Euro 2020 Part 7 - It's Coming ... to Rome

 

The Best Team Won

Day 22 – Sunday 11^th July – The Final

55 years of hurt, apparently.

I wouldn’t actually say that hurt is the right word, I’d say it’s been 55 years of being resigned to England royally screwing up at some point. I don’t think I’ve ever, in that 55 years (and I’ve lived through 52 of them) actually expected England to win anything. We could’ve won in 1990 and we probably should’ve won in1996.  Other than that we’ve either had managers who have squandered very good generations of footballers and underachieved or we’ve just not been very good or alternatively, we’ve had players who have been good enough but have been so ego driven, it was more about them as individuals than the team. Yes, that’s you I’m looking at Rio, Frank, Stevie.

Does the 55 years of nothing end today? Well, it isn’t going to be easy. Italy have been one of the standout teams since the first game, even though they were playing relatively poor opposition, they showed a panache and the style of play that was going to be difficult for anyone to deal with. Of course, they have had a bit of luck along the way, what with winning a penalty shootout in the semi-final and but they have also had bad luck as well, with the injury to Spinazzola, probably their star performer and the only left back who never finds himself in the left back position.

England of course have grown as the tournament has gone on, Gareth Southgate has silenced his doubters so far because of results and of course, we have home advantage in the final. It’s that against a 33 match unbeaten run for the Italians.  Play the game and not the occasion is going to be a huge thing this evening. The Italians, with the experience they have got in their side, should be fine on that score but they do have a couple of hot-headed players, like Veratti who always seems to walk the disciplinary tight rope.

News from the England camp is that Phil Foden his struggling with an injury which is bad news without being a game changer. It just means we have one less good option to come off of the bench should we need a goal.

I’ve been pondering the reputation of England with other countries since the semi-final, whilst looking at a map of the British Isles with Scotland being retitled North Italy, Wales West Italy and Ireland as Far Western Italy. All good clean fun and so was the picture on the front of the Scottish newspaper with Roberto Mancini photoshopped onto a picture of Braveheart. I actually get annoyed with English supporters saying “why don’t you support us after you’ve gone out, we always support you“. Firstly, I absolutely do not support them, in the same way that I don’t support Portsmouth when Saints have been knocked out of the FA Cup and they are still in it. Secondly, why do we care? Do we need other supporters from other countries? I don’t think we do – actually we could do with some of the well behaved ones to replace some of our dickheads and more on that later. As a postscript, I used to work in Ireland and it always amused me when I would watch a Manchester United game in a pub in the Champions League and the Irish were singing Rooney’s praises but the following week when he was playing for England, he was any four letter word that you like.

Today marks the end of a tournament that was always going to have an element of rubbish about it, a) because of Covid b) because of staging it in multiple non-neighbouring countries and c) the 24 team format.

It’s worth remembering that this was the brainchild of Frenchman Michel Platini who, in his final act before he went to prison, gave the casting vote to make France the single host in 2016 and then came up with this monstrosity for 2020. Travel distances were always going to be a nightmare in non-neighbouring countries, especially when one of them is Azerbaijan. Still, I’m sure that the Platini pension pot is quite healthy.

As far as the 24 team format is concerned, it tends to get forgotten when we’ve had a few weeks of knockout games that have all meant something but having four third place teams getting through the groups is rubbish. The ideal size for the Euros is 16 teams but it is of course much more likely to be expanded to 32 than to go back to 16.

Back to today and in the build up to the kick-off there are reports filtering through of England fans acting like complete knobheads in the streets but also storming the turnstiles and breaking into the ground. These people are beyond contempt really. It really shouldn’t be a surprise to anybody but apparently it was to the organisers, who didn’t have the requisite security in place around the ground. 

The teams have been announced with Italy unchanged and England switching to 3 at the back with Trippier coming into the side instead of Saka. This is the same formation as when we played against Germany but in that game we had Saka instead of Mount. Therefore, there is some big pressure on Mason Mount to provide some dynamism and thrust down the wing and to be honest, I’m not sure about that selection.

The game starts with a wobble as Maguire needlessly passes the ball out for an Italian corner but from it we spring forward through Shaw, infield to Kane and he switchea the ball out wide to Trippier in oceans of space. Trippier gets his head up and superbly picks out Luke Shaw galloping into the box and he smashes it first time on the half volley against the inside of the post and past Donnarumma before he can move. Two minutes, 1-0 to England, fucking hell, what a start.

As Starts Go... This Wasn't Bad

The Italians look shellshocked and can’t handle England’s shape. Italy play in a narrow 4-3-3 formation and they all seem to be arguing with each other as to who should get out and mark the wing-backs. It takes them about 10 minutes to sort it out and slowly the Italians start coming into the game. England are closing down relentlessly though, with Rice and Phillips constantly getting to the Italian players. Predictably, England are already struggling to do anything at the top end of the pitch with Kane dropping deep to try and get involved and Sterling chasing lost causes. Mount meanwhile is struggling to have any meaningful touches of the ball.

