else. I’m sure that this will be reflected in the attendance today which promises to be very low indeed. It’s not a particularly interesting tie for away fans, so there’s not gonna be many of those here and the clubs tone deaf insistence on charging between £20 and £25 for an adult ticket for this game, is going to ensure that a vast majority save their money to pay the Christmas bills.

If there was any air left in any of the balloons after the appointment of a new manager, it has totally gone now after the absolute mauling we got by Brentford and our last home game, hence the importance of this game to the new manager. It’s hard to imagine him not going as full strength as possible for this particular game to try and get something happening, get anything happening.

Silly season is here of course with the transfer window and as far as we know it’s just about outgoings though the message needs to be sent that Sport Republic are in some way in control and either not giving up on this season or planning for next season in the Championship.  Our one January arrival Welington, played his first game for the Under 21s last night, completing the first half of a 5-0 win which included a Dominic Ballard hat-trick. 

Talk of the transfer window can wait however because today is about the FA Cup, which is of course the oldest and greatest cup competition of them all, or rather it was. Now, the Premier League and the FA have combined, in the face of greed, to all but kill it and certainly kill the magic of it. The big clubs would rather finish fourth in the Premier League than win the FA Cup and that says it all really. A cup run for a team like Saints is exciting for the fans but even if it goes well, there’s always that moment when you get to the quarter-finals and you begin to dread the bun fight for tickets at Wembley and the damage it will do to your bank balance, just for a semi-final.

Swansea are mid table in the Championship and so will be looking for a run for a play-off place in the second half of the season. They also have the small matter of the South Wales Derby to play against Cardiff next week.  Consequently, they are going to be resting players for today. When we played them last season, their best player was Matt Grimes who used to play for Russell Martin at Swansea and was clearly, brought up to pass the ball and was on a completely different wavelength to the rest of his more limited teammates.  Russell Martin’s shadow looms large over this game – I wonder who he wants to win?  I wonder if Lucy Pinder has an influence?

Team news and no Tall Paul and in fact, no striker at all so we can only assume that Sulemana is up top.  Well that’s a bit of a reach.  Fernandes is back in for Armstrong and Ryan Manning is in for Nathan Wood, which I assume means Jimmy Champo slotting into a back three and KWP on the right.

Away we go and what is this?  Saints looking like the better side by a long way and an early chance as KWP brings down a cross on his right foot before firing wastefully over with his left.  If anyone was looking for which team was haunted by the ghost of Russell Martin then it was Swansea, who coughed up first with McLaughlin in goal passing to a defender who turned and played it backwards straight to Sulemana, who cuts inside a couple of defenders and has to score from the box and ….. no,  he drags his shot just wide.

In true anti-Russell fashion, the next chance came with some genuine route one stuff from us with Ramsdale’s big boot forward being challenged for by Big Les and as the ball bounced behind him, Sulemana used his pace to get there first and when he got there, the goalkeeper McLaughlin had come out and was standing in the very definition of no man’s land, which made up the strikers mind for him and he executed a lob sailing over the keeper, no bounce into the net for his first goal in what seems like forever.  Yes, it was made easier by shit goalkeeping but still a decent finish.

Kamaldeen Comments on the 20,000 Empty Seats

Ten minutes go by with no Swansea threat at all and Big Les drives to within 25 yards of goal on the left, lends Aribo the ball, on to Sulemana on the left and he plays a give and go with Les and is in round the back and he fires of ball across the 6 yard line to where Tyler Dibling has made it into the centre forward position to knock it past the keeper with ease. Excellent goal and good play all round.

With a two goal lead established, there’s not much going on before half-time and unlike the Stoke Carabao Cup game where we threw one in, we go into the break two goals up with no alarms at all.  Another goal at the start of the second half would of course see this game completely done and we have to wait ten minutes for the next chance as Manning’s corner from the right is met by Captain Janny at the back post and his thumping hits the keeper and bounces out, hits a defender suspiciously high on the arm and it smashed away.   No VAR so we don’t have to sit through all that shit and we can marvel that we’ve nearly actually scored from a set piece.

It’s still all a bit of a stroll, which suits Aribo of course and he storms out of defence and gives the ball to Manning out on the left and his low cross into the box is not cleared and Dibling stumbles through a couple of half-arsed tackles before smashing it into the net from just outside the 6 yard box. 3-0 and Wembley here we come.

Get Players in Danger Areas, Score Goals

The goal is Dibling’s last involvement and off he goes along with Sulemana, who gets what is probably his first ovation as he leaves the pitch and on come our reserve strikers, Armstrong and Archer. There’s another change in midfield with Big Les coming off for the returning Little Will Smallbone.   Matty Fernandes, as he has done all afternoon, brings some class to the proceedings by threading a lovely ball through to Archer who turns down the opportunity of a first time shot, and eventually runs into the keeper to block it out for a corner.

As we approach the last ten minutes, there is time for both teams to pay tribute to Russell Martin.  Firstly, McLaughlin plays that straight pass into midfield that we’ve seen so often from our keepers this season and it gets picked off and the ball ends up with Adam Armstrong on the edge of the box and his low shot is pushed wide by the keeper making up for his own mistake.  Arma, to the shock of no one, is offside.

Our own tribute sees Ramsdale playing a ball to the edge of the box where Smallbone doesn’t move quickly enough and he can’t control and Joe Allen picks it up and drives a low shot past Ramsdale, pinging off the inside of the post and going across the goal and wide to preserve our clean sheet in the most shit way possible.

Lallana is on for Aribo and Saints respond to the near miss with a really good incisive move up the pitch to send Armstrong away and he takes on Christie for pace, which he can do against championship defenders, but when confronted by the goalkeeper he bobbles the shot wide in eye-rollingly typical fashion.  No matter though, mission accomplished though for Ivan Juric and Saints are through to the 4^th Round.

Russell salutes Bravery of Both Teams As They Give Away Chances

Because the FA Cup is shit these days, the draw has already been made and because the Arsenal v Man United game has finished during our second half and we have got Burnley at home in what promises to be a keenly fought Free Nathan Tella Derby.  I wonder if they’ll price it to get the ground nearly full or are we going to end up with another 12,000-ish gate like today.

That’s for another day though.  Today? Well, that was easy and if you wanted an illustration of the difference between the Championship and the bottom of the Premier League, then this was it. I’d be interested to know what Swansea fans thought of their performance. Maybe they will think it wasn’t too bad but from our point of view, in the context of our season, they were shite and there was never any doubt that we would win the game, even before we took the lead.

