Premier League Match 22 - Southampton 1 Manchester City 1

 

Not a Bad First Premier League Goal

Free-hit time. Manchester City at home. It’s OK everyone, they’ve only won 12 times in a row. Covid absences?, AFCON? No problem, we’ll just play our second XI of £50 million plus footballers so no worries. Actually, we probably actually don’t need them as we could put 11 dustbins out on the pitch because Pep Guardiola is our manager.  It’s tough being City.

The only time Manchester City and Pep get on my tits is when they pretend they haven’t got all the advantages going and that they are in some way hard done by. There is absolutely nothing that is not stacked in their favour. As I’ve said many times before, the game starts with 11 versus 11. In this respect, both teams have the same resources but as soon as the game starts, City have the advantages, end of discussion.

How to get anything out of a game against City? Well, we’ve already done it once this season when we played 4-2-2-2 at the Etihad.  You need to make sure that you have a threat going forward to stop them camping within 40 yards of your goal and you have to concentrate for 95 minutes, most of which will be spent without the ball.  You have to keep the correct distances between defence and midfield and you also have a bit of luck and get a fair shake off of the referee. To that end, we have Simon Hooper today who we have had a couple of times recently and he’s been largely very good in those games.

This season of course, City’s marquee signing was Jack Grealish for £100 million quid, five times our transfer record. He used to be the only player that you worried about when you played against Aston Villa but now he is one of 11.  All I try to do when we play City is focus on the players who are not quite as good as all the others, those being Gabriel Jesus who is Brazil’s starting centre forward, Kyle Walker who is England’s starting right back and Raheem Sterling who is virtually the first name on every England team sheet.  My opinion perhaps but those three are not at the level of the likes of Kevin De Bruyne, Phil Foden, Rodri, Ruben Dias etc. Maybe one of those lesser players will make a mistake but are they are more likely to make a mistake then one of your own players? So, strap yourself in, work hard and hope for the best.

Having had around 3 pm games we are now gifted the shitty 5.30pm slot on a Saturday which is particularly shitty for the Manchester City travelling fans, who no one in the FA actually cares about. Well, not as much as they care about money.

In what was definitely a first, I managed to exactly predict the formation and the starting line-up as we walked to the ground. Stuart Armstrong and Redmond on the wings, Adams and Broja up front and KWP coming in at right back. The rest of it was pretty obvious. City had their first choice team out, no doubt about it with the possible exception of Gundogan and Mahrez but a midfield three of Rodri, De Bruyne and Bernardo Silva isn’t too bad.  Foden, Grealish and Sterling is not a bad front three either.

Away we go and we seem to spend the first 5 minutes chasing the ball around and generally not getting a touch.  The composure they have is ridiculous.  Adams has to come back into his own half on the left to set up our first real bit of possession and he combines with Armstrong to find Romeu, who switches is out right to KWP.  Forward he goes and pushes a pass behind Cancelo to Redmond who return it back to him.  What happens next is mad.  KWP takes a touch and with the outside of his right boot, gives Ederson no chance with a shot across him into the far corner.  Mental – what a goal.  It’s not quite Cuco Martina but what a fucking goal.  That’s just going to annoy them isn’t it.

Back to more City possession with Grealish at the heart of most of it, dropping deep to pick it up.  We are getting tight really quickly, none more so than Bednarek who steams into Grealish who executes a somersault in mid-air that Tom Daley would have been proud of and lands in a heap.  As Bednarek picks up a deserved card, Oriol feels the need to go and tell Grealish the marks out of 10 he was awarding for artistic merit.  Grealish is immediately cured of his death throes and is up giving Romeu a shove.  Romeu doesn’t move.

I Would Love to Know What He Said.

City aren’t really getting anywhere in terms of shots on goal but we are still maintaining a threat as Romeu, like he did against Brentford, spots the run of Broja from deep and clips it between two defenders. Broja takes it down superbly before advancing on Ederson and slipping it past him but the flag has gone up to kill any celebration. There is no protracted VAR check so I’m guessing it must be pretty obvious.

A few minutes later and Adams does superbly to retain possession before poking it through to Broja, who advances on Ederson again and tries to go round him and over he goes but once more, before we can get too excited and start screaming for a penalty and a red card, it’s fucking offside again and once again, it’s clearly not even marginal.  Doesn’t stop the Clark Kent with the X-Ray vision behind me, who can see it wasn’t offside from 100 yards away.

There is a warning straight after that are Sterling twists past Perraud on the right and side but when the Eangland international should be getting his head up and picking someone out, like a decent player would, he takes a wild swing with his left foot and it’s always going over the bar. Raheem Sterling simply isn’t that good and that’s a hill I’m prepared to die on.

Having voiced that slightly contentious opinion, which of course you should never do whilst said player has time to make you look a right dick, Cancelo goes down our right and gets the cross over, Perraud misses it and there is Sterling who has an absolute sitter at the back post but he hits it straight at Forster from 6 yards, who toe pokes the rebound away as well.  Redmond fannies around with it and gets tackled but we just about get away with it.

