Ralph Checking Out Players Who Won't Be Here Next Season
It’s time for the longest away trip of the season as we head
to Newcastle United, scene of a very important turning point last season. We
were so abysmally fucking terrible - and
I mean worse than any of the other abysmally fucking terrible performance Saints
put in under Pellegrino - that the self styled ‘Useless One’ actually got fired
straight afterwards. After this of course, Mark Hughes kept us up and if that hadn’t
happened, we wouldn’t have Ralph as a manager now and be going there today, almost
safe from relegation for another season.
There was a minor delay in us being safe from relegation during the week when Brighton managed to continue their free-fall towards the Championship by losing at home to Cardiff which means that we are only five points ahead of the Welsh Dead Player Transfer Fee Dodgers. Both Brighton and Cardiff have horrific fixtures to come so in all truth, one, possibly two points will be enough for us.
Rafa Benitez has worked another miracle and kept Newcastle up despite having to deal with the Mike Ashley shit show. Salomon Rondon and Ayoze Pérez get the goals and the signing of Almiron in January has given them a bit of a creative spark which are seen them win enough games to keep themselves above water. Fair play to Benitez and Newcastle fans must be absolutely praying that he is still there next season. They already have the two points that we need so hopefully, like Wolves last week, they really won’t need to win as much as we do.
Ralph’s press conference this week revealed that we have a few walking wounded with Jannick Vestergaard sounding like the most likely not to make this game which will probably mean a return to the 4-2-2-2 formation which to me, would mean that it’s a straight choice between Josh Sims and Stuart Armstrong for the left-wing birth.
When the team was announced it was confirmed that Vestergaard was not fit but also that Yan Valery was not available either so when I first saw the 11 players I thought it was going to be for 2 to 2 with Romeu and Stephens, the two recalled. I thought this would mean Stephens right back but as the game started to become apparent that JWP was right wingback and we had three central defenders with Bednarek moved to the left and Stephens on the right. Hmmmm… really not sure about this. Another surprise for me was Mario Lemina being fit enough for a place on the bench.
The early action confirmed The Newcastle were going to attack the JWP/Stephens channel on the right hand side of our defence. Rondon puts Almiron on his way downt he win and his cross is tipped away easily enough by Gunn. Rondon is a huge powerful unit and it worries me seeing Yoshida and Stephens up against him.
We win a corner which Bertrend swings in from the right hand side. Dubravka the keeper flaps it down but it falls to a Newcastle player and one big boot forward and nine of our players are out of the game as we again show a horrendously shit approach to keeping the back door shut. Almiron and Rondon are clean through with just JWP back. As any hard and cynical pro would, JWP just takes him out Almiron about 70 yards from goal with absolutely no interest in the ball at all. It should really be a clear red card but the rules are such that it’s a chance worth taking. Newcastle go nuts, one of their assistants gets sent to the stands and all Newcastle gate is a free-kick 70 yards out and a yellow card for JWP.
We don’t get away with it for long however as Yoshida tries to pass the ball into Hojbjerg in midfield but it’s got flashing blue lights on top of it and a siren is wailing as Hayden steams in and wins the ball which drops to Pérez who is kind of half closed down by Bednarek and Yoshida and he fires it across the goalkeeper and in off the far post. Fucks sake. Totally preventable goal. Considering that this is a classic Ralph goal - win the ball high and attack quickly – you’d think our defenders would know how to not cough up this type of goal.
Two minutes later had a ball down the JWP/Stephens channel and Rondon delays long enough before crossing to the back post along the ground and Pérez has stolen a march on Bertrand, bounces the ball towards a goal and Gunn has dived early and the ball bounces over the top of him and in. Absolute shite
We have a half chance with an Ings header from a corner straight after that but it really isn’t very much at all and an easy grab for the keeper. JWP’s nightmare on the right continues on the right when he fails to cut out a ball and Almiron takes the piss out of Hojbjerg and Yoshida before the ball ends up with Gunn. He would have taken the piss out of Stephens but he was nowhere to be seen. We heed the warning by letting them piss down our right hand side again and Almiron’s low cross finds Rondon at the back post but this time at least, Bertrand is awake enough to chuck himself in the way.
Half time and no doubt Ralph is giving it the big one – at least I hope he is because we’ve been fucking awful. As the teams re-emerge it becomes obvious that hes not been happy. Stephens and Sims have been both been utterly non-existent and are replaced with Armstrong and Lemina as we switch to a back four. Bear this in mind – Ralph has left JWP on at right back when he’s on a yellow card, rather than put Stephens there. The change around is instant with Armstrong immediately bustling past two players in the Newcastle area and crossing low, causing a bit of panic and we win a corner. In it comes and Yoshida meets it well but flicks it wide when he really should’ve scored.
Though we are the better side now, Newcastle are still creating the better chances as again they go down our right hand side and pull the ball back to Ki who smashed one at the far post and luckily for us he manages to be very accurate and hit the far post and it pings across and out. Would be good if someone could actually fucking close him down.