On paper it didn’t look encouraging with Sulemana as the only real striker on the pitch, but today it worked.  It was a nice finish for the first goal, with the keeper lending a hand with the decision making but the give and go and injecting pace into the move for the second goal was exactly what we have been crying out for him to do since he got here two years ago.  He’ll get a run of games now to try and prove himself at the higher level in the league and he simply has to take the chance.

Sulemana’s work on the second goal provided a tap-in for Tyler Dibling and likewise, the third goal from Ryan Manning’s cross. Whilst Tyler might have had a relatively quiet match, the fact that he got himself into that position twice to finish off crosses into the box is something that we have been failing to do all season.  Tyler gave a beautiful "teenager" interview afterwards when presented with the Man of the Match award, being somewhat bemused that his two tap-ins got him the nod.  He and Kamaldeen are an unlikely strike pairing but no one else has taken their opportunity, so why not?

You would’ve liked to have seen Saints pushed on and tried to score some more goals but once the third one went in, it just became a case of playing out the rest of the time.  I think we can be forgiven for that given what has gone on in the league this season and there’s a bigger couple of games coming up in the week.

I assume that Juric will take some things from this game and take them forward into the Premier League in the next few weeks. I would not be surprised at all if we saw Sulemana being used as a striker but as it stands, I’d be absolutely amazed if that works in the Premier League but I’m sure we are about to find out.  KWP on the right and Manning on the left today looked very well balanced and in his games so far, Ivan has tried all of Manning, Charlie Taylor, Jimmy Champo, Yuki Sugawara and Nathan Wood in a bid to find two defenders to partner the ever-present Bednarek, KWP and THB.  I think that Manning has nailed one spot for now and it’ll be between Wood and Jimmy Champo for the third centre back spot.

The lack of midfield options was evident again today with Downes being missing. Joe Aribo was generally decent against a poor side but in the second half he did seem to have spells where he is always positioned just where the ball had moved from.  When Big Les, who had a good game, went off, we had Aribo and Smallbone as the midfield.   Try that in the Premier League Ivan and we will be conceding ten.  However, Aribo was made to look like Ngolo Kante when Lallana came on for him, with the veteran giving a pretty good, impression of someone who has never played football in his life before.

Onwards and Thursday against Manchester United at Old Trafford and the Decaying Theatre of Penny Pinching.

Pre-Season Part 1 - Business Done Early

 

Let's Get To Work

Just a few weeks ago, Saints of course won the playoffs and planning for the new season started in earnest.  Playoffs instead of automatics meant we have less time than all the others as a result of us having three extra matches and so you need to hit the ground running to sort the squad out for what is already an almighty challenge…. But then The Euro’s happened and so it was all a bit slow.   The cogs have begun to turn however.

Summer business started with the recruitment of someone who we had been seen in the crowd on the big Wembley screens on that glorious day.  Sat next to Matt le Tissier in the crowd was one Adam Lallana and a few days later it turned out that not only was he there to support the boys and catch up with old friends, but he was there as a guest of the club because he was about to sign for us. At 36 years old, his best days are undoubtedly behind him but it’s an experienced head in a dressing room that is going to need them in the coming season.  There is the elephant in the room however, which is the fact that he didn’t exactly leave in the best of circumstances back in 2014. In 2014 he was in the England squad as Southampton captain and was out in Brazil in Roy Hodgson’s absolute clusterfuck World Cup campaign which saw us be the first team eliminated.   Roy had said he wanted no players conducting transfer business in Brazil but there was Adam, managing to get pictured signing a Liverpool shirt whilst still a Saints player and saying that he hoped he would be signing for them.  Not good PR that.

Lallana the Last Time He Played 90 Minutes

Upon his return, it appeared that he threw his toys out and refused to train before signing for the Scousers and being seen off with a two-line entry on the official Saints website.  If Twitter had been a big thing back then it would have had #FuckOff, #GoodRiddance and #Judas all over it. He tried to calm it all down by taking out a full-page advert in The Echo which just made him look #ThickAsMince.  The question for Saints fans is “how long do you want to hold a grudge for?“.  Speaking as someone who can hold a grudge with the best of them, even I can’t be arsed to get to ten years.  The bottom line is we’ve given a player a one-year deal and he is going to try to have a positive input, so I have no problem with him being here. He’s not going to be a 90-minute player because he never was, even when he was in his early 20s but we’re going to need everybody - fans and players pulling in the same direction so I see no point in being angry about him being here.  Other options are available of course.

Next up was the official unveiling of Taylor Harwood-Bellis as a Saints player once July 1st ticked around. This was of course revealed in the aftermath of the playoff final, as if we needed any more good news that day, and here he is, England’s future centre half and probable Southampton captain if we can hang onto him for long enough… and that will be the issue if he continues to develop as he should.

THB - About to Embark on the Mother of all Benders

Another playoff hero was Alex McCarthy who managed to earn himself another two-year contract with his very solid performances in the run in to promotion.  A prime example of how things can change very quickly in football and as things stand, he’ll be a first choice Premier League goalkeeper again in August unless we bring in someone else.

Russell Martin signed a new contract as well which was an unexpected bit of good news.  It was a surprise to me as I assume that his initial contract included a promotion bonus and a higher level of pay if wen went up.  What it does do however is say that Sport Republic trust him and want to back him and to me, it says that they are going to keep their nerve even if we do have a wobbly patch, which is undoubtedly going to happen.

More Free Taylor, Rather than Free Tella

The problem position of left back was then addressed with Charlie Taylor arriving from Burnley on a free transfer. Having spent seven years out of the last eight in the Premier League, he’s a player that certainly has the correct level of experience.  It’s not a signing to set the pulse racing but it is solid as we absolutely know that he can do it at this level and again brings Premier League experience that we don’t have much of. I would imagine, all things being equal, that he will be the starting left back or left wing back, with Ryan Manning as his back up.

Next up was Ronnie Edwards, a promising young centre half signed from Peterborough. He has been in the England Under-21 squad with THB and Saints have been interested in him for about two years but finally got the deal done for about £3 million quid which is almost a no-lose gamble.   Fans of other clubs are certainly seeing this as a good deal and an impressive piece of transfer business.  Time will tell of course.  I would anticipate Ronnie being a back up to start with, but he will certainly get minutes as the season goes on.  He has played at Championship level before but this is obviously going to be a massive step up for him.