We’ve nearly reached half-time now but once more, Redmond has given the ball away and City come forward with de Bruyne threading a lovely ball in between our defenders and Salisu steams across to block the cross from Walker.

Half time – bloody hell.  We’ve been excellent here.  Not too many heart attack moments and we are in the main defending very well.  It’ll be interesting to see how we keep the concentration levels up in the second half as it must be so tiring playing against this lot.  As the teams emerge for the second half, Ralph has rolled the dice with Redmond coming off and Elyounoussi coming on. I assume he thinks the new man will track the runner better and look after the ball.

Surprisingly, we’re back on the attack immediately and Perraud’s cross is blocked behind for a corner. In it comes from JWP and in a Brentford carbon copy, Bednarek gets up and flicks it goalwards but unlike Brentford, it hits Ederson and they get it clear.  A foot either side and that was in.

Stuart Armstrong breaks forward energetically and slides Broja in between Laporte and Cancelo but Laporte just about stays with him and then blocks the shot from behind him. Really good defending it has to be said.  Bastard.  JWP puts in the corner from the right hand side and it’s headed across by Salisu and Broja gets up in front of Ederson and heads it onto the post, fuck, out it comes for Bednarek to lash over the bar. I can’t help but feel that the flag would’ve gone up had Broja stuck it in the net.

Just when we’re beginning to get carried away with ourselves and our attacking threat, KWP tries to take on Cancelo and is on the receiving end of a properly good tackle which enables City to break and it’s terrifying.  They work the ball through the players out to the right hand side with Rodri knocking it and getting it back 25 yards out and he looks up, and pings one towards the top corner.  I’m up the other end mouthing the word ‘fuuuuuuck’ as it flicks off the top of the bar and goes over.

Pep agrees with me that Raheem Sterling is ass and off he goes to be replaced by Jesus.  Jesus’ first miracle is to be dragged down by Che Adams on the right hand side.  De Bruyne stands over it, plays it in and we go to sleep as the delivery is met at the back post by Laporte, who is one of three unmarked players who have broken through the somewhat feeble attempts to block them off. Bollocks. What a shit goal to concede.

Now it’s just seems to be a case of whether we can hang on or not and every time the ball goes to Kevin De Bruyne you think it’s unlikely. He picks it up on the edge of the box and lets fly with one of those ridiculous efforts with very little backlift…. Ping…. Off the past and away and Fraser wasn’t stopping that.

After that little escape, Ralph has decided that Bednarek has walked the second yellow tightrope for long enough and he’s off to be replaced by Lyanco.  That’ll calm things down.  More pressure as De Bruyne goes over on the edge of the box and someone somewhere is getting excited and getting in the referees ear.  The words ‘Checking Possible Penalty’ come up on the screen.  Shite.

It takes so long that both teams have a mid-season break… but we get away with it.  Bizarrely, the screen tells us it’s a foul but outside the box.  Can’t go back for that lads, play on.

Stuart Armstrong does play on and tries to close down Laporte in City’s left back area and catches hin with a high foot.  Laporte, who of course can’t decide if he’s French or Spanish, also can’t decide if he’s dead or merely fatally wounded.  Armstrong gets booked but the dreaded VAR sign appears on the scoreboard checking possible red card. Fucks sake.

“Hi there Hoops, Darren England here”
“Are you going to be a bit quicker this time Daz”
“Just slowing it down again to see if he definitely catches him”
“He does, I know, I’ve booked him, shall we get on with it”
“Hang on – super-slomo forwards, super-slomo reverse….”
“Come on Daz, Laporte’s gone down again with PTSD of some sort”
“…super-slomo zoom in, super-zoom in telescopic…”
“Laporte’s up again, he’s being a bit of a knob to be honest… Daz, what’s going on?”
“… telescopic super slomo fine grain forwards… and back…. Yep – he defeinitely caught him”
“I know, I’ve booked him – clear error on my part?”
“…super slo-mo in…”
“Bye Darren”

As explained on my official VAR transcript, whilst the check is going on, having got back to his feet and not had any treatment, Laporte decides to sit on the ground and start rolling around again. What an absolute fucking wanker. Check over, no red card, still no treatment for the port and he doesn’t have to leave the pitch.  Ralph can’t get Stu off the pitch quick enough and on comes Diallo.

90 gone, 6 to go.  Shite.  Pressure and lots of it but the answer is Salisu.  He’s ridiculous.  Tackles, headers, blocks, everything.  City break dangerously up our left and Sali is virtually last man with de Bruyne running at him.  Bang, ball won, de Bruyne on deck without ball.  On we go.  Brilliant, full time.

No you Fucking Don't

Thank fuck that’s over.  That is an absolutely outstanding performance and an outstanding point gained at the end of it. I always feel like a bit of a knob celebrating a point at home but anyone who gives a supporter of a team like Saints a hard time for celebrating a point against the multi billionairoes of Manchester City, needs to get in the bin, quite frankly.

