FA Cup 3rd Round - Southampton 4 Burnley 3

It's time for these Pictures Again.

I said that I wasn’t going to go to the FA Cup 3^rd Round match against Burnley but in the end I changed my mind at the last minute.  This was basically because I am back to work on Monday and so the grind begins again... why not search down the back of the sofa for twenty quid to watch the mighty SFC?  I have to admit that part of the attraction of this game was to be playing a proper football club with proper fans who aren’t a bunch of Premiership only plastic wankers.  The ‘only come for the Chelsea’ chants and the 70^th minute exodus of our own supporters on New Years Day had got to me a bit I have to admit.

Burnley ‘lost’ Moaning Eddie Howe last season and now have Sean Dyche in charge who has had them at the top of the Championship all season.  They are currently in 2^nd place behind ex-Saints manager Nigel Pearson’s Leicester but in front of ex-Saints manager and Ballbag stunt double, Honest ‘Arry Redknapp at QPR who wear blue and white hoops like a stereotypical thief.  Burnley have scored lots of goals this season, mainly through two Saints fans in Sam Vokes and Danny Ings.  For this reason alone we should hope they get promoted.  Other links between the clubs are of course J-Rod who we signed from them for £7m and Jack Cork who was on loan there once upon a time when Chelsea were trying to ruin him.  Also, Danny Fox played for them as well but we’re not sentimental enough to give him a game because of that.  We are taking the FA Cup seriously after all, aren’t we?

On the face of it we’ve named quite a strong team.  The centre back pairing is Maya and Big Jos and both Adam Lallana and ironically J-Rod are on the bench.  Sir Rickie is up front, ably supported by Gaston, JWP and Steve Davis.  The Pirate is nowhere to be seen because he got a 3 match ban for the fracas at Newcastle where it is alleged he kicked someone in the bollocks (rumour!). 

Our other news is of course Twattenburgate.  The club put in a complaint to the PGMOL (the faceless group who deal with everything about referees who are totally unaccountable) about the way the Twatt spoke to Adam Lallana in the wake of the non-penalty at the end of the Everton game.   Our complaint got thrown out and we were made to look as bad as West Brom did earlier in the season.  What we should have done is complained because he’s a shit referee who never gives us anything.  We have refused to accept the verdict that the Twatt did nothing wrong and have asked for him not to referee any of our games in the future until it’s sorted.  This I think was what we wanted all along.  In view of the Chelsea incident with Twattenburg last year, I expect this caused him a bit of discomfort and I hope it fucking did.  If he hadn’t have bottled giving a blatant penalty because he was on his best behaviour for Everton then none of this would have happened.

To today and in front of a half full SMS, Burnley have the first effort on goal as Arfield fires just over.  The next 20 minutes or so sees the game struggling to get going as there’s not much excitement and it all seems half paced.  Was this what the Championship was like or is this what you get with a half full stadium?  Burnley seemed to be giving us too much respect and we weren’t good enough to take advantage.  Gaston was trying hard to get involved but we were giving the ball away lots before we got up the pitch with Maya Yoshida being the main culprit but others such as Corky and Sir Rickie weren’t really at the races either.

Out of nothing really, Corky wins the ball and plays it into Steve Davis who puts just the correct amount of side on the ball to feed Clyne on the right hand side of the box.  His first touch made the ball sit up and his second touch smashed it into the net on the volley.  A goal from a very unexpected source and a run to the Northam End and a goal celebration dance routine which he obviously hasn’t practiced much.  There then followed 5 minutes of the crowd shouting ‘shooooot’ every time he got the ball which when you are running towards your own goal with a forward up your arse is not the best advice.

Then lightning struck for the second time but from a more expected source this time.  Gaston fed Steve Davis who teed up Sir Rickie who advanced a pace and then smashed it into the top corner as casually as you like from the best part of 25 yards.  I felt a bit sorry for the keeper there as he’d had no chance with either of those.  It should be 3-0 straight afterwards as Gaston’s ball puts Sir Rickie in on goal but he craps this one over the bar when it was a much easier chance than the last one.  To complete an eventful 10 minutes for the big man, he then has to go off as he’s injured his hip.  At 2-0 up against a Championship side, I expected Sam Gallagher to come on but it’s J-Rod of course as we’re playing his former club.  It seems an odd move as we have just two other senior forwards – one has just come off injured and one has just kicked someone in the bollocks and got banned.

We gift Burnley a chance to get a goal back before half time as JWP tries to bring down a ball on the edge of the box and clatters a forward in the process.  There is a time when you should just smash it up the pitch but we weren’t punished as Trippier hit one of the worst free-kicks I’ve ever seen and hit it at shin height into the wall.  Luke Shaw has our final effort of the half but he’s moving into Jack Cork never score territory now as his near post effort is tipped round the post by a keeper who must have been pleased to actually see one.  Half time and 2-0 and comfortable as you like.

