FA Cup 4th Round - Southampton 2 Yeovil 0

One Step Closer.

There once was a time in the recent past, when I had nothing to write about in the buildup to games aside from positive stuff.  After all, it’s been a steady upward progression since this blog started in 2009.  Just recently though, it’s been a whirlwind of shite and this weeks instalment saw a statement from the club that Dani ‘The Prick’ Osvaldo had been banned by 2 weeks by the club for an incident on the training ground.  It turns out that the incident involved him kicking and head-butting Jose Fonte.  Who he nutted is largely irrelevant aside from the fact that the typical Italian coward picked on one of the seemingly more docile members of the squad.  There is one train of thought kicking round that The Prick is trying to engineer a move away from the club and so did it deliberately.  Let’s assume that’s true for a second and say that it therefore stands to reason that he picked Jose out.  Out of the other fit defenders, I’m sure that Jos or Maya would have flattened him and it doesn’t bear thinking about what would have happened if he’s picked on Sir Rickie or King Artur.  I’m sure that Scouse or Polish justice would have prevailed.  I’m only surprised that he didn’t pick on one of the kids.

The message seems to be that The Prick is gone and won’t be welcomed back.  Two weeks neatly takes us past the end of the transfer window and though we may have to take a bit of a financial hit, there will be list of viable clubs looking to do a deal as well as West Ham.  He isn’t going to change, he’s 28 and he’s been drummed out of practically every club he’s ever had which is the only reason we were able to sign him in the first place.  Once he’s gone, there’s no doubt we will find out his side of the story as The Prick won’t be able to keep his mouth shut.  He has severely let everyone down especially Mauricio and there is no excuse.  I’ve seen it written that he may have been frustrated in playing out of position and to this I give the counter argument that this is utter bollocks.  He’s a nutcase, capable of brilliant things like his goal against City but ultimately a fucking waster who thinks he’s better than he is.  Here’s to hoping he moves to a shit club and doesn’t make the Italian World Cup squad.

There was also confirmation this week that Gaston Ramirez and Dejan Lovren would be out for about 2 months each with ankle ligament damage which we all kind of expected.  Hopefully they’ll get back for us in April and the layoff won’t do their individual World Cup chances any harm.

So to today and toYeovil Town at home in the FA Cup 4^th Round.  It’s a nice trip down memory lane to our League 1 days.  Yeovil managed to get promoted via the Playoffs last year and are in the Championship, albeit near the bottom of it.  The biggest shame is that they’ve recently sold Desperate Dan Seaborne as it would have been nice to see him try and prove my assertion that he was barely a footballer, wrong.

There’s always a bit of an intake of breath before the team is announced for an FA Cup match, especially as mention was continually made in the buildup to Arsenal’s visit here on Tuesday night.  As it turns out the line-up wasn’t that bad.  Superkelv in goal, Maya and Jos auditioning to partner Jose on Tuesday and J-Rod given another chance to prove he can lead the line.  There was a welcome (by me anyway) return for Guly on the left with the rest of the team being made up of first team regulars.  Missing were Sir Rickie and King Artur who were both nursing minor knocks and the bench was full of kids with Calum Chambers, Sam Gallagher, Harry Reed, Lloyd Isgrove and Gaz Timebomb all on there.

We made a slowish start and Yeovil seemed quite well set up. They had the standard two banks of four and then Hayter playing off of the obligatory Championship Big Unit in Ismael Miller who looked huge.  Didn’t he used to play for West Brom?  A quick check reveals that he’s now at Nottingham Forest and shock of shocks, he’s on loan. 

Guly has started well for us and his first few touches are received well by the crowd around me anyway (Kingsland centre).  He’s always trying to make things happen but others are letting him down at the moment with Lallana looking off the pace and J-Rod not being strong enough on the ball.  It’s all kind of lame with neither team looking like it has a cutting edge.  As if to illustrate that, our first shot is by Corky and guess where it ended up?