The word that springs to mind is immense. Let’s start with a goalkeeper: Fraser Forster was absolutely immense today and Pep must’ve been having Barcelona nightmares with Fraser being back to his Wall like best this week.

In front of him you have Mohammed Salisu who was just absolutely imperious. He has it all really, pace, good in the air, really good one-on-one and his passing is pretty good.  If I had to nit-pick, I would say he has to avoid going to ground on occasions but today he was absolutely superb.  His passing is improving all the time as well.

Next to him, Bednarek and then Lyanco also played a huge role in keeping City quiet. Most of it is down to concentration and they did that.  I could’ve done without Lyanco being an overlapping centre back on the right wing in the last couple of minutes but that’s just him, a lunatic.  A word today for Romain Perraud. Sometimes his positional play is a bit lacking, and he doesn’t block as many crosses as he should but when he gets close enough to the winger he is incredibly difficult to play against and his persistence today resulted in Raheem Sterling doing nothing and getting substituted and Gabriel Jesus doing nearlynothing when he came on.  On the right of course, you have KWP and whatever he did defensively today will be eclipsed by the goal that he scored which was of course absolutely outstanding.

Jack Shoves Ori, Ori Barely Notices

The best laugh that I’ve had for a long time was learning after the game that Jack Grealish was waiting in the tunnel for Oriol Romeu. That must be the first time in football history that someone who wears a fucking Alice band to play has decided to have a word with one of the most uncompromising hardest bastards in football.  Who’s your money on? Hilarious. Oriol must’ve absolutely struggled not to piss himself laughing. The flashpoint came of course from the incident where Bednarek got booked basically because Grealish did a somersault when the tackle came in.

Talking of reactions or over reactions, I have never seen anything quite like Aymeric Laporte.  He got caught by Stuart Armstrong and got up and was fine until there was a VAR check and then he decided to put himself on the ground again and start rolling around.  You pathetic wanker.  What happened to ‘bringing the game into disrepute’ because if that isn’t bringing the game into disrepute I don’t know what is.  After the VAR check he of course carried on with no treatment and didn’t leave the pitch.

Up front today we had Armando Broja and Che Adams.  They haven’t played many games as a strike partnership and you could tell at times that they didn’t really have a telepathic understanding but the two of them worked so incredibly hard today and the understanding will come and this is definitely the partnership we should persevere with going forward.

Ralph got it spot on today. It was no surprise to me that we went 4-2-2-2 because that has worked against City in the past but I thought the substitutions were spot on today. He’s worked out that when you play against teams to do throw themselves around that it’s not worth leaving players only have a yellow card for risk of them getting a red, hence the withdrawal of Bednarek halfway through the second half and the withdrawal of Armstrong after the VAR check against him.  All the substitutions played a part today. Elyounoussi was fairly quiet but his role was mainly to shore up the left leg ahead of Perraud and both Diallo and Lyanco had a positive impact when they came on. We stayed brave and tried to play out all the time which was very difficult because City are so good at pressing.  Against most sides we look like we can pass it through them relatively comfortably but City are different and we got a bit panicky at times with Salisu and Bednarek knocking it around with Forster.  However, the ends justify the means and we got away with.

Raheem Sterling proved that he is average.  It was a shame when Pep took him off because he’d almost been our best defender.  We knew that if he got a cross in that it was just going to be random spam into the box and never pick out a player and you were not remotely surprised when he missed that absolute sitter at the end of the first half.  He’s another player that when his pace starts to go in a few years time, he will be another Theo Walcott in that there’s not a lot of footballing ability to fall back on.

As a spectator it’s hard watching games when you’re only have 25% possession whatever it was but you can really admire the hard work that goes in to playing against a team like City. Keeping them arm’s-length like we did takes a phenomenal amount of effort and it’s just a shame that having kept them out in open play, we conceded from a fairly tame set piece. You can’t help but be proud of the boys though for the way they went about it and if we can put in that much effort and work in our next two games against Tottenham and Manchester United then there is no reason why we can’t pick up points in those as well.

Before that though, it’s a week off and then it’s the FA Cup 4th Round against Coventry which will be a chance for a few players to get some minutes and a perfect opportunity to get into the 5th Round. As Mick Channon said at half time, we ain’t going to win the league so why not give the FA Cup a real good go.

Premier League Match 21 - Wolves 3 Southampton 1

 

Don't Shoot From There - It's Miles Out

Every time a game against Wolves comes around, I realised that I don’t know much about them. The reason for this is because I’m always asleep by the time they come on Match of the Day because they are usually on late because their games are usually very boring. For some reason, Tottenham thought it was a good idea to take the architect of this kind of football and making him their manager at the start of the season and that didn’t work out very well. In Nuno Espirito Santo‘s place, Wolves employed Portuguese (surprise surprise) manager Bruno Lage, who has continued the good work of Nuno by mainly, boring the shit out of everyone.  However, his football has got results which is what it’s all about.  When we played them earlier on in the season, both teams were winless at that point and we produced a shocker of a performance and fell into the trap that was set by giving away a soft goal which ultimately won Wolves the game.  We don’t want any of that today please lads.

