Manshaming
Today's visitors to St.Mary’s are the
multibillionaires of Manchester City. They were one of the big clubs to in the
summer who employed a superstar manager and spend yet more millions to propel
them towards silverware. It hasn't
really worked out and I don't think that Pep Guardiola has found it as easy as
we and he thought it would be. Whilst their performance could probably be
deemed as acceptable they have been some moments when it's all looked decidedly
crap. After one game, which I think they
actually won despite a couple of dodgy refereeing decisions, Pep appeared to be
having a meltdown of Kevin Keegan/Rafa Benitez proportions and I seriously
wondered if he was going to walk away.
He also has this bizarre insistence on playing a
goalkeeper who cannot catch the ball. Claudio Bravo is so bad that you really
may as well put A midfielder in goal or pick someone who hasn't got any arms.
Regardless of all this, I look at the list of players they have and it's
fucking ridiculous as there are world-class players all over the place. It
really does make you wonder how the fucking hell we going to be able to compete
with these guys in a match, let alone over a season. This is why cracks me up
when I see some Saints fans crapping on, on social media about how we should be
challenging for the top four.
There was another example of what we are up against
during the week when it emerged that Jesse Lingard at Manchester United have
been given a new contract on £100,000 a week. If he was a Saints player he
would be on about a quarter of that. Do you want to play for Southampton or do
you want to play for Manchester United and earn four times the amount? Tough
one. All you can do is hope that
whatever player sees his long term career benefiting by playing for Southampton
but it hardly ever fucking happens as we know only too well.
This brings us all rather nicely to the vast increase
in transfer noise around the destination of Virgil van Dijk at the end of the
season. It seems that every club is instructing their pet media outlets to put
their name in the frame, possibly to sell season tickets but more likely with
an agenda to unsettle the player. Everton are the latest, joining Liverpool,
Chelsea and Manchester City and I've just read that Real Madrid are interested
as well. Well, if all those are
genuinely interested and we are going to sell then we are hopefully going to be
looking at north of £70 million. Everton though? Fuck off.
Social media brought us another incident during the
week when an alleged Saints fan very misguidedly praised the atmosphere at
Fratton Park over and above what we get at St.Mary's. Of course, he tagged Pompey so of course the
knuckle draggers are all over it. well played you stupid little twat. You just don’t do that if you don’t want to
get dogs abuse. Just so you know, I’ve
been sent a screenshot of that tweet by four separate Pompey mates. Maybe it’s my fault for having too many
Pompey mates but in the main Alex, it’s your fault you stupid twat and enjoy
your day at Notts County.
Judging by the footage released from training at the
end of the week, it looks like Manolo Gabbiadini will be back for today which
has to be a good thing. We will not be creating too many chances today as we
will not have the ball often enough, so when we do get one it would be handy if
we had a striker who would actually hit the target especially bearing in mind the
absolute ass clown who is in goal for the opposition. Maybe stay in the game and bring him on with
25 to go.
Steve Davis is back for us today and take the place of
Clasie in midfield and Gabbiadini starts instead of Shane Long which is a bit
surprising. I am resigned to the fact that Maya and Jack will be the centre
backs and this will be a huge test for them. City’s team on paper looks
ridiculous. There are potential weaknesses there with the goalkeeper and Navas
at right back but elsewhere the team looks ridiculously strong. There is not
one English player with Sterling and Stones nowhere to be seen but a front four
of Aguero, DeBruyne, Sané and David Silva gives me the shits. It’s almost the perfect front four - pace,
artistry, movement and a deadly finisher.
In midfield they have Yaya Touré and Fernandino so that's not bad either
and Vincent Kompany is back. If he had been fit all season then they would be a
hell of a lot closer to Chelsea than they are.
Away we go and we sit back and let City have the ball
and they don’t take long to carve us open on our right with Clichy getting a
cross over and Aguero putting it wide.
We compound that problem with Fraser shanking the kick, one pass and
Aguero is through again on the left but he screws his shot across the goal and
wide. Keep playing like this and it
really isn’t going to take too long.
We’re struggling to get hold of the ball and in true
Guardiola fashion, as soon as we do then City flood towards the ball and
invariably win it back again. We do get
forward on 15 minutes with a great move up from the back with Redmond finding
Gabbiadini who gets his head up on the left and finds Tadic on the penalty spot,
totally clear, left foot and shins it over the bar. Fucking rubbish. Gabbi did exactly the right thing in picking
out the better placed Tadic but I’m now wishing he’d just hit it like he did
against West Ham from a similar position.
We’ll pay for that.
