Sir Rickie and Deano play 'Spot the Wanker'It's an interesting day for yours truly - I am out on the beer tonight with my mates from school and guess where my school was .... Portsmouth and so guess who all this crowd of mates support... The Cheating Skate Bastards. As we were drinking in Southsea I knew I was going to take a load of shite for the 4-1 defeat and I also knew that I woulod be unable to really give it loads regarding my opinions on their shitty club. It's hard to talk too loudly when you have a peg on your nose to keep the smell out so what I really needed was at least one of two things today - a Saints win at Tranmere and the Skates getting knocked out of the FA Cup by Birmingham.
On the back of our two big home wins comes a trip to Tranmere who are hovering just above the relegation zone, their new manager having managed to improve on the results achieved by John Barnes, possibly the worst manager ever. All the pre-match stuff coming from the Saints camp in the week had been about the need to prove ourselves on poor pitches. Whilst I agree that this is true, I also think that if you make a massive issue out of something then it becomes more of a problem.
It always makes me laugh when professional footballers make an issue out of poor pitches having spent a lifetime playing myself on such billiard tables as The Veracity Ground, Mansel Park and Mayfield Park to name but three. Admittedly, no one besieged internet message boards when the ball took a bobble and I hoofed it in the river. My advice to Pards though is to not train at Staplewood in the lead up to a poor pitch away game but go and train on the Veracity Dogshit Arena for a week.
Our team was unchanged for the game with Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain retaining his place on the bench, meaning that Markus had to cough up approximately another £100 getting his name put on the back of an away shirt as well.
It’s a bright start for Saints and we look to have settled well but the first time Tranmere load the ball into our box, we go 1-0 down as Puncheon (5ft 5ish) was left marking some giant bloke on the back post who headed back across (despite Punch’s efforts to put him off by falling over and trying to bite him on the ankle) and Marlon Broomes had a free header which deflected off of Fonte and past Davis for 1-0.
Similar to the Walsall game when we fell behind early, I was expecting an instant response and we came flying back at them and eight minutes later were level as a Lallana managed to get in a powerful volley (as opposed to his usual half-hit bobbler) which was kicked off the line but he rebound was controlled by Barnard and lashed home. 1-1 and we would now walk this.
The rest of the first half was pretty much all Saints with Lallana managing to skew a shot across the goal when he looked odds-on to score and a Puncheon corner causing havoc with both Fonte and Jaidi just failing to get the important touch. No goal though and Nostradamus Dave Merrington speculated that this would haunt us.
Half time, 1-1
When the second half is analyzed, it can be split into the first 35 minutes and the last 10. The first 35 is quite even with Kelvin making a couple of blocks and the Tranmere keeper doing the same. To summarize, Saints best chances fell to Barnard who forced a great save when he let a long ball roll across him before turning and lashing it first time, Sir Rickie who fired a 30 yard free kick just over and Lallana who got the finishing nightmares again when he hit the keeper when two foot either side would have put us in front again. Overall though, it’s not really happening for Saints and we went into the last 10 with Pards making two substitutions designed to win the game with Papa Waigo and Antonio replacing Barnard and Lallana.
The next chance fell to Tranmere however as some bloke called Edds backed into the penalty area, sensed Dan Seaborne (who had come on for the injured Harding) behind him and fell over him. ‘Penalty’ said no one in particular but the little wanker in the red gave it and after a couple of Saints bookings for dissent, Ian Thomas-Moore scored it despite Davis going the right way. I’ve since watched the decision a couple of times on and all that can be said about it is that it’s a shocker.
The referee managed to show his consistency a couple of minutes later as Fonte went to ground in their box in slightly theatrical fashion and we got the same result, a decision in favour of Tranmere and Southampton players getting booked.
Final Score – Tranmere 2 Southampton FFS FC 1
Just when you thought we may have a chance of sneaking into the playoffs…. no, again. Before the match we were 14 points behind the team in 6th (Huddersfield) and had two games in hand. Now, we’re 15 points behind Millwall with just the one game in hand. It could have been a worse day however with both Huddersfield and Swindon losing.
So why the non-performance today? I find it hard to believe that the players rolled up thinking they just had to turn up to win but one or two did sound flat for today. Whilst the referee can take some of the blame, the fact is that we should be much better than these teams and the odd dodgy decision by the ref shouldn’t enter into the equation. Having said that though – we wouldn’t have lost if it hadn’t been for a shite decision for the penalty and we did have chances to win this but unlike the past two matches, we didn’t take them. A more general observation would be that we do not get the same command of the midfield in away games when the pitch prevents us passing the ball.
We have a week off now before next Saturday against Leeds, swiftly followed by Tuesday at home to Swindon. Like the Walsall and Huddersfield double, we have to win them both and you know what – I reckon we will. We’ll reel it in again and start believing again and then it’s MK Dons away on their cabbage patch who we’ve already beaten three times this season and you just know what will happen there… unless we train on the Veracity Dogshit Ground the week before….
As for my night on the beer in Southsea - I just drank to dull the pain of the football, it was a laugh and they were relatively gentle with me.
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