Wolves are incredibly well organised and will take advantage if you are not the same, which explains why they managed to relatively easily beat Manchester United at Old Trafford a few weeks ago. Since they won that game at St Mary‘s, which as I said, was their first win of the season, they have been showing almost Champions League form and are currently eighth in the table.  It is not however, a game that we should go into with anything to fear.

Our nemesis over the last few times we’ve played Wolves has been Pedro Neto but he is unavailable and so the main threat today will be Raul Jimenez. It’s great to see him get a run of games after the horrible injury he suffered last season. They still have Adama Traore who has recently been linked with a move to Spurs because they need a player who looks good on a highlight reel, beats lots of players but hardly ever scores or sets up a goal.  The back line is marshalled by Conor Coady and is usually very uncompromising with Max Kilman and Roman Saiss being the other two centre backs. It’ll be interesting to see how they handle the pace and power of Armando Broja.

There’s been a lot of talk this week about the chances of us having Broja with us next season either as a permanent deal or on loan. As far as I can see, there is absolutely no incentive for Chelsea to sell him now but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try to get the deal done. Basically, with four years left on his contract, the value of the player is only going to rise over the next three transfer windows so the sooner we try and get it done the better. Chelsea are a strange club regarding contracts so you never know. They have just given a four-year contract to Michy Batshuayi who has basically not played for them for about four years and is well past the promising youngster stage.

Good news from the Saints is that KWP is back in training after having a bout of Covid. Covid has now become a convenient excuse for certain Premier League teams to get their games called off.  The AFCON, injuries, suspensions, transfer window being open and a need to loan out players are the real reasons.  The more this happens, the more it annoys me and the bigger shambles it is. As it stands, our one game yet to be rearranged is against Newcastle, who have signed two players since the date of the original game so far. My money is on there being at least three more by the time the game comes around. Ralph’s suggestion that these players shouldn’t be allowed to play in the rearranged game has largely been met with indifference from the people that matter.

Ok, same team as Brentford with no KWP.  It will be interesting to see if it works against a better side.  Fair play to Wolves, they have a few missing but there has not been any suggestion that this game would be called off.  They have a few kids on their team / bench so fair play to them for having a bit of integrity.
Away we go and its Saints on the front foot, winning a succession of early corners.  The closest we come to doing anything with one of them is Romeu heading the ball back into the box, Salisu flicking it on and Bednarek going in with Sa but not managing to get a decisive touch.

Then I remember what I hate about Wolves as in quick succession, Podence and Ait-Nouri go down screaming after two challenges that amount to the square root of fuck all.  Fucking get up you embarrassing twats.  To his credit, the referee Michael Salisbury doesn’t give them free-kicks but unfortunately he doesn’t book them either so it’ll happen again.

Tella has a decent run down the right hand side, made easier by the absence of Ait-Nouri who is somewhere else, presumably rolling around in fake agony. Tella plays it infield to Romeu who wisely decides against shooting but instead to knock it out to Perraud, who cuts in on his right foot and smashes it near post but Sa gets down to save comfortably enough.

We have hardly seen Wolves as an attacking force until diving little shit Podence tries a backheel in midfield but it goes straight to Tella who seems to get caught in two minds between clearing it and trying to start a Saints attack, so he loses it.  Podence finds Jimenez in the box who is superbly tackled by Lyanco and the ball breaks to Ait-Nouri who goes to ground of course under a challenge from Bednarek.  No worries, ref gives a corner. The referee Michael Salisbury is not interested in a penalty but Wolves certainly are because the bastards are all around the referee, led by Moutinho and Coady. Saints are decidedly not impressed with this behaviour and some handbags and shoving goes on and we go upstairs to VAR

“Hi Michael it’s young Robert Jones at Stockley Park”
“What do you want Robbie, it’s only a corner?”
“Yeah but all the Wolves players are yelling at you mate, we’ve really got have a look at something cos a few games have been called off and we’re bored”
“Really, oh go on then if you must”

[Time goes by, civilisations rise and fall, eventually….]

“Got it. We’ve slowed it down to a tenth of its natural speed”
“And….”
“He hasn’t meant it but the clumsy defender has definitely made contact with Ait-Nouri”
“Really Robbie?”
“Yeah, you may wanna call an ambulance on Health and Safety grounds because he’s clearly been murdered, judging by the way he is rolling around.”
“No need mate - he’s already up and screaming in my face that they should have a penalty. Okay send me to the monitor - I’m there now”
“There you go Michael, ridiculously slowed down which means that it’s going to be a definite penalty.”
“Can’t really argue with that lad, penalty it is.”