Italy haven’t created much but you can tell that they have now taken over as the better side. Chiesa picks up the ball in midfield and bundles his way past Declan Rice before shooting just wide from the edge of the box. We need to wrestle back some of the initiative and most of our good play is coming down the left-hand side through Luke Shaw but it’s somewhat telling that he gets down the line and gets in a cross which flashes across the penalty area and we don’t have a single player in the box.

Half time and 1-0 up. Overall it’s been a good half but one thing is certain, we can’t play as we have done in the last 20 minutes and expect to still be in front when the final whistle goes. There has to be some sort of tactical tweak to make Italy have to think again. The tide is definitely turning and whilst we still have our heads above water, our feet are getting wet.

Chiellini has spent the build-up to this game, shithousing anyone that will listen about Sterling going to ground too easily and I’m not saying it influenced the referee but what I am saying is that he was right, as Sterling tries to burst in between him and Bonucci and hits the deck. Bjorn Kuipers, the excellent Dutch referee is having absolutely nothing to do with it.

Mancini makes his changes and takes off Immobile, who has been absolutely shite. Chiesa is now on the left with Insigne in the middle and this gives us a different kind of problem. Chiesa has a shot from a narrow angle which Pickford pushes away and then the same player cuts across the top of the penalty area and in on his right foot, hammering it goalward, forcing Pickford to get down well to save again.

There is brief respite as John Stones heads over from a Shaw corner but we are largely now, defending in our own half with Italy passing the ball about, totally in control. When we get it, we usually then just smash it up the pitch and the whole process starts again.

As Inevitable as Night Following Day

On 68 minutes, the inevitable happens. The corner comes in from our left, it’s flicked on at the near past, Veratti, all 5 foot 5 of him, wins a header against Mount and heads it goalward, Pickford pulls off an unbelievable save to tip it onto the post but can do nothing as it rolls out and there is Bonucci to knock it into the net. Bollocks.

Southgate immediately makes a change with the back five being abandoned with Trippier going off and Saka coming on. Not long afterwards, Henderson is on the excellent Declan Rice. There is no immediate improvement and no pressure on the ball and Bonucci is allowed to get his head up and play a ball over our entire team which is met by Berardi it was very unfortunate to fire over the bar as Pickford came flying out.

Saka is having very limited success down are right and side button one occasion he does get away from Chiellini who grabs the back of a shirt and throws him to the ground. It’s so cynical it’s almost funny.

Into extra time we go and Southgate finally makes the change that should’ve made about half an hour ago with Mount being replaced with Grealish. England immediately start looking slightly more positive and getting on the ball and Phillips shoots a couple of yards wide from the edge of the box after a Shaw corner is cleared out to him.

Italy have a couple more chances with Bernardeschi beating Walker and putting have a really dangerous cross which Pickford manages to clear whilst looking the wrong way but he has to look the right way as extra time winds down as Italy get a freekick about 30 yards out and Bernardeschi clears the wall but luckily, it straight down Pickford’s throat.

Jorginho then puts in a challenge on Grealish which would’ve got him sent off in the Premier League and with penalties looming, we could certainly have done with him getting sent off but as as is the norm in this tournament, the referee is lenient.

There is one last chance for England as a Grealish shot is blocked, Kane crosses and Stones gets across in front of Donnarumma but can’t get a touch. As we reach the last minute, Southgate makes two substitutions for penalties with Rashford and Sancho coming on four Walker and Henderson. Being substituted is actually Henderson‘s biggest contribution to the game since he came on. Somewhat alarmingly, the board goes up and we still have five minutes left to play and so we have Marcus Rashford playing at right back and having to put tackles in. Luckily, we reach the end and now for the penalty shoot-out that I am not remotely confident for. Harry Kane wins the first toss to choose ends and Chiellini wins the second one to go first.  Chiellini doesn’t try any of the games he tried with Spain in the semi-final.

Here we go…

Berardi - Wouldn’t it be nice if they missed the first one? Wouldn’t it be nice if one of them does a Graziano Pelle and chips it pathetically wide…. Goal, comfortably, maybe later. 1-0

Kane - Bloody hell Donnarumma looks an absolutely massive unit. Just hit it properly Harry, please… Bang, brilliant pen. Doesn’t matter how big you are or if you go the right way or not, you’re not saving that one. 1-1

Belotti - got to have a chance here. If he can’t get in the team ahead of Immobile, he can’t be that good, miss it you fucker…. saved Pickford. What a shite penalty. 1-1

Pick This Out

Maguire - seriously? Maguire does know he’s not allowed to head it doesn’t he? Don’t head it… Bang, top bins, fucking hell what a penalty. Come on! 1-2

Bonucci - Well he’s not going to miss, he just isn’t… Bollocks, Pickford has gone the right way but he’s just chipped it over him. 2-2

Rashford - not very confident I have to admit, here goes, stutter, stutter, stop, time stands still, keeper goes right, Rashford left… hit the post, fuck! 2-2

Bernadeschi - he’s very average, Come on Jordan…fuck it, straight down the middle 3-2

Sancho - confident lad, come on, stutter, stutter, Donnarumma saves easily, fucking hell. 3-2

We're Gonna Win It!

