World Cup 2018 - Quarter Finals - Neymar Dives Out

I Wish That Witsel (Right) Had Hoofed the Cheating Fucker in the Head

The quarter-finals. The last eight. From a blogging point of view. I have never arrived at the last eight of the tournament with England still in it. Usually, we have been shit and on our way home by now. We are of course still in it and so games that would usually merit only a passing interest became very important.

France v Uruguay
France and Uruguay got the ball rolling and Uruguay were missing Cavani which in my book, immediately made France the favourites and so it proved as they ran out comfortable two nil winners. The first half saw them took the lead as Griezmann flighted in a free kick and Verane flicked home really well. Uruguay had a great chance in the second half after a header by Caceres was brilliantly kept out by Lloris and France sealed the game when Griezmann tried a potshot from miles out and Uruguayan keeper Muslera, basically, did a Karius and dropped it over his own head into the net. Griezmann had made a point before the game that he felt part Uruguayan which was a bit fucking wierd and not celebrating scoring a goal in the World Cup quarter-final is very fucking weird as well. So out go Uruguay and that’s probably the last we will see of bucktooth psychopath Luis Suárez at the World Cup. At least this time he didn’t blatantly cheat like in 2010 or bite someone like in 2014.

What Happened Next?

Belgium v Brazil
Belgium and Brazil was a clash between two of the tournament heavyweights and promised an intriguing clash between Brazil’s commitment to attack and Belgium being excellent on the counter-attack. Brazil nearly scored from a corner when Thiago Silva managed to bundle the ball onto the post from about 3 inches out and it was a Belgian set piece that did for Brazil when zero communication meant two players went to head out a corner and succeeded in neither of them doing it and the ball flew into the net off Fernandinho’s shoulder. Brazil then went into full attack mode which basically played right into Belgium’s hands as they lost the ball and a lightning quick break by Lukaku ended with Kevin De Bruyne arrowing the ball into the far corner to the Belgians 2-0 up at half-time.

Brazil were better in the second half and penned Belgian back and then Neymar, took time off from losing the ball every time he had it, to start driving around. Firstly, he completely initiated contact with Fellaini went down like a sack of shit in the penalty area.  The referee saw it, basically gave him a bollocking to diving and then didn’t book him.  What the fuck is going on?  A few minutes later, this dive came back to bite Brazil as Gabriel Jesus was trashed by Vincent Kompany what look like an obvious penalty but even after a review by the VAR officials, no penalty was given. Brazil eventually got one back through and Augusto header Belgium held out thanks to a decent Courtois tip over from Coutinho and despite collectively blowing out of their arses for the last 10 minutes, secured a semi-final against France.  A final piece on Neymar – he’s a cheating fuck and the referees encourage it.  If you deal with a  problem in the correct way then it goes away.  If he dives then book him, if he does it again, send him off.  It’s like the grappling in the penalty area – start giving penalties and it goes away.  Neymar’s legacy from this World Cup has been encouraging hundreds of kids to make videos of themselves rolling around.  Even the kids know how ridiculous he is and I hope he’s proud of that.

So, France against Belgium in one semi-final and now we move on to the other half of the draw.  

England v Sweden
I moaned again when Ashley Young was picked but this (I have to accept) is Southgate’s first choice team so let’s get on with it. Sweden are more or less at full strength as well and I can’t believe I’m watching England in a World Cup Quarter Final and am confident we’re going to win. After England looked the better side from the first whistle with Sterling in particular, stretching the Swedish defence to breaking point, especially Granqvist who was really struggling to keep up. It took 25 minutes to take the lead and it was yet another set piece. I was not full of optimism when Young went up to take it but he put over a great ball to roughly the penalty spot and Maguire found himself completely unmarked to power a header into the net for 1-0. It should’ve been two before half time when a superb through ball from Henderson found Sterling with just the keeper to beat but the keeper delayed him a bit and then Sterling delayed himself trying to make up his mind what to do and the chance was gone.

"Gerrout the Fookin' Way"

The second half started with Sweden in the ascendancy and we seem to be asleep as a cross was met by Berg and his firm downward header was superbly clawed out by Pickford who was suddenly looking twice the goalkeeper he looked in the earlier matches. The save made England re-focus and concentrate and on the hour it was 2-0 with Lingard putting a cross right on Dele Alli‘s head. He had timed his run perfectly and headed past Olsen for 2-0. Pickford had to be at his best on a couple more occasions but overall England saw this game out fairly comfortably and you sensed, could have won by more if they have wanted to or needed to.

