Never forgotten. What was your reaction when we got drawn against Man United? I instinctively shouted ‘yes’ when it happened and it took all of a second to feel differently. Ah well, let’s have a go and see what happens. No doubt Sir Taggart would rest a load of players like he did last time when we were managed by the Dutch Genius that was Jan Poortvliet. If memory serves – that time they had Berbatov playing and he won the game on his own.
There have been a few titbits coming out of the SFC camp this week, starting with the signing of Dany N’Guessan on loan for the rest of the season from Leicester City. He’s been a star for Boston Utd and Lincoln City so excuse me if I don’t get too excited by this one. I guess it’s cover for the inevitable Puncheon exit which if the stories of big strops and refusal to travel are to be believed, can’t came soon enough. Alex Chamberlain... yep, still our player... The only high profile midfield departure was Paul Wotton leaving for Yeovil on a permanent basis. Best of luck to the bloke and have you noticed how their results have picked up since he went there on loan. Personally, would rather have him on the bench than Gobern, any day. If anyone would like to write a book on the Dutch Revolution we had at SMS, I reckon an interview with Wotton would be a good place to start...
It’s been a week where no other football news has been relevant aside from Andy Gray and Richard Keys being sacked / resigning from their role at Sky Sports for sexist comments about a female referee, amongst other ‘put yer hand down ‘ere love’ insightful comment and analysis. Best bit of all that was Charlie Brooker describing keys as an Orangu-twat on 10 O’Clock live. The only reason I’m mentioning this is because I hate Sky Sports and what it’s done to the game at the top level.
Talking of the top level... here are Man Utd...Reserves... hmmm. Keeper I’ve never heard of and a mixture kids (Fabio da Silva, Smalling), veterans (Scholes, Owen) and players who are never ever going to get a regular game in the Premiership (Obertan, Gibson). It was amusing to see that they had Berbatov, Giggs and Nani on the bench, as well as the guy on £200k a week who hasn’t had a decent game for 10 months but he has scored a hat-trick in that time with Ethel, Vera and Felicity Minx. Saints have rested a few with Bart in goal, Butterfield and Harding at full backs and Seaborne in for Jaidi. We’ve got Barnard, Guly and Sir Rickie all playing, so we appear to be going for it... nothing to lose I guess.
Unusually for a game against opposition of this calibre, SMS isn’t full which some patches of empty seats visible in the top corners of the Chapel End. This is a bit disappointing but there are many reasons why – live on terrestrial TV, increased price of tickets, the need to buy a ticket for the glamour Carlisle fixture... and the fact that it’s fucking freezing cold. We boosted the crowd by having three inflatable men at each end and we missed a trick by not having an inflatable woman in front of Rooney who would have probably tried to give it some money before mounting it. Before the players came out we did our bit for inter-fan relations by showing 1976 on the big screen as well as a few highlights of the 3-1 Grey Shirts game and the 6-3 win. Any United fan hoping to see video of the many trouncing they have given us in the past few years, was disappointed.
Away we go and Saints are being positive and going forward – Morgan is spraying the ball about and we look good. Seven minutes in and we had the ball in the net as Chaplow crossed for Harding who was lost upfield and he stuck it away. To be fair, there was no time to get excited as the flag was up well before it got to him. TV replays say correct decision but it was close and of course, if United had scored that at Old Trafford, it would have been ruled offside as well.
We win a couple of free kicks in dangerous areas and Sir Rickie fires them both narrowly over the bar. Having argued and won the case with Guly in order to take them, I feel he should let Guly have a go next time as the 'well hit free-kick that flies over' routine is getting a little tiresome. The free kicks are awarded against Darron Gibson who really should have got booked for the retaliatory hack against Schneiderlin.
The player who used to be Michael Owen is running around in midfield, like a dog chasing a bit of paper being taken on the wind. When Owen gets the ball his touch is heavy and usually Schneiderlin takes it off him. He has the odd good touch or pass but he looks like a little boy lost... bet he scores later. One bloke just along from me asks who the no.7 is for United, which is funny as it’s a bloke who has scored 40 goals for England. He nearly gets another one here as he shinned a cross over from the right wing which dropped over Bart and bounced back off the far post.
After a ten minute spell when United looked like they were taking over, the ball found itself out with Butterfield on the right and he whips in a perfect cross onto the head of the arriving Gulyman who seems to time his jump all wrong and heads over from about 8 yards. It’s a bad miss and on a day when we aren’t going to get that many chances, it’s especially not good.