At the other end of the pitch, Lemina then shows we can do as Redmond breaks away down our right and crosses along the top of the penalty area to Armstrong. His touch bounces down and Lemina, striding forward takes a touch before side footing superbly into the far corner of the net. Brilliant finish and despite being a bit of a shambles, maybe we can get something out of this after all. Game on!
There was a minor delay in us being safe from relegation during the week when Brighton managed to continue their free-fall towards the Championship by losing at home to Cardiff which means that we are only five points ahead of the Welsh Dead Player Transfer Fee Dodgers. Both Brighton and Cardiff have horrific fixtures to come so in all truth, one, possibly two points will be enough for us.
Rafa Benitez has worked another miracle and kept Newcastle up despite having to deal with the Mike Ashley shit show. Salomon Rondon and Ayoze Pérez get the goals and the signing of Almiron in January has given them a bit of a creative spark which are seen them win enough games to keep themselves above water. Fair play to Benitez and Newcastle fans must be absolutely praying that he is still there next season. They already have the two points that we need so hopefully, like Wolves last week, they really won’t need to win as much as we do.
Ralph’s press conference this week revealed that we have a few walking wounded with Jannick Vestergaard sounding like the most likely not to make this game which will probably mean a return to the 4-2-2-2 formation which to me, would mean that it’s a straight choice between Josh Sims and Stuart Armstrong for the left-wing birth.
When the team was announced it was confirmed that Vestergaard was not fit but also that Yan Valery was not available either so when I first saw the 11 players I thought it was going to be for 2 to 2 with Romeu and Stephens, the two recalled. I thought this would mean Stephens right back but as the game started to become apparent that JWP was right wingback and we had three central defenders with Bednarek moved to the left and Stephens on the right. Hmmmm… really not sure about this. Another surprise for me was Mario Lemina being fit enough for a place on the bench.
The early action confirmed The Newcastle were going to attack the JWP/Stephens channel on the right hand side of our defence. Rondon puts Almiron on his way downt he win and his cross is tipped away easily enough by Gunn. Rondon is a huge powerful unit and it worries me seeing Yoshida and Stephens up against him.
We win a corner which Bertrend swings in from the right hand side. Dubravka the keeper flaps it down but it falls to a Newcastle player and one big boot forward and nine of our players are out of the game as we again show a horrendously shit approach to keeping the back door shut. Almiron and Rondon are clean through with just JWP back. As any hard and cynical pro would, JWP just takes him out Almiron about 70 yards from goal with absolutely no interest in the ball at all. It should really be a clear red card but the rules are such that it’s a chance worth taking. Newcastle go nuts, one of their assistants gets sent to the stands and all Newcastle gate is a free-kick 70 yards out and a yellow card for JWP.
We don’t get away with it for long however as Yoshida tries to pass the ball into Hojbjerg in midfield but it’s got flashing blue lights on top of it and a siren is wailing as Hayden steams in and wins the ball which drops to Pérez who is kind of half closed down by Bednarek and Yoshida and he fires it across the goalkeeper and in off the far post. Fucks sake. Totally preventable goal. Considering that this is a classic Ralph goal - win the ball high and attack quickly – you’d think our defenders would know how to not cough up this type of goal.
Two minutes later had a ball down the JWP/Stephens channel and Rondon delays long enough before crossing to the back post along the ground and Pérez has stolen a march on Bertrand, bounces the ball towards a goal and Gunn has dived early and the ball bounces over the top of him and in. Absolute shite
We have a half chance with an Ings header from a corner straight after that but it really isn’t very much at all and an easy grab for the keeper. JWP’s nightmare on the right continues on the right when he fails to cut out a ball and Almiron takes the piss out of Hojbjerg and Yoshida before the ball ends up with Gunn. He would have taken the piss out of Stephens but he was nowhere to be seen. We heed the warning by letting them piss down our right hand side again and Almiron’s low cross finds Rondon at the back post but this time at least, Bertrand is awake enough to chuck himself in the way.
Half time and no doubt Ralph is giving it the big one – at least I hope he is because we’ve been fucking awful. As the teams re-emerge it becomes obvious that hes not been happy. Stephens and Sims have been both been utterly non-existent and are replaced with Armstrong and Lemina as we switch to a back four. Bear this in mind – Ralph has left JWP on at right back when he’s on a yellow card, rather than put Stephens there. The change around is instant with Armstrong immediately bustling past two players in the Newcastle area and crossing low, causing a bit of panic and we win a corner. In it comes and Yoshida meets it well but flicks it wide when he really should’ve scored.
Though we are the better side now, Newcastle are still creating the better chances as again they go down our right hand side and pull the ball back to Ki who smashed one at the far post and luckily for us he manages to be very accurate and hit the far post and it pings across and out. Would be good if someone could actually fucking close him down.
At the other end of the pitch, Lemina then shows we can do as Redmond breaks away down our right and crosses along the top of the penalty area to Armstrong. His touch bounces down and Lemina, striding forward takes a touch before side footing superbly into the far corner of the net. Brilliant finish and despite being a bit of a shambles, maybe we can get something out of this after all. Game on!