Sometimes when you look at penalty takers you can tell if they’re dodgy or not or whether their bottle is going to go but there is no way that Jiménez is going to miss and sure enough, he rolls in as calmly as you like. Bollocks.

Saints try to get back to it with Redmond picking up the ball on the right and playing it to Romeu who curls over beautiful cross right onto the forehead of Salisu and all he has to do is head it down but he heads it at savable height and Sa is close enough to it to get off the ground and push it away. Good save but he really has to score from there.

Some more good link-up play on the edge of the box and JWP puts Perraud away on the left and his cross deflects and bounces over the top of Broja but there is Tella at the back post, getting in front of the full back but shiteing the chance over the bar. The flag has gone up but that’s against Broja and it has to go down as a horrible miss and it would’ve counted had it gone in.

Half time.  Irritated.  We should have scored.  Bloody hell Wolves are annoying.  We’ve been disjointed again despite the chances we’ve created and no surprise that Ralph has clearly agreed and Diallo is off to be replaced with Adams.  Ok, we’re back to 4-2-2-2 but this leaves Bednarek at right back.

At the start of the second-half we win a throw on the right hand side which is hurled in by Bednarek, Broja flicks it on and Romeu competes for it, gets a toe to the ball and then Dendoncker, who is already committed to try and clear it, kicks him in the leg.  Clear foul. Just you wait till the VAR twats slow this one down and have a look at it.  Definite penalty. Saints have decided to not get all around the referee, who has basically let the game go on as Lyanco sends the ball into orbit.  Dendoncker is being a complete prick and motioning the thought Romeu dived. As if.  Romeu to his credit but not to our advantage, has got straight back up and limped away without making a massive fuss.

What do you mean no VAR review? Looks like the phone lines to Stockley Park aren’t working for fucks sake.  Whatever the reason, we have been completely fucked over there.

Fraser Goes Walkabout - Doesn't End Well

The game goes on.  Wolves have a goal disallowed for a clear offside and a few minutes later, Lyanco leaves one on Podence, who of course goes down like a massive sack of shit or more accurately, like the tiny little 5 foot nothing sack of shit that he is. In comes the free-kick and Fraser Forster is off his line to go and claim it but he gets absolutely fucking nowhere near it. Kilman heads it over him and Fraser just turns and watches as the ball bounces off the inside of the post and Conor Cody nods it into an empty net.

We may get away with it because there is a VAR review for offside against Kilman.

“Hi Robbie it’s Michael, you there?”
“Rob?”
[silence]
“Was Kilman offside there for the first header?”
[silence – faint snoring]
“Fuck me Rob, is that why there was no review of that penalty shout earlier?”
Zzzzzzz
“Goal then innit?”

And there we have it, we’ve thrown them another preventable goal.

Saints try and respond with Redmond playing quite possibly its first decent pass of the afternoon to put Adams through but as we know with Che, he hasn’t got a left foot so his scuffed near post effort is easy for Sa to save.

10 minutes ago and Redmond picks up the ball and a halfway line and runs before being cynically taken out by a combination of Coady and Moutinho. This is a good 35 yards out and Wolves obviously don’t think there’s any danger because they’ve only set a two man wall.  Up comes JWP and hits an absolute thunderbastard which rips away into the opposite corner that he normally aims for and Sa can’t get nowhere near it. What a ridiculous free-kick. He’s cut across that with his right foot and it is absolutely pinged away into the right top corner as he looks at it.  Game on.

90 minutes are up and Wolves are getting slightly nervous, diving around a little bit more as usual but Saints have possession and Stuart Armstrong works it out to Bednarek on the right hand side and fair play to him, he digs over a really good cross which is met by Perraud at the back post and his header back across crashes into the angle of post bar and down and Stuart Armstrong’s follow up is half blocked by defender so just runs through to the goalkeeper. Fucks sake.  That you suspect will be out last chance.

We’re gambling at the back now and it’s nearly 3-1 straight after as Fabio Silva bundles through on the left hand side and forces Forster into a decent save but it comes out to Traore who lashes the open goal over the bar.  Having not covered himself in glory allowing Fabio Silva to get the shot in in the first place on the last attack, Lyanco then makes a bit of a fanny of himself by signalling that he is injured to the referee without going down, so play goes on and Adama Doesn’t-Do-Weights runs into the big hole that Lyanco has left and outpaces Salisu before drilling it across Forster and into the far corner of the net. 3-1, fuck off.

Okay, I have a certain amount of humble pie to eat because Wolves today were relatively entertaining.  I’m not really here to talk about them though but fair play to them on their victory and I say that mainly because despite having a few players missing through Covid and having to throw in some youngsters, they did show some integrity and actually turn up. This is what happens when you do what you should and for that reason alone, they deserve the three points that they got.