Jorginho - this is to win it then…oh this bastard is never gonna miss is he…. Hop step jump wanker… no problem says Jordan, I hope you’re right son… What a fucking save, arise Sir Pickford. 3-2.  One more for sudden death.

Saka - what the fuck are we sending him up for and not Sterling… Oh shit, why do left footers always look dodgy on penalties?… easy save, fuck.

Oh No We're Not

My first thought was that there was going to be loads of racist abuse on Rashford, Sancho and Saka’s social media. It is depressing that it is the first thing you think of now.

In the immediate aftermath of the defeat there were several things going through my mind. First of all, why the fuck do we have a 19-year-old kid taking the pressure fifth penalty. Raheem Sterling was still on the pitch and I would’ve had Saka behind Grealish, Phillips and Shaw. I don’t blame anyone who actually took a penalty and had the guts to do so, for missing but I have to question the penalty techniques of Rashford and Sancho. If that is how you always take your pens and you take them regularly then fair enough but if you’re going to completely stop as you run up to the ball then it is going to look horrifically bad if you miss.

Italy deserved to win over 120 minutes, no question about that. They kept the ball for long periods of time and when England got it, we just banged it forward and gave the ball back to the Italians every time. No wonder we were knackered. We did well to get to penalties in truth.

The manager has got more or less everything right and got us into the major final of a tournament for the first time since 1966 so you cannot criticising too much but as you’d expect, I’m going to. If you forget about the rest of the tournament and just look at this game in isolation, I’m afraid Gareth Southgate got it horribly wrong.

It started with the team selection. The last time we played this formation was against Germany when the front three contained both Saka and Sterling so we had some pace. Leaving Saka out and leaving Mount in the team meant that most of the time, there was no way of stretching the Italian ageing defence, especially when the wingbacks weren’t able to get forward and we did end up with the 7–0-3 formation which just let the Italians have the ball and pass us to death.  Actually it was 7-1-1 with Kane dropping into midfield and Mount being nowhere.

The substitutions were a nightmare - Why was Jack Grealish only given 25 minutes to try and win that game for England. Mason Mount was having an absolute stinker and was barely finding an England player with any pass and also, was offering nothing defensively. That substitution should’ve been made as soon as Italy scored. Declan Rice was having a fantastic game in the centre of midfield and though he was admittedly tiring, replacing him with Jordan Henderson just made us worse. Henderson has done okay in the games where he has appeared in this tournament but his lack of match practice looked apparent straight away today as he struggled to get with the pace of the game. Okay, it was unfortunate that the two lads who were brought on to take penalties both missed but Henderson and Walker were replaced five minutes from the end of a second period of extra time. Can you imagine the nightmare if we had let in a goal before that and not even got to penalties with Rashford playing at right back?

Our wingbacks surprised them initially as the Italian back four wants to play fairly narrow and neither the midfielders or the forwards seem to know who was supposed to be tracking forward runs from Trippier and Shaw. They sorted the problem out though by basically keeping the ball in midfield and passing it which meant that we dropped into a back five and our wingbacks were kept busy watching Chiesa and Insigne. We had three centre backs marking Immobile and could’ve done with John Stones stepping into midfield and helping out Rice and Phillips. Mancini made his changes early to keep the energy levels up and to sort out problems. Southgate took too long either to recognise the problems and certainly took too long to correct them.  Don’t get me started on the penalty takers…

Overall, this game was so much like the defeat to Croatia in the World Cup Semi-Final 3 years ago.  Today as then, we went in front early, allowed the opposition to play themselves back into the game and the control it and pass it around at will and then we got knackered and had nothing to respond with.  The only difference really being that we lost that game in extra time and this one on penalties.

The fans, the genuine ones, were magnificent. When you look at the passionate, well-behaved England fans, there are none better. However, there are too many England fans who are an absolute fucking nightmare. Considerable numbers forced their way into the ground yesterday and though it was played down officially, there are too many eyewitness accounts for it to be the minimal disturbances alluded to by the official channels. The pictures emerging from around London, in various squares and meeting places told a sad story as well. Every country has its idiots but we have more than most.  People are saying it will derail any bid for the World Cup in 2030 – I doubt that.  Next year the World Cup is in Qatar – need I say more.  The awarding of that tournament was managed by Platini’s mate, Sepp Blatter.