I was still rueing the chance gone begging when Chaplow burst into the box on the right, past the half hearted challenge of Evans and fairly lashed it into the roof of the net giving Lindegaard no chance at all. Bloody hell, we’re winning! Of course, we had no idea how long we’d hold the lead for but it was going to be at least 15 minutes as the ref blew for half time and off we went. I repeat, bloody hell, we’re winning.
Following a half time windmill from Micky Channon, we of course expected Sir Taggart to utilise his bench at half time as in all honesty, United had been pretty poor and surely, the attacking threat of Berbatov, Nani, Giggs and Shagger would be unleashed. It was with some delight that we were informed that Wes Brown was coming on.
The first chance of the second half fell to Dan Harding who, playing like he was possessed by the ghost of Chris Marsden, in a ‘Phoenix from the Flames’ moment, cut in from the left wing and just kept going, past about four players, two of which totally bought Dan’s stumble over the ball. All of a sudden he was through on goal and like Chris Marsden, he scuffed it and there the similarity ends as the keeper just picked it up.
Five minutes later and Sir Taggart had seen nothing to suggest that United were going to get back into it and so he took off the anonymous Gibson and Anderson and replaced them with some proper players with Giggs and Nani taking their places. Whether it was tiredness or fear I don’t know but our midfield immediately took a step backwards and Giggs started to run the match. It took all of seven minutes for Obertan to go past Harding and hit in a cross which deflected off of Seaborne’s arm, straight onto the head of the player who used to be Michael Owen who had a flashback and nodded it in. Here we go...
To my surprise, Saints got back on the front foot and it was nice to see that they do practice stuff on the training ground as a corner routine between Harding and Chamberlain, ended with Harding’s cross just going wide of the far post as no one threw themselves at it. Straight after this we replaced Barnard with Dickson as we looked to be more solid in the middle of the park. As Dicko went on, Nigel clearly instructed him not to give the ball to Giggs 20 yards out but this is what he did and one pass later, Hernandez rolled it past Bart for 2-1.
The rest of the game passed by with very little incident as the ref decided that enough was enough and that he was going to give every single decision United’s way. He’d been ok up to that point but he reffed like he was Taggart’s insurance policy against Saints having a go at getting back into it. For the benefit of Keys and Gray – the ref was male and he was shte. Saints for their part gave up and replaced Chaplow, who had been our best player, with Gobern who practiced his Charlie Chaplin slapstick repertoire and promptly fell over. Dany N’Guessan came on for the Gulyman for the last 10, went up front and I think, touched the ball once.
Final whistle and all over in the FA Cup for another year. I was pleased that we at least gave them a game this time and that we didn’t get completely rolled over. In order to win a game like this you have to take your chances when you are in the ascendancy and in the first half we needed to create more than we ultimately did. Two nil at half time would have been interesting. For us, there were some very good performances with Butterfield and Harding doing well at full back, helped no doubt by a lack of width from United. Schneiderlin was predictably good against the better opposition and I thought The Gulyman gave them countless problems, until it came to delivering the final ball. Man of the match for me was Chaplow who is looking like the buy of this or any other season at £50k. It was a matter of time before our philosophy of passing the ball wherever came and bit us on the bum and Ryan Dickson was the unfortunate one who gave the ball to Giggs. In the League, the player may have miscontrolled it or overhit the pass and the forward may well have missed but this is Ryan Giggs we’re talking about and Javier Hernandez who seems to score every time he has a shot.
The post match coverage of the game has been predictably sycophantic towards Michael Owen. Yes he scored but for the first half he was terrible and looked like a little boy lost in his advanced midfielder position. He did start the second half a lot a better and got more into it as the Saints midfield tired. When he went up front though it took him all of five minutes to do what he’s done for 14 years. I felt that Saints could really have done with having Hammond on the bench to come on with half an hour to go and start rattling some cages in there... again Gobern looked really weak when he came on and his inner ear infection which means he has the balance of a giraffe on roller skates and spends the whole game on his arse. I bet he never has to put his shirt in the wash after a game, just his shorts where he’s been sat down on the grass.
The quest for league points begins again on Tuesday night with a trip to Devon and the other St. James’ Park. Exeter are very difficult to beat at home but I’m backing us after today, not to have another ‘Tranmere’ and come home with the bacon. 18 games to go.... many wins required.
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