Future's Bright

And here’s another centre back with Nathan Wood joining from Swansea.  Apparently, we offered £7 million this time last year, but Swansea didn’t want to do business with us after the Russell Martin compensations dick waving contest, that their board was involved in with ours.  So anyway, fast forward a year and we sign him for £3 million.  Maybe they think they’ll win the £2 million they are suing Russell for and maybe they think that £3 million plus £2 million equals £7 million.  They certainly taught us a lesson there.  Anyway, as with Ronnie Edwards – time will tell and like with Ronnie, I can see a back-up role at the start of the season.

It has been widely accepted that Kyle Walker-Peters is going to leave this summer as he enters the last year of his contract. A couple of clubs have been repeatedly linked with making a bid for him, namely West Ham and Spurs. As I write, nothing has happened but the have proactively moved in the transfer market to mitigate the risk of him going with the arrival of Yukinari Sugawara, a Japanese international right back who was plying his trade in the Eredivisie with AZ Alkmaar.  We’ve had some hits and misses out of the Dutch league in the past with Dusan Tadic and Graziano Pellè being in the hits column and Steve DeRidder being in the other. Sugawara’s stats in the Dutch league point towards an attacking right back who is going to be far more suited to playing as a wingback than a conventional right back in a four. Whilst it probably points towards us playing three at the back more often than not this season, it is also good to have a player in place before it became a mad panic and we ended up paying over the odds because teams knew we were desperate.  Yuki’s first interview revealed a charming, respectful, humble and funny individual who will become a massive fans favourite if he plays as well as he talks.

No Caption Necessary - This Just Made Me Smile

Remember me talking about West Ham just now?  Well, the media was full of talk of swap-deals with Flynn Downes and KWP, with a bit of Danny Ings thrown in.  We all know that swap deals are not a thing any more and  just a couple of days on from Russell Martin saying that he would cry himself to sleep if we didn’t sign Flynn Downes, we went out and gave Russell a good nights sleep by signing the aforementioned Flynn Downes from West Ham. With news having broken of us having agreed a fee of £18 million. I assumed that this was all going to go through in good time, so it was still a surprise to see him come running out down the catwalk a day later, at the 2024/25 Puma kit launch at St Mary’s. This one signing above all others, gives me a great sense of relief because we were basically a mid table Championship side whenever Downes didn’t play last season, so it would’ve left a massive expensive hole to fill if we didn’t sign him.  From Flynn‘s point of view, he was weighing up leaving the club he supports and being a bit-part player against being the first name of the team sheet at a Premier League club where he is absolutely loved by everyone connected with the club from manager to supporters.  Also, the signing means that we've signed the West Ham player and we still have KWP, with West Ham now rumoured to want Aaron Wan-Bissaka instead. 

Relief. Everywhere.

Outgoings are also going to play a major part in the summer rebuild and we had quite a few from the relegation season that were never going to play a part in the squad this time around and that needed to be addressed.  The first out was Romain Perraud, moving to Betis in Spain, which is a move that is testament to having a good agent.  He didn’t set the world alight in France last year so I did expect us to have a bit of a problem in moving him on but job done.  Romain just never fitted the system with Russell Martin so this was complete inevitable. He was always a player who tried his best in the relegation season, despite being inexplicably left out quite a few times.  I have a feeling that in ten years’ time, people will see a picture of him in a Saints shirt and struggle to remember who he was.

Perraud was one of the ‘loaned out’ army of players who either didn’t want to play in the Championship, or who Russell Martin thought weren’t good enough – which brings to Lyanco.  The chest-thumping nutjob with passion for days and his own emoji (which was dodgy when used in the wrong context) is off to Atletico Mineiro in his native Brazil.  He had the odd decent moment in a Saints shirt, in amongst a fair few liability moments, and his antics probably bought him more slack than they should have in the relegation season, given the amount of half-arsed shite that went on around him.  He seemed to genuinely care and you can’t help but want him to do well. Duje Caleta-Car moved on to Lyon and in contrast, no one really gives a shit.

I Still Think Duje Should Have Just Lamped The Twat

Another of the loaned out was Mateuz Lis, the goalkeeper who we signed purely to loan out it seems.  Having spent last season starring for Goztepe, he’s now back and training with the first team. Does he have a future here?  I doubt it but it would certainly be a turn up.

There is unquestionably still a lot to do.  For example, Wee Man is still a Newcastle player.  Che Adams has left the club officially and is currently unemployed, same as he was whilst doing shuttle runs up front for Scotland in the Euros.  The futures of Charly Alcaraz and Armel Bella-Kotchap are still unresolved, with various rumours of varying likelihood being punted about on the bag of shit that is the internet during the transfer window.  Alcaraz to Spurs and Newcastle, ABK to anywhere but Southampton.  What’s happening with Sulemana?  What’s happening with Mara?

Finally, we have the enigma that is Tall Paul.  A roaring success at Trabzonspor but they don't want to pay any money for him.  The usual shithousing tactics are coming out - their board 'demanding' we accept their piss-take offer, stuff in the media that Paul will only accept Trabzonspor.  Fucking do one you clowns.  He's worth £10 million of anyone's money and to be honest, I'd rather keep him or sell to almost anyone else.

Roy Weighs In on the Tall Paul Saga

For me, with five defenders being signed already, it’s the expensive end of the pitch that needs the work now.  A striker to replace Adams, preferably a physical one and then the midfield.  Even having signed Downes, we probably need one more in midfield as well with both Stuart Armstrong and Joe Rothwell departing from last seasons squad and only Lallana arriving so far. I like the sound of Matt O’Riley from Celtic but the buzz around that one seems to have calmed down and he’s being linked with everyone. Then of course, there is the keeper situation – yes, Macca is here for a year but you assume we’d need one more.  Where does Mateuz Lis fit in and why do these Aaron Ramsdale on loan rumours not disappear.  As it stands, KWP and Jan Bednarek are still here – but be be prepared to be reading that they have agreed contracts with lots of clubs without a fee being agreed with Saints yet.  Love the click-bait.

Overall I think we’ve made a solid start to the summer.  Not a lot of money has been spent in bringing in the likes of Lallana, Edwards, Wood, Taylor and Sugawara to compliment the relatively big money buys of THB and Downes.  Also, all of this business has been done before the first friendly.  There is more money needing to be spent at the top end however as anyone can see.  Currently, we have just two senior strikers – Adam Armstrong who failed to fire in two seasons of Premier League football and Ross Stewart who has failed to stand up for nearly two seasons.  Hopefully they both prove that they can hack it this season but either way, you can’t go into a season with just two strikers.  I am sure that it is going to take time.

Just under a month until the trip to St James’ Park.  That will fly by.

