EFL Championship Match 41 - Southampton 3 Watford 2

Mental

Watford for the fourth time this season, having played them in the FA Cup twice and also the return fixture in the league. We are undefeated over those three games but need slightly more than to just remain undefeated today.  The most important of the three games played so far was of course the league game at Vicarage Road which we made a bollocks off in the last minute when THB made a bad decision as to whether to head away a punt upfield or let it run, and then Baz produced one of his famous dives that go nowhere and the ball went into the middle of the goal. It was a real “for fuck‘s sake“ moment…. Two points in the bin.

Whilst the first three games against Watford were amazingly against the same manager, Valerian Ishmael, eventually went the way of all other Watford managers and was sacked a month or so ago to be replaced with Tom Cleverley, the recently retired former Manchester United player who, because he played for Manchester United, won several caps for England, at a time when they really must’ve been fucking giving them away.  Cleverley the manager though, has made a decent start with Watford unbeaten in five though it is of course too late to do anything meaningful about this season with them destined to finish smack bang in the middle of the table. In theory, they should be the perfect opposition for us today, or so I thought, until they battled to a 0-0 draw at Portman Road against Ipswich a few days ago. Watford will bring a competitive edge to this game in the shape of good old Wesley Hoedt at the back and his partner Ryan Porteous, who has been a complete thug in all the games that we’ve had against them so far this season. Hopefully we get a referee who knows what he’s doing.

Yes, the midweek results were truly interesting with us picking up three points, in amongst a defeat for Leicester and draws for Leeds and Ipswich. The question of “is it back on?“, still has an answer of no but let’s revisit it after our next three games. Win today, at home to Preston on Tuesday and away at Cardiff next Saturday and it might look a bit more feasible and the answer to the question at that point we will probably be “maybe“.  I am still very firmly of the opinion at this moment, that we fucked it by not beating Middlesbrough and then losing to Ipswich.

On the subject of the promotion race, currently top are Leicester City, who have had a bit of a cloud hanging over them in the shape of Profit and Sustainability charges hanging over them from last season in the Premier League, when they of course got relegated.  The news has just come in that they can’t possibly face any points penalty deductions this season, mainly because there is nothing written in the rules that says that the EFL can impose any punishments for breaches whilst in the Premier League.  Bit of a joke really. The EFL statement, and I’m paraphrasing here, basically says that you committed these offences last season and you have massively benefited this season as a result, but we can’t do anything about it because it didn’t happen in our league. The final pisstake will be if they get promoted, found guilty and get a points deduction next season. With more and more clubs falling foul of the rules and just dragging it out through a legal process, I feel there needs to be a change of approach from the people who administer the game.  In Leicester‘s case, I don’t feel that they should be allowed to be promoted until they have proved that they haven’t broken any rules. So – put a date on it and tell them they have to prove innocence before then.  That would speed the process up rather than what we have now which is the governing body having to prove that they are guilty which is subject to legal challenge and delay all over the place. I know this is basically saying you are guilty until proven innocent, but the current system we have of sorting out these issues, let alone when they fall between two governing bodies, is an absolute joke.

Back here, Russell Martin has some decisions to make today in his starting lineup, namely restoring Jan Bednarek or the team or not and if he does, is it in place of Martin’s son, Jack Stephens or do we change formation and do the Poundshop Pep thing. Personally, I think he has to bite the bullet and bring Bednarek back in and leave Stephens out as leaving everything else aside, we didn’t do the Poundshop thing on Tuesday and won our first game in four. Bednarek and THB are our best combination and that’s all there is to it.

The one problem I have with playing to conventional back four is that it would include James Bree, who, despite what many seem to think, I don’t think has been playing well enough to warrant being in the side after being partially or wholly at fault for goals against Ipswich and Coventry.  He does not fill me with confidence. The other question pertains to whether Stuart Armstrong comes back into the team in place of either Joe Aribo or Russell Martin’s other son, Will Smallbone. To me, this is an absolute no brainer as Joe Aribo has been our best player over the last three games.  Bring on 2pm.

It's 2pm and the team news and perhaps unsurprisingly, it’s the same lineup that played against Coventry. The only tweak appears to be on the bench with Ryan Manning replacing Shea Charles.  Of more interest in the concourse is Leeds versus Blackburn on the screens with Sammie Szmodics scoring with ten minutes to go and Blackburn holding on relatively comfortably.  More incentive.

Away we go with Smallbone to Aribo in the middle of the park, out left to KWP and onto Adam Armstrong to have a run at Porteous.. but all he does it switch it onto his right foot to sling it into the box and there is Smallbone, completely unmarked, rising to head easily into the net past a static Bachmann, as he looks at a static Hoedt and a static Pollock. What a start. Get in.

Watford really don’t look arsed as Bachmann kicks one short out Dele-Bashiru on the edge of the box and he pisses around with it and Smallbone slides in and pokes it to Brooks.  One return ball later and Smallbone is through and the option of squaring to Arma is there but the eyes light up and he lashes it over the bar.

It’s all us though and it seems like a matter of time.  Aribo and Adam Armstrong combine again to feed KWP who is faced with two defenders but he muscles his way past the much bigger Porteous and takes out the other with a ball across, where in front of his own goal, Dele-Bashiru slices the clearance and it looks like it’s going out for a corner but David Brooks keeps it alive and instinctively knocks it back to the edge of the six-yard box and Che  Adams is there to poke it into the net. Two fucking nil already – love it lads.

Watford look absolutely there for the taking and Aribo dances in from the right, beating three players with body swerves but just as we’re about to witness goal of the season, he loses it.  Watford have their first chance when Hoedt goes through the back of Brooks but no free-kick is give and they break down our left with Asprilla under pressure from KWP, flashes a shot wide.  Watford seem to suddenly fancy it and once more, Asprilla causes havoc, burrowing into he penalty area before dragging it across goal again.