So where does this rank in amongst England’s near misses. You would expect that losing on penalties in a major final would be the worst but it really isn’t. For me, 1990 was worse, as was 1996. Obviously, I’m older now but I think that the fact that it was the Italians softens the blow a bit in my book. Losing to Germany om 90 and 96 was worse and at least we put that one right in this tournament.

Over the course of the tournament, the attitude of the players and the manager has been exemplary and you cannot really dislike this group of players at all. They all seem very down-to-earth and humble, which is a refreshing change. You only have to look at the pundits in the studio, who were in the main, part of Sven’s failed golden generation, to remember what it used to be like. Let’s hope that we can continue to improve under Southgate and become more progressive and use more of the attacking players that we have at our disposal. There of course have been the knee-jerk calls for Southgate to be sacked after one bad game. That would be madness, which we only lost on penalties. Statistically, he is the best England manager since Sir Alf Ramsey. He has had two tournaments which have brought a semi-final and final. I do question whether he he’s just too cautious to ever get us over the line but he deserves another opportunity at least and it is after all, only just over a year away.

Also, can we put that fucking song to bed now? It’s not coming home. As Leonardo Bonucci yelled down the camera, it’s coming to Rome.

Euro 2020 Part 6 - (One More Game and Maybe) It's Coming Home

England Celebrate a 1-2 Off the Keeper

Day 20 – Tuesday 6^th July (Italy 1 Spain 1 (4-3 on pens)

Semi-Final time

Both managers made somewhat surprising changes with Roberto Mancini bringing in Chelsea reserve (who never plays), Emerson Palmieri to replace the injured Spinazzola and Luis Enrique decided his team will be better served at not having a centre forward as opposed to Álvaro Morata. Enrique picked Oyarzabal upfront with Olmo on one wing and Ferran Torres on the other. They also had the very average Eric Garcia in central defence alongside every Spaniards favourite Frenchman, Aymeric Laporte - he who still can’t close his Spanish passport in case the ink smudges.

I generally thought these two teams were going to cancel each other out and it would be a bit dull but the opening of the game showed it was never gonna be like that. Italy were the first to show, tearing into their opponents and Emerson worked an opening down the left and put Barela throughout his chip over the stranded goalkeeper bounced off the far post. In the event, the flag went up afterwards anyway. Spain then got into possession mode and in the main didn’t create much because they were trying to play without a centre forward, so they didn’t actually have anyone in the box.  Olmo had an effort from the edge of the box which was well saved by Donnarumma and Oyarzabal had a good opening for a shot from the edge of the box but Row Z. Half-time and 0-0, Cracking game though. The Spanish looked the more accomplished footballing side but Italy looked more the more dangerous when they did attack.

After 10 minutes of much the same in the second half, Italy took the lead when after a break up the left hand side, Chiesa picked up the ball and scored an almost identical goal to the one Insigne scored Belgium. This time it was Laporte and Garcia not covering themselves in glory as defenders as he bent his right foot effort around them and inside the far post with Simon not even managing a dive as it went past him.

Morata: Good Times

Louis Enrique utilised his bench, one of which was bringing on Morata because there was no way Morata could be worse than Oyarzabal who signed off by missing an absolute sitter of a header from an Olmo cross by basically shutting his eyes and missing the ball. Unbelievably, Morataa had a brilliant 15 minutes and was a constant menace to the imperious Chiellini and Bonucci, culminating with him driving forward with the ball, playing a 1-2 with the impressive Olmo and then sliding it past Donnarumma to make it 1-1 with 10 minutes to go.

Extra time and the Italians were just content to suck it up and Spain didn’t have enough about them to create any more real clear-cut chances. Anything they did create floundered on the twin rocks of Bonucci and Chiellini and so we came to inevitable penalties.

Chiellini Finds A New Way to Shithouse an Opponent

The first incident was the coin toss with Chiellini doing his level best to intimidate the hell out of Jordi Alba by basically treating it as a big joke and smiling and laughing and hugging the Spanish captain. Would’ve been interesting to see if he would’ve tried that if Sergio Ramos was the Spanish captain. Anyway, Italy first and Locatelli produced a piss weak effort easily saved by Simon. Spain sent up their most impressive player, Olmo, next and he skied about 6 foot over the bar. Dreadful. Five successful kicks followed and then up steps Morata. For a guy who has come on and scored in a semi final, you would think he would be confident but he looked absolutely terrified.  As a fan, you always look for the little signs of who is going to miss and I have never felt more confident that this wasn’t going in.  Needless to say, his half hit penalty was easily pushed aside by Donnarumma and with a hop step and a jump, Jorginho, passed the winning penalty into the corner of the net to put the Italians through.

Morata: Bad Times

Overall, a brilliant game that had everything and neither side deserve to lose. I actually felt sorry for Álvaro Morata. There is no way that he should’ve been sent up to take a penalty because he clearly has massive confidence issues and doesn’t respond well to pressure. The Spanish would’ve taken the semi-final before the start of the tournament I’m sure but losing at this stage is heartbreaking. No such problems for Italy though who will grace the final. Even though they haven’t lost a game for 33 matches, the opposition will feel that they have a chance, simply because of the way for Italy commit players to the attack.