EFL Championship Match 28 - Swansea 1 Southampton 3

Wee Man Looks for That Ball He Belted into Row Z

Boxing Day really wasn’t that long ago was it?  Back in the day, the fixture computer used to have two teams play the reverse fixture against each other the following week and part of the problem with that was there everyone remembered who kicked them the previous week, so the second match invariably ended up with all sorts of vendettas being settled.  No such excuses these days but then fixture computer does this. It’s not just us of course because everybody is playing their Boxing Day opponent.

Swansea have more reason the most for not wanting to play their Boxing Day opponent because they got beat 5-0 at St Mary’s.  A lot of water has gone under the bridge since then down in Abertawe, with PE Teacher Michael Duff finally being permanently replaced by Luke Williams. Williams, a former assistant of Russell Martin, is the latest manager tasked with trying to get a result against Russell Martin, who is of course returning to his former club in what’s sure to be an emotional day for him, such is the affection with which he obviously holds his time with the Swans.

In Swansea’s favour of this time is that Saints are entirely different proposition at home than they are away.  Away from home, we of course struggle to kill teams off and I’m sure that we would’ve been working on that this week. This would of course be the ideal time to start with a run of away games coming up now.  Even if we do better than we have in our recent away games, it’s unlikely to be a runaway win like it was at St Mary’s. Whenever you play any team with a bit of new manager bounce, then you really have to score the first goal because the work ethic in these teams is usually pretty strong and giving them a goal start of course will give them something to hang onto. Put it this way, the game will be made a lot easier if we score first.

Saints made a first signing of the transfer window with the arrival of Joe Rothwell on loan from Bournemouth.  I’m not going to lie, part of me is a little bit embarrassed that we are taking players on-loan from fucking Bournemouth, a club which is an embarrassment to the Premier League given but they’ve had all that money through all the seasons in the Premier League and are still playing in a shed.  Regardless of all that, Joe Rothwell is here and adds to the squad in the number eight position primarily.  It’s a little bit strange on the face a bit because it’s not a position that we were obviously weak in, even with Joe Aribo away and doing his thing for Nigeria in the African Nations Cup. Rothwell is our fifth loan signing of the season which leaves us with a bit of a problem if we want to bring in another player because one of the loan signings, assuming any new signing is a loan, won’t be able to sit on the bench on a match day. So bye-bye Mason Holgate.

The mighty Aribo hasn’t seen much action in the Afcon as yet, making a twenty minute substitute appearance in the first game and being an unused sub in the second. Nigeria have four points from two games so far so they are certain of getting through the group so both Joe and for that matter, Tall Paul will be with Nigeria for a while yet.  Nathan Tella is free to play for Leverkusen however.

Team news and no real news as we’re unchanged.  Rothwell is on the bench in place of Meghoma and that’s it.  Russell Martin manages to sit in the correct dugout and here we go. There’s been a lot of talk about which of the two teams was going to dominate possession and it became apparent very, very quickly that it was going to be us.  Down the left with Manning and a lovely floated cross over the back of the defence to Adams who slashes at the volley and it skews of his foot and goes well wide. Yes, it would’ve been goal of the season if he had connected properly but he really should’ve got a bit closer than that.

Down the left again through Manning and a ball into Adams, who flicks it round the corner to Stuart Armstrong.  Stu cuts back past a defender and smashes it goalwards, parried out by Rushworth and Adams has an open goal at the back post.  He’s missed from closer before but not this time. Brilliant goal and a deserved 1-0 lead after six minutes.

The Big Dog Gives It Some

Saints are certainly looking to kill this game off early and Swansea try to play out and we win it back on half-way and Adams once again plays a lovely reserve pass to put Fraser through on the left and his effort is saved by Rushworth, spilled out as far as Adam Armstrong who can only hit the goalkeeper with his follow-up effort.

The next 10 minutes so just a procession with Saints holding onto the ball and looking for openings.  THB gets his head up and chips it over the left of the Swansea defence to Stuart Armstrong, who exchanges passes with Fraser before rolling the ball across about 4 yards out and there is the very distinctive Will Smallbone ghosting into the box to knock it into the net. I mean Stuart Armstrong is fucking miles offside when it takes the pass back from Fraser but the flag stayed down and that’s the beauty of the Championship and everyone can go mental.  Just twenty minutes and we’ve managed to score the mythical second away goal.

We are still not taking the foot off the gas at all and Adam Armstrong manages to almost ball juggle his way through and brings another save out of Rushworth who is then unceremoniously dumped on his ass by Che Adams, playing and acting like the Big Dog again.

Out of literally nowhere, Swansea that attack with Wood playing a decent ball to Ashby who has made his way over to the Manning Chasm.  Fuck knows where Manning is but Bednarek’s over there covering, but Ashby skins him and chucks a ball into the box and an offside looking Jamal Lowe and Baz collide, amidst us shouting for handball and it’s knocked back into the mixer by Cullen and Paterson has a free header from 6 yards.  Bollocks, that is virtually the first time they’ve got into our half.  A quick glance at a replay proves that Lowe is offside and he’s used his arm inadvertently to flick it on, mainly because he completely shat himself when Bazunu came out.   We can’t be happy about us getting away with one of the other end and get pissy about this one however.  With a shrug instead of a long drawn out load of bollocks at Stockley Park, 2-1.

Swansea might of known at this point that they had poked the bear and the bear was not gonna be very happy with Stuart Armstrong taking a pass from Fraser before knocking it back to Flynn Downes who took aim from the edge of the box and pings it into the far corner of the net via a slight deflection off of ex-Skate Jamal Lowe.  Flynn Downes doesn’t celebrate out of respect for Swansea but I forgive him that because it’s a brilliant goal and now we have the two-goal lead that we deserve, again.  Half time.

Celebrate, You Fucker!

The second half starts and it’s almost like Saints are trying to manage the game because we seem content to keep possession and we are not particularly stretching the opposition. Swansea to be fair, are pushed higher at the pitch now.   We never look as good when we go passive.  On the hour mark, Russell Martin somewhat inexplicably decides to take off THB and replace him with Captain Jack, which left the departing player looking somewhat bemused. Yes he had picked up a yellow card earlier in the game taking one for the team but the chances of him getting a second yellow were nearly zero, bearing in mind he was just cruising through this game.

It looks like it’s going to be 4-1 as Adam Armstrong gets put through by Adams and goes round the keeper like prime Brazilian Ronaldo… but this time the flag does go up.  Armstrong then showed his new Pirlo-esque creativity, clipping a lovely ball over everybody to Ryan Fraser coming in from the left but the Wee Man gets it all wrong and half-volley’s it miles over, as if he was wearing those wellies that got put on his car roof last week.