We are suddenly not holding the ball in midfield and Watford are now the better side. We don’t seem to be able to keep possession and Watford keep picking it up in midfield and Kayembe gets into the box but it’s cleared by THB back out to Porteous who hammers it, flicking off Jack Stephens head giving Baz no chance.  Fuck, and Watford are back in it. We’ve done our usual and stepped off the gas for ten minutes and of course, we have conceded.

We have one more chance ourselves before half time as we break and Downes fires up a bomb towards Adam Armstrong, that he brings down brilliantly before finding a bit of room and firing over the bar.  A positive end after a very dodgy twenty minutes or so.

We just have to get back on it after half time.  Another goal and these will pack it in and it’ll be comfortable.  No changes and away we go.  Russell has obviously noticed that the right to left diagonal is one and it’s another big one from THB out to Adam Armstrong and once again, he takes it down well before make his way across the penalty area and over the bar again.

After that, it’s back to being not great again and Watford are swarming all over us trying to force a mistake at the back. We are passing it around like the kamikaze player from the back merchants that we are but there is a collective cringe when Baz has to deal with something horrible and bobbly coming his way.  It’s nearly 2-2 when Lewis hangs up a cross at the back post which Porteous meets and it’s past Baz but THB has got back behind him to hack it off the line.

Early subs on 55 minutes with Stuart Armstrong and Ryan Fraser on for Brooks and Aribo.  The correct players caming off I feel as Aribo has looked tired and Brooks has not been involved since Watford got more aggressive with their press and has been a bit of a passenger.   There’s another decent chance for Watford but Chakvetadze lashes at it and Row Z’s it.

The game becomes a bit of a stodge in midfield until Saints manage a nice bit of play and Adam Armstrong is put away behind the defence on the right and he gets his head up and puts it across to Wee Man, who takes one touch and smashes it past Bachman into the net but the fucking flag has gone up straight away. Unless he’s decided late that Armstrong is offside, I don’t really see what the problem is here but regardless, disallowed.  The free-kick is taken from where Fraser was though, so either Wee Man has been brainless with his run or the decision is plain wrong.  Anyway, Manning on for Bree who looks like he’s limping.

Ten to go and more subs and we look to close the game down.  For reasons unknown, the industrious Adams is replaced with Mara and in addition, Jan Bednarek is on for Smallbone, which means Stephens going to midfield and Downes taking Smallbone’s place.  It all looks a bit makeshift and it almost immediately costs us as a ball forward is misjudged by Downes in the centre of the pitch and substitute Kone picks it up behind Stephens and works his way to the edge of the box and passes it superbly into the far corner. For fuck‘s sake.

Playoffs It Is Then....

It unsurprisingly gets a bit feisty now and there are a couple of flashpoints.  Firstly, Wee Man flies into Bachmann, trying to win a ball he was perfectly entitled to go for and the Watford keeper goes for the full roll-around until it becomes obvious that Wee Man is only getting a yellow card.  Then he instantly goes from ‘dead’ to ‘perfectly ok’.  It’s the sort of thing that should get you booked for attempting to deceive an official.  Secondly, Porteous hits the deck with the finger of accusation being pointed at Sekou Mara.  I didn’t really see it but big bad hard man Porteous hitting the deck under challenge from Mara is as amusing as it comes.

Ninety minutes up and 6 goes up on the board.  The first real action if extra time is Manning getting a good ball over from the left, which Adam Armstrong volleys into the ground but it’s one of those ones it one of those ones that’s dropping in the net and Bachmann makes his first save of the game.  Bachmann has clearly enjoyed being centre stage for the last few minutes and now is wasting time every time he gets the ball.  Arsehole.

With an unlikely tilt at the top two fading away, Saints win a free kick 40 yards out as big donkey Rajovic tries a wrestling throw on Bednarek.  In it comes from Manning and Bednarek’s header is deflected wide for a corner. We are now in the eight minute of the six added.  In it comes from Manning, flicked on by THB and someone at the back post pokes it into the net.  Pandemonium. I’m up the other end and have no idea who has scored but all I know is that no flag is up, the ref is pointing the middle, we don’t have to wait ten minutes for some prick at Stockleigh Park to analyse it and even though all the Watford players are appealing for something, it's a fucking goal.  I can see a big pile of bodies in the opposite corner to me and I can see Bachmann holding his head in despair.  Good. Wanker.  Flynn Downes is announced as the goalscorer and one boot forward from the kick off and it’s done.  Mental again.

Loan players Eh?

This club is going to fucking kill me, I swear.

Being 2-0 up we should’ve course won comfortably but that’s not the Southampton way is it? Oh no, we’ve got a throw in an hour of being incredibly average and allowing the opposition, who have absolutely nothing to play for, to probably be the better side over that period in which they scored two goals.  Having been handed a potential olive branch (let’s call it that) with all the other sides at the top falling over, we look destined to absolutely not grasp it… and then we score in the 98th minute In front of about 80% of the crowd that was there at the start because loads had fucked off home at that point. Ridiculous football club, just ridiculous.

It absolutely seemed like it was going to be a stroll in the park after we took the lead within two minutes as Watford couldn’t really be arsed to close down the cross from Adam Armstrong and no one was picking up Will Smallbone in the middle. Nice and easy, 1-0. It all looked plain sailing straight after that with David Brooks and ultimately Che Adams benefiting from a shite missed clearance in front of goal.  Watford looked like they couldn’t have been less bothered and Saints at that stage looked like they were going to score six or seven.

As is always the case though, when we step off the gas for any period of time, we concede a goal. We step off the gas so often, I wonder if we are trying to save money. We are absolutely incapable of playing below full throttle and not throwing a goal in. There had been warnings before Porteous’ deflected strike hit the net.