Day 21 Wednesday 7^th July (England 2 Denmark 1)

What’s going on today then? Oh yes, England are in the semi-final of a major tournament. The bad guys who we are up against are Denmark who are of course, not bad guys at all.

Once more the team leaked on the morning of the game and there was just one change from the Ukraine match with the fit again Bukayo Saka taking the place of Jadon Sancho. Again, I am not here to pick holes in Gareth Southgate’s selection, I am just here to report on it.

There’s a decent chance each in the opening minutes of the game.  Kane drives forward and feeds Sterling who cuts in and then scuffs his shot.  Dmasgaard gets on the ball on the left of the England penalty area, works a yard and then shoots just wide of the far post.  The first 25 minutes flies by despite no more goalmouth incident.

Lying on the Ground Behind the Wall, Didn't Help Much

On the half hour, Denmark win a free kick on our left hand side about 50 yards away but that wasn’t the issue. The issue was when the free-kick was fired over towards the edge of the box, the referee, in amongst about 30 people wrestling, arbitrarily gave a freekick against Luke Shaw who didn’t do very much at all. Now the freekick was 25 yards out. Up steps Damsgaard and it’s over the wall and into the net with Pickford absolutely nowhere. Fuck. He’s played so well this tournament but Pickford will be disappointed as the ball has gone nowhere near the corner of the net. How would England respond to going a goal down?

The answer was, very well indeed as we immediately got down the right hand side and a cross came in from Kane and Sterling met it 5 yards out and managed to put it in the only place where the keeper could possibly save it and it hit Schmeichel before he could move and was cleared away. Great save said the commentators… I guess that’s one way of looking at it… but it really was a diabolical miss.

No one cared a few minutes later though as Saka got down the right hand side beyond Vestergaard and Maehle and as Sterling closed in to tap the cross into an empty net, Simon Kjaer had to do something and ended up doing his job for him. 1-1.

A patchy first half from an England point of view, came to an end. It had been 15 decent minutes, 15 terrible minutes and then 15 good minutes again. Denmark always looked dangerous when they got the ball down and played with Braithwaite, Damsgaard and Dolberg giving the England offence all sorts of problems with their movement. England’s midfield doesn’t seem quite to be at the same pace as it was in previous games.

England start the second half the strong and there’s a “yeaaaaaah- fuck” moment when Mount’s cross from free kick is superbly met by Maguire’s big fat head but Schmeichel’s having a worldie. Great save.

And 67 minutes the Danish manager Hjelmund, rolled the dice with the substitutes with Stryger Larsen, Dolberg and Damsgaard being replaced by Wass, Norgaard and Poulson. That’s three downgrades. Two minutes later, Southgate sent on Grealish for Saka which is certainly not a downgrade.

It’s all England now and Denmark are hanging on.  Kane bundles his way into the box and is taken out  - has to be a penalty but the ref is pointing the other fucking way.  He’s pinged Kane for a real non-event challenge just before.  Fuck’s sake.  It was just a case of whether England could get a winner before the 90 minutes and take advantage of the territorial dominance. Didn’t happen of course and we went to extra time.

The first period of extra time is all England possession and desperately hanging on from Denmark.  Kane barges through on right and with no support, shoots from a narrow angle but once again, well saved by Schmeichel.  Grealish has a lash from the edge of the box and Schmeichel this time has to punch it away.

Denmark may as well be wearing “we want penalties” t-shirts and there were two minutes to go in the first period when Sterling picks up the ball on the right hand side and runs directly at the goal in between Maehle and Jensen and down he goes. Penalty given. On first viewing, it certainly look like a penalty and when you see the replay, not so much. There is the slightest of touches by Maehle and the slightest of touches from Jensen and when that goes to VAR, it isn’t going to get overturned. Soft.

Harry Kane is of course a formidable penalty taker for Tottenham but even he gets the shits in a moment like this and his penalty is dreadful, so dreadful that Schmeichel almost dives too far and the ball gets away from him and back to Kane he buries it to send everybody batshit mental.

I Think Phil Was Pleased

Half-time in extra time and Southgate rolls the dice again, bringing on Trippier and taking of Grealish, which is a bit of a kick in the nuts for a player he was only been on as a substitute for about 40 minutes. We are clearly intent on holding what we have but I don’t think anyone realise that Denmark were playing the last 15 minutes with 10 men because one of their subs Jensen, was unable to continue and they had already made six substitutions. What this meant was that we just sat back with a flat five along the edge of our penalty area, which made the second half of extra time a lot more uncomfortable than it should’ve been.  When we got the ball, we managed it well though, keeping it for 50 odd passes at one point and booked our first appearance in a major national final for 55 years.