Whether they actually deserved to win three points based on the 90 minutes of football I’ve just watched is another matter. There is the small matter of refereeing consistency. The ref was sent to the monitor to watch the Bednarek challenge on Ait-Nouri about 30 times before arriving at the decision to award a penalty and to be honest, I can see exactly why was given because Bednarek’s merest brush of the ball doesn’t negate the fact that he took the guy out, even though Ait-Nouri is a pathetic diving cheat at every opportunity. There was a course an incident in the second-half where Romeu got his toe to the ball before being wellied up in the air by Dendoncker but there hardly seemed to even be a VAR check, possibly because Saints as usual, were too fucking nice and didn’t get in the face of the referee.  I promise you that if that one gets viewed properly on VAR and slowed down, then it’s a penalty.

When their incident happened, Ait-Nouri of course went down like he’d been fucking snipered and every Wolves player nearby got around the referee and there was a load of pushing and shoving and you can just imagine the guy at Stockley Park going, oh there must be some sort of incident to look at here I better slow this one down and have a look closely. When Romeu’s incident happened of course, Ori just got up and got on with it and no one questioned the ref. The answer should be to ignore all the theatrics and do everything on its merits but that isn’t going to happen so we have to get more in your face about this sort of thing.

Ralph was fuming after the game for the same reason but I do have to agree with his assessment as well that the referee overall was decent, not falling for the theatrics that Moutinho, Ait-Nouri and Podence and others in gold going for an Oscar whenever there is any sort of coming together of players. It is quite frankly fucking embarrassing the way they roll around, rivalling Tottenham for the most play-acting team in the division.

In my opinion, sticking with the same team and formation as we had against Brentford was wrong. I don’t know what the fitness levels of KWP were like after his absence but if he was fit then he should’ve played. It is a bit mystifying why he didn’t come on in the second half when we were basically relying on Bednarek to get forward from right back and get crosses in.  The things that were wrong and disjointed in the first half against Brentford were also wrong and disjointed in the first half today.

Ibrahima Diallo didn’t seem to know where we should be and it was no surprise that he got hooked at half time because Ralph clearly agreed with me.  Not to sugar-coat it at all, Nathan Redmond was crap.  He played once more like he was trying to get through the game without getting injured and without engaging in any sort of challenge with the Wolves defenders. The bloke cannot play with his back to goal so using him as a centre forward or as a number 10 in the middle of the pitch just does not work. He’s been half decent when he’s played on the right wing this season but stick him on the left or playing up the middle and he doesn’t deserve a place in the team.

We could’ve got something out today in the second half but Fraser’s old weakness came back to haunt him on the second goal when he got caught in absolutely fucking no mans land on the cross and then seemed content to just stand and watch while the ball was pinging about before Coady stuck in the net. JWP’s ridiculous freekick gave us hope and we got unlucky with Perraud’s late effort against the post. The third goal didn’t really matter because we would’ve lost anyway but again it keeps up our run of being the team you wanna play if ever you’re out of form and have gone months without a gold. Just how does Adama Traore get to be that size without doing any weights? It’s an absolute fucking mystery.

We have started to give shit goals away and we have to stop doing that pretty damn quick. The whole incident with Bednarek giving the penalty away was started by Nathan Tella failing to clear the ball when he had a clear chance to do so. The second goal was a goalkeeping nightmare. You can definitely say that we didn’t get the breaks today and similar to the game at St Mary‘s, Wolves just waited for us to make a mistake and pounced on it and won the game. I think they go into every game settling for 0-0 but if they nick a goal and get in front, they are very very good at holding the lead, through bring well organised and maximum shithousing - diving, rolling around, time-wasting etc etc. I have grudging respect for that but it must be horrible to watch and deep down, you know that the likes of Conor Coady are embarrassed by it.  Today we contributed to our own downfall, with the penalty we gave away and then we managed to throw ourselves deeper in the shit with Fraser’s calamity.

It’s a shame that we didn’t get anything out today because as you know, our next three games are Manchester City, Tottenham and Manchester United, Manchester City will definitely turn up but it’s in the lap of the gods as to whether Tottenham and Man United will. We have to make an effort to get the defensive solidity back that we had earlier on in the season. Remember, we got very creditable draws with all three of these teams earlier on in the season but we’re going to struggle to pick up points against them this time around if we keep shipping goals that could be prevented.

Bring it on.

Premier League Match 20 - Southampton 4 Brentford 1

 

All Smiles Before Semmens Tells Solak How Much Broja Will Cost

Brentford at home on a Tuesday night and I’m back to loving evening games again. With the Covid pandemic I am now working from home so it’s a lot easier to get to the game on time than it was before. Can’t wait.

We had to wait a couple of weeks of course because this game was supposed to be played in mid-December but was one of the first ones to get called off because of the bizarre new ruling that the Premier League have put in place, which enables teams to request the game be called off when they have a few Covid cases.  I say “a few” because no one knows the actual number and for some reason, injuries, suspensions and international call-ups are now a factor when teams are trying to justify getting a game called off.  Absolute bullshit.  