In the second half, to me, though we had a couple a half chances and then the disallowed goal for Ryan Fraser.  In real time I of course thought that he should never be offside in that scenario and I was blaming the Wee Man for being a little bit brainless but when you look at a replay, Wee Man has got it spot-on and there is absolutely no way that that should be given as offside.  That would have killed the game stone dead but I never really felt like we were in control and Watford deserved their equaliser which was to be fair, a lovely finish by Kone.  It was a goal that had started with a typically embarrassing effort of a challenge by our centre forward substitute Sekou Mara, who gets worse with every passing game.  Downes and Stephens didn’t cover themselves in glory either.

It looked like everything was shite in extra time but thanks to Watford time-wasting, there was enough time left for us to win the corner which Ryan Manning produced from and THB and Flynn Downes did the rest to send everybody still in the ground absolutely bananas.

As you expect from such an up-and-down game, it was a bit of a mixed bag with regards to individual performances. Joe Aribo wasn’t quite the force of the past couple of weeks and looked tired. Adam Armstrong on the other hand had a really good game and bizarrely, had a really good “first touch” game, which is not always a strength of his to put it politely. I thought the star of the show however was THB, particularly in the second half when we were under pressure.

The substitutions were interesting to say the least. The right players in Brooks and Aribo were replaced but the replacements Ryan Fraser and Stuart Armstrong didn’t exactly set the world alight.  Stu in particular really struggled to get to the pace of the game.  Because we didn’t have Shea Charles on the bench, we made another substitution which resulted in Jack Stephens going into midfield which was a substitution made to close the game down at 2-1 and when that didn’t work, it looked like that substitution, as well as taking Che Adams off for Mara, had been a massive mistake as we now needed a goal. However, we came out smiling.  Was it handball?  Inconclusive I'd say - hits his chest first and you can't really see after that.  Most of the Watford players appealed but I kind of think that everyone is conditioned to appeal these days if it's anywhere near an arm, so I wouldn't take that as too much of a guide.

Russell Threatens to Punch Legal Threats in the Face

Watford manager Tom Cleverley made an absolute prick of himself post-match.  Complained about the time being added on to injury time, which was mainly caused by his goalkeeper wasting time. Complained that there was a handball on the winner, which isn;t really conclusive. He also complained that we apparently should’ve had a red card for a challenge on Daniel Bachmann, who rolled around until it was obvious that there wasn’t gonna be a red card and then got up and was perfectly okay. Go fuck yourself Tom.  Tom didn’t complain too much about the Ryan Fraser disallowed goal which would’ve killed the game stone dead and because that decision wrongly went in Watford’s favour, it enabled them to go straight up our end and equalise.  Get the Fraser decision right and the extra time and the possible handball would be irrelevant.  He made some bizarre comment about there being millions on the line for Leeds, Leicester and Ipswich.  Yes mate, don’t know why you care about Leicester in particular but both of they need the millions to spend paying off the squads that they’ve got that they can’t afford.  Fucking ex-Man United dickhead.  Oh yes, it’s the first game he’s lost so of course he has to make every excuse under the sun. It’s ingrained. Fucking idiot.

I said after the last game that we needed to win this one, Preston on Tuesday and Cardiff next Saturday and if we manage that, then we could be right back in it.  Nothing really has changed but if we are looking at the teams we need to catch, then Leeds defeat at home to Blackburn, Leicester’s defeat away to Plymouth and Ipswich not managing to beat Middlesbrough at home, have meant that it’s two game weeks in a row where we have been the only team in the top four to win. Stranger things have happened. It’s also massively funny to see Leeds and Leicester shitting the bed, whatever happens from here on in.

Part 1 of our three part challenge to get seriously in the mix again has been completed.  Part 2 is on Tuesday at home to Preston.  Up the fucking Saints.

FA Cup 4th Round Replay - Southampton 3 Watford 0

 

Sekou Can Fly As Well

The replay no one wanted is here with Watford making a Tuesday night trip down to St Mary’s. Win this tonight and this will be the first of five midweek games in a row, which is a quite mental schedule and will include a 5th round mid-week trip to Anfield.  Whoopee.

Watford manager Valerian Ismail thinks he has the answers and that though Saints will be much changed for today, he knows our system and how to combat it. On the one hand he has a point because they have drawn twice with us this season but on the other hand, both of those games have been at Vicarage Road and this one isn’t.

There was a lot of interest around the team selection for tonight, with the last day of the transfer window meaning that neither Mason Holgate or Charlie Alcaraz are still at the club and they would definitely have been playing tonight. As it was, four players survived from the starting lineup from the weekend in Jan Bednarek, Che Adams, Will Smallbone and somewhat surprisingly, Flynn Downes.  Joe Lumley was given another chance to show the goalkeeping is easier when you use your arms. Shea Charles was deployed out of position at right back with youngster Jayden Meghoma on the left. Captain Jack partnered Janny B at centre back. Midfielder included Joe Rothwell it’s Stuart Armstrong’s usual slot and Che was flanked with Sekou Mara and Tyler Dibling.   Watford looked a little more at full strength that they had in the initial FA Cup meeting and the main thing was that Wesley Hoedt was present and will doubtless have an evening of shit raining down on him from the Northam End.

Away we go and pissing down and Tyler Dibling is the first to show as the Dutch Caleta-Car tries to pass his way out of defence but gives the ball straight to Smallbone. Dibling picks it up and meanders his way past left back Morris before putting it right across the goal with no one running in to finish it off.

The first shot on target comes from another Dutch Callum Davenport mistake, as he virtually scuffs his nose on the pitch stooping really low to head the ball out but it’s returned by Dibling to Downes who slides in but can only half hit it straight at Bachmann.