You have to say that it was another Southgate masterclass. The team selection was right and the players he put out there did the job. The substitution of the substitute when he took Grealish off the second half of extra time, showed a toughness and an absolute determination to do what he thinks is right. You can’t argue with it and it’s a testament to the spirit in amongst this group of players that he has cultivated, that Grealish seemed to take it quite well. I wonder if Southgate realised that Denmark have gone down to 10 men because we certainly didn’t need to play with five at the back and if anything, that just encouraged Denmark to push on top of us which made the second half of extra time slightly more nervy than it should’ve been.  In reality though, Denmark didn’t really threaten our goal from the 45 minute mark onwards.

Denmark have had a remarkable tournament.  To reach the semi-final after what happened in their first game is remarkable.  They have unearthed a real talent in Damsgaard and Hojbjerg, Maehle, Stryger Larsen, Christensen, Kjaer,, Vestergaard, Delaney, Schmeichel and Braithwaite have proved that they belong at the business end of tournaments.  Overall though, the way that they and their suppoters have conducted themselves has been absolutely first class.  I sense that they just ran out of steam a bit today.

Whattaboutery is one of the biggest curses of the social media age but I’m going to engage in a bit of it. Sterling’s penalty is soft but then so was the free-kick given to Denmark that they scored from. If you’re a bitter supporter from another country complaining that England got a hometown decision, well we didn’t get one in the first half. There was also a much clearer penalty shout on Harry Kane which wasn’t given and would’ve been given in the Premier League. So, you bitter and twisted supporters of other nations, especially the Scots, Welsh and Irish can just jog on. Was it a penalty? I’ve seen them given. Would I be angry if it was given against us? Fuck yeah. That's football.

This game was covered by ITV. Of course, you accept having to go to commercial break just when the atmosphere is building but I don’t accept Sam Matterface as a commentator because he is absolutely fucking dreadful. He was bad throughout but at the end of the game when he was telling everybody to have a day off school or a day off work when we were all just trying to take in the atmosphere as best you can through the TV.  It was absolutely peak “shut the fuck up man“. I’m not a fan of Lee Dixon either and I don’t think Lee Dixon is a fan of Sam Shutyerface, judging by a couple of putdowns in the second half. Another Peak Partridge moment came at 1-1 in the first half with “Another goal for England now would be….. good”.  No shit Sherlock.  Basic rule of TV commentary – if you’re not adding anything worthwhile – shut the fuck up.  Also, Twatterface knew he was shit as well, practically begging viewers to watch ITV on Sunday, rather than BBC.  Thanks for your recommendation mate… no.

I Wonder Why Every Other Country Hates Us

It was brilliant seeing Wembley 70% full and the atmosphere was incredible, despite Matterface trying to ruin it. He wasn’t alone though in trying to ruin everyone’s fun. Did the gammons boo the national anthem of Denmark? Of course they did. It’s embarrassing and pathetic. Did Boris Johnson & Priti “Send ‘em Back” Patel grab a photo op wearing an England shirt in the ground, of course they did. It’s embarrassing and pathetic. Did someone bring a fucking laser pen just to point at Kasper Schmeichel? Oh yes, It’s embarrassing and pathetic.  Ever wonder why other countries hate us?  It used to be because our team and/or manager wasn't very likeable - there's no issue on that score now.

England will take on Italy in the final of the European Championships. I would not have believed that this was possible and it is not a final that anyone would’ve predicted before the tournament. It’s going to be emotional.

Euro 2020 - Part 5 (Is Anyone Beginning to Think That) It's Coming Home

How Big is My Big Fat Fucking Head?

Day 18 Friday 2^nd July – Spain 1 Switzerland 1 (3-1 on pens), Italy 2 Belgium 1

The first Quarter Final was Spain against Switzerland. Spain had started the tournament sluggishly and were actually in danger of going out of the tournament in the group stages until they clicked and hammered Slovakia 5-0 and some people somewhere one assumes, made some money at the bookies.  The Spanish scored five again against Croatia in the Round of 16 but somehow, the perception is that they are a team that can’t score goals. This image is of course because of the performances of Alvaro Morata. Nevertheless, he will no doubt be present again today as they take on the Swiss, surprise conquerors of France in the last round. The more I think about that, the more glorious it gets. Also though, I would find it surprising if they are able to go to the well one more time today.

Spain took the lead early on in somewhat fortuitous fashion as a ropey corner from the right was hammered back into the penalty area by Jordi Alba, flicked off a defender and gave Sommer absolutely no chance. The rest of the first half is nothing much to write home about but the Swiss start of the second-half well and started taking the game to Spain. Ekanji headed wider and Zuber had a close range effort blocked by Simon. They eventually got back in it when Laporte thought he was playing for France and combined with Pau Torres to completely fuck up a harmless looking ball forward. The ball broke to Froyler, who teed up Shaqiri and the little fat bloke knocked it into the net.   Having worked so hard to get back into the game, the Swiss then attempted to commit suicide with Froyler steaming into a challenge on Moreno and catches him with his trailing leg. It’s harsh as you like but off he goes.

