League 1 Match 45 - Plymouth 1 Southampton 3

Thank you Boys!!!

Here we go again, down to the home of the Green Army, who have had the season from hell and are six points from safety with two games left having being docked 10 for going into administration.  Sounds familiar doesn’t it.  Not a great prospect considering that they have to play us and we need 3 points to seal promotion. This as the game I’d been looking forward to for about 5 weeks as it was impossible for bloody Huddersfield to win today as it was our one remaining game in hand.  If you remember, this is the game postponed from when Plymouth had 3 international call ups to New Zealand, Zimbabwe and some other country ranked about 400.  Never mind, we got there in the end.

In effect, we have to win either today or on Saturday against Walsall at SMS.  Walsall are like Plymouth in that they are fighting for survival and they are also like them in that they have funny accents.  If I could choose, I would of course choose to win today because it gets it out of the way and I hate those nerve shredding do-or-die games where you just know that your team is going to make a bollocks of it.

There were a few issues regarding the team to be sorted out today.  The last time we played twice in three days, Nigel made 6 changes but this time it’s just the 3 with Butters and Dicko replacing Richardson and the injured Harding at full backs and with the Gulyman not being fit, Stephens came in.  I hoped and I prayed that there was no diamond formation but Dave Merrington said that Chappers was playing on the right and he knows everything.  Surprises a-plenty on the bench with the return of Morgan Schneiderlin who had been out for two months and even more remarkably – Lee Holmes was on the bench and evidently, whilst injured he’s found an activity he can do without injury and that’s growing his hair.  Careful though Lee, those Alice bands are heavy.

99 Red Balloons and a few white ones are not so much floating in the summer sky but parked in the penalty area in front of Kelvin Davis.  The game was delayed while he went on a one man mission to burst them all before the defenders eventually got bored and joined in.  Not one balloon could withstand the Jaidi stomp.

Plymouth are in the last chance saloon as I said and start the game pretty well.  Bolasie takes a tumble in the box under challenge from Dicko and the referee tells him to get up and get on with it.  It’s a scare though and Saints need to settle down and start playing which they attempt to do.  Plymouth and their manager with a monkey’s head have identified Adam Lallana as the danger man and their players take turns to go and kick him.

Saints are beginning to turn the screw and win corner after corner but only sporadically threaten a goal with Stephens shooting wide from one chance and Butterfield getting into nosebleed territory on another occasion before firing over.  To be fair it’s a closely contested half with Saints just on top and Argyle not looking like they are capable to testing Davis in his balloon free goal.

A massive amount of pressure was lifted in the 44^th minute when Butters came down the right wing and switched it onto his swinger.  The left footed cross was straight onto Sir Rickie’s head, thump, over the keeper, 1-0 and his 20^th goal of the season and the Saints fans are going absolutely mental.  Unsurprisingly, there are a few who completely blow their cover by going mental in the Plymouth end – get home safely boys.

As a fan, I’m feeling the pressure at the start of the second half and I’m strolling around on the beach at Netley with Dave Merrington in my ear and I’m throwing stones at the oil refinery without much success.  Plymouth win a free kick right on the edge of our box which earns big Radhi a booking before it gets smashed into the wall.  It takes all of a minute for the nerves to go but not before some serious oohs and ahhs as Jaidi rises and thumps a header from Lallana’s corner against the post.  The ball gets cleared back out to Lallana and eventually finds its way to Connolly in the box who tries to twist into position to shoot but a defender gets a foot in and succeeds only in poking it to Dickson who fires in off the post.  Sods law says the ex-Plymouth man would score the goal that probably takes them down.

Seaborne comes on for Chaplow before the game kicks off again and goes to left back with Dicko going into midfield.  Plymouth are deflated now and don’t really look like getting back into it at all so it’s no surprise when it’s definitely all over on the hour when Connolly plays Sir Rickie through and he’s tripped as the ball reaches him – penalty.  You know he’s going to miss a penalty one day but today is not the day, bang, 3-0, party time.