Watford are catching us with too many midfielders in front of the ball and their first threatening attack sees them pissing through midfield with Downes out of position and Smallbone showing his usual sprint speed to get back in there.   The ball eventually finds its way to Kone, who shoots, deflection off Bednarek down and looping up and Lumley watches with feet planted as it bounces off the top of the bar and over.

The first goal will be important tonight as if we get it, it will give the makeshift team some confidence and mean that we don’t have to empty the bench in order to try and claw the game back like last time.  We build down the left with Mara picking up the ball in lots of space and he gets to the edge of the box, gets his head up well and slides in a lovely ball to Che Adams, six yards out with just the goalkeeper to beat. Guess what happens? Yep, hit the fucking goalkeeper and as he tries to step round the sprawling defenders, the Dutch Mason Holgate gets a foot in and stabs it off for a corner.

The rest of the first half was absolute shite and no more really needs to be said about it. It was just ‘going through the motions’ bullshit and just waiting for half time.  All of our attacks were breaking down on Mara or Adams and it was only Dibling offering any spark in attack.

Second half and still pissing down and Watford break through midfield again and Chakvetadze gets into the box followed by Shea Charles and dives between two players, neither of whom attempt to tackle him and hits the deck. Fucking embarrassing mate and the referee does get it spot it and dishes out a yellow card.

Almost straight away we pick the ball up on the left and Rothwell drives into the penalty area and tries to play a 1-2 Adams but either by luck or by design the ball doesn’t go back to Rothwell and instead it finds Sekou Mara and he uses the swinger of a left foot that he never normally uses and smashes the ball past Bachmann at his near post.  Get in – I can’t believe he's done that!

You Can't Stop Him Like That Mate

Tyler Dibling is really showing up well now and cruises past Morris again on the halfway line and set off towards goal before crashing to the deck. The referee decides that this is also a dive even though there is no logical reason why he would’ve done it, unlike their guy who was in penalty area.  Levelling up.

Unflustered by it, Dibling turns up in the right-back area and knocks it back to Lumley who instead of whacking it up the pitch decides to play and turns the ball to Downes.  He looks like he’s in trouble but spins out of it and via Charles, Dibling takes off again in a big diagonal run and gets 40 yards before being absolutely carted by Thug Porteous as he releases the ball to Adams.  On to Mara, one touch, thunderbastard, goal.  No one expected that – not Mara, not any of the other players, not any of the fans and certainly not Bachmann who saw it flash by him at the near post again.  Having been shit on both of the goals, Bachmann collapses and we have a little break while he gets himself substituted. Just fuck off mate. Watford bring on Ben Hamer in his place.

Sam Edozie is on for Dibling and almost immediately Adams put him through with another clever ball in between the lumbering pair of the Dutch Lyanco and Porteous but all Sam can manage is a back pass.

Che Will Tear You Apart

Watford are not in the mood for Edozie and his tricks and Sierralta carts him up in the air, somersault and everything, rather than try and win the ball.  Will we make him pay? Rothwell fires it over, Watford’s defenders all stop and Adams peels off the static defence to knock it into the empty net from about six yards.

Watford’s performance has tailed off, which is hard to imagine bearing in mind they’ve been shite all game and there are more goals in the offing as Porteous tries to pass out of defence like he’s actually a competent footballer and gives the ball away. One pass and Edozie is clean through coming in from an angle and he tries to give the keeper the eyes which he does successfully, but then he fucks up the finish and hits the inside of the near post and sees it bounce away.

Porteous then tries to do the same thing again and loses the ball this time to Edozie and it bounces to Sam Amo who just has the goalkeeper beat and he manages to knock it over Hamer as he comes out and hits the fucking post as well.

Liverpool here we come and that really couldn’t have been much easier. Let’s draw a veil over the first half which was absolutely shit.  Che Adams missed an absolute sitter when he managed to increase his xHitTheFuckingKeeperFromAnywhere stat. Watford had that one chance which deflected and bounced off the bar.

In the second half however, we stepped it up and Watford didn’t and the goals started to flow through Mara and Adams. Watford just packed in and to be honest we should’ve scored two more but Edozie and Amo-Ameyaw brought our ‘missed sitter’ count for the game to three.  Sam Amo in particular looked gutted with his miss.  It’ll come fella.

The Dutch Holgate Applauds the Fans That Used to ... oh never mind.

To be fair to the Dutch Alan Bennett, he didn’t have the best of games with his passing but he actually looks too good a player to be playing for team that Watford side. Quite a few times he swept the ball out to wide players who couldn’t control it or didn’t look after it and his frustration was obvious.   He kept on losing his shit with his own players whereas when he carted over Sam Amo at the end, he made sure he picked him up.  He certainly deserves better than having to partner Ryan Porteous, who is just a big clumsy park-football thug and should certainly have got two yellow cards over the course of the game.

Whereas in the first game at Watford, none of the fringe players really did anything to make the manager sit up and take notice but that wasn’t the case today. Tyler Dibling was probably the biggest plus and having been somewhat nondescript at Vicarage Road, he certainly turned on the style today and what a style it is, very languid but very effective in the way he dribbles past players and then puts his body in the way so they can’t catch him. It certainly is a very young Le Tissier in the way that he moves and the socks around the ankles certainly add to the persona. He was excellent today.  Jayden Meghoma was another 17 year old who put in a really good shift.  He looked a lot better defensively today as well which will come on leaps and bounds as he gets used to mens football.  A couple of decent players in the making there.

Most headlines will go to Sekou Mara for his two goals. He started the game fairly well for the first 20 minutes or so and then the second part of the first half he didn’t look interested in the slightest and may as well not of been out there. Goals change perception however and they also changed his enthusiasm for the game and having scored one he looked a completely different player and the second goal was a brilliant strike.
 