The first serious chance falls to us and J-Rod who moves onto a Morgan pass across the top of the box and sidefoots it straight at the keeper.  My eyes go to the heavens as they seem to do at least once every match at least.  The next chance also falls to J-Rod and this time he leaps superbly to meet Clyne’s hanging cross and thumps a header off of the bar.  Maybe Jay should just head everything.

On 22 minutes, JWP swings over a corner, it clears the main melee of players and a Yeovil defender, for reasons known only to himself, reaches up and handles the ball above his head.  There’s hardly an appeal as it’s that obvious and the referee points to the spot.  The offending player goes to argue with the ref and then the Yoevil skipper wades in and gets booked.  What the fuck are you complaining about guys?  There’s no one near him and he’s stuck his hand above his head and flapped it away.  Call ‘Arry Redknapp to see if he’s put a million on Yeovil conceding a penalty or something.  So, we’ve been given a penalty and Adam Lallana tosses the ball to J-Rod who I assume is going to pass it straight to the goalkeeper.  However, he hands it to Guly who is going to take it.  I can’t say that I’m confident but I’m really hoping for his sake that he scores and thankfully he coolly rolls it in the opposite corner to where Stech has dived.  Guly’s relief is obvious and so is his team-mates delight at the goal.  What’s not to like?

Yeovil seem slightly shellshocked as teams often are after they concede a ridiculous goal and a flowing move ends with Lallana out on the left and his chip across bounces off top of the bar.  The Championship side snap out of it though and create their best chance as Ralls finds space on the left and sends in a low cross. Hayter has got in front of Shaw and gets a toe to it and his effort hits Superkelv who luckily is in the right place.  Back up the other end and a great ball from Corky puts Lallana in possession and he sets it up superbly for J-Rod who has a clear shot from the edge of the box but again he shats it straight at the keeper who doesn’t have to move.  It’s identical to the one he missed at Sunderland when Sir Rickie did the hard work and laid it on a plate, only for J-Rod to casually pass it to the keeper.  Argh! 

The 45 minutes are up and the extra minute has been played but Yeovil break out so the ref plays on.  The ball is eventually crossed over and The Big Unit has a chance at the back post but he leans back and skies it over the bar.  Can we have half time now ref?  Yes we can.

We start the second half like a proverbial bag of shit and Yeovil come very close to scoring as Ayling sidefoots a shot towards the bottom corner by Superkelv defies his 130 years and gets down quickly to push it round the post.

Guly is beginning to tire in what is after all, his first game for nearly a year and he’s hooked on 55 and it’s nice to see Sam Gallagher come on instead of a ‘safe’ replacement like Steven Davis.  No slight on Guly here but with Big Sam up front and J-Rod on the left we immediately look much better balanced.  Talking of forwards, Yeovil are now petering out in that area and Miller is looking seriously slow.  I can’t make up my mind if he’s all muscles (like Radhi Jaidi) or if he’s carrying some serious extra timber (like the Yeovil supporter I saw outside in a 5XL shirt).

Saints are beginning to take over now and the 2^nd and clinching goal only seems like a matter of time away.  JWP smashes one just over from the edge of the box, Stech makes a comfortable save from Clyne as he tries to repeat his goal from the last round and Big Sam gets the ball on the left win, cuts past a defender and hammers it, forcing Stech to parry it out towards the penalty spot and the keeper gets lucky as it falls to no one.

Nathaniel Clyne then gets booked for what I didn’t even think was a foul but it doesn’t matter a few minutes later as Corky drives forward and slides the ball to Big Sam on the right where he bulldozes past the last defender and from a tight angle, fires left footed through the keeper and in.  Great goal and the first of many for the new big man.  All he needs to do now is grow his hair, get some tattoos and glasses and twat a few of his team-mates and he’ll have a good career in the game.  Maybe if this Gallagher was related to Liam or Frank Gallagher then he might be a bit punchy but lets hope he lets his football do the talking.