The second half starts like it’s going to be a pretty tame affair but that all changes after five minutes as Ings finds space on the right and crosses for Vokes to get in and flick a free header into the net.  Game on I guess and the game is well and truly on in another five minutes as Big Jos allows a big punt forwards to bounce and once it has he has to turn and chase after Ings who has the run on him.  As Jos turns as quickly as an oil tanker in dry dock, there’s only one winner and Ings gets to the ball and cuts in.  It gets worse for us as Not-so-Superkelv gets a bout of Nearpostitis and dives towards the penalty spot, leaving Ings with the simple task of knocking it past him and in at the near post to make it 2-2.  Between Jos and Kelvin it was a totally horrific goal to concede.  Big Jos let it bounce and was level with the forward who is much quicker than him and then Kelvin made it easy for him.  I’d like to think that Dejan would have headed it and King Artur would have been throwing the big star jump as Ings got near and there would have been no gaps for him to aim at.

We’re all over the place now and Vokes very nearly puts Burnley in front but his half volley from about 15 yards is superbly saved one handed by Superkelv who at least partly redeemed himself.  We appear to have nothing in midfield or up front but Mauricio’s hand was forced as Gaston pulled up and Adam Lallana was sent on to try and sort it all out.

The shift in momentum is immediate as we get the ball down and start playing again, culminating in J-Rod firing straight at the keeper.  The passing is back and J-Rod slides JWP through on goal.  He seems to be held back but then brings down a defender as the keeper blocks it at his feet.  It’s bizarre as everyone seems to stop except for J-Rod who sticks the rebound in the net and no one really knows what’s happened with Adam Lallana looking the wrong way as J-Rod knocks it in.  The ref doesn’t make it clear and J-Rod doesn’t celebrate the goal as it’s against his former club which adds to the confusion but the goal is given and we’re back in front again.

So Burnley – nice fight back but you’re behind again now, please read the script and go away.  From their next attack, Ings smashes in another shot which beats Superkelv and pings off the post and away.  They’re not going to give up are they?  Maybe now they will as Superkelv launches one forward, J-Rod heads it on to Adam who runs at the defence and smashes one in the bottom corner from 25 yards with his left foot.  Great goal....4-2...  and relax!

A very damning indictment of Big Jos was up next as at 4-2 up against a Championship side, Mauricio decided he couldn’t risk leaving him on and so rather than give Harry Reed or Sam Gallagher some minutes, he hooked Jos and sent on Jose Fonte to protect the lead.  Just when I thought it would all settle down and peter out, Ings takes on Shaw and gets away a shot which is pushed wide by Superkelv for a corner.  The corner is swung in and everyone misses it expect Long who gets his knee on it down and it bounces down and kind of loops at 2mph over Not-so-Superkelv who appears to be digging for truffles in the goalmouth.  Bloody hell – again!

Out tactical masterplan for the last 3 minutes plus injury time is to keep possession which for two and half minutes goes really well as Burnley struggle to get a touch.  You knew what was coming though as Clyne and Davis got too close and screwed it up, one pass and Vokes was in on goal but luckily he overran the ball a bit and didn’t get a clean shot away.  More possession, two minutes go by and the final whistle blows.  Phew!

Overall this is probably a good result for everybody.  We won and got through and so give ourselves a bit of confidence, Burnley lost but put up a really decent showing and they can take that into the more important battle for promotion which they have over the next five months and no one wanted a draw.  It was an odd game as it looked like we would win 5-0 at the break but within 10 minutes we looked like we’d lose only for it to swing again.  For me, Sir Rickie going off was a contributory factor to the initial turnaround.  Though he wasn’t having the best of games, him going off meant we lost any foothold up front and until Adam Lallana came on we really struggled going forward.  J-Rod came good in the end with a goal and an assist but until Adam came on he once again gave weight to the theory that he is not a man to lead the line.  The centre halves proved what we know already in that Maya is a decent defender in the main but his distribution is suspect to say the least and that Big Jos is really struggling.  When he starts making mistakes he seems to let it bother him and he just keeps on getting worse, reminding me of Dan Harding from a couple of years back.  Another player who has gone off the boil is JWP but of course that can be put down the natural variations in form that can affect 18/19 year olds.  Oh yes… and we need King Artur back, big time.  The bottom line is that we won which is all that matters in the Cup and it's nice that we got 4 goals, scored by 4 different English players.

I spent the first half thinking that the Championship must be really really shite this year if Burnley are in the top 2 but in the second half they proved what they are about and did really well.  Like I said at the start, a proper club with proper fans it would be fantastic if they went up and those shits at QPR did not.  The manager should be congratulated as well.  It would have been easy for him to pack the midfield and leave one of his main strikers out but fair play to him, he played them both and went for it and it nearly worked.

As I write we have just come out of the hat in the 4^th Round draw and we’ve got Yeovil at home who are at the other end of the Championship and they contain tow of our former players in Sam Hoskins and desperate Dan Seaborne who probably won’t be going clubbing in town after the game.  To me this is a fantastic draw as it’s a game we should win and it gives the clubs a challenge to set ticket process to ensure that some people turn up.  I’m sure you’re reading this Don Cortese so a tenner for adults, a fiver for codgers and teenagers and a quid for under 11s…. please.

Back to the league and we are back at SMS on Saturday against West Brom who are on the crest of a slump.  They still have no manager after dispensing with Steve Clarke but they do have some good players on the books so it’ll be a test but it’s a game we really need to win to keep us as a favourite for one of the top 10 positions.