Che Adams had a somewhat inconsistent game, missing an absolute sitter in the first half but he then got the assist for both of Mara’s goals and then knocked one in himself as he was alive as a free-kick came into the box when no one else was.  Overall, for a 90 minute performance, you take a goal and two assists and he is definitely going to be massively useful to us in the Championship run-in, despite his contract running down.

Joe Rothwell showed a bit more of what he was about despite being on the receiving end of a couple of late tackles, especially the one from that useless late lump of shit that is Porteous.

It was an interesting day for the referee as well as he correctly booked Chakvetadze for his embarrassing dive in our penalty area and then seems to want to even it up by booking Dibling for going down in the middle of the pitch when he had absolutely nothing to gain and had already beaten the player.  Edozie then got booked for one which for a glorious moment, I thought was going to see Porteous get a deserved second yellow card.  I’m not a fan of diving and hate our players doing it but hypocritically, if it gets rid of the opposition shithouse then it’s worth the risk.

Bring on Liverpool. Maybe they will be out of contention for every other competition by this time and it will be the last chance for Klopp to sign off with a bit of silverware. Probably not though and with both teams having ridiculous fixture congestion before and after the fixture and the 5^th Round being scheduled for mid-week, there’s no way either team will be at full strength which is a bit of a shame and shows what are the powers that be think of the FA Cup these days.

Still, we have about five league games before then and it’s much more important to go to Anfield with our unbeaten record still intact and if we do lose at Anfield, so fucking what.

Up the fucking Saints Reserves.

FA Cup 4th Round - Watford 1 Southampton 1

 

His Hair is Fine....

Watford away in the 4^th Round of the FA Cup in one of the most uninspiring draws of all time.  It’s a team we’ve played many times recently in both the Premier League and the Championship and it’s a team in our own division so in short, it’s boring.  I’m suspecting we will see a much changed side even though we had no mid-week game last week, nor do we have one next week. It’s a bit of shame but that’s the way it is.

One player who would’ve been playing today, if he was fit, was Kamari Doyle.  On the face a bit we had a bit of bad news on Wednesday when it emerged that he was leaving the club and joining Brighton. The reason for him leaving was the Jimmy Jay Morgan one of lack of game time.  Cough-Bullshit-Cough!

If we delve beneath that headline a little bit, we will see that Doyle has been injured for the last four months so I don’t know when exactly he was expecting to play or was in any position to make demands in that regard. He was fit at the very start of the season and he was fit at the tail end of last season, so is he leaving because he didn’t get many minutes in the train wreck that was Ruben Sellers as we got relegated ? What are his prospects of getting more minutes for Brighton in the Premier League than he would get for Saints in the Championship and cup games?  Is it a Premier League thing?  Maybe stick around for a few months and and back yourself and team-mates to get back there.   Maybe it was assurances of game time that he was after? It’s such bullshit isn’t it because laughably, as opposed to that, Doyle has been put in their Under-21 squad, which I guess he knew about when he signed and he probably won’t even be training with the first team, for fuck‘s sake.

It’s always disappointing when someone decides to jump ship but how exactly is Jimmy Jay Morgan getting at that pathway express that is Chelsea?  Nothing plausible in that lot, so that kind of leaves us with good old cash as the reason.   For what it’s worth, I’ve only seen Doyle play a couple of times and he didn’t particularly make an impression and looked miles away from regularly challenging for a first team place. Good luck to him but I think we’ve done alright with the £3 million-ish fee.  Careful what you wish for. (UPDATE: Somewhat spookily, Russell Martin confirmed virtually every word of this when asked about Doyle's move)

Kamari, Modelling the Brighton U21 kit

Moving on and we are of course getting towards the end of the silly season and the transfer window and the rumour has been about KWP moving to Arsenal. There’s no actual quotes or any actual information in any of these reports but Arsenal is the very worst club but one of your players can be linked with because social media for your club will be completely and utterly poisoned until the story goes away, such is the average Arsenal fans keyboard warrior enthusiasm.

To today and the team – just the 9 changes with only Che Adams and THB remaining from the last league game.  Holgate right back, Captain Jack centre back and Jayden Meghoma at left back.  A worrying looking midfield of Charles, Rothwell and Alcaraz and Che being flanked up front by Tyler Dibling and Sekou Mara.  All I know about Watford’s line up is that Wesley Hoedt is playing.

We start the game pretty well and despite all the changes and settle nicely into the pattern of keeping the ball and probing.  However, Watford‘s first break is down our right and over there we have Mason Holgate who is dozing after three minutes and Holgate somewhat clumsily carts over Asprilla on the left-hand corner of the penalty area.   He may well have got a bit of the ball there but it looks clumsy and Michael Salisbury, who is always shit, deems it worth a booking.  Lumley just has Tyler Dibling as his one-man wall and two seconds later he’s looking rather stupid as the freekick is smashed by Martins, low at the near post and Lumley does a possible impression of someone doing the ‘salmon’ in wriggling across his goal without using his hands and ball nestles in the net.  What the fuck was that? The only possible thing I can think of is that Lumley thought it was going wide because it almost look like he pulled his hands away but zero arms goalkeeping is never going to catch on, or catch anything.

Proof That Joe Lumley Has Arms

Saints try and get back into it but every time the ball goes up to Adams, he has the shit kicked out of him by either Hoedt or Pollock.  The latter absolutely trashes through the back of him, which is twice as bad as Holgate’s tackle but it’s not a yellow card this time because, as I may have mentioned, Michael Salisbury is shit.  We are now looking very rattled having conceded the early goal and it’s mainly Watford instigating any action in the penalty areas. A corner from the left is meant by the completely unmarked big bloke with a ponytail who is not Hoedt, and he heads well wide but we are living dangerously here.