More substitutions with Adams and Stuart Armstrong being replaced with Mara and Rothwell.  It was at this moment that it all went to shit with Saints playing the ball around the defence and Baz knocking it to Captain Jack, who tried to find Bednarek and instead of that passed it into open grass in the middle of a penalty area and Paterson picked it up and drilled it across from a narrow angle and somehow, Swansea sub Yates managed to hit the post from about an inch out. Well played Jack for fucks sake.

Captain Jack then compounds this by playing an absolute shit, waist-high ball into Smallbone in midfield and once again we lose it to Patino who gets tackled in the penalty area and Paterson again, hammers in a shot and Bazunu reacts superbly to tip it onto the post.  Well played Jack for fucks sake.

Yanick Bolasie has come on and despite being 34 now, he still has some tricks up his sleeve and a cross from our left causes absolute havoc and sees Joe Allen’s shot blocked by Bednarek. How the fuck has it come to this?  In comes a cross from our right and Stephens is doing a Harry Maguire and is marking the guy Bednarek is marking, completely leaving Manning with two and Bolasie gets up and Bazunu again does brilliantly to block again.

In keeping with us being shambolic, the referee is completely losing the plot now. Jay Fulton obviously fancies himself as a little bit of an enforcer in the Swansea midfield, a bit like Roy Keane but with no ability, blatantly trips Adams in the penalty area which should give us a spot kick but the ref does nothing despite looking straight at it.  He’s also quite happy in allowing Harry Darling and Joe Allen to trash through Ryan Fraser in separate incidents. As injury time ticks down Swansea have one more attack with Bolasie blazing high, wide and handsome and that’s your lot.

Sometimes it’s really hard not to have a memory like a goldfish and literally only remember the last twenty minutes of football that you’ve watched or whatever, and forget everything that’s gone before it.  The goldfish memory will only remember Southampton being fucking dreadful, basically inviting a very limited opposition to score by basically, giving the ball away every opportunity and playing like eleven strangers.  Luckily for the non-goldfish, we had the first hour of the game where we were quite simply brilliant and having said at the start that it wouldn’t be a repeat of the 5-0 scoreline at St Mary‘s, no one could ‘ve really said it was unjustified if we were 5-0 up at half-time.

Make no mistake, for the first half of this game we absolutely murdered Swansea and the ridiculousness of it was that after 40 minutes, the score was 2-1. Che Adams should’ve scored after about four minutes with a volley that he had a lot of time to set himself up for that he slashed wide but once he tapped in the first, we completely dominated but only had Smallbone’s 20th minute tap-in to show for it.  Our offside goal was cancelled out by Swansea’s offside and handball goal and ridiculously, the scoring was completed just before half-time with Flynn Downes effort.

Captain Jack is Confused as To Why He Passed it There

I don’t think Russell Martin covered himself in glory with the substitutions. Bringing on Jack Stephens in the hour mark was the catalyst for everything to go to shit with THB having been immaculate as usual, aside from the yellow card he picked up. Stephens passing was erratic and his marking was of the ball watching variety which invited Swansea onto us and the raggedness that he brought onto the pitch, permeated through the rest of the team.   Why did Bednarek move from left centre-back to the right when Stephens naturally plays that side?   Though Russell Martin appears to have a bit of a blindspot regarding the man he made club captain, the evidence presented today leaves no doubt that he is a significant downgrade on Bednarek and THB, who are Premier League level centre backs.  We are where we are in the league because we got the defence sorted out when the THB and Bednarek partnership came together consistently, so not fucking with it would be my advice.

Joe Rothwell came on for his debut and gave the ball away a few times and didn’t really look like he knew where he was supposed to be playing in the system and that didn’t help either. Sekou Mara came on for Che Adams and it’s difficult for a striker when the team is already playing badly and you’re not the sort to make something happen on your own by being strong and getting us up the park.  Mara has been ok recently when the team has been on top but if we're not on top, he isn't the sort to help turn things around.

The bottom line is that we won the game, we scored three goals away from home the first time this season and we have gone second in the league. There is also a small fact that everyone keeps going on about that we are now 21 games unbeaten in all competitions and 20 in the league which is a club record for the professional era. The only club record that remains now it’s 24 games unbeaten from the Invincibles of 1897. Rumour has it that the 1897 team will be doing a lap of honour around St Mary‘s if we break that record.

Will Ghosts In

There were some brilliant performances out there in the first half today.  KWP, THB, Downes, Fraser, Adam Armstrong to name but a few but the pick of the bunch for me was Will Smallbone, who had what was probably his best game in the Saints shirt. Having lost his place to Joe Aribo recently and reclaimed it because of the AFCON, it must’ve been slightly galling for him to see Joe Rothwell come in to add more competition to that area of the pitch but though Rothwell didn’t pull up any trees on his debut, his arrival may well have had something to do with Smallbone putting in that performance today. Sky Sports for once got it right and named him man of the match.

We also have to mention Gavin Bazunu who though probably could’ve done better with the Swansea goal by mullering the Skate Bastard, pulled off two outstanding saves in the second half to preserve the win and everyone’s sanity because if we dropped any points today having been that dominant in the first half, I think several people including myself would’ve been having all sorts of anger management issues after the game.

Next up is the FA Cup 4^th Round uninspiring trip to Watford where I expect a few players will be rested but with the confidence we are showing at the moment, we should have enough to get ourselves into the hat for Round of 16, as thankfully no one calls it.  This team will not want to be beaten in the FA Cup and with no midweek games before or after the Watford game, there’s no real reason to take it easy. Bring it on.

Up the fucking 21 games unbeaten Saints.

EFL Championship Match 24 - Southampton 5 Swansea 0

Sam Doesn't Even Need to Look the Right Way

At the tail end of last season, when our relegation from the Premier League had been confirmed, we announced that the perpetually fucking useless Ruben Selles was not going to be our manager and the name in the frame was Russell Martin, the manager of Swansea. The Championship season had of course had already finished and Martin was in dispute with Swansea and quite clearly wanted to leave. Saints approached and it became apparent that Martin wanted to join and then it all kicked off over the compensation. Saints wanted to pay a certain compensation figure, based on the fact that we were in the Championship next year and Swansea wanted us to pay a higher figure because we were still technically a Premier League club even though we were mathematically already down and that Russell Martin’s first game in charge was going to be in the Championship. This dragged on and two boards of grown men and women were unable to act as adults and come to an agreement.

