Premier League Match 17 - Fulham 0 Southampton 0

 

Please Stay Fit Rambo

Ivan Juric was announced as the new Saints manager just after the Carabao Cup defeat to Liverpool, meaning that I guess it will be some sort of combination between him and Simon Rusk to put the team on the field today against Fulham.  In Juric’s first interview, he spoke of wanting to play aggressive, pressing football but I wonder how aware he is of the players he has got, to try and play this way. For example, if he is expecting his central midfielders to run non-stop for 90 minutes then Adam Lallana and Joe Aribo, not to mention Will Smallbone, might as well retire.  There is a video kicking around of when Juric was the manager at Torino and the Sporting Director and him had a handbags session in the car park.  No one asked him if he would fancy doing a few car park rounds with Rasmus Ankersen, which was a disappointment.  What that video tells you is that Ivan is probably a little bit of a mad bastard, which is why he took the job.  I don’t think he’s going to be the sort to put up with any crap.

Every new manager comes in with words that sound encouraging and because you are usually at a pretty low ebb when you change manager, it all sounds great. I have learned that actions speak a lot louder than words. One thing that Juric has said though is that we need to get points on the board before New Year, to give us any chance whatsoever of staying in the division. He has signed an 18-month contract but trust me, if he pulls this off, there are always other, richer clubs in need of a miracle worker. First observations are that it sounds that the style of football he is hoping to get us to play will be more Ralph than Russell.

Fulham are now a club that we aspire to be like, in that they got promoted out of the Championship relatively recently but have established themselves in the Premier League and are not even mentioned as potential relegation candidates these days. Marco Silva has got them playing some decent football and they have an experienced, solid Premier League team.  They are capable of dropping in the odd shite performance however and we need to hope for one today. Raul Jiminez has scored a decent number of goals for them this season and he is well supported by Alex Iwobi, who has also chipped in. He’s usually a substitute but we are going to have to deal with the beast that is Adama Traore, when he eventually makes his entrance onto the pitch and he is one who has of course always caused us trouble in the past.

Juric’s go to formation is kind of a 3-4-2-1 and that looks like what we’ve picked today but it’s disappointing for me to see Adam Armstrong in the starting lineup as he has been shit for months and just isn’t up to it. This seems especially strange given that Archer and Tall Paul had decent impact against Liverpool.  The other concern is that Joe Aribo is in midfield and his lack of running and defensive nous will probably be a problem today. The good news is that Aaron Ramsdale is back and the other talking point is that the hot potato that is the captains armband has been passed to Jan Bednarek.  I think that he’s the 6^th on-field captain this season, after Stephens, Downes, Armstrong, McCarthy and THB.

You, Car Park, Now!!!

Ivan hasn’t got a work permit, but he’s here anyway, and takes his place in the crowd as the game starts. Fulham have rested a couple of players as everyone seems to do it against us, so they’re not really creating much and we are certainly not in the mood to cause our own problems and are very safety first at the back. However, Tyler Dibling dribbles across the pitch about 35 yards out and gives the ball away and from the left-hand corner of the penalty area, Iwobi floats over a cross and Ramsdale is suddenly very concerned about it and gets airborne to tip it wide of the far post.

Downes ball in to Dibling is intercepted with the Saints man on its heels and that leads to an effort by Harry Wilson to try and win Goal of the Season as a cross from the left from Robinson is headed away by THB to the edge of the box and Wilson takes it on his thigh before volleying it quite a way over the bar.  The Fulham left is causing us the majority the problems through Iwobi and Robinson and the former takes a pass from the latter and tries to float one into the top corner, but it’s well wide.

As we approach half-time, referee Robinson then makes himself look completely and utterly incompetent as Downes put in a hard-but-fair tackle on 17-year-old debutant King and he waves play on and then two minutes later he puts in an identical challenge on Cairney, takes the ball cleanly and the referee not only gives a free kick which was ridiculous enough, he then books him.

Half time and we’ve been pretty solid to be fair, without creating a thing at the other end of the pitch but we were 5-0 down at this stage in our last league game, so I’ll take it.  Tyler Dibling being replaced by Cameron Archer at half time which is no surprise as Tyler has really struggled to get into the game today.

A little bit of Russ-ball breaks out as Downes and THB work the ball to Archer in the centre circle and he plays it through the gap to send out Armstrong scampering away. He is miraculously not offside, swaps passes with Sugawara and unfortunately, it’s a virtual back pass to the goalkeeper but at least we’ve had a shot on target, which is a fact that is loudly serenaded by the travelling fans.

Anonymous Aribo is replaced by “Back from the Dead” Lesley Ugochukwu and Fulham bring on the massive unit that is Adama Traore.  Traore gets a cross in straight away but Iwobi can only plop the header into the waiting hands of Ramsdale.

There is a moment to shite yourself as a Fulham corner he’s headed out by Bednarek to the right where it’s picked up by the walking supplement bottle, and his left footed cross is met on the bounce on the corner of the 6 yard box by Harry Wilson, who blasts it and Ramsdale flings up an arm to tip it over the bar.  Really good save that.

Big Les is putting himself about strongly and seems to be defensively switched on as well as a ball comes flashing across the top of the penalty area and he smashed goalwards by Jimenez and Les is there to throw himself in the way.

Our manager Rusk Juric brings on James Bree in place of Sugawara, which is a sure sign that we are settling for a point. On the other side, KWP has a bit of a nightmare under a high ball and presents it straight to Traore, who runs at the penalty area, gets a lucky bounce back off a Bednarek tackle and then drills it narrowly wide with his left foot. Fuck me that was close.