Martin comes on for Jaidi and Schneiderlin makes a welcome re-appearance in place of Lallana as the game winds down.  David Connolly is carrying round a bag of icing and he tries to put it on top of the cake in the 85^th minute by trying an outrageous left footed shot from 35 yards which beats the keeper and crashes back off the bar.  His personal mission to get a goal nearly bears fruit a minute later but his low shot fizzes across the goal and wide.

Everything that happens is academic now but it still rankles with the Saints defence when Plymouth’s liveliest player, Yannick Bolasie, plays a nice 1-2 on the edge of our box and finishes well to make it 3-1.  Kelvin has a bit of a jump-up-and-down mini tantrum like you see 6 year olds have in supermarkets but I’m sure it was all forgotten a minute later. Final whistle, all over, WE ARE GOING UP!!!!

Nigel makes me laugh at the end – one minute he’s bouncing round the pitch in pure celebratory ‘we are going up’ mode and then he’s being interviewed, saying that it’s not over and we still have work to do.  I would imagine the next few days at training will be a bit of a laugh but we do have a job to do in that we have to put up a performance against Walsall to ensure that no fingers are pointed if they beat us 3-0 and stay up because of it.  I’m hoping the Walsall boys turn out in force and drink as heavily as they did last year.  Good night that was.  So we need to beat them and Walsall to stay up anyway.

I would also like to thank Radio Solent at this point for not having Mr Pedantic commentating on the game where he would have no doubt spent all game criticizing anyone who suggested that Saints were going up and insisting that he was right, me, me, me, it’s all about me.  There is no ‘I’ in team, there is one in ‘Pedantic’, there are three in ‘irritating’ and there are none in ‘Closet Skate’. 

A word at this point for Huddersfield Town who are I think, 24 games unbeaten and in 3^rd place, with a points tally that would have won the league in other years.  I really hope they win the playoffs as it would be just and right.  The local connection means that I should be hoping Bournemouth win it but then I think of Eddie Mitchell.  Huddersfield are easily one of the best 3 teams in this league so I hope they are one of the 3 promoted teams.  To me, the league should be a test of who the three best teams are and not reduced to a lottery to define the 46 games that went before it.  Knockout games should be for knockout competitions. Having said that, I’m sure we’ll be aiming for the playoffs next season and this year, my crystal ball sees a Huddersfield v Peterborough final and Fergie Zero going all red faced, crying about the referee, generally being a sore losing twat, losing all his good players in the summer, being lower mid-table next season and getting sacked around Christmas prompting Fergie Snr to take back all the loan players he’s sent to Peterborough which results in them plummeting down the league and getting relegated back to League 2.

The result today and what it means is a total vindication of Nicola Cortese and what he has put in place at Southampton FC, especially the decision at the start of the season to replace Alan Pardew with Nigel Adkins.  It must be remembered that a vast majority of our squad are Pardew signings but the Don didn’t think he was the man to take us forward and he stuck his neck out and today proved that he was right.  I hear he was on the pitch at the end which I reckon he would have enjoyed even more than Wembley last year.  It’s just a tragedy that Markus Liebherr, his friend with the little camera, couldn’t be there as well.

On that subject, an appeal has been launched to raise money for a massive tribute flag for Markus.  Mike, the guy behind this, is a personal friend of mine (and a really bad cricketer... I mean really bad, can’t even carry drinks properly) and there is no way anyone can underestimate or fail to understand what Markus has done for this club.  So if you enjoyed the trip to Wembley last season, enjoyed the promotion today or maybe even if you enjoy reading this shite every week then visit.....

www.onemarkusliebherr.co.uk

.... as none of this would have happened without him.

As mentioned, next week we have Walsall at home.... our missing 10,000 will be back and there will be people moaning because they didn’t see it coming and haven’t got tickets.  Party time and I’m looking forward to hearing what the Chuckle Brothers have got to moan about.

I repeat, WE ARE GOING UP !!!

1 game to go, 0 points needed.

Thank you, Sir !