We moved on and so did Swansea, appointing Michael Duff and the fortunes of the two clubs have diverged somewhat with Saints fifteen games unbeaten and Michael Duff being sacked a few weeks ago after generally being derided as a PE Teacher - all of which tells you that Swansea have not been doing particularly well. So now we have it, The Great Compensation Derby.

Russell Martin will have a bit of a strange day today as he still clearly has a lot of affection for Swansea and the supporters there, as illustrated by his ‘Swim away’ goading of Cardiff fans a few weeks back. From a football point of view this will be an interesting one because the number of the Swansea players will know Martin’s way of playing and will know how Saints are going to go about things. They are managerless at the moment with Alan Sheehan taking caretaker charge of today’s game.

I’m a little bit concerned about today because there is no way this should be anything other than a comfortable home win but Sods Law and the Martin connection tells me that it might be otherwise. I’m a bit worried that today might be a day that we cough up a shit goal though losing the ball near our own penalty area as the Swans players will know all the passing moves etc.

The starting XI comes out and Jack Stephens is in it so naturally, the thought process is that we are going to 3 at the back, which seems completely mental as we are on a fifteen game unbeaten run with playing a back four. Basically, Stephens is coming to the side in place of Smallbone, with Manning replacing the injured Bree. Maybe it’s a desire to do something that Swansea won’t be expecting, given the links between the two clubs.  Once in the ground watching the warm-up, it is always worth waiting to see the back line practising their passes and how they line up. From that it looks like Jack is playing right back in a back four because KWP is nowhere to be seen in that particular drill.

Away we go with both teams looking to play, which is good news and it does very much look like the Russell Martin Derby with both teams trying to keep the ball.  Flynn Downes gives away a free kick 40 yards out and in it comes into a good area and Cabango knocks it across and Yates on the stretch smashes it miles over the bar. There was a distinct lack of urgency and movement in the Saints defence but the flag belatedly went up for offside which maybe explains it.

However, offside isn’t saving us from the next chance as Swansea build up down our right and then a big switch out to Humphreys at right back and his cross is met by the completely unmarked ex-Skate Jamal Lowe who absolutely shites it miles over the bar like the irrelevant Skate that he is.

Joe Acknowledges the St Mary's DJ

Saints now start playing, with Edozie getting his first run at his full-back and he completely pisses past him, cuts it back to the edge of the box, Stuart Armstrong’s shot hits Adam Armstrong on the arse and bounces out to Joe Aribo and with a swing of his mighty left peg, it’s on target and then defelcted past the keeper and right into the corner of the net for 1-0.  Fuck me, I thought I’d never see the day and then it all gets very tinpot with the goal music and not only is it not the normal goal music, it’s the music behind the Joe Aribo chant which is of course Spandau Ballet’s Gold.  I think it’s a massive cringe but I have been very outvoted by the crowd around me.

The Cornish Cafu at right back manages to look dangerous and somewhat awkward at the same time as he burst forward and feeds into Adam Armstrong in the ‘D’ and it’s a good turn and shot which is pushed away by Rushworth.  Back come Saints and Edozie absolutely pisses past Humphreys again and flashes a ball across face of goal with no one running in to make any contact. 

Cullen who has already been booked then crudely crashes into Manning as he tries to burst forward.  In the old days, that’s a talking to and ‘one more and you’re off’ but now that has to be a second yellow but no.

Half-time and in truth, Swansea have been one of the better teams we played at home this season so far, at least having the nerve to try and keep the ball and not just let us have it and set everyone behind it. It’ll be interesting to see how they deal with being behind in the second half.  Saints have been ok – Edozie being the brightest spark and I’m not sure this KWP on the wing with the Cornish Cafu at right back is working particularly well.  Also, Adam Armstrong has been way off so far but he’ll probably get an assist for that Stuey shot hitting his arse and bouncing out to Aribo, always believe in your soul etc.

No changes for Saints at half-time and from their own throw, Swansea try to knock it back to the left sided central defender, Nathan Wood, who was linked with Saints in the summer, and under pressure from Arma, he bobbles a horrible pass across to Rushworth who plays a massive fucking airshot and Edozie gets to the ball beyond the back post and backheels it and there’s a big bundle as the defender tries to clear it but that’s clearly over the line and the referees watch confirms it. 2-0.  The keeper has his head in his hands – what a twat.  I could feel sorry for him but it’s hilarious when it’s not your keeper.

But maybe it’s not quite done yet… Alcaraz and Smallbone are on for Downes and Stuart Armstrong, leaving us with the midfield three of the two newly inserted subs and Joe Aribo, which is quite horribly lacking in defensive nous and running but I guess Russell obviously thinks that the game is done and we have to trust him in this regard.  Swansea have a bit of the ball for ten minutes whilst we adjust to the changes and there’s more changes as Wee Man Fraser and Adams come on for the superb Edozie and Jack Stephens.

Wee Man Is Becoming Very Popular

Swansea give the ball away again on the right and Adam Armstrong picks it up and runs and picks out Fraser on the edge of the box and he emphatically strokes it into the top corner of the net to give goalkeeper absolutely no chance. 3-0.  The word you are looking for is ‘clinical’.

Arma goes off to be replaced by Sekou Mara and KWP has reverted to right back with Stephens going off and attack wise, he proves that he is more effective from there straight away, bursting into the box, playing a 1-2 and then from a narrow angle, drilling it straight at the goalkeeper who manages to not make an arse of himself and blocks well.  We don’t have long to wait for number four though as Aribo gets away from his marker on the right and finds Mara and his pull back along the six-yard line is despatched by Ryan Fraser again, first time into the top corner. 4-0.

Swansea bring on a couple of has-beens in Yanick Bolasie and Joe Allen but all Bolasie can do is inspire the Swansea fans to chant his name and all Allen and can do is crash through Charly Alcaraz twice and pick up a deserved booking.

Swansea give the ball away again and Fraser again does that thing where he makes the slightest space and then stands up a superb cross, the goalie has a fucking mare being too close to the near post and Che Adams brings it down on his chest and miraculously, fires it into the roof of the net instead of smashing it straight at the keeper. Five.

We want six… damn, full time.

When we scored four against Blackburn in the last home game, the reason why it happened could be strongly linked to the fact that they only had ten men and just wanted to get out there. Today, Swansea didn’t have that excuse but they reacted very badly to the adversity of the shit second goal that they let in with the keeper playing an air shot. Once again though, we took advantage of the situation and absolutely buried them with three goals as the game wound down.  In the first half, I found myself thinking that Swansea one of the better sides that we have played at home this season as they were decent on the ball and given a better finish by Lowe, would’ve been 1-0 up. You can’t just give up when something goes against you though and if you do that, you deserve to get absolutely stuffed.