Initially, I didn’t have a problem with Brentford requesting that the original game got called off but that was before it became abundantly apparent that teams like Leicester, Newcastle and especially Liverpool, we are basically manipulating the fixture list for their own ends. That reached a crescendo this week with Liverpool getting their league cup semi-final against Arsenal postponed because they had a Covid outbreak which, as Jurgen Klopp explained yesterday, was in fact a massive batch of false positives. When he says false positives, he possibly means, utter bullshit. What are the chances of the one in a thousand false positives that you get statistically, happening to about 10 players in Liverpool squad all at the same time? It’s a weird one and no mistake. It’s a bit like the 80% Covid rate that they have in Newcastle when their best striker gets injured and they are about to sign about 10 new players in the transfer window and the spike in Covid infections at Leicester whenever a few of their defenders are injured.

Anyway, here we are and Brentford will be eyeing up Saints as a team they can get something out of in their quest to survive their initial season in the Premier League. So far, they have looked like they will survive it comfortably, sitting as they do, about three places above us in the league.

To be honest, they have been an absolute breath of fresh air this season, picking up points without grinding the shit out of it and their manager, Thomas Frank seems to be a very likeable character. Of course, we are more interested in Brentford these days because of the takeover that we’ve just had with Rasmus Ankerson, one of the three men behind our new ownership, being one of the main men behind Brentford‘s rise up the leagues.  Apart from when they play us, I wish absolutely no ill will to Brentford and hope they achieve their aims for the season.

Ralph Hasenhuttl has the right back conundrum to solve tonight and I fully expect Captain JWP to be deployed there. There are a couple of interesting choices to make assuming everyone is available who we expect to be available.  I’m early to the ground, through the “rigorous” Covid status checkpoint and the team is announced.  Lyanco’s presence means it looks like 3 at the back with JWP at wing back.

Fast forward an hour and we line up and it looks weird.  JWP is in the centre of midfield and it looks like Tella is at right back – OK then.  It’s weird - in possession it’s almost a 3-3-4 with Perraud and Tella pushed really high.  Diallo doesn’t look comfortable out on the left of the midfield three with no full back behind him.  Interesting.  Anyway, it’s Salisu long throw time, gets headed back to him and he wins a corner when he tries to cross it back in.  JWP curls it in from the left hand side and Bednarek just walks forward a yard and flicks it in for 1-0.  How easy was that?  Where was the keeper?

As the game settles down we look kind of clunky as players get used to the formation.  When we get it down near the Brentford defence, we look dangerous.  Broja picks it up on the right and as he does, decides to run straight towards goal and he pisses past the left back and makes his way along the goal-line but no one makes the run to the back post for a tap in and his cross misses everyone.

Brentford aren’t offering much about from hopeful chips into the box which are meat and drink to Salisu, Lyanco and Bednarek.  One such chip is headed out by Salisu, picked up in midfield and spread wide to Mbeumo.  We don’t get across quickly enough in a clear hybrid defence failure and he gets a cross in which is expertly volleyed home by Janelt.  Bollocks – literally their first attack, 1-1.

Diallo begins to grow into the game and confidently runs forward down the left and combines with JWP and Perraud for the latter to find Romeu with the cross about 10 yards out and he spoons it into the crowd.  Good move, wrong player on the end of it.  Before we have time to get too down about it we win a corner on the right, JWP plays it in, everyone misses it and Diallo picks it up and for no logical reason, decides to hit it.  It goes near post and fuck me, it’s gone in.  How on earth has that happened?  Bearing in mind I’m up the other end, it takes a big screen replay to tell me that the keeper Fernandez has had an absolute mare.  Not only was he too slow to get over to the bouncing near post effort, it has come off the post, hit the back of his hand and gone in.  That’ll be an own goal, which is a bit of a shame for Ibra but I’m sure he won’t mind too much.

There is one more incident before half time as Redmond produces his one bit of decent play for the half with an excellent first time volleyed cross, which Perraud went up for at the back post and Fernandez clawed away from near the angle of post and bar.

It’s a bit strange to be at half time and winning and whilst at the same time, not being over impressed by what I’ve seen.  We experimented with this hybrid defence thing last season and it didn’t work and we’ve just about got away with it so far tonight.  I can’t help but think that Thomas Frank will work out a way for Brentford to be more dangerous in the second half, maybe by switching play more often.  Against that though is the realisation that Brentford are not very good or most certainly, are not playing well.

Any doubts about things are more or less dispelled three minutes into the half as we break up a Brentford attack on our left, Diallo and Salisu play us out of trouble and then Romeu gets his head up and plays a straight ball between two defenders into the path of Broja who is clean through on the half way line.  There is no way a defender is going to catch him as he bears down on Fernandez from the left, shoots, the keeper gets a piece of it …. but it carries on and into the corner of the net.  3-1 – get in.

Gentle Nudge to New Owner

Having returned to the bench today after a dose of Covid, Che Adams is the first sub on 65 minutes, replacing the ultimately disappointing Redmond.  Fresh legs against a tiring and slow defence – like it Ralph.