It gets no better though as Watford, prompted by the mercurial Hoedt at centre back, spread the ball out to our left and Martins nicely weighted pass picks out the run of Asprilla but THB has gone with him and slides it superbly to prevent the shot coming in. That’s one of our two regular first team as ladies and gentlemen.

We haven’t got a midfield – Shea Charles is doing his bit but has no help from Alcaraz who is constantly giving the ball away and Rothwell, who can’t run, can’t tackle and it’s a bit of mystery what he’s about to be honest.

THB doesn’t have a great moment as he puts a totally free header over the bar from a corner and then he has a shocker on his own penalty area on the next attack as he intercepts the ball into the box but can only present the ball to Bayo, who takes a touch before drilling it across at the far corner but it goes just wide.  Luckily, Lumley didn’t need his arms for that one.

Half-time and we have basically been fucking dreadful. When you have five players out of eleven dropping 2 out of 10 performances, then there is absolutely no way that you are going to put together any sort of coherent performance. Holgate has been fucking embarrassing, as has Rothwell. Alcaraz has clearly forgotten what colour kit he is playing in and then we have the fish brothers – Sekou Mara who is a fish up a tree and Joe Lumley, who dived across the goal like a fish, because a fish has no arms.  I feel a bit sorry for Dibling out on the right,  because he’s relying on his fellow right-sided players, Holgate and Rothwell to link up with him.

No changes at half-time when to be honest, there could’ve been five, and Saints don’t particularly get any better. A corner from the left is headed out but bounces off of Meghoma, back into the danger zone and Martins has a shot which deflects and Lumley can’t get near it as it bounces off the post. We really should be 3-0 down by this point.

63 minutes and it’s substitution time now and here come some proper players with Stuart Armstrong, Ryan Fraser, Will Smallbone and Adam Armstrong all entering the fray. Off go Joe Rothwell, Shea Charles, Che Adams and Tyler Dibling.  Oh look, we’re much better and another fifteen minutes go by before it’s time to throw the sink at it and Sam Amo is on for Jayden Maghoma and so we are going three at the back, Smallbone in midfield and everyone else going for it.

Stuart Armstrong looks in the mood right from his introduction and he bursts away from two players down the left before crossing to the back post which is cleared as far as Holgate of all people, who comes steaming in and brings a half decent save out of Bachmann.

Holgate is playing like a man possessed now, bursting forward and playing like a proper full back and from his next excursion to the edge of the box he goes Full-KWP and tries to jink past a couple of players before being trashed.  For some reason, we allow Alcaraz to take the free kick and we may as well go back to halfway and wait for the goal kick which inevitably follows after he shats it over the bar.

The direction of travel of this game has completely changed round now but we’re running out of time as we reach 90 as Watford get deeper and Saints just pile on the attack. Sekou Mara, now playing in his favoured centre forward position, picks up a ball on the right and decides to make his first contribution of the game by smashing it goalwards and Bachmann pushes it out of the edge of the penalty area.  In comes Stuart Armstrong, checks inside one player and with everyone expecting him to curl it with the inside of his foot towards the far post he reverses it back to the near post and Bachmann has taken a step the wrong way and is therefore completely fucked, as it rips into the net.

There is only one team that looks to win it in the five minutes that remain and we win a corner on the right which is crossed in to the mixer and THB gets up and it’s just inside the post but unfortunately, Bachmann decides to use his arm in very un-Fish like manner and pushes it wide of the post.  The End.

At the end of the day, a draw was the result no one wanted but it was a fair result. Watford should’ve been more than one goal in front at half-time, whereas was we were by far the better team in the last half an hour, especially when we brought on some of the proper players.

That first half was an absolute shit show in general terms where half of the team as individuals were absolutely shit. Of the five mentioned earlier, at least Lumley, Holgate and Alcaraz improved.  Mara had one of those games where you just want to pack him back off to France as soon as possible, taking whatever haircut is necessary on the £10 million that we paid for him. There is no way that any striker in our Under-18s upwards could be as bad as him.  Mara is terrible in the wide areas and he’s not strong enough to play in the centre forward position. He stands at roughly six foot, so he’s not small but the way he plays, it looks like he weighs about six stone – breathe on him and he falls over.

Sekou Having Lost the Ball Again, Having Been Breathed on By a Smaller Player

Mason Holgate in the second half was an absolute beast and was probably our best player and that sums him up. He’s like Ainsley Maitland-Niles in that he is eminently capable of reaching a very high level but he can’t do it consistently. Last year, I had this thing about the lack of people in our squad who could string together three decent games in a row. This is Holgate and this is why his career has not gone anywhere up till now, he just can’t do it consistently and you end up being amazed when he hits a high-level and not surprised when he does the opposite. The boy can play but he’s got a find a consistent level somewhere between the ‘beast’ that he was in the second half and the ‘dogshit’ that he was in the first.

The five subs all made good contributions and upped the energy level. The goal in the end came from the one decent thing that Mara did all game when his shot was parried away by Bachmann and Stuart Armstrong’s finish from the edge of the box, reversing it into the near post, was absolutely brilliant.

So overall it was a bit of a strange game with no one who is not in the regular Championship starting XI, giving any cause to convince the manager to think that they should be. Jack Stephens was ok at centre back but we already know but he’s not good enough to challenge the two incumbents. Mason Holgate had a good half as said earlier but the likes of Joe Rothwell, Sekou Mara and Charly Alcaraz really didn’t do enough.

I’ve seen it said that with the system and the style of play bedded in now, that players should be able to swap into it seamlessly but that’s simply not true.  A number of these players are reserve players for a reason and you can maybe slot in two or three and if not weaken the team at all but if you slot in eight or nine, then there is an inevitable drop off

No doubt those who didn’t set  the world alight today, will be given another chance in the replay and be responsible for us trying to secure a thankless trip to Anfield in the 5^th Round.  It will be a chance to mess up Jurgen Klopp’s retirement party I guess.