With 20 minutes to go, Adam Lallana is subbed and Steve Davis comes on with the Irishman’s presence bringing with it a rain and hail storm of biblical proportions for about 10 minutes.  Both teams seemed to struggle with it but it must be easier playing in shocking conditions when you’re 2-0 up than when you’re 2-0 down.

Saints are creating a lot of chances now as the game gets stretched and Yeovil appear to be playing with 7 up front.  From a JWP delivery into the box, big Jos flicks it on, Davis knocks it back across and Big Sam smashes it goalwards where it hits Stech and bounces clear.  From where I was it looked over the line but I expect that goal line technology is switched off for the FA Cup even though it’s certainly available at Premier League grounds.

The monsoon abates and Harrison Reed comes on for JWP.  We must be the only team who brings on an 18 year old and the average age of the team stays the same.  His first contribution is to charge down the right, collect a pass from Steve Davis and then clip a perfect return cross over the centre halves to where Davis saw his volley acrobatically clawed away by Stech.   Big Sam then attempted a ridiculous spin turn in the box and got his shot away but Stech blocked again and the rebound hit Sam and bounced out for a goal kick.  The rest of the game petered out and the final whistle send and the non-green members of the 24,000+ crowd home happy.

It was a pretty comfortable win at the end of it all.  Yeovil had huffed and puffed and had done well in all but the final third where they really barely threatened.  Jos and Maya looked like an accident waiting to happen at all time but weren’t tested enough, even when Yeovil had two 7 footers up front at the end.  Fair play to them though, they came and had a go and their support was magnificent throughout.  I think we’d have probably won anyway but it really helped with that twat gifting us the first goal with the handball for the penalty.  What the hell he was doing I’ll never know.  I hope they manage to achieve their season objective and stay up as there is absolutely nothing to dislike about Yeovil at all.

The post match reaction was predictably all about the two goalscorers.  I’ll have to have a look back through the archives to see why Guly became a scapegoat but it certainly wasn’t for playing like he did today.  He was purposeful and direct in possession and always looking to go forward and make things happen.  He didn’t look interested in sideways and backwards which is a good thing.  Maybe he missed a couple of easy chances way back when in much the same way that J-Rod does in every game.  Whatever the reason it’s clearly ridiculous and if he’s our Pirate replacement for the rest of the season then that’s fine by me. 

The other goalscorer, Sam Gallagher, looks to have something about him.  A good first touch, a touch of skill and a yard of pace and he’s direct as well.  He was looking to make forward runs the whole time and this is something that I hope is not coached out of him in favour of becoming a back-to-goal centre forward.  He had to wait a few minutes for his first touch and when he finally got it out on the left wing, cut in, bang, forcing a save from the keeper – love it!  He got his goal and was unlucky on another couple of occasions.  Once again, if he’s our Pirate replacement for the rest of the season then that’s fine by me.

The other news from the game was the presence of Katharina Liebherr in the Directors Box.  She had obviously decided to show up to see what a meltdown looks like, especially one which she caused herself.  I wonder what she made of it and I wonder what The Sun will make of the picture of this woman who knows nothing about football looking delighted and applauding Sam Gallagher’s goal.

As I write on Sunday, the draw has been made and yet again we’ve got bloody Sunderland away who, as I said last week, are shit but we never beat them.  This is the one boys, this is the one!  The rest of the draw had pitted Man City at home to Chelsea and Arsenal at home to Liverpool so it opens up if we get through as two of the big boys will be history.

Next up we have a nice easy one against Arsenal at home, one of three teams who have a realistic chance of winning the league.  At home we’ve lost to Chelsea and drawn with Man City so The Gunners are going down.  If you’re still looking for a meltdown, follow Piers Morgan on Twitter if we do derail the Arsenal title bid.

 Artur says: Take me on Osvaldo, I Fucking Dare You!