Swansea right back Humphreys had an absolute beast of a game. Firstly, Sam Edozie went past him at will whilst he was on the pitch.  Then Humphreys must have been delighted when Edozie went off and then he then watched on as his replacement Ryan Fraser score two goals in five minutes.  Swansea were trying to play a style of football that they were not good enough to do. Matt Grimes kept picking up the ball in midfield and knocking it around thinking the defenders were all as good on the ball as he is and the likes of Nathan Wood just can’t pass the ball around under pressure as demonstrated by the second goal. A shit bobbly 5-yard pass to the goalkeeper is always going to end in disaster.  That was a great piece of invention from Edozie to get that ball goalwards.  Most of our other players would have turned on that and tried to beat a player again.

There were two great finishes by the Wee Man, who is now becoming a bit of a Cult Hero with the St Mary’s faithful. Taking the passes from Adam Armstrong and Sekou Mara to give the keeper absolutely no chance.  Then the Wee Man dug out a superb cross for the fifth goal when, after another shocking bit or Rushworth goalkeeping, Che Adams managed to kick a football in the right direction.

I hope to hear the Aribo goal music another ten times before the end of the season….for fuck‘s sake!

Yep, They Looked Shit As Well

Jack Stephens had a half decent game at right-back but he’s not suited to playing that position really and it’s never a long term solution.  Not least because playing KWP on the wing certainly doesn’t get the best out of him. Ryan Manning had a good game against his former club apart from one defensive shambles when he was far too far in field opening up the Manning Chasm for the cross that ultimately should’ve put us 1-0 down but for the ex-skate not getting his feet in the right place.

So, I thought that today could be a banana skin because of Sods Law and the fact we were playing Russell Martin’s old team. I guess I was wrong. These are the great days people - and it won’t always be like this. We will lose games between now and the end of the season but for the moment anyway, the team looks pretty relentless, the ability to change the game off the bench is there for all to see and we have scored ten goals scored and conceded none in the last three games, which have all been well won.

Sixteen games unbeaten now and with Leeds defeat today, we have finally moved up a place and are now third, just five points behind Ipswich. It’s been a good day for us today with all three of our main rivals dropping points but as you know, in three days time, we go again and we can’t afford any fuck ups against Plymouth. On, on and up the fucking Saints.

FA Cup 3rd Round - Swansea 2 Southampton 3 (aet)

Shane isn't Offside...This is Not a Drill

FA Cup third round day and we are off to Wales to play Swansea at what used to be known as the Liberty stadium and is now known as the Swansea.com Stadium, which sounds really shit. Also shit, due to the Mark Drakeford wanting to be different to England, there will be no fans in the ground, an unwelcome throwback to last season, when football was shit.

Swansea are in what can be termed a transitional season, having lost their manager five minutes before the season started and appointing a virtual rookie in Russell Martin, who has been fairly impressive so far. They are kind of loitering in lower mid-table but with the Championship being the beast it is, a decent run of wins can catapult you into the play-off places and that will be their aim for the season. They shouldn’t have too many surprises for us because Martin tries to get them playing in a decent way, playing out from the back and being comfortable in possession.  It will be interesting to see what Swansea‘s attitude is towards the game. I imagine that Russell Martin will put our mix-and-match side, not least because they haven’t played for about three weeks because of Covid cancellations.

Today has been jokingly labelled the Michael Obafemi Derby, so I’m going to talk about him.  The striker broke into the Saints team at 18, scored a goal straight away and showed some ability.  Over the next three years he showed a complete inability to keep himself fit or be professional (Ralph Hasenhuttl’s words, not mine) and eventually we couldn’t wait to get rid of him, being happy with the £1.5 million we got from Swansea.   He should have been the ready-made academy replacement for Danny Ings and saved us £15 million but in the end, he wasn’t even seen as the replacement for Shane Long.  Since he has been at Swansea, surprise surprise, injured again, being unprofessional again (Russell Martin’s words, not mine) and I’m sure they would want to get rid of him as soon as they can. You wonder where he is going to end up next if he doesn’t sort himself out.  If he fails at Championship level then in these days of belt tightening, especially lower down the leagues, it’s unlikely he’s going to get anything higher than League 1. When he was at St Mary‘s, Michael was built like a middleweight boxer with his top half looking considerably bigger than his bottom half and one theory was that he used so much energy powering all his muscles, he could never recover properly after games. Whether that’s true or not, it’s a plausible explanation for why he could never produce two decent appearances in a row. If he played well one game, then he ended up getting substituted in the second game at half-time because he was blowing out his arse after 20 minutes. If you can’t play consecutive games, then you are never going to become a first team regular, are you?

The kid is clearly an arsehole of the worst kind, mainly because he has the ability to be a half decent player. He is an insult to everyone who wanted to be a professional footballer but didn’t have the natural ability. He’s certainly got a goal in him though so it wouldn’t surprise me at all if he scored today.

After the Newcastle postponement shambles, Saints will be looking ahead so I imagine we will be mix-and-match as well, as after this game we have Brentford on Tuesday followed by another game on the Saturday.  After the takeover there was more good news with Nathan Tella signing a new deal taking him up to the end of the 2024/25 season. It’s up to him now to kick on and build it on his undoubted promise, in the exact way that Michael Obafemi was never going to do.

Yan Valery at right back is the only real headline in a strong looking Saints side. The centre backs are the slow combination of Stephens and Bednarek, last seen being dreadful at Arsenal.  Hopefully, Swansea won’t be as good as Arsenal…. And Obafemi starts, as does Joel Piroe, their main goalscorer which tells you that Martin is not really prioritising upcoming league games at the expense of the FA Cup.

Away we go with Swansea passing a ball around nicely from the kick-off but it always looks kind of clunky when you see Championship players trying to zip the ball about. The first incident is a booking for Yan Valery after about three minutes as he launches into a tackle on the right-hand side and arrives about 10 minutes after the ball has gone. The referee, the normally pretty good Simon Hooper, has no choice but to book him.

With our first real chance, we take the lead on eight minutes as Swansea’s passing from deep takes a dump as someone plays a horrendous pass across the midfield, straight to Nathan Tella and he slides it through for Nathan Redmond to pass into the corner of the net from the edge of the box. Very efficient and 1-0 up.