The last 10 minutes of the game and the extra time period were basically an attack versus defence training exercise and as we know, the Spanish don’t have that clinical striker so couldn’t force to win so off we went to penalties.

Azpilicueta Celebrates After Goalkeeper Watches Penalty Go into Orbit

The Swiss must’ve been confident going into the penalty shoot-out because they won one a few days ago and the Spanish have 100% record in major tournaments of losing every single fucking one. Anyway, the form book was somewhat turned on its head as Switzerland, with four out of the five penalty takers who took one the other night available, contrived to miss three out of the first four with only Gavranovic finding the net whilst Ekanji, Schaer and Vargas all missed horribly.  Spain just about did enough with Oyarzabal knocking in the winner.   It was tough on the Swiss to go out that way, especially after fighting their way to the penalty shoot-out with 10 men but if you’d offered them a quarter-final place before the tournament started, they would’ve taken your hand off for it.  They can leave the tournament with their heads held high, knowing that they beat the World Cup holders and any team that knocks France out is a friend of mine. The Spanish didn’t look entirely convincing but they are the first team through to the semi-finals.

This My Son, is Defending

Italy and Belgium was the heavyweight clash of the quarter-finals. De Bruyne was fit for the Belgians and they brought in Doku to replace the injured Hazard the Better. The Italians made a couple of changes with Chiesa coming in for Berardi and Georgio Chiellini was fit again. At 38, he has of course been around for years but it’s amazing to see the man who is probably the last to old school Italian defender, Still playing international football at this age.

It was his defensive partner, the 34-year-old youngster Bonnuci who looked to put the Italians head after about 10 minutes when a free kick was delivered from the right hand side, di Lorenzo nudged it on and Bonucci eventually bundled it into the net with his stomach. Unfortunately, the touch on by di Lorenzo meant he weas offside and so one replay was all that was needed to show that it was going to be ruled out. The Italians responded to that setback by just playing in exactly the same way and Belgium had their first decent effort on goal as De Bruyne carried the ball forward before smashing it with his left foot from 25 yards and forcing a sprawling one-handed save from Donarumma, who according to Danny Murphy, is going to be quite a good goalkeeper one day. The Belgian defence was good one day… but it was a long time ago. They have a combined age of about 120 between three of them and they creaked alarmingly as Barela got free inside the box and smashed it across Courtois and in at the far post.  The most remarkable thing about this goal was the contribution of Ciro Immobile. He was basically lying on the ground feigning injury and this put off the very experienced Thomas Vermaelen who forgot about defending just to go and tell him to get up. As soon as the ball hit the net then Immobile was mobile again, funny that.

Having had a warning, the Belgian defence then allowed Insigne to do what he’s always trying to do, which is cutting from the left, onto his right foot and hitting it at the far corner. Neither Alderweireld or Vermaelen covered themselves in glory, static as they were but it was a brilliant strike and Courtois once again had absolutely no chance. The Italians looked to be going in with a very well deserved 2-0 halftime lead until Doku took on Di Lorenzo on the outside, DeLorenzo lent on him and Doku hit the deck. Penalty was given by the Slovenian referee and VAR wasn’t about to overturn it because there was contact. Not enough contact to shove him to the floor but there was contact. Let’s just say that Doku earned the penalty and put himself on the ground rather than the Italian putting him there. Up stepped Lukaku to halve the arrears.

Belgium should’ve been level just after half-time as the ridiculously quick Doku went down the right hand side and pulled the ball across, taking out three Italian defenders and the goalkeeper and it looked like a tap in at the back post for Lukaku but there is no such thing as a tap in for Lukaku when it’s on his right foot.  He managed to poke it goalwards but Spinazzola had got back to block the ball on the line. The miracle of this is that it was Spinazzola, nominally a left back but rarely back on his own and a half. Doku was the main man, weaving across the pitch from the r left hand side, beating three men before crashing over from the edge of the box. For the last 15 minutes, Italians were the Italians of old with some of the most incredible shithousery techniques you have ever seen to waste time. It was almost beautiful in its execution. The one bit of bad news for them was that the excellent Spinazzola collapsed to the ground and whilst Dr Vertonghen insisted he got back to his feet, it turned out afterwards that he had ruptured his achilles and so will be out for the rest of the tournament.

The Italians seem to have a lot of momentum and are going to be tough to stop.  The injury to Spinazzola is going to mean a change in style of play but they'll adapt.  Mancini is a good manager of course and their defenders, whilst as old as Belgium's, are still putting in top level performances.  Chiellini in particular, was brilliant today.