Whilst we’re waiting for that to happen though, we
have a decent spell where Bravo flaps away a Tadic cross and eventually Cedric
works it to JWP whose cross finds Davo who heads over. Bravo really is a liability but Pep would
argue that it works as he pisses about with it and gets closed down but
eventually finds a way out and City tear up the pitch with Aguero putting in a
cross from the left which deflects up and Silva really should score on the volley
at the back post but puts it wide.
We pick up a flurry of bookings as Hojbjerg and Davis
both pick up deserved cards and then Bertrand rakes Aguero but somehow gets
away with it. Also getting away with it
is Kompany who trashes through the back of either Tadic or Gabbiadini for the 3rd
time and not even a word. We stay in the
game by almost rigidly playing 4-4-1-1 but eventually Sané gets through. Fraser comes rushing out, dives at his feet
and makes what looks like a great save, pushing it wide for a corner. Sané leaves the appealing to the City bench. Good lad and refreshing to see a young player
at a huge club reluctant to throw himself and make a big deal out of
things. No doubt that will be beaten out
of him eventually.
Half time and 0-0.
Could we hang on? I don’t really
see it happening but you never know. Of
more concern is that Gabbi has hardly touched the ball and Tadic is having one
of those shockers where he just might as well not be there. Anyway, a positive start to the second half and
Davis makes a run across the field, looking for all the world that he has no
idea of what to do with it so being tripped by David Silva was a good result
for him. The free kick is on the left
and in prime JWP territory. Everyone
knows he’s going to aim it at the near post and everyone knows that Bravo is
shit. Over the wall and well wide. Crap.
Unforgiveable to not get it on target.
On the hour mark, Stephens makes his first mistake of
the day by getting mugged by Aguero and he has to pull him back and give a free
kick away. De Bruyne’s delivery is crap
and it gets cleared to Navas and he pings in a decent first time effort which
Fraser helps over the bar. In comes the
corner and Kompany manshames Yoshida to a massive degree and batters the header
straight at Fraser who can only fumble it into the net from close range. All
their pretty football and we get done with the good old fashioned corner and a
header – again showing the glowing weakness in our central defensive
partnership – no one who is dominant physically in the air.
Claude rolls the dice and seems to go from mega
defensive to ‘shit or bust’. JWP is off
for Boufal and Gabbi off for Long. In
the recent Bournemouth home game, taking JWP off led to the shape of the team
going completely to shit so will lessons have been learned or will history
repeat itself? Immediately is looks like
the latter as it’s all City with de Bruyne causing havoc on the right and
firing over a perfect cross which Fraser comes for and ends up heading Aguero’s
knee but whetever – we got away with it.
Boufal has been brought on to give us something and to
test out Navas at full back but he’s picking it up too deep and usually giving
it away. When we get the ball to him
further up the pitch, he works his magic and gets the cross in but Shane can’t do
anything with it. We have a decent chance soon when Tadic puts in a right
footed cross from the left and Yoshida is still up from a corner and meets the
header cleanly but should do more than head it straight at Bravo. The City fans are celebrating because their
keeper has saved an on-target shot – fucking hell, anyone with two arms would
have saved that.
Game over -Saints attack and the ball goes up in the
air and de Bruyne pulls off this turn that takes three Saints players out of
the game, a 1-2 with Silva and he’s gone up the right and away, drawing ht
elast defender before slipping it to Sané who buries it. Really good goal that. It looked to me that Sané was offside but he
probably wasn’t so that’s the end of that.
Oh look, thousands of Saints fans leaving when there are about 20
minutes to go. Just fuck off.
So – what did the deserting thousands miss? Not much really – we offered nothing in
attack needless to say and then Otamendi thorough Long with what looked like a
nasty tackle, play on though and de Bruyne ends up with the ball again out on
the right and he sends over a perfect cross for Aguero to head in from two
yards to make it three. Easy as you like. Shane Long is off for J-Rod – I assume
because of the effects of the Otamendi assault but he seems to be kicking off
big style at the bench. A shit end to a
shit day.
Thank Christ that’s over. Now I can go home and whato
do you know, it took a lot less time to get out of the ground today because
about 50% of people have already fucked off. About half of those left when the
second goal went in (75 mins) and our section was embarrassingly empty by the
end. In fact, it was a very embarrassing day for the general image of the fans
of Southampton FC. As well as providing the football community watching on
television with images of half empty ground by the end, there were also some
wonderful images on match of the Day of some of our fans actually filming
Manchester City players celebrating one of the goals. Proud of you guys, you complete
fucking melts. Personally I would ban any twat over the age of 12 who is
recording an opposition goal, presumably so they can watch it back later.
Fucking awe-struck at the superstar players you see on Sky… mind you – same
could be said for our players and manager.