Yep, That Was Close

90 minutes are up and Tall Paul is on. KWP does a bit of defending out on the left and then turns and runs down the wing leaving Fulham players in his wake. Castagne is clearly getting worried as he gets towards the penalty area and dives in, gets a bit of the ball but it’s untidy and KWP goes over and ends up in the penalty area. Referee Robinson is of course not interested and we’re off to Stockley Park.

“Hello Stockley Park…. I said hello… anyone there”

[Silence]

[Muffled voices in the background] – “turn that bastard answering machine on”

[Answer phone message] – “Hi there, this is Stockley Park, we’re not here right now as 90 minutes are up and nothing has happened in this game.  If in doubt, go with the referee’s decision as we’re all out on the PGMOL Christmas Piss-Up.  Big Mikey D’s dealer has tipped up and we’re getting right on it.  For acknowledgements of mistakes and apologies, please contact Howard Webb at howard.webb@pgmol-manchesterunited.co.uk...... Leave a message [Beeeeeep]”

We get a corner out of it anyway, and Fernandes swings in and Big Les rises at the back post but it slides off his head and goes out for a throw.

And that’s the end.  Marco Silva looks distraught, and the Fulham players get booed by their fans. A few weeks ago we had Brighton fans suddenly becoming entitled because they are in the top half of the league and failed to beat us, and now Fulham proving that they are no different. Stay humble people.

First things first - that was a decent point today, down to a clean sheet from a dogged defensive effort.  Aaron Ramsdale being back made a huge difference, even though he was playing in a modified goalkeeper glove because two of his fingers were strapped together. With him in goal, the defence actually looked like a unit that the opposition are going have to work hard to get past.  All three of the central defenders put in a good shift to deny Fulham many real chances – Janny B lead from the front by example and THB and Woody were pretty solid and most importantly, as a unit they were solid.  It was only when that totally natural athlete Adama Traoré came on in the second half that they gave us any problems at all.  Rumours that he broke the wishbone on the Christmas turkey one year and wished that he could suddenly transform to being fucking huge and end up looking like a cross between a boxer and an Olympic sprinter, might well be true.

Ryan Manning was unlucky to be dropped but KWP did a solid job down the left and Sugawara on the right didn’t have any defensive nightmares either and he was put under more pressure as most of Fulham‘s play went down that side with the impressive Robinson and Iwobi.  It is also amusing that Marco Silva thought he could rest players against us and for it to go wrong for him. Serves the arrogant bastard right.  It was so sad to see him getting more and more animated and more and more miserable looking at the same time as the second half ticked by.

I was looking today for changes and insights into what we might expect going forward with Ivan Juric who obviously had a hand in things that went on today. One thing straight off the bat was Jan Bednarek as captain and Janny had a tremendous game, and the role of captain seemed to elevate him, unlike the most recent incumbents who it seems to have just weighed down.  When I was thinking about what lineup Ivan might put together when he has his feet under the table, I never even considered big Lesley Ugochukwu as an option and had almost forgotten about him until he came on as a substitute today and put in the kind of performance that I was quite frankly expecting from him when he joined at the start of the season. Pace, power, tackling and generally adding a physical presence. If we can get the best out of him then it certainly would help, and a partnership in the centre of midfield of him and Flynn Downes looks promising.  So – Ramsdale, Wood, Bednarek, THB, KWP, Sugawara, Downes, Big Les…. That’s the goalkeeper and the 3-4 part of the 3-4-2-1 sorted out.

Big Les Back From The Dead

Up front – not much.  Matty Fernandes had quite a lot of defensive responsibility in that he was obviously detailed to get to Sander Berge when we didn’t have the ball to stop Fulham playing out from the back.  Consequently, he wasn’t as effective in an attacking sense as we’d want him to be.  It was no surprise when Tyler Dibling went off at half time as he had struggled to get into the game in the opening 45 minutes but when he went off, so did all of our creativity.  Cam Archer had no impact at all when he came on and Adam Armstrong basically got caught offside a few times and barely touched the ball.  He worked hard but there’s no quality there as we all know. If we are going to play more direct, which it looks like we will, then there is only one option to play upfront, and we all know who that is.

We really didn’t show much in attack today, aside from a little flurry of corners at the end and a burst into the box by KWP which was halted by a strange tackle by Castagne, who won the ball initially but then caught KWP’s trailing leg with his follow-through. We have learnt this season from VAR that, we don’t get those and I don’t think it was even reviewed anyway.

A word today for the referee, Mr. Jim Robinson who was absolutely fucking useless. Downes wins two tackles 100% cleanly within a couple of minutes of each other in the first half and gets booked Flynn for I assume, professionally stopping an attack by winning the ball.  Not long after, he allowed Fulham debutant King, and Berge to tug back Saints players as they went past them with no thought of giving a booking.  We had Fulham under a bit of sustained pressure in the second half, winning a couple of corners but of course he killed the the momentum by stopping the game so Castagne could get up after being felled by next to nothing in a challenge with KWP.  Later on, when Bassey’s flailing arm smacked Fernandes in the mouth, he let it carry on until the ball went dead.  I had a feeling today that even if we had managed to score, he would’ve disallowed it so 0-0 was probably the best we were ever going to get.

So overall, something to build on and it’s another moment in the season where we need to take a positive and win the next game which is at home to West Ham on Boxing Day. It will be Ivan’s first game in charge, as long as he hasn’t twatted one of Sport Republic in the car park between now and then.

Up the fucking Ivan’s Glorious Basterds.