KDB: Doesn't matter what I do, look at those old clowns at the back

Chiellini: Yeah but they're all younger than me

The Belgians meanwhile, can console themselves with the meaningless title of being the Number One ranked team in the world which they have been for the last three years.  You don’t get a medal for that, which to my mind, shows what a load of old bollocks it is. They need to find a new defence before the World Cup in 18 months and I also have a feeling that when it comes to their business end of tournaments, when you are playing the really good sides, their manager isn’t up to it either.

Day 19 - Saturday 3^rd July (Denmark 2 Czech Republic 1, Ukraine 0 England 4)

Delaney Celebrates Having the Penalty Area to Himself

Denmark versus Czech Republic was the appetiser on Saturday and of interest to England because we would hopefully be playing whoever won this game. The Danes were favourites but I expected this to be a close game because the Czech’s looked decent against the Dutch.  However, if you leave players free at corners then you’re in for a long day and it was 1-0 to Denmark after only five minutes as Stryger Larsen’s corner was powerfully headed home by Delaney, who had the freedom of the penalty area to run into. The Czech’s tried to get back into it but in reality, Denmark looked really comfortable and made it 2-0 after 25 minutes when Vestergaard put Maehle away on the left and he curled in a ridiculous cross with the outside of his right foot and Dolberg come steaming in at the back post to double the lead. The Czech’s had to make a better game of it in the second half and Schick added a few more zeros to his price tag by guiding home a cross from the left wing with a smartly taken volley to make it 2-1.  They didn’t seem to have the energy however to make Denmark really work for the win and they held out relatively comfortably to make their fairytale continue.

One Goal appears to Have Cured all Kane's Movement Issues

England had had to travel for the first time in the tournament and were in Rome to play against Andrei Shevchenko’s Ukraine. As usual, the team leaked on the morning of the game and according to that, we were back to a four-man defence and despite therefore, us having an extra attacking player on the pitch and despite his involvement with two goals in the Germany game Jack Grealish was again left out with Mason Mount and Jaden Sancho coming in for Trippier and Saka. Coincidentally I’m sure, Sancho had that morning been revealed as a Manchester United player. So, the talk was that now he was free from distractions, he would be picked.  As it turns out, Bukayo Saka was carrying a knock and Sancho it’s probably the nearest like for like replacement in the squad. I still don’t get it really but after the Germany game, I have decided not to take issue with Gareth Southgate’s decisions. Let’s just go with it and trust that he knows what he’s doing.

We have barely been going three minutes and Raheem Sterling looks like he’s run up a dead end on the left hand side but when off-balance, manages to slide in a wonderful ball to Harry Kane who is clean through and he almost toe pokes it past the keeper into the net. What a fucking start – Harry is alive!  The rest of the first half was fairly controlled, limiting Ukraine to one half chance and having a couple of attempts ourselves with Rice smashing one straight down the keepers throat and then Sancho really should’ve done better when he took a marvellous touch and turn on the edge of the box before firing straight the keeper.

If we were worried that Ukraine were going to come out and have a serious go at it in the second half, such fears were dispelled within five minutes as England won a corner on the left.  Shaw’s delivery was on the money and there was Maguire to get that big fat fucking head of his on it and bullet it into the net. A couple of minutes later and Shaw again down the left, crosses for Kane to head powerfully through the keepers legs from 8 yards to put the game completely to bed. The rest of the game was an absolute cakewalk with England keeping control of the ball for long periods of time and Ukraine waiting for the plane back to Kyiv. Southgate even had the luxury of being able to substitute all the players who were on yellow cards, with Rice and Phillips being replaced with Henderson and Bellingham and it was a nice moment when the corner from the right by Mount was headed in by Henderson at the near post for his first international goal after 50 odd games. Easy.

With a semi-final place secured in such emphatic fashion, there is course the problem now of keeping a lid on expectations.  England have a semi-final against Denmark at Wembley and win that and the final is of course at Wembley as well.  However hyped the fans get, we can rest assured that Southgate will keep a lid on it in camp. He has undoubtedly created an atmosphere which has a lot more humility than previous England groups and the players all seem to be supporting eachother, no matter what.

Denmark will be the best team England have played so far, by a long way. The attacking talents of Dolberg and Damsgaard and the full backs Stryger Larsen and Maehle will need to be contained but if England can do that then, with the players we have in the front half of the pitch, we should have enough to get through, no matter how much Denmark are carried on a tide of Christian Eriksen emotion. They are a popular team so maybe the gammon headed element of our fan base won't boo the Danish national anthem this time. 

I’d just like to highlight by Quarter Final predictions, which picked 4 out of 4 winners, with one perfect score… they were:

Belgium 1 Italy 2, Czech Republic 1 Denmark 3, England 2 Ukraine 0, Spain 2 Switzerland 1

Anyhow, for the semi-finals I’m going with:
Spain 1 Italy 2
England 3 Denmark 2 (aet)