This is fucking brilliant so far. I was not over enthused when Southgate got the job but he has done the one thing that I have been crying out for every England manager to do since 1990 and build a team and not pander to big name individuals. Of course we have star individuals in this team like Harry Kane and players who play for the traditional big clubs but everyone of those players is playing for the team at the moment and not for themselves.  I’m sure that if a situation in a game needed Southgate to tell Harry Kane to play centre back, then he would without question. Sven Goran Eriksson couldn’t even get Steven Gerrard or Frank Lampard to stop bombing forward and play as a defensive midfielder. Southgate has found a system that works for the players that he has, moving Kyle Walker to a slightly unfamiliar role for the benefit of the team. It makes me laugh reading Twitter where fans of Manchester City for example are aggressively defending Sterling because he plays for Manchester City. You see United fans aggressively defending Rashford and demanding he be included ahead of Sterling. It’s laughable really. The reason this England team is still in the tournament is because club rivalries have been completely put aside. England’s latest hero is Harry Maguire who most recently has played for Leicester and Hull. Previous managers would not have even had him in the squad, let alone in the team ahead of Chelsea’s Gary Cahill or Manchester United’s Phil Jones. It just wouldn’t have happened. Southgate needs applauding for that, more than he needs applauding for wearing a fucking waistcoat. He also binned Wayne Rooney which Hodgson should have done four years ago.

I always find it interesting to compare the BBC and ITV coverage of England matches. ITV usually get the gig during qualifying but it is shared in the finals. The BBC coverage is usually absolutely miles better and was good yesterday apart from the commentator (Guy Mowbray) who was a complete fucking arse from first to last.   Co-commentator Martin Keown was ok aside from trying to sell Harry Maguire to a big club as soon as he'd scored.   It worries me that every football fan has the Kenneth Wolstenholme iconic commentary from 1966 etched in their mind... "some people are on the pitch... they think it's all over... it is now".   Even fans who weren’t born at the time have these iconic words. If England win the whole thing, what the fuck are we going to have this time? Some prick shouting “England win, England win” and Mark Lawrenson making some glib joke in the background... and some other tosser speculating on which of the big clubs Harry Maguire is going to join as soon as he gets home... and how Karius had concussion in the Champions League Final... and it all reminded us of when Solskjaer scored in the last minute for United.

After the very tiring experience of watching England it was then time for...

Russia v Croatia
Personally, though Croatia are undoubtedly the better side, I would prefer England to play them than the Russians. I can’t be the only person who is slightly concerned that Russia are suddenly performing amazingly and way above expectations, in a major sporting event. I don’t feel bad for thinking in this cynical way because of the ridiculous amount of evidence there has been recently. Maybe it’s down to the training camp that they just are the fittest team who cover the most ground. Maybe it’s all a big coincidence.  I also don’t think you’d have a prayer of getting a decent shake off the referee and off the VAR if you were playing the Russians in a semi-final.

Halfway through the first half, Russia’s star of the tournament Denis Ivan Drago-Cheryshev, plays a 1-2 and bends a left-footed curler over the top of the keeper and into the top corner from 30 yards. Dodgy positioning by the keeper but an amazing goal nonetheless.  Just before half time, a break down the Croatian left, a cross from Mandzukic and a header from Kramaric makes it 1-1.  We then had a goalless second half of players dropping like flies with cramp and Ivan Perisic hitting the inside of the post for Croatia. I’m sure no one supporting England was remotely bothered that it went to extra time with Vida giving Croatia the lead again with a header from a corner and Drago-Fernandes equalising for Russia with another header with five minutes to go. Penalties again. The first Russian penalty - bearing in mind everything that was riding on it, was right up there with the worst penalties I have ever seen. Drago-Smolov tried to chip it down the middle but instead of doing that he hoped, managed to chip it to his left and Subasic, the goalkeeper who had already dived and was on the ground, had time to make a second movement and just pat the ball away. Utter shit.  Croatia missed the second kick and so it came down to the Brazilian player Mario Ivan Drago-Fernandes, who Putin had granted some sort of express Visa to so he could play in the tournament. He tried to smash it but he almost looked like someone who doesn’t know how to kick a ball when he shanked it horribly wide of the post.  As in the last round, it eventually fell to Ivan Rakitić to take the fifth Croatia penalty which he dispatched easily to send the Russians out and give England a World Cup semi-final against Dejan Lovren.

You Look a Right Prick if the Dink Doesn't Work

So, Russia go out having achieved much more than they thought they would – not winning it but not embarrassing themselves.  They would certainly have taken that at the start and they can be proud in having staged a great tournament so far.  For England now - Croatia are a better side than anyone we have played before (I’m ignoring the game against Belgium’s reserves) but it’s certainly not a team we should fear – they’ve needed penalties to beat both Denmark and Russia - and there is no weight of history against us like they would be if we were playing Germany or Brazil.  I predict England will spend a lot of time without the ball but will win simply because our attackers are better than their defenders.  1-0 to England.  Belgium and France is a flip of a coin job but I’ll take a punt on it being and England v Belgium Final on Sunday – without the reserves this time.