On Saturday morning the official Saints website carried the news that we had signed Jason Puncheon from Plymouth who was on loan at the Fake Dons. This is the player that I picked out as being in good player in the JPT Final 1st Leg report a week or so ago. Aren’t I clever? It looks a good signing for another reason as well in that he now of course, won’t be playing against us in the 2nd leg.
When inside SMS, the talk was of who had and who hadn’t got their tickets for the Skates match. I got mine in the morning and here’s a transcript of the last few seconds of my conversation with Barbie in the ticket office.
Me: What happens if the game isn’t played ?
Barbie: I don’t know.
Me: you know, if Portsmouth go bust before the game and can’t fulfil the fixture
Barbie: I don’t know
Me: Would I get a refund ?
Barbie: I don’t know
Me: What’s the next number after 3
Barbie: I don’t know
Me: How far would you let me go on a first date ?
Barbie: I don’t know
One bloke was saying in the ground that if the Skates were out, Sunderland (lost to Skates in 4th Round) would be reinstated... can't see that one myself as Coventry (lost to Skates in 3rd Round) would want to be reinstated as well.
Anyhow, the Saints line-up for today was notable for a few things. The first is that we had our ‘League’ defence in place, the one with Otsemobor, Fonte, Seabourne and Mills in it. The ‘Cups’ defence of Thomas, Jaidi, Perry and Harding was on the bench. Lallana was missing presumed rested so Antonio and Holmes were on the wings with Wottinho and Schneiderlin in the centre. Barnard was up front with Sir Rickie.
The first half an hour of the game passed by in a blur of absolutely nothing. Nothing from Saints and even less from Stockport who were living up to their league position of bottom by miles. They had five across midfield and a midget up front who barely touched the ball. Fonte and Seabourne must have been worried about being outjumped by the 5ft 4 towering presence in front of them. Both of the goalkeepers were providing light relief to keep us all entertained. Kelvin Davis’ first touch was on good form today as he gave the chasing forward every chance of getting the ball before he cleared it on a couple of occasions. Meanwhile, Owain Fon Williams (Do you think he may be Welsh with a name like that?) was scuffing kicks along the ground and falling on his arse every time the ball went near him.
Joseph Mills had started well and I noted this fact at the time and gave this opinion out to a few people sat near me. Kiss of Death. From that moment on it was like the ghost of Lee Todd had come down a possessed him. He was shocking. It all started with him being undecided as to whether to trap a ball before it bounced or wait for it. In the end he did neither and both, stop, start, stop, start, missed it. The ghost of Lee Todd was exorcised but unfortunately, it was replaced by the ghost of Francis Benali as a succession of passes forward skewed off his boot into the Kingsland. Then there was the free kick he took that sailed a good ten yards over the head of everyone and out for a goal kick. There is a one footed Heather Mills gag to put in here somewhere… answers on a postcard please. Lee Holmes was not helping him out at all on the left and he looked absolutely knackered after about 20 minutes, all red faced and puffing. Very strange.
In contrast, The three new defenders were all looking good. Fonte is obviously a class apart though he does tend to be all arms and legs when he jumps so will give away a fair few free kicks but I was more impressed than I thought I’d be by Seabourne who though relatively untested defensively, was strong in the air and hit some good passes into the feet of Lambert and Barnard.
It was 25 minutes before we managed a shot as the ball broke to he has never scored, Morgan Schneiderlin and true to form, he didn’t though his rasping shot from 25 yards was well hit but unfortunately, straight at the keeper. On 42 minutes we really should have taken the lead as a long throw from Antonio was flicked on by Sir Rickie to Barnard six yards out who powered a header straight at the keeper. There were signs that we were finally getting it together as the half drew to a close and Wottinho hit almost a carbon copy of Schneiderlin’s earlier effort, straight at the keeper… ho hum.
The first half had been mainly crap… and it was 0-0.
The single cell organism that sits behind me in the Kingsland was debating with himself at half time whether Jose was pronounced ‘Ho-zay’ or ‘Joe-zay’. He used the Mourinho argument and informed anyone who couldn’t get far enough away, that as Jose is Portuguese, the latter is correct. He then ruined this piece of insight by pronouncing Fonte, ‘Fan-ta’ .
In an unexpected show of sportsmanship, Saints played the first 15 minutes of the second half with 10 men and nothing was happening still. We were trying to play with a bit more urgency but it wasn’t happening for us until a fine cross by Otsemobor was again, headed straight at the keeper by Barnard who was beginning to look a bit frustrated with not scoring. Michail Antonio was then possessed by the ghost of Chicken George as he ran at the left back, beat him, got to the line and fell on his arse as the ball sailed into the Chapel End.
The course of the game was changed by two things. Firstly on 62 minutes, Pards replaced Barnard with Papa Waigo. Secondly, Schneiderlin decided that he would make it 11v11 again by actually touching the ball. Within seconds we were ahead as a Mills corner was punched by the Welsh keeper, straight onto Sir Rickie’s back, from which it bounced over the line. 1-0, scrappy goal, who cares. Rickie's brilliant with his back to goal.
It was then a different game with Schneiderlin and Holmes tearing up the left from where Homes actually beat a man and delivered a great cross which Waigo headed over. Waigo had given us some pace up front and he soon beat the offside trap (yes he did!) but was thwarted by the onrushing Fon Williams. We were to see the dance though as Otsemobor again put in a good cross from the right which Waigo controlled before confidently scoring to make it 2-0.
Antonio had a blast at the near post after a mazy run that was beaten away by the keeper and the last 5 minutes were played out mainly in our half as Stockport mounted a bit of token pressure.
In summary, it was a comfortable win against shocking opposition who are bottom of the league for a reason. I really can’t see that team beating anyone in League 2 next season either. As for Saints, well the first half was terrible and Pards admitted that afterwards but encouragingly, he knew what to do to change it round. Papa Waigo was the difference with his pace and ability to run in behind the defence as the Lambo-Barnard partnership needs work to gel properly as they are very similar in terms of pace.
I feel that Pards not picking what he thinks is his strongest side in matches at the moment and is mixing and matching to give some an extended rest. Harding for example would be in the best XI but has been benched for the last 4 games. I’m also guessing that Jaidi would be in 90% of fans starting line ups, including mine. The midfield was an issue today and I feel that Hammond is badly missed as he offers a bit of steel and a goal threat as well as leadership. It’ll be interesting to see how Puncheon fits into the scheme of things when his time comes. I felt there were decent performances today from Otsemobor, Fonte, Seabourne and Wottinho and a bit of a mixed bag from the rest.
Next up, Exeter away on Saturday and still 13 points off the playoffs.
Yet another excellent summary - it's marginally better than actually being there, I think ;-)
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