The draw today is good for one thing in that it extended the undefeated run. If we get beat up at Anfield then no worries but I feel it was quite important to not get beat today, even with a weakened side.  Bring on Rotherham away at the weekend and a mission to avenge the ridiculous dropped two points at St Mary’s.

Up the Fucking Saints.

EFL Championship Match 20 - Watford 1 Southampton 1

 

Is the Big Dog Back?

Today we make the trip to Vicarage Road to play Watford who are in their second season in the Championship and are on their 300th manager (approximately). The list of Watford managers page on Wikipedia is now officially the largest page on the internet (allegedly). I wonder how many managers that they’ve sacked, they’re still paying.

Mind you, Saints can look away when that accusation gets thrown around because I’m pretty sure we are still paying Ralph Hasenhuttl and Nathan Jones who have been happily not working since they left us in the past year or so. At least we had the sense to only give Ruben Selles a contract until the end of the season.

Since the Pozzo era started at Watford, only one manager has lasted longer than a year and that was Javi Gracia about four years ago. Before him, the last manager who lasted a year was Sean Dyche over 10 years ago and very few people can even remember him being manager of Watford.  The current incumbent is Valerian Ismael, who I vaguely remember being manager of West Brom briefly. He is fully in line with the Watford approach having been manager of a Cypriot club for one game before getting sacked over a clash with the club hierarchy.

However, this approach of constantly looking for a new manager bounce, has served Watford pretty well over the past 10 years with trips to Wembley and a decent run of seasons in the Premier League before it all unravelled 18 months ago. Now they are in a situation where they have Wesley Hoedt playing at centre back.

Wesley hit the news last week with a goal from 45 yards, drawing back that magnificent left foot of his and pinging it over the goalkeeper from the halfway line. To be fair, it was a brilliant goal and he one hundred percent meant it. Hoedt was of course signed to be our long-term replacement for Virgil van Dijk in 2017/18, a season saw some of the greatest transfer window activity in Southampton FC history with the arrival of Hoedt, Mario Lemina and Guido Carrillo who combined and succeeded only in draining the wage bill for the next four years.

Hoedt has all the physical attributes you need in that he’s decent in the air has a great left foot on him and he has that little nasty streak that top players needs. However, Wesley had a problem in that he thought he was miles better than he actually was and we have to play on that today. He’s 29 now so we might have grown out of it but the indications are that he hasn’t. Wesley has an ego and he will want to prove to the Saints travelling fans just how brilliant he is. There is a high chance that there will be a mistake similar to the one he made in his last ever game for Saints went at Craven Cottage he tried to dribble out of his own corner, lost the ball and lost us the game.

Wesley - Shortly Before He Never Played For Us Again

Other notable Watford players include Jake Livermore who bizarrely, won a few England caps a few years ago but this year in the Championship, since he returned from injury, he has been earning rave reviews. Watford are on a run of only one defeat in nine games and that was against Leicester. Having made a dismal start they are now sitting in mid-table and will be looking at a run to the playoff positions but similar to other mid-table clubs, we should be too good for them if we play properly for the whole 90 minutes.

It’s been a slow news week at St Mary‘s with no major squad news to report so I thought of turned two recent trips to Watford which included a goal in seven seconds by Shane Long, Abdoulaye Doucoure punching in a goal to equalise in the last minute, a brilliant goal by Che Adams on our last visit and John Barnes singing Elton John songs on the pitch at half-time, which was truly one of the more bizarre episodes of recent times.

Team news and Flynn Downes isn;t here and is replaced int he starting XI with Joe Aribo, giving us a midfield three of Shea Charles, Stu Armstrong and Aribo.  That's a bit of a worry I have to say.  Hoedt starts for Watford and not only that, he's captain. 

Away we go and from the outset it looks like it’s going to be a decent game with both teams looking to get on the ball and pass it but there’s nothing much happening in either penalty area. Wesley looks magnificent however in his captains armband because he’s always set such a great example, model pro and all that.

Watford win a free kick to the side of the penalty area has Stuart Armstrong somewhat carelessly carts someone over and it’s fired in by Sema and Bass has a bit of a flap at it before a Watford player hooks it onto the post and away but the ref has spotted an infringement of some sort so happy days. Wesley has his head in his hands.

Saints are getting caught out a little bit on occasions in midfield and Shea Charles shows that he’s lost none of the cynicism that they teach you at Manchester City by clipping Kone’s ankles and giving the referee the easiest yellow card decision that he’ll ever have. From the resulting free-kick, delivered by Sema, the big donkey centre-forward should really get a touch at the back post but he can’t get his feet sorted out and it runs off for a goal-kick. Wesley throws his arms about as all captains shouldn’t.

Saints have created absolutely nothing so far but that changes as Aribo has a dart down the right hand side and bundles his way past two defenders and along the goal line before winning a corner.  In it comes from Manning from the right, knocked back into the mixer by Bednarek and Adam Armstrong tries a back heel flick which sends the ball narrowly over the bar.

That’s it for us as an attacking force before half time but Watford build up superbly from the back and suddenly we are struggling as Sema gets put through behind KWP and with just Baz to beat, drills it straight at him and it hits Baz on the chest and bounces away.  Great save.

And that’s half-time and quite frankly we’ve been a bit shit. Lots of nice possession but practically no sight of the opposition goalkeeper, whereas Watford are forced Baz into action on a couple of occasions and have looked dangerous from set pieces. Some of our players just haven’t turned up. Alcaraz has been a constant possession recycling machine for Watford and looks like he just doesn’t fancy it.  One player who has turned up is Jan Bednarek who has been excellent at snuffing out threats before they happen with excellent reading of the game. I'm having thoughts about a point maybe being a decent return from this game.