For the next 20 minutes it all looks very easy and a matter of how many goals we will win by. Swansea are struggling as soon as they turn over possession and it looks like it’s going to be a comfortable afternoons work but then of course, it never is and it all goes to shit. One long ball pinged over our defence finds Obafemi on the left wing and though his first touch is shit, Yan Valery feels the need to put his hand over his shoulder. Party Boy throws himself to the ground and though it’s soft and though he’s thrown himself, that is always going to be a second booking and off he goes. Balls.

We re-shuffle with JWP going to right back, Stuart Armstrong to the centre of midfield, and Nathan Redmond to right wing leaving Armando Broja upfront on his own and we get to half-time comfortably enough with no real alarms but suddenly the game has got a lot more difficult.

No changes at half time and there really isn’t much to say for the next half an hour as Swansea pass the ball around in front of us and create no chances at all.  There’s an incident involving Ryan Bennett when he pulls back Tella.  Having already been booked it really looked like it should have been 10v10 but nothing doing. A couple of times on the break we should do a lot better.  A heavy touch by Broja means that what should have been a chance either for himself or for Nathan Tella is butchered and then JWP puts in a free-kick from the right hand side which finds Jack Stephens at the back post with a free header at an open goal but he picked out the wrong side of the post in truly dreadful fashion.  In the 65^th Ralph brings on Adam Armstrong and Diallo for Stuart Armstrong and Redmond.

On 77 minutes, as they were always going to, Swansea create an opportunity with a nice ball in between the lines by Grimes, a cross ball which skims off of Stephens and breaks nicely for Piroe to smash it high into the net. Fuck.

With Elyounoussi and Long on for Broja and Tella, we have a proper go at losing it in the 90th minute as Elyounoussi loses the ball and Swansea break on us and suddenly Piroe is clean through in the right-hand channel but he shits himself as Fraser Forster comes out and smashes his shot too close to him and it hits one of  Fraser’s size 15s and bounces away.

In a surprise development, for me anyway, there is extra time because for some reason, I thought all the games were straight to penalties. I bet Ralph is absolutely loving the fact that we’ve got a play and another half an hour with 10 men. Michael Obafemi has miraculously lasted 90 minutes of doing nothing much but that’s his lot. Don’t expect him to be able to play the next game Russell.

And then it happens on 94 minutes, Swansea get wide with a ball floated over to Ntcham on the right wing and his low fizzer across the box is turned into his own net by Bednarek who is doing some sort of shit dance trying to get his feet in the right position. Fucks sake.

This Is For You, BBC Wales

Straight from the kick-off, we knock it back to Jack Stephens he gets his head up and pings one over the top of Swansea left back Manning who is not concentrating and Shane Long takes what must be the best first touch of his career and bundles past him before sending the ball across and finding Elyounoussi at the back post and he takes a very good first touch before passing it into the net past Hamer who pulls a face at his defenders like a bulldog licking piss off a stinging nettle.

It’s the substitutes who are involved again as Elyounoussi picks up the ball on the left hand side and spreads out to the overlapping JWP on the right and he gets his head up and plays over a lovely low first time cross which picks out Shane and he doesn’t even have to take a touch, just sweep it into the net to make it 3-2. Get in. Shane Long has scored and he’s not offside. This is not a drill.

We’ve responded brilliantly to going behind and now it’s Swansea turns and what have they got? Nothing. The second half of extra time plays out in relative comfort. Job done.

Well, we got there. You have to remember that any cup game and in particular the FA Cup game it’s just about the result and the performance doesn’t really matter as long as you are in the hat for the next round. We overcame quite a lot of adversity today and there have been plenty of times over the last couple of years where this has not been the case.  For starters, we’ve played 90 minutes out of 120 with 10 men. With Valery being sent off, we had to take our best player out of central midfield and put him right back because our other to right backs who we could’ve put on were unavailable. Then, you add in the fact that we were away from home, plus we were 2-1 down in extra time having conceded a crappy own goal. To still come out on the right end of the result is what it’s all about.

Party Boy Chases His First Touch

Once Valery got booked in the first couple of minutes it was entirely predictable that he picked up a second yellow card. There are some players you can trust not to pick up a second yellow after picking up an early one (like Romeu) but like Salisu last week, Valery is not one of them. Like with the Salisu last week, we can’t really have any complaints from the point of view of the referee because Valery has put his hand on Obafemi’s shoulder and very similar to the Salisu on Son last week, it was completely unnecessary to make any sort of challenge because the first touch of the striker was running straight through to the goalkeeper. It’s disappointing that Obafemi saw fit to throw himself to the ground, rather than use the alleged pace he has but it's not surprising. That was his main contribution to the game when you look back on it, as he did absolutely fuck all with the ball at his feet in 60 minutes against 10 men.

It’s always nice when you have an unlikely hero to talk about. Shane Long isn’t going to have many more days in the sun and whatever you think of him as a player, you can’t be anything but pleased for the guy to bag the winning goal. For once he managed to stay onside and it was very obliging of Swansea to defend like we have done recently and all stand there ball-watching and not marking the man.

Like everybody else, I was watching the BBC Wales coverage which was as biased as it comes in an amusing way. I don’t know who the woman was who was adding insight during the game but she was actually very good with her comments until Swansea equalised to make it 1-1, when she made a very strange squealing giggling noise with the excitement of it all.  She also laughed at Bednarek over the own goal – can’t blame her for that as I was laughing as well, sort of.  As a commentary team they all seemed to lose sight of the fact that we were playing with 10 men which is why Swansea were having possession and were “the better side”.  Also, losing sight of the fact that if we had kept 11 on the pitch then they probably would’ve got battered about 5-0. For all Swansea’s possession, the bottom line is that we scored twice from them trying to play out from the back and giving the ball away.  The winning goal was hilarious in that regard – some really sharp passing to get to the half-way line and some commentary masturbation, we win it back, 4 passes, goal, see ya later.  We missed a few chances today to make it more comfortable, but the worst miss was the crowd.  It was a reminder of how shit football is with no fans in the stadium.

On Sunday a miracle happened – we got a home draw in the 4^th Round against Coventry City from the Championship.  It’s our first home draw since Lawrie McMenemy was the manager, nearly.

Next up we have Brentford on Tuesday in a game that has been rearranged because they had some players missing when it was originally supposed to be played. Ironically and predictably, it’s now us with players missing because as far as I can work out, we have one right back who is injured, one who has Covid and one who is suspended.  We will turn up though.  We will not pretend we have an epidemic and then declare that they were all False Positives after we’ve got what we wanted.