Mario gets changed during the game and posts his goal on Instagram
Then the moment when a clinical side would have equalised. Redmond recycles a corner and chips back in for Yoshida to volley left footed. He’s only 6 yards out and has a free shot but it flies narrowly over the bar.
You sense that that might be our best chance to get a point disappearing over the bar because we’re still defending horrifically as JWP, now an orthodox right back loses a ball which gets knocked forward and then Bednarek manages to fuck up, kicking the ball against Atsu. The ball runs out for a goalkick…. I mean it’s a good yard over the line but Atsu gets the cross over from Row C of the fucking stand, it gets weakly headed out by Bertrand to the edge of the box. Hayden smashes it goalwards and it flicks off a defender and Angus Gunn makes an incredible save one-handed whilst going the wrong way. Somehow we are still in this.
Time is running out though and with a couple of minutes to go, a cross is chipped in to our box and Bednarek makes a total bollocks of the header and puts it straight into the centre of the penalty area where it’s headed back in by Ritchie and Pérez neatly deflects it past Gunn for 3-1, game over and a hat-trick.
We still have one more chance with Yoshida again meeting a corner with a header from less than 5 yards but again put it too close to the goalkeeper who saved relatively comfortably. The End.
Maya - Deadly at Our End of the Pitch, not So Much at Theirs
Ralph decided to go for a very attack minded 5-2-3 formation
in the first half but Romeu and Hojbjerg got swamped and Sims did absolutely
nothing with Redmond and Ings struggling with very little possession. With Stephens
and Sims replaced with Lemina and Armstrong, we became the better side
instantly and if we’ve been more clinical with our chances then we may have
even got out of the game with a point. We are not clinical though so giving
someone a 2-0 start as I was going to be majorly difficult to come back from.
We were still coughing up chances of the other end in the second half and I
never really felt that we were going to get back into it.
You can’t really say it was totally down to the formation - there was some fucking dreadful individual defending out there. You can point fingers at Yoshida and Bednarek for the first goal, at Stephens, Bertrand and Gunn for the second and at Bednarek once again on the third goal. Since when did heading the ball clear to the edge of the box dead central, become a thing. We must’ve done that about four times yesterday and it resulted in the third goal and if it wasn’t for that unbelievable save from Gunn there would’ve been another.
Mario Lemina showed exactly what a class act he can be with his goal and if he fancies it (which is always the case with Mario) then he will be a real asset until the end of the season, perhaps giving us a more mobile, more forward thinking alternative in the centre of the park.
No matter how patchily we played, we were beaten by the better side and Newcastle were decent and I can only hope for their sake as I said before, that Benitez stays. He won’t win manager of the season of course because that will always go to a Guardiola or a Klopp but he is in the conversation for sure. The spine of the team is very good with Dubravka, Schar, Lascelles, Hayden, Rondon and Perez. Add to that the hard work on the wings of Almiron and Ritchie and a couple of decent solid full backs and there is a very efficient side there. Technically not the best but a decent side. It’s not a disgrace to lose them as St James Park but it’s just disappointing that we only played 45 minutes.
So, work still to do, starting with a trip to Watford in mid-week. No need to panic but we do need to get this done as soon as possible. Ralph got it wrong today and I’m sure he’ll admit that to himself and will correct it for Watford. He got it wrong earlier in the season against Cardiff at home and we responded well soon after. Bring it on.
You can’t really say it was totally down to the formation - there was some fucking dreadful individual defending out there. You can point fingers at Yoshida and Bednarek for the first goal, at Stephens, Bertrand and Gunn for the second and at Bednarek once again on the third goal. Since when did heading the ball clear to the edge of the box dead central, become a thing. We must’ve done that about four times yesterday and it resulted in the third goal and if it wasn’t for that unbelievable save from Gunn there would’ve been another.
Mario Lemina showed exactly what a class act he can be with his goal and if he fancies it (which is always the case with Mario) then he will be a real asset until the end of the season, perhaps giving us a more mobile, more forward thinking alternative in the centre of the park.
No matter how patchily we played, we were beaten by the better side and Newcastle were decent and I can only hope for their sake as I said before, that Benitez stays. He won’t win manager of the season of course because that will always go to a Guardiola or a Klopp but he is in the conversation for sure. The spine of the team is very good with Dubravka, Schar, Lascelles, Hayden, Rondon and Perez. Add to that the hard work on the wings of Almiron and Ritchie and a couple of decent solid full backs and there is a very efficient side there. Technically not the best but a decent side. It’s not a disgrace to lose them as St James Park but it’s just disappointing that we only played 45 minutes.
So, work still to do, starting with a trip to Watford in mid-week. No need to panic but we do need to get this done as soon as possible. Ralph got it wrong today and I’m sure he’ll admit that to himself and will correct it for Watford. He got it wrong earlier in the season against Cardiff at home and we responded well soon after. Bring it on.
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