Don't get me wrong, we played a vastly superior team
to ourselves today and that should be absolutely no surprise bearing in mind
how much the team cost and who the manager is. What sticks in my throat is that
we basically turned up, had a little run around, waited to get beaten, got
beaten and then went home. We seemed absolutely paralysed with fear and even
before City scored their first goal, we hardly committed anybody to attack, no one
gambled making an overlapping run etc and it must've been one of the easiest
games that's the clown in the Manchester City goal has ever had. A completely
embarrassing effort.
For once, Claude said something interesting in his
post match interview in that he echoed my feelings about going in out we just
weren't good enough and didn't make enough options for ourselves. All but you have the power to change that
Claude. Half time saw no change in the
pattern whatsoever with us basically playing 4-5-1 and getting nowhere. Then at 1-0 down we go suicidal and take JWP
off and bring on Boufal, giving us absolutely no shape whatsoever (exactly what
happened in the Bournemouth home game) and in addition, it brought on a player
who gives the fucking ball away every time he gets it. I’m all for trying stuff but when Boufal gets
it on the half way line I shit myself.
If he gets it and can run at full back then fine but otherwise he’s a
nightmare. Tadic should have been taken
off as he was useless but post-tantrum, he seems immune. Boufal for Tadic and we would still have lost
but certainly by less than we did.
Maya Yoshida has come out and said that we needed to
be braver and he’s dead right. In an away game at City, I think it's fine to
sitting and try and play on the break but at home it is not acceptable and you
have to say that if you just let Manchester City and sides of the quality have
the ball and pass it around then there is no way that they are not going to
score.
It was also a bit of a reminder of what we have lost.
If we'd had Virgil and Romeu playing today then we would have at least had a
better chance of defending solidly for 90 minutes but with the players we have
out there today, there was absolutely no chance. Yoshida and Stephens again did
ok but they were always going to crack at some point and goals 1 and 3 were
poor from their point of view. There is
no point in pretending otherwise. The
central midfield screen did ok but not well enough to plug all the holes - Steve
Davis was one of our better players today and Pierre Hojbjerg, despite putting
in two or three shocking passes that went straight to the opposition, actually
had quite a good game. Going forward we offered very very little. The line of
attacking midfielders, so good in recent weeks, where non-existent aside from
the old dart by Redmond. JWP was missing
in action but at least he was working hard and adding to the defensive
effort. Tadic is either a 9/10 player
or 4/10 and today he was at the lower end of the scale. Against teams
like City you really have to take your chances and we had the first and best
chance of the first half but Tadic managed to hopelessly waft the ball over the
bar from the edge of the box. I thought at the start that Shane Long should've
started today with Gabbiadini coming off the bench. As it was it wouldn’t have
mattered as the striker had no support so Otamendi and Kompany could mark the
Italian between them as our three attacking midfielders had very very average
games. The full backs, usually two of our best players haven’t got forward
either as they were too shit scared keeping an eye on De Bruyne and Sané who I
have to say were both excellent.
Also, we would've lost to whoever the referee was but
it was another one way performance in favour of the big club. How we can have
three bookings yet Vincent Kompany can go through the back of players about four
times with no punishment says it all and also the tackle by Otamendi on Shane Long
was ridiculous but ‘play on’ and oh look they've scored a 3rd goal. Oh
yeah… what the fuck was that all about with Shane Long getting substituted 20
minutes after coming on. Apparently one of the medical staff said he was
injured so Claude took him off. One thing is certain, Shane did not wanna come
off and certainly let his feelings known.
So, in summary… Manager – crap, team – crap, fans –
crap.
Next up we have a similar assignment in that it’s
Chelsea away. Chelsea were walking to
the title a few weeks ago but now they are shitting it as Spurs are only 4
points behind them. In my view, this
game has just got a whole lot more difficult unless we can play on any
nervousness they might have. Sit back
and let them boss everything and there’s only one way that one is going to go. I’m going to this one so if you’re going to
film Chelsea goal celebrations – make sure I’m not sat near you.
PS
– Whilst I have been putting this together, the Skates have managed to clinch
promotion from League 2. I would like to
say that I am pleased for all my mates who support them. A couple of them had had really tough times
the past year with divorces and deaths in the family and all that shite that’s
more important than football. It’s good
for them to have something good to take their minds off it for a bit. Football is great for that.
On
the other hand, the team with the largest budget, largest wage bill and biggest
crowds by miles has just scraped out of the 4th tier of English
football in 3rd place. Whoopee-do! The fact that they made a loss last year in a
clear example of not learning from your mistakes, will be glossed over by a
fawning media who will crap on about where they have come from and not mention
how they got there in the first place.
All their fans who I don’t know, who will be giving it the large one can
go and do one – and so can Alex.
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