Five minutes later, boom, Diallo smashes it forward and his clearance turns into a chance as no defender heads it and Adams gets enough of a touch to give him a chance and as Fernandez comes out and attempts a Schumacher challenge (look it up kids, 1982 World Cup), Che gets a toe to it to lob it into the net, 4-1 and this is all going rather swimmingly now.

Stuart Armstrong is on for Tella and Stu’s presence means of course that we are going to win.  JWP has now gone to right back and it’s shame that we have to take Broja off a few minutes later when he gets totalled by a clearance which smashes him straight in the face.  I say it’s a shame because it would have been nice to bring on Simeu or Small as the third sub as the game is won bit instead it’s Adam Armstrong.

Nothing much happens from an attacking point of view in the last 10 minutes but we do slacken off a bit defensively when we get caught on the break down our left and Toney’s cross to Wissa looks perfect for a tap in until JWP appears at the end of a lung busting recovery run and gets a foot in.  The resulting corner is missed by everyone, Fraser then has to save from Toney as he bundles through.  Before we clear it properly, it’s crossed back in by Jensen and Mbeumo looks certain to score before The Wall is put up in front of him again.

Well that was an incredibly strange experience. Watching the last 20 minutes of the game without a care in the world knowing that we’d won. Saints were basically far too good for Brentford, especially in the second-half and we were absolutely clinical when we got our chances and if you are clinical then you can cover up a few deficiencies elsewhere.

There were undoubtedly some deficiencies in the first half. We were switching all the time between a back four and are back three and we didn’t seem to know what we were doing half the time.  The one time that Brentford got their attacking play right, our defensive system broke down and the cross came in and they scored from it. It all looked a bit disjointed in attacking sense as well and to be honest, I thought Ralph had over-thought it again. You have to remember though that the changes were born out of necessity with us having no right back available. The second half though we played it really well and put the game to bed.

I do feel that against a better side than Brentford, we may have had a few issues defensively when trying to switch between systems, if Brentford had switched the ball from side to side with any urgency and accuracy - but the way we played tonight was more than enough to beat a very poor Brentford side. From what I had seen of them and with their results, I expected them to be a lot better than they were but keep playing like that and they could still be in the relegation shake up. I feel a bit sorry if their two forward players, Toney and Mbeumo, who hardly had a sniff all evening apart from a little three-minute spell when the game was already won, when Fraser had to bail us out on a couple of occasions. With a fussier referee, Toney could well have been sent off and his frustration was clear. Brentford’s main issue though was the defence and the goalkeeper. The goalkeeper seems to spread panic amongst the defenders and the central defenders were so slow, Pontus Jansson in particular.

There was some absolutely outstanding performances for Saints today. JWP has certainly gone up another gear in the last few weeks. Ralph has often mentioned that he is captain by example, never shown more than with the sliding interception he made in the 82nd minute to prevent a certain goal for Brentford. To show that level of commitment to defending at 4–1 up is quite something. Oriol Romeu was absolutely immense today, which went along way to dominating the midfield and set the platform for us to win the game. Ibrahima Diallo seemed to be a bit lost, position wise in the first half but had an excellent second half.  I was also very impressed with the shift that Nathan Tella put in, basically operating with a lot of discipline as a right wing-back and the back three were aggressive and confrontational and basically, very difficult to play against.

Romeu is Not the Maddest Bastard in this Photo

I love Lyanco, who is an absolutely mad bastard. He is a throwback to a previous era of big characters. He takes some chances at times and makes things ridiculously difficult for himself, like the time he tried to bring the ball down on his chest when he had to players up is arse and another time when he lost the ball and then chased round like a Jack Russell trying to get to the ball as three Brentford players passed it around. He was great. Cult hero stuff.

And another goal for Armando Broja, another good goal to and when he broke through from the halfway line you knew that A) they were not going to catch him and B) there was a 95% chance that he’d score. Dragan Solak was in the crowd today, equalling Gao's appearance record at the first opportunity. Welcome Dragan, I hope you had a good day and enjoyed the game, please can we have £25 to £30 million to sign this centre forward.

Just think, if we had been a bunch of shithouses like Newcastle, Liverpool or Leicester, we could probably have fabricated a few Covid cases, you know, false positives, that sort of thing and got this game postponed. There is irony in the fact that Brentford got this game postponed once. Justice has been done and we have been rewarded and though the league table is somewhat uneven in terms of games played, mainly because of reasons just outlined, we are up to 11th place.

It is undoubtedly another good day for Ralph. In front of the clubs new hierarchy, we romped to our biggest win of the season just a few days after 120 minute slog with 10 men against Swansea. It’s another one of those days where I didn’t quite understand the methods used to get the result but that doesn’t matter, we don’t have to understand them, we just have to be pleased with the result, which was excellent.

Next up is a trip to Molineux to play the minded numbingly dull and rigid Wolves side, who are still the only team to beat us at St Mary‘s this season. We owe them one. Bring it on. Up the fucking Saints.