Russell Martin clearly agrees with me regarding Alcaraz and Charly doesn’t emerge for the second half and it’s replaced by Ryan Fraser which moves Che into the middle and away from his left wing position where he is absolutely terrible.

Wee Man Fraser is immediately involved as he fights off the full back to pick up THB’s long diagonal and Fraser holds the ball in the corner before knocking it back to Stuart Armstrong who plays a cute ball inside the fall back and Che Adams hits it first time lash with his left foot and it goes across the goal and narrowly wide. The key thing here is that we actually looked dangerous.

Back at the other end and more Watford pressure and we allow two crosses into the box, one from Sema which is cleared and Watford work it back out to Lewis on the left and he digs out a cross which is headed clear and Asprilla volleys it goes down into the bottom corner and Baz takes off to make an absolutely outstanding save to his right.

Baz is having a good day so far but he nearly gets caught in possession as he takes a Manning back pass but he drinks his way round the big Donkey centre forward and gets the ball to THB. THB picks out a low diagonal to Stuart Armstrong and we’re away with Stu running with the ball before releasing Fraser in a good crossing position and he chips the cross to the back post where Adam Armstrong nods down and Che cushions away from the defender with his first touch and drives into the middle of the goal, through the last-ditch dives by Wesley and the goalkeeper. Brilliant goal.

What have Watford got? Well, not a lot with Adam Armstrong winning the ball in defence and driving forwards, finding Fraser on the left, who lashes it and Hamer makes a bit of a meal of it but managed to shovel it over the bar.  We are really controlling the game quite nicely until Charles gives a tired looking pass away on the halfway line which results in Kone getting played in and having a shot which is blocked by THB.

Substitution time and Mara is warmed up and ready.  Even before I’ve seen who is coming off I’m not sure about this and even more so when it’s Che’s number that goes up.  He’s having his best half-a game of the season in the second half and holding the ball up well and letting Wesley know that he’s not all that. The shithouse games are starting as well as Saints put the ball out to allow Manning to receive some treatment and Watford respond by not giving us the ball back.  I wonder if it was on orders of the captain, who has got increasingly ragged as the game has gone on, trying to hit Hollywood passes and just giving us throw-ins.  This is of course in response to being rattled by the continual abuse coming down from the Saints end of the ground….because he is and always was a bell-end.  Another cross in the box and Watford substitute Tom Ince gets on the end of it and shoots straight at Baz.

Elaborate Time Wasting Gamesmanship Ahoy!

Stu Taking As Long as He Needs to Get Off the Pitch

As we approach the 90 and with us looking a little bit tired, Stuart Armstrong and Joe Aribo are replaced by Smallbone and Bree and we seem to have gone to a 4-4-2 with KWP on the right of midfield.  The clock ticks by and we get to the 98th minute and Watford centre-back Porteous just clubs the ball up the pitch and THB doesn’t win the header and it drops down and Watford sub Healy scuffs a shot which goes straight through Baz and ends up in the net. Fucks sake.

Well fuck off. What an absolutely shit goal to concede to throw away two points.  Thought I'd have been happy with a point at half time, this is a proper kick in the bollocks. We were absolutely comfortable and Watford didn’t look like they were ever going to score but then a simple straight long ball and a combination of a defender making a bad decision and the goalkeeper making a mistake and two points go down the drain.

In a good run that we’ve been on, both of the centre backs have judged really well when it's time to not head the ball, but leave it to run through to the goalkeeper or leave it and pick it up themselves but THB has had an absolute shocker there as he almost seemed a duck under the long ball which allowed the Watford player to get a touch. Even with that one mistake, we would’ve got away with it had Baz not shown his achilles heel again with the low shot to his left going under his wrists. If THB doesn’t make mistake, the second mistake doesn’t happen but the combination of both means that you don’t get away with it.  It is such a shit park-football goal. It isn’t even a particularly good ball forward just a straight clump up the middle and the shot at the end is bollocks as well.  It must be so gutting to have worked so hard and played pretty well for 98 minutes, only to fuck it like that with 30 seconds to go.

So we made a mistake and dropped a couple of points but that’s not the only story here. Leicester, Leeds and Ipswich – the thre teams we are trying to catch – were four, two and two goals to the good as the clock reached 90 in their respective games.  So they were comfortable as they’d scored a second and therefore not susceptible to the late goal conceded like we were. Until we start scoring more goals, then we are always going to be in danger of this sort of thing happening. It was a great goal today by Che Adams, who took it really well after a superb build-up but as usual, I’m asking myself how many other times we made the goalkeeper work. I remember he save one from Ryan Fraser and there was one straight down his throat from Stuart Armstrong but that’s about it.

It was impossible to disagree with anything Russell Martin said about the game afterwards – we needed the second goal, we played really well and defended really well up to that point, we’ve made two mistakes and it’s a really bad goal to concede. One important thing that he said was that it was important not to batter the players because the two in question have been very good for a number of weeks.  Baz in particular has improved so much and until the last minute today, was comfortably our best player.

A positive from today was the form of Che Adams int he second half and the fact that he scored what was a very good goal.  Che has always been a streak player so after nothing in ages, the hope must be that he bags goals in a run of games now and gets that Big Dog mentality back.  Like Adam Armstrong, he's proved before that he can do it in this division and now he has to prove that he can do it again on a regular basis.  Joe Aribo did ok in midfield and worked hard throughout and at least wasn't a liability.  I still think though that using him a replacement for Stuart Armstrong when tired / injured, is probably how Joe will end up being used.

The mad Championship schedule gives us another chance to make up for today’s disappointment in just a few days time, as we take on Coventry City who have just had the gift of a win from playing Wayne Rooney‘s Birmingham. So, their tails will be up and our challenge on Wednesday is to slap them back down